it has been weeks since I've been here, Derrick allows me out now in the house reign i meant, he warns me as long I behave I can roam the house as I wish. and as far as I know I do, I am.. for now.
yes I said FOR NOW. nope I'm not going to coop up here forever . that's not me, for now i'm just earning his trust for later when i have a plan on what to do, or how to escape.
I realize that I cannot trust the girls who lives in the house. yes they are sweet, kind ,gentle most of all innocent. they cannot argue on anything the're all born into submission. And I know they will not help me escape. they react as if this is their home this is the reason they are born and they accept the way they are, they are in fear and there is nothing i can do to make them realize. It's too late for them and I cannot trust them.
I dressed into a plain acid washed purple jeans and a loose white t-shirt. leaving my hair down, I went down seeing them clearing the table up. I was late for breakfast today.
no Derrick didn't had me last night , the matter of affect I've been Derrick Sex free for the past four weeks now. what shock me was he is spending his time with his girl friends. well it wasn't really a shocker but then again I do not really know how to put it either.
i didn't ask, in some level I think this is some sort of a sick test. i think he is testing me on how I will react or how he can punish me. I feel this is some kind of his sick game.
Honestly , he do not have to worry, I don't care. there is no love in this relationship. and i really don't give a crap about him or with whom his having sex with .
walking my self to the kitchen everyone greeted morning to me which i kindly greeted back. the girls here are all sweet as always but then again sadly I couldn't trust anyone. there's around 20 girls staying in this old wooden mansion.
Taking out some bread and jam , I decided to have my toasts and a glass of orange juice. eating my breakfast at the table, I notice Rose seating at the opposite of me, being her silent self as always. She seems to be on deep thoughts arranging flowers in a vase. I think she freshly got them from the garden.
Rose is the only one that I've seen here whose very silent. She has long thick black hair, rather a sun kiss skin and compare to the other girls she is bit of a curvy side and has a round face. she is not fat but curvy while the other girls are very skinny. She has electric blue eyes. Rose is the only one who seems to be on her own. she doesn't speaks to anyone , she helps around but her voice is very limited edition. she will only talk if someone questions her. Tara told me she wasn't like this before, she was actually very bubbly until the day that she got married.
she became worse when her twin ran away. Yes... Sara is her twin sisters. but they are not identical. I know this because Tara showed me their picture once. both beautiful girls. Sara is Tall , slim, long red hair and the same blue electric eyes as Rose has and olive skin , while Rose is tall and very different then Sara. Tara said Sara follows her mother while Rose follows her father.
when it come to the twins it reminds me of Victor and River. I miss them. Its very confusing, I hate them for doing this to me but I miss them, I love them at the same time I miss them. I wonder what they are doing. i wonder whether they miss me as i am.
