Lost and Found

Losing Worries

The car ride home feels endless, despite the lack of traffic. I'm just so eager to see mum that I find myself fidgeting in my seat, counting down the minutes.

Mum wants to know every step of my journey and keeps saying how excited she is to see me, which makes my heart want to explode. As expected, I see her eagerly waiting outside the front door, arms crossed, in her slippers and cardigan. I wrap her up in the biggest hug I can as soon as I step out of the car. We hold each other forward feels like eternity, tears streaming. This is the longest time we've ever spent apart, and I know it is made worse by the fact that she's all alone in the house.

"I've never missed someone so much!" Her voice trembles with emotion.

"Me neither!" I murmur, feeling the weight of our separation.

"Right come on inside and tell me everything."

 We head inside and settle down with a hot chocolate, and I eagerly tell her everything that has happened over the term. Despite occasional FaceTime calls, there's so much I haven't been able to share because of my busy schedule. I tell her about meeting Saffi and the others, pumpkin picking, setting up the Christmas tree and all about my classes, teachers, and the shops in town.

"And this guy I keep hearing about?" Mum asks as I finish. "Anything going on with him?" 

I feel myself go red, "I don't know... we flirt and hang out, but nothing has happened yet. I think I like him a lot but I don't know if we're ready for anything concrete yet." I admit, surprised by my own nervousness to tell Mum this.

"Okay, well first of all, Miyah, I know you and I can say with full assurance that you can trust your instincts. Also, don't be afraid to take your time; don't feel the need to rush into anything. Make sure he really likes you and you're comfortable with him before committing to anything. Finally, I would say that you shouldn't be afraid to walk away if you find you don't like him or he doesn't like you. There's no point wasting your time if you both don't feel the same way or if you feel he won't treat you with the respect you deserve. Why don't you tell me about him, I may be able to gain a better insight." 

"Well... he's exceptionally kind. He cares so much about all of his friends and he took such good care of me when introducing me to the school. He always, always looks out for me and asks about my day. Um, he's smart and loves to learn. He's got a mischievous side but doesn't take it too far; he just likes to make everyone laugh. He likes to experience life and isn't boring in the slightest. He always comes to find me to ask if I want to go for a walk or go somewhere exciting. And he's a romantic..." My thoughts drift for a second as I say this, reminiscing about the moment on the hay bales and the way he brushed my hair.

"He sounds lovely, Miyah, he truly does. I'd just say to keep getting to know each other and only take things further when you're both ready. And don't let him distract you too much from your school work," she replies and gives me a small nudge.

"Hey mum?"

"Yeah?"

"There's someone else too..." She looks at me, concerned and confused. "Oh nothing romantic... at least from me. But I just feel a little stuck, and well, I don't know what to do..." I feel as though mum is the perfect person to talk about Seth. She's an outsider to the experience, she gives the best advice, and, well, I don't trust anyone more, really. "Well, there's this guy I met at the bookshop in town, Seth, and at first I didn't know whether I liked him romantically or not. I was beginning to develop feelings for Asher at the same time. But the more time I spent with them, the more I realised that Seth is just a really amazing friend, whereas Asher... well, he's the one I think I like romantically." I pause for a breath.