Revelations of the Heart

Seeing Red.

Aella Jones, 16 years old
New York, New York 2017
When my brother and his new bride left me in the care of three mutant turtles and a rat for a month, I really thought life would be sweet. I could get away with stuff that Casey never would have let me, I could run around at night with the guys, and my major food groups would be pizza and soda. Instead, I might as well have joined a convent. Raphael acted like a prison guard, and Donnie and Mikey just went along with it because Leo had left him in charge. He made me use the tracker watch 24/7, vetoed everything I wanted to wear, and implemented a 'straight to school then straight to the lair' rule. I had to be 'escorted' if I needed to leave the lair for any other reason. I had to cancel all my babysitting for the month and I only saw Nicole at school, which sucked. If it was possible, he was worse than Casey had ever been, even right after mom died and he thought he had to prove he was parent material. By week 3 of Raphael's tyranny I had had enough. I mean what would he actually do to me if I disobeyed him for one night? But just in case he put me on total lock down until Casey came home I was gonna make my insubordination count. Nicole had told me that this guy in the grade above us had been asking about me, information obtained by her older cousin Shayla. His name was Elijah, and he was honestly pretty cute, blonde and tan with a boyish charm that made him popular. After securing a movie date with him and a friend who would double with Nicole, my genius plan was in motion. The idea was to change in the locker room after school, ditch the tracker in an alley between school and the lair, and worry about the consequences later. Simple enough. We got through the arcade, dinner, and a 2 hour movie without a hitch. I had cut my phone off almost immediately after ditching the watch, so I knew the guys couldn't find me until I wanted to be found. Nicole and Brady, her date, had split after the movie theater, leaving Elijah to walk me to my apartment. I planned to let him walk me half of the way and say goodnight, but he wasn't getting the hint. I couldn't very well let him walk me to a manhole cover and say, 'Well, this is me!' and I was getting nervous. I was about to say 'screw it' and just take him to the loft when I heard a voice that sent chills down my spine. 'Hey 1D reject. She's been trying to get you to leave her alone for two blocks now. Don't make ME tell you twice.' Raph. I looked around but I couldn't see him. Elijah looked freaked out, and quickly said goodnight before sprinting in the other direction. I took my time walking to the next alley, reaching the closest manhole. I heard a heavy thump behind me, and Raph reached around me to lift the cover. I risked a glance up at him and instantly regretted it. He was livid. 'Go', he said in a voice almost too low for me to hear, and I scrambled down the ladder. He was quiet the whole way to the lair, and when we walked inside I could tell we were alone. 'Where is everyone else?' I asked quietly. He stood silently, hands gripping the back of the couch, not facing me. His posture was rigid, and he was almost shaking. I wanted to take back the whole night when he replied, 'Everyone else is still out looking for you, and we're gonna tell them you're back, but not until I've had my piece of your hide. Who the f*** was that? Your boyfriend? Does Casey know that you wear skimpy little clothes to hang out with him? And why the hell would you ditch your watch and cut off your phone? What if something had happened to you and we couldn't find you? What if you were hurt, or dying, and I couldn't get to you in time? What then?' I opened my mouth to answer, and he lunged at me, pinning me to the wall with one hand, the other beside my head. 'No. You don't get a chance to explain yourself. There's no excuse that would be good enough. You're MINE. You're my responsibility until Casey gets home. If something happened to you it would kill my brothers, and Casey would hate me.' He stood over me, breathing hard, and I realized I had severely underestimated how upset he would be. I began to feel cold under his glare, and I spoke up quietly. 'Can I go change, Raphael?' His expression shifted, from anger to a blank stare. 'So you'll wear whatever for some asshole that doesn't know how to take a hint, but me seeing you like this makes you uncomfortable? Is it because you think it affects me? Are you embarrassed that a 6 foot mutant knows how good you look? Are you afraid I'll try something like I'm sure that boy did tonight?' He slipped a hand between my flannel and my tee, warmth hovering over bare skin. I felt hot and cold at the same time now, half hoping he would just touch me. But he pulled away, saying, 'I actually have more control than that. Don't worry about me ever touching you.' And then he was gone, headed towards Leo's room. I sank to the floor with my head in my hands and sobbed, not even sure what for. I heard voices from the tunnel entrance, and Mikey and Donnie walked in. Mikey immediately ran over to me and swung me up, saying they had been so worried and to never do that again, and Donnie just handed me my watch back with a small smile before heading to his lab. Mikey set me down and dragged me over to the couch to make me tell him all about my prison break until Splinter appeared in the doorway and asked him for a minute with me. He sounded serious, and I got nervous. He sat down opposite me and paused like he was trying to figure out what words to use. 'I heard Raphael talking to you. He can be foolish, and he says many things out of anger, but I have found that with Raphael, there is usually a deeper meaning to his anger. Sometimes, he himself does not understand it, but it will come out in time. I ask that you be patient with him, and to please not do things that make his task harder.' His task. 'You mean watching me? I haven't, until tonight. I got fed up Master Splinter. He is taking this way too seriously. Casey didn't expect me to go a whole month without friends and dressing like a nun.' He laughed softly. 'Perhaps not, but maybe you did some things tonight to push my son to anger. The boy, for example. ' He said suggestively. I sighed. 'He's not my boyfriend Sensei. Today was the first time I even talked to him, and honestly I probably won't again. That is, if he's even brave enough to look me in the eyes after tonight. Raphael scared the wits out of him. But maybe the clothes were a little rebellious, even for me.' I looked down at my outfit. I had paired a black bandeau top and a white band tee with the sides cut out, with a pair of black tights, and my black Vans. My Yankees ball cap turned backwards on my head and a red plaid flannel completed the look. It had started around my waist at the arcade, and I had wound up putting it on at the movies when Elijah had tried putting his arm around my shoulders. Splinter patted my hand and rose, bidding me goodnight and asking me to think about what he had said. After the curtain to his room was closed, I got up and went into Mikey's room. He was spinning in a computer chair and trying to shoot paper balls into his wastebasket. I landed face first on his bed and groaned. Twisting my head towards him and blowing the hair out of my eyes I said, 'Can I sleep in here tonight? I miss Casey, and I had a nightmare last night, but I don't want to bug him halfway through his honeymoon.' Throwing a ball of paper at my head and missing he said, 'Sure, but I'm sleeping on the bed. You don't get privileges after you almost gave all of us a heart attack, and Raph was biting our heads off for not knowing where you were. I love you Ells, but that was totally not cool.' I curled up in a ball. 'I know, believe me. I'm sorry and it will never happen again, promise. I'm gonna go change. I'll be right back.' I walked down the hall to Raph's room to get my pajamas, and then to the bathroom to brush my teeth and change. When I was done I started back to Mikey's room when I heard music coming from the dojo. I paused, listening. The music was louder than usual, but I could still hear Raphael's grunts and his fists hitting the bag rapidly. Then a yell of frustration, and silence. I speed-walked the rest of the way to the bedroom. He was sitting on the bed, two bowls of popcorn waiting, and Fast Five cued up on his TV. I settled into the nest of blankets on the floor and he hit play. Before the credits rolled I was asleep.