kids next door ; tbp chatfic

magical mythical bus?

alive : finney
loser : bruce
paperballs : billy
twitter : robin
climatechange : vance
backbender : griffin
gwen : gwen

( nicknames changed throughout the book. )

- pluto has a fat ass
Sunday, 12:07 PM.

paperballs: what does it mean when a van passes you and the driver says "hi kid"

climatechange: you're saying that as if you're saying "what does it mean when my crush is in my dream!!!!" like bro i am not a physiologist 

loser: is it not biology w that kind of stuff?

paperballs: GUYS HELP

alive: nah it's gotta be philosophy 

paperballs: TEH VAN

twitter: i thought it was geography

paperballs: IT'S FOLLOWING ME

backbender: is it not geometry?

paperballs: GUYS

twitter: nah it's gotta be geography

paperballs: IT'S SPEEDING UP

gwen: geography is fucking countries

paperballs: BRO

loser: and like volcanoes and stuff man i hate the volcano geography

paperballs: I CAN'T BIKE THIS FAST

alive: BILLY SHUT UP

climatechange: BILLY SHUT UP

backbender: BILLY SHUT UP

twitter: BILLY SHUT UP

loser: BILLY SHUT UP

gwen: BILLY SHUT UP
(the messages were all sent at the same time)

paperballs: THERE IS A BLACK VAN FOLLOWING ME AND IT SAYS ABRACADABRA ON IT I'M FUCKING SHITTING MY PANTS

alive: magical mythical bus?

twitter: HELP

backbender: LMFAOOOO

paperballs: I HATE YOU ALL

alive: wait what even happened

paperballs: A VAN IS FOLLOWING MJEJEAHDAWJNK

paperballs went offline!

climatechange: WOOHOOOO HE'S GONE!!!!!

gwen: shut the fuck up vance

climatechange: woah okay

gwen: STOP FUCKING CRYING BITCH WA WA WA WA ION WANNA FUCKING HEAR IT

alive: GWENDOLYN

paperballs: ..gwendolyn?

backbender: GWENDOLYN

twitter: HELPPPP

gwen: shut the fuck up finney i swear two days ago you were talking to yourself about robin in the mirror for like an hour

alive: PROOF?

gwen: 1 video attachment

alive: oh

alive went offline!

twitter: ion even wanna hear it

gwen: I WAS KIDDING

gwen: HE WASN'T ACTUALLY

gwen: THAT'S A VIDEO OF A SHEEP SCREAMING

loser: BRO STRAIGHT UP CALLED FINNEY A SHEEP

backbender: BYE I CAN'T DO THIS TODAY

gwen: NO YOU FUCKING BOYKISSERS THAT IS NOT WHAT I MEANT

twitter: finn locked himself in the bathroom

climatechange: BRO

gwen: FUCK UP YOU FUCKING PINHEAD

twitter: wait for the record was he actually

gwen: wdym

twitter: talking to himself about me

gwen: yeah he does it a lot

backbender: NAHHH

loser: EXPOSED

climatechange: BYE STOP VIOLATING HIM

alive is online!

alive: Who actually ever fucking loved you in your life? Not me, that's for fucking sure. And what meaning do you expect your delusional self-important statements of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have to us who think and reason? What fantasy do you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake? You are a waste of flesh. This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don't have enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half-baked comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of this drivel. Duh. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a load of babbling was hardly effective.

alive: hey guys

loser: hey finn

twitter: finney

loser: finn

twitter: finney

loser: finn

twitter: finney.

backbender: why ya'll fighting over a name

twitter: finn is my thing

climatechange: hey whatever happened to billy

loser: since when did you care about billy..?

paperballs: guys the magical mythical bus man took me lolsies

paperballs: it's fine i climbed out the window but i left a note

backbender: ..

loser: you left a note

alive: for a kidnapper?

paperballs: yeah!! i mean he should know why i left

twitter: oh billy

twitter: my sweet summer child

twitter: my brother in christ

twitter: YOU DON'T FUCKING TELL A KIDNAPPER WHERE YOU'RE FUCKING GOING YOU FUCKING CUNT

climatechange: i cannot comprehend how many times you said fucking in one sentence

backbender: real

cimatechange: shut up scoliosis ahh

alive: NAHHH

paperballs: nah cus remember bruce's anime phase

alive: GN.

alive: I DID NOT NEED TO BE REMINDED OF THAT

climatechange: anime phase?

paperballs: NAURRRR

backbender: GN

loser: STOP IT

loser: #JUSTICEFORBRUCE

paperballs: ..the edits

alive: "10 reasons why mha saved my life!!!"

paperballs: LMFAOFAJIHFIK

backbender: GOODBYE

paperballs: you were really.. living it up then bruce weren't you?

loser: i fucking

loser: i thought we left this in the past

alive: IT WAS SOMETHING THAT WAS NEEDED TO BE TALKED ABOUT

loser: NO IT WASN'T?

twitter: your memories are the books i read

paperballs: LMFAO

loser: close the fucking book and burn it