SECRET GAMES (BOOK 2) (girlxgirl)

Chapter Nine

MOLLY'S POV
HOW IT FEELS TO FEEL NOTHING

I hadn't seen Danielle in a long while and it hurt. Today was the long awaited day and I somehow felt cranky. I hadn't seen Liz either and the fact that she knew had me on edge. She hadn't come back last night and I was thinking she'd found Stella and told her. I had to find Danielle before that happened and let her know so that she wouldn't be surprised if word ever came out about our secret games.

I looked myself in the mirror, my eyes capturing hold of my marriage ring. Part of me wished Danielle was the one who had put it there cause then I wouldn't have the urge to take it off, but, another part found it insane that I was throwing everything away just because of her. I looked myself up and down again, if only I could recognise the person I had become.

"Go find Danielle," I whispered to myself. Danielle was in one of the rooms in this huge mansion. Yes, the wedding was being done in a mansion not a church. I don't even know how Danielle managed to afford a mansion that could easily be LeBron's house.

I walked out, making my way down the corridor and bumping into a bunch of guests coming in and walking out. Most of them hadn't seen her but I got my break when saw one of the other bridesmaids who told me which room she was in. After what felt like an eternity I finally stood outside the door, heart beating out of my chest and knocked. The sound of her voice telling me to walk in made everything real and I just wanted to run away instead but I shrugged away that thought, slowly opening the door and walking inside.

"Danielle," I heavily breathed out, taking in how handsome she looked in her black tuxedo but that wasn't what I was there for so instead of drooling in admiration I continued, "She knows."

I'm not quite sure if she didn't catch the urgency in my voice or if I had something stuck in my face cause she just stood there frozen, her eyes stuck on me. After a while though she cleared her throat and her eyes focused somewhere else. She was somewhat acting weird.

"I know Molly."

"You know," I repeated after her, "You need to stop the wedding."

"I can't."

"What do you mean you can't, Danielle if Stella finds out ---"

"I think she already knows."

"Then stop the goddam wedding before everything else falls apart!"

She looked confused and lost. But surprisingly she walked towards me and pulled me into her, her eyes stared right into mine making me notice how bloodshot red there were, she'd been crying.

"You look so beautiful tonight," she whispered. I wanted to say something, anything, but my mind suddenly wasn't working and words were stuck in my mouth. Seeing her like this tore me apart. This didn't have to happen, she could just stop the wedding and we'd be together. I mean obviously we would be fucking with other people's feelings but I knew she loved me and I loved her back. Wasn't that enough reason to break both Liz and Stella's hearts.

"Danielle, someone might walk in," I spoke. Regardless of the fact that I would rather be stuck in this moment than have her leave for the wedding, part of me felt like I couldn't risk it. Danielle didn't budge though. She looked as if she had a lot on her shoulders, like she would break down any second; she looked weak and that was not the Danielle I knew.

"I knew I loved you when you told me you love me first but I just couldn't say it back. I kinda figured it was fucked up, the fact that I started to consider the possibility that we were meant to be. Before you I was so sure I wanted to spent the rest of my life with Stella but now --- now all I want is you Molly, fuck, in fact all I need is you," her palm rested on my cheek,"If I could I would choose you."

"Danielle ---"

"Molly, I love you."

"You can't."

"That's why I won't stop the wedding. What Stella doesn't know won't hurt her."

"Oh but you don't know Liz," I sighed.

I knew Liz could be a bitch if she wanted, especially if her ego was bruised, "She's gonna tell her Danielle."

"I guess we'll have to wait and see."

She stared at me for a while before her hands pulled me to her and landed on my ass, caressing it so gently. I knew what she was about to do but in as much as I wanted her to do it I was nervous. I didn't get the chance to think it through though because when her lips landed on mine my brain completely shut down.

Her mouth felt so warm and her lips were so soft. She kissed me with so much care and so much love I regretted not being the one she was marrying. I was so caught up in the feels that I didn't taste the saltiness of the tears at first but when it dawned on me I pulled away from the kiss and looked at her bloodshot teary eyes. She was crying.

"Danielle ---"

"Go Molly," she didn't let me finish, "I need to get ready, it's already late."

"Danielle you don't have to do this."

"I do, you don't understand, I do."

I locked eyes with her and felt my heart tear apart, "We can just leave, you and me, let's leave."

"No you can leave Molly, I ---"

"Danielle ---"

"Go."

When I left her standing there somehow a part of me knew something was going to happen. I had this lump in my throat that I just couldn't swallow down. She'd said she loves me but she couldn't choose me, that hurt my feelings but at the same time I understood. What we had started was a dangerous game on its own, it didn't have to end how it was about to end. But then there was nothing I could possibly do to change it all, if I could though, I would convince Danielle that I was worth choosing.

***

I knew Stella wasn't likely to get cold feet on her wedding day. Something was up. Danielle stood at the alter clearly nervous after Stella hadn't shown up after me and the other bridesmaids had came in. Something was really wrong, I knew she knew too, considering the fact that Liz was also not here. It was after an excruciatingly painful half an hour that my phone buzzed and I received a text from Liz asking me to come back to the house. I looked over at Danielle and she was talking to the priest. Everyone else was talking among themselves, obviously talking about the bride who didn't show up.

Danielle left with the priest and as she did, I made my way out as well. I had to drive back to the house and see what Liz was up to. I knew though, I felt it in every part of me that it was about Danielle and I. As I drove I thought of any lie I could tell to change Liz's mind if she ever decided to divorce me but there was none I could think of. I honestly wanted to come clean about Danielle and I. I was done playing hide and seek in a game that involved my emotions in it. I couldn't take it anymore.

It didn't take long to reach the house cause it wasn't that far from the wedding venue. As I pulled up, surprisingly, Danielle's car pulled up too. What in the world was going on. What was she doing here?

"What are you doing here?," she took my words right out of my mouth. She clearly looked puzzled, and heartbroken. It was probably because of the Stella situation.

"Liz told me to come here."

The colour from her face drained. Did she know something I didn't? I doubt but still I was curious.

"What are you doing here?"

She let out a sigh, "The priest said Stella wanted to see me."

"I think ---"

We both looked at each other with knowing eyes before saying in unison, "They're both here."