Clash (Our Story)

Chapter 12

I was in Zack's car. That came as a shock to me because he never cared to mention owning a car before. Heck I didn't even know he drives.

'Where are we going?', I asked, a sniffle following.

'You'll see.', he replied with a wide smile making his hazel eyes squint.

They say curiosity killed the cat, and it really was killing me: I was dying to know where he was taking me.

I then let out a sigh in frustration as he chuckled under his breath.

After a fifteen minute car ride, he pulled over and I couldn't believe my eyes.

We were at the beach.

I knew about this beach, but couldn't go for I didn't own a car and walking there wasn't an option.

I had mentioned to Zack how much I love the sea and how watching the crashing waves calms me down. But, never would I have thought he would bring me there.

I got out of the car in slow steps as I took in the view.

The sun was shining its sparkling rays as the sand looked like diamonds underneath the intense light. The sea was emerald colored, reflecting the sun light in terrific blues.

I was awestruck in my place when Zack sneaked his hand into mine, intertwining them.

I was on the verge of tears, happy ones. I knew I didn't deserve him.

'Thank you, Zack.', I said as I lifted our interlocked hands and left a kiss on his hand.

His face turned red in response.

He then cleared his throat and said,
'Don't mention it.'

A leap of faith. Here we go. I can't keep on hiding myself from him any longer.

'Zack-'

I was about to tell him everything about my complicated life when my phone rang, interrupting me.

I glanced at the contact to find that it was an unknown number.

I ignored it and was about to continue talking when it rang again.

What if it was something important?

On that note, I said,
'Sorry, I gotta take this.'

Zack nodded.

I then scurried a distance away to pick up the call.

'Hello?'

'Hello, this is 'Your Health Medical Hospital', is this Ms. Rachel Anderson?'

'Yes, speaking.', I said, getting antsy.

'Your father, Mr. Mike Anderson, has been admitted to the hospital.'

That was when my hand's grip got weak and the phone slipped right through, hitting the sand. To say I was panicking was an understatement. My heart was beating so loud in my ears that I couldn't hear the sound of the waves nearby anymore.

Did it actually get to that? Did that woman hurt him?

The mere thought terrified me.

He was almost a non-existent father figure to me but I still cared. Maybe all he did was buy me sweets when I was a little child, but I still cared. I still cared and I couldn't stomach the thought of losing him. He was my dad at the end of the day.

I picked up my phone from the sand and ran in wide steps towards Zack, who was staring calmly at the sea.

'Zack, I need to go.', I said quickly and then started running towards the street like a crazy person to call a cab. I was desperate to get there as soon as I can and make sure my dad was okay. They had refused to tell me over the phone what happened so I was even more freaked out.

I wasn't thinking straight as I was about to leave him before he even responded.

'Wait!', he then shouted out from behind me.

I stopped.

'Don't go.', he pleaded.

Why did everything have to be so hard? Why was my life so hard? I have to always think anything a hundred times over while other people would do it in the blink of an eye: Any other girl would run into Zack's arms while I had to hesitate. Why couldn't I have that luxury?

'I don't have time to explain. Sorry.', I replied, acting like it didn't hurt to be saying that.

I lied. I could have told him and he would have been supportive, but I chose not to. Despite how much I needed him, I couldn't bring myself to talk or mention that woman to him or my never sober dad after all. How could I? I didn't want to taint the graceful picture he painted of me in his head.

I was grateful for the phone call interrupting us. It was like a wake up call because I knew I would have regretted telling him. I wouldn't have been able to get a wink of sleep and I would have been in constant worry about what he thought of me.

I turned my head to see him staring at the sand, disheartened.

My heart ached.

He must hate me.

I am sorry, Zack. I am sorry I am not strong enough. I ended up hurting you because I was scared of getting hurt.

He deserved someone better than me. He deserved someone who wouldn't run away from him after he did the nicest thing ever, someone who was mentally available to listen to all of his problems and pat him on the back, and, most of all, someone good enough for him. That someone wasn't me.

I am sorry. I should have realized that earlier and not let myself dream the impossible.

I kept apologizing to him in my head, tears filling my eyes like a bucket, on my way to the hospital in the cab.

I wish I knew then that that was the last I was going to see of Zack for a while. I wish I knew that what I did was irreversible and that I had ruined all chances of me ever being happy. I wish I knew that life would be unbearably hard without him in it. I wish I knew.

-----End Of Chapter 12-----

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