Revelations of the Heart

And Then There Were Four.

Aella Jones, 16 years old
New York, New York.
Two weeks came and went. On my return home I was met with, of course, a party, and a clingy Mikey begging me to never leave him again. We had Skyped, but it 'wasn't enough' he complained. I also came home with a new haircut, that I conveniently didn't tell my brother about and hid under a hat for all of our video calls. Another girl on the trip had convinced me to 'just do it' after we bonded on the plane to D.C. over our shared love of classic horror movies and Nickelback. So we went and I got my hair cut shoulder length in the front and shorter in the back, along with a few emerald green streaks all the way through. The girl, Nicole, and I had promised to stay friends at school. Turns out she was kind of a loner too. It felt good to finally have a friend besides those of the reptilian nature. I had brought all of them a keychain with the White House on it, because they all had keys to a different vehicle, and April a little snow globe for her apartment. Once my brother got over my new hair, he accepted the ball cap I bought him with a hug, saying he missed me, and that they all had news for me. They hadn't told me while I was gone because they didn't want to upset me. That first of all, Splinter would be sending Leonardo to Central America for a year. Now that things had calmed down he thought Leo could use some time to himself, to meditate and train alone, to be a better leader, and to help where he would be needed, in the shadows of course. That alone was heartbreaking, but then came the big one. April and Casey had gotten engaged. They wanted to have a shotgun wedding before Leo left, and would I be the maid of honor? I was stunned. I loved April. She made Casey happy, and she readily accepted that I was part of the deal from the get go. But I wasn't ready for us to be a family, was I? My heart started to pound, blood rushing to my head and drowning out the voices around me. I could see mouths moving, concerned looks, and then I was being pushed into a chair and fanned with a magazine. I couldn't breathe, and my brain registered that i was having a panic attack. And then I heard Raph yell something about water. I thought about green eyes, and evened my breaths, counting them the same way Raph counted pushups. Mikey appeared with a cup of ice water and I took it from him, drinking deeply before coming back to the present. Casey was asking if I was ok. I took a deep breath, replying, 'Yeah. Yeah I'm great. That's awesome news. I'm so happy, and of course I'll be your maid of honor. Who else would? Mikey?' Everyone looked relieved. 'Hey I think I'd look great in a dress for your information.' He struck a dramatic pose, causing everyone to laugh. 'Good, good. For a minute there I thought you were mad,' Casey said. I scoffed. 'Why would I be mad. You guys deserve each other and you deserve to be happy. I just ask that when I find the right guy to make me happy that you take it as chill as I am. You know, don't go rearranging his face, cause there's a chance I'll actually like it. I'm gonna go upstairs and unpack a little before dinner, ok? I'll see you guys later.' This was Friday, and Leonardo was supposed to leave on the following Thursday, slipping into the cargo hold of a plane, so we had to get busy quick on the wedding. Turns out Vern had figured out people would pay big bucks to have 'The Falcon' officiate their ceremonies so he had obtained a liscense and agreed to do this one for the price of food and alcohol. Then there was the hard work: convincing April that the umpteenth dress she tried on didn't make her look fat, or washed out, or trashy. She was fine with having a sewer wedding, without bells and whistles, but by God she was going to have a pretty dress and a honeymoon. They made plans to leave right after the wedding to Hawaii for a month, all expenses paid thanks to Donnie's computer finesse. By which I mean he hacked their way into somebody else's vacation. It was technically wrong, but they honestly couldn't care less. They were sickeningly in love, and the rest of us avoided them as much as possible. Unfortunately I couldn't get out of wearing a dress. April insisted, making me try on dress after dress after school until I was exhausted. She finally settled on a blush colored knee length off the shoulder dress with a fitted bodice, and a flared skirt. My saving grace was that I didn't have to wear heels, instead opting for matching ballet flats. Also unfortunate was the fact that of course, Raphael was Casey's best man, which meant we would walk up the aisle first together. I got nervous just thinking about it. I had done my best to avoid him above all, too afraid of what I would see if I looked him in the eyes, but before I knew it the big day came and it was no longer an option. The lair was beautiful. Mikey had went all out, stringing fairy lights everywhere and spreading white petals along the path to the altar. There was a speaker set up with the wedding march cued up as well as some other music for later. The boys all wore neckties in their signature colors, and Vern was in a smart grey suit. My brother came out of Raph's room in a white button down and black slacks, the closest I had ever seen him to wearing a suit. He went and stood on the left of Vern and waited with a goofy smile on his face. Mikey hit the music, and I met Raph in the middle. He cleared his throat, and held out his arm for me to take, leading me slowly from the entrance of the lair to the altar. I was struggling to keep my breathing even, and then he spoke. 'You look good, shorty.' A pause, and then, 'You've been avoiding me. I'm not askin', I'm tellin', and I don't want an explanation. I just want you to know that I know. And I liked the picture, by the way.' He winked down at me, and then we were at the altar, taking our places on either side. The bridal music cued and April appeared on the arm of Splinter. She was gorgeous, and I saw my brother blink tears away. It made me want to cry. April had decided on a beautiful backless AND strapless mermaid style gown. Her hair was curled and piled on top of her head and a veil was keeping it pinned in place. When they made it to the altar, Splinter gave her a pat on the arm and took his seat. I took her bouquet and stepped back, briefly glancing at Raph. He was looking straight past April at me. He didn't look away, even though he was caught. I could feel my cheeks burning and averted my eyes, tuning in to what Vern was saying. 'For better or worse, as long as you both shall live?' April said 'I do.' She and Casey turned to take the rings from us and exchanged them as Vern said, 'You may now kiss the bride.' Casey dipped April and kissed her deeply, and Mikey wolf whistled as the rest of us clapped. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Raph watching me again, and I almost said something, but Mikey came up beside me, wiping a fake tear from his eye and leading me to the kitchen. 'I saw you looked uncomfortable. Is there something you want to tell me about between you and my brother?' My eyes widened and he grinned like the cat that got the cream. 'I knew it! I so knew something happened. We are going to my room and you are gonna tell me everything. Grab those chips.' He grabbed an armful of sub sandwiches and a two litre and headed down the hall. I followed suit reluctantly. When I got there he already had a sub in his mouth and an expectant look on his face sitting cross legged on the floor. 'Spill,' he said through a mouthful of turkey and cheese. I sighed. 'There's not much to spill. He saw a drawing I did right before my Washington trip and it was a little embarrassing. That's all.' I picked at a ham and Swiss as I spoke. 'Well what was the drawing of? Why would it have been embarrassing? You always draw flowers and stuff.' He opened a bag of chips. I paused. 'It was a drawing of him. A very DETAILED drawing of him. Like scars and stuff. I didn't even realize I paid that much attention to him until I did it. And just now he told me he LIKED it, so if there was any doubt he saw it its gone now. I'm so screwed. Now I have to live here while my brother is in Hawaii and I can't stand to look Raph in the face.' I flopped back onto his bed and sighed dramatically. 'I'll have to become a hermit. Hiding away in Leo's room the entire time Casey is gone.' He looked at me quizzically. 'Didn't they tell you? Raph is taking Leo's room and you're staying in Raph's. He insisted, something about Leo's being more private and since he's the second oldest he deserves it. I think it's a crock but what can you do?' I shot up. 'What can I do? I'm gonna tell him the deal was I got Leo's room because it IS more private and hello, I'm a GIRL. I want the privacy.' He put his hands up. 'Don't shoot the messenger Sweets, take it up with Raph. But he was pretty adamant.' I huffed. 'I will. But not right now. Later, after Case and April leave. I don't want to spoil their fun.' We stayed in his room a little longer, talking and finishing the food. When the music outside got quiet, we emerged to throw away our trash and help clean up. Casey and April were slow dancing alone in the fairy lights, staring into each other's eyes. Splinter must have gone to his room cause I didn't see him. Leo and Donnie were in the kitchen, clearing away the mess, and Vern and Raph were nowhere to be seen. Oh well. I'd deal with him later. We helped finish cleaning up and the newlyweds came to bid us goodnight. They were leaving first thing the next morning and April wanted to get some rest. Just then Raph came back in, saying Vern got home alright. He fist bumped Casey and wished them a safe trip before heading into the dojo and closing the doors. Mikey looked at me and nodded his head. I quickly hugged Casey and April, making them promise to call when they landed, and followed Raph. He was wailing on the punching bag, and I almost chickened out, but I steeled my nerves. I stood against the wall for a minute like I always did, trying to think of what to say, when he suddenly stopped hitting the bag, holding it still with one hand. 'I know you're there Aella. I always know you're there.' I froze. 'You do?' He turned to face me. 'Yeah. I can smell you every time. Vanilla, sometimes coconut.' I blushed, then remembered I was on a mission. 'We need to talk, Raphael. I had a deal for Leo's room while Casey's out of town, but Mikey just informed me that that's changed. Why wasn't I asked? I'm a girl. I need my privacy, and I'm also in school, and Leo's room is the farthest away from all the noise in the lair. Can I please have his room? Just for a month?' He paused as if thinking. 'No.' He fiddled with his wraps. I was stunned. 'Why? It's just for a month.' His jaw twitched in annoyance. Good. 'Because you made that deal with Leo, and while Leo is gone I'm in charge, per Master Splinter, as well as in charge of you per your brother. So I get Leo's room, and you can take mine, or you can sleep on the couch. Your choice.' He went back to hitting the bag and I left, slamming the door closed. I went straight to Raph's room, and sure enough the bags I had personally put in Leo's room were now in Raph's. Who did he think he was? Mikey peeked his head in. Seeing the look on my face he said 'I take it it didn't go well.'

Raphael, same day.
After Aella left the dojo, I yelled in frustration and threw a punch so hard it split the bag. 'Damn,'. Splinter was gonna kill me. But God, she pissed me off and turned me on at the same time. I had just used my temporary leadership as an excuse. The real reason I wanted her in my room is because the thought of her sleeping in Leo's bed, even alone, getting her amazing scent all over his sheets and having his scent linger on her for a month made me want to punch a brick wall. I hadn't washed my own sheets in almost a month because her scent still clung to them and I loved it. I wanted more of it. So when the month was up and she went back home it would be ingrained in everything I owned and I could drink it in whenever I wanted. It was perfect. She was perfect. The wedding had made thoughts cross my mind that never should have, and I stared longer and more openly than was wise, to the point I'm pretty sure Mikey had picked up on it. She was just so gorgeous in that little pink dress, with her shoulders on display and April's bouquet of flowers in hand. I wasn't sure when or how it had happened, but I was pretty sure I had feelings for the human. I was getting jealous, and feeling territorial even though logically I knew she didn't belong to me. When she went into Mikey's room with him after the ceremony it hurt. It didn't matter to me that they were just friends. That sketch had lit a fire in me, a hope that hadn't ever been there before. For the first time I actually regretted not saving that mutagen a year ago. I left the dojo, walking past my room, listening intently until I heard soft breathing noises. Something in my chest flared, and I walked to Leo's room where he was finishing his preparations to leave. He had already said his goodbyes, and was gonna stow away on a private flight that night. He looked up when I walked in. 'I heard that yell all the way back here. You good?' I waited a minute and then said 'Yeah. You?' He didn't answer. I knew he wasn't. He and I clashed constantly but he was still my brother. We both knew the real reason Sensei was sending him away. Splinter didn't think he would be around much longer, and he wanted Leo to truly be prepared to take up the proverbial mantle. The world would always need saving. He zipped up the bag and cleared his throat. 'You know, you wait too long and she'll be gone. She's not gonna wait around forever.' The blood pounded in my ears. 'I know. Be careful brother, and good luck.' He nodded, and then he was gone, and I was alone.