After Her Love

34. Broken hearts club

Iiris' PoV

Taking long showers at the hotels or at the Airbnbs was always so much more relaxing for one obvious reason - I did not need to pay the water bill. So just like on those times when I really want to relax under the warm water, I sat down on the floor and just let the water run over me. I had always preferred showers over baths because this way the water did not cool down like it does in the baths. Of course, I loved all the bath foams and stuff but I loved the warm water more.

If in the past the shower was my favorite place to cry because no one could see my tears as they ran down my face, then now it was something else. I felt happy and relieved, mostly because of how things turned out with Aleksi last night. I felt we could finally talk from heart to heart and speak out our minds. It was important so that we could see where we were and it gave us the best possible result - to start again. I'm happy he felt the same and understood my point because continuing from where we left would not create anything else than another chaos, that's what I think. Of course I would have loved to stay there with him and wake up this morning from his bed, him next to me, but it would have been the worst way to start things over. Sure this will probably raise some questions among the others but in the end, it was Aleksi's choice to give me another chance. He could have said no, but we both felt there was something between us that should be studied a little more and see if this all was worth waiting for.

Still, knowing how protective the others are over each other, I might have lost a lot of points because of what I did. They keep close, and their inner circle even closer. I know it takes a lot to let any outsider in, especially when you're some kind of famous person. The fact that I even got into their circle in the first place was still hard to believe because I never saw it coming. I never even thought about it... But Aleksi took me in. He chose to let me in. They all played some sort of role in it actually. If it was my choice, things would probably be different now and I would not be sitting here and letting the warm water run over me while thinking about the date night I was about to have with Aleksi.

After some time, when I felt like over soaked raisin, I turned off the shower and took my towel. When I had the towel all wrapped around my body, I stepped out from the shower cabin and started to do my facial care. The sun had dried my skin a little while I was having my so meaningful walk, but the moisturizing lotions would eventually fix that small problem. In the end, it was the smallest problem I have ever had in my whole life.

Once I was done in the bathroom, I walked to the small living area and looked at all the clothes I had with me. None of those would be good enough for tonight but I did not have time to even go shopping anymore. I had to just hope that Aleksi would not take me to any fancy place but as much as he knew me, he would not do that. I did not want any of that anymore. I was so done with the fancy places after Rauli that I would be just happy with McDonald's or KFC. For me the most important thing was to find the right way to go on with Aleksi and I really hope this evening would show us which way to go. We both wanted to take things slow, enjoy each other's company and be there for each other.. Support one and another..

But what comes to second chances in general.. Then I had plenty of those with Rauli.. With him it was already the tenth or twentieth chance and nothing never changed. It was always the same song - I promise I'll change and I will never hurt you again - and I was the stupid one to believe. Today I could stand in front of the mirror and look at my body being bruise free for the first time in a very, very long time... But will this second change be any different? What if my love life was doomed from the very start? What if the bigger powers had already decided that I was meant to suffer? Aleksi would not do that, right? He is different. He is a good person. He is the first man I could feel myself safe with.. And I felt that the moment I first met him and Joel's and Robyn's wedding. The interaction did not last long that time but what meant the most was the one word he said that sounded the most sincere version of it I had ever heard.. And it was "Sorry". With just one word... With that one word he opened my eyes and showed me the whole new World that I had no idea of.. The World which I had lost and forgotten a long time ago and which was now just a few hours away from me..