𝐯 𝗼 𝐢 𝐜 𝐞 𝐬 [𝐡𝐲𝐮𝐧𝐥𝐢𝐱]

N|ine

"i waited my whole life for someone to do love things with me, and you don't want to,"

hyunjin sat on the couch after putting all the stuff away in the kitchen. he also took time to clean up his room and do the laundry since now that felix was wearing his clothes he was running out quickly. 

although, hyunjin was deep in thought. he was still thinking about what felix said. about him saying he's waited for someone this whole time to do 'love things' with. it didn't surprise him that felix was a virgin, he actually found that kinda cute and he would be honored that felix would want to give his first time to him.

he was more thinking of the context of what they said to each other. i mean, they did basically admit their feelings for each other, but what does that mean now?

hyunjin told felix he wanted to spend forever with him, that's really deep... promising yourself to someone like that. he doesn't want to overwhelm felix.

but he doesn't know if he was right to push felix away. felix is a grown man and he can make his own decisions, but hyunjin just wouldn't be able to do it without really talking to felix about it. he doesn't care about the awkwardness the conversation might bring, he cares for felix's well-being and that's all that matters.  

his thought was interrupted by the door handle jingling open. all the members pilled in all at once rushing to take their shoes off to see who can get the bathroom first, there were only two and since chan is the oldest, he always got to go first in one, (which seungmin calls him an old man for every day).

"come on grandpa move it we all want to shower," seungmin pushed chan's shoulders forward. 

chan only laughed, he turned his head and saw hyunjin's face, and he looked very confused. chan told seugmin he could go first, who took that offer as soon as chan said it. 

chan and minho saw hyunjin not even reacting to them coming in the door so noisy, meaning he was in deep thought. they went to sit next to him. 

when they sat down, hyunjin finally snapped out of his thoughts, changbin joined them on the couch as well. 

"how was your day with felix?" chan asked.

"it was... it was good, I think?" hyunjin questioned himself, wondering if he should tell his hyungs about his and felix's problem.

"what happened?" changbin asked, chugging a water bottle. 

"it's... it's kind of weird. i think? I don't know?"

"hey, talk to us, that's why we're here," minho said leaning back on the couch. 

"well after I took him to the store..., some things led to the other and..." hyunjin was a little nervous. 

"you slept with him?" changbin finished his sentence for him getting a look from chan, "what? am I going crazy or are you guys blind, have you seen the way this man looks at felix?"

minho nodded, "is that what happened?"

"he wanted to, I mean felix said he wanted to continue but... but I said no,"

"do you not like him in that way?" chan asked.

"no, I do, I was the one that started it. if anything it was my idea but I just couldn't, I didn't want to take advantage of him," hyunjin sighed.

changbin looked at him, "why would you be taking advantage of him, I mean he did consent,"

"oh I get what's going on," minho said, "you and felix like each other, and felix wants to take things to the next level but you're scared,"

"yes, I mean, no! I'm not scared, I just don't want to hurt him," hyunjin didn't know if they would understand.

"is it that you see him in this, fragile state and you feel like if you did things with him, you'd be taking advantage of him," chan asked, and he was right.

hyunjin nodded, "I can't do that, it's so unfair to him, he's vulnerable,"

"did you ever think that's just what he needs?" minho said as he rose an eyebrow. 

hyunjin didn't understand,

changbin caught on quickly, "maybe it would help felix, you know, for someone to show love and praise to his body, maybe it would give him the reassurance he needs,"

"you know," chan said, "he really loves you hyunjin, I think that maybe you should show him just enough for now if you don't think he's 100% ready,"

minho smirked, "not daddy chan giving his dongsaeng permission to have a fun night,"

chan threw a pillow at minho, "oi, don't be nasty!"

minho laughed as he stood up walking to the kitchen, "wow that made me hungry, hyunjin what'd you cook for us?"

"I didn't cook," the younger said shrugging his shoulders.

minho turned around slowly, "you didn't cook!? I thought you went grocery shopping??"

"oh yeah I did, but I only got stuff of lix,"

minho felt betrayed, "you better run before I get the air fryer... you have three seconds,"

hyunjin felt his heart jump out of his chest when the air fryer was mentioned, he jumped up so quickly and ran to his own room, thinking it would be better if he went to someone else's to hide. he picked jisung's room since he can get to minho's dangerous heart (honestly hyunjin doesn't know how jisung even manages him). 

he ran into the others' room, passing by felix and the others that were all in han's room. 

 "hyung what's wrong," jeongin said not before he was shushed. 

"I forgot to cook dinner, he's coming, shush, I'm not here," 

and he comes minho behind him, "where is he?"

they all looked at minho, then at the closet, then back at minho, "we don't know" they all said.

minho looked at the closet and smiled but felix jumped up, "hyung it's my fault, jinnie was busy taking care of me, he didn't have time," 

minho looked at felix, then looked at the closet and let out a breath, "just this once." he said pretending to be upset and walking over to jisung, "you see how they treat me, baby, they're so mean,"

"I know, I know honey let's just order some food," jisung patted minho's back,"

____

everyone was eating dinner now, that jisung had ordered for everyone, felix said he wasn't hungry and hyunjin didn't want to pressure him so he sat next to him quietly and whispered, "lix, what are you going to eat? you skipped lunch since you fell asleep,"

felix didn't even turn his head to look at him, "I'm just not hungry hyung,"

hyunjin knew why felix was acting like this, probably still a little upset with him about earlier. but hyunjin couldn't let felix just starve. 

so he tried again, "how about we have one of the snacks you picked out instead of having a full dinner? would that make you feel better?" 

"I'm going to go to the bathroom first okay?"

hyunjin nodded, "okay i'll wait for you,"

all I can say is, he wasn't going in there for the right reasons. 

______

(wc; 1.2k)