You took my heart, could I please have it back?

[32] You took my heart, could I please have it back?

.:Recap:.

I groaned a little and held my hands to my head, wishing the pain would stop. I felt my coat and shoes being removed, and I instantly felt more comfortable on the soft surface. Then I felt a hand, not James', rest against my forehead, presumably checking to see if I was too hot. Then the hand was taken away again and I could see white spots in front of my eyes.

Knowing I was going to pass out at any second, I shut my eyes and willed for the darkness to take over me.

.:Story Start:.

When I awoke again, I was on a comfortable bed, in different surroundings. The figure by my side was a medical lady from school, who used to be a nurse. She was writing on a clipboard as I took in my surroundings.

To my relief, I wasn't in a hospital. Out of the window, I could see a second cabin, and a few people from my year running around playing in the snow; we were back at the dorms. I was presumably in the medical cabin which joined onto the dining cabin.

The lady spoke to me for a while, asking me questions, and then she went away again. When she came back, she told me I would have to stay here overnight and then see how I was in the morning. I shrugged, saying I didn't mind, and she left again.

As I sat all alone in the silence, I wondered if Alex had heard what had happened and would visit me. I worked out that probably everyone knew what had happened - word travelled fast when being carried by school kids - but after a few hours, he still didn't visit.

I didn't even notice the tears fall from my eyes until I went into the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. I tried to wipe them away, but it didn't work. I knew Alex cared for me, I knew it...so why didn't he visit? Maybe he wasn't allowed? Or maybe he held a hard grudge against me?

Sobbing, I left the bathroom, the room swaying around me. I collapsed into bed and drank a glass of water, before curling into a ball on the bed and closing my eyes tightly. That was the last thing I remembered before falling asleep again.

~*~*~

The next day, the lady said I was probably going to be OK but I might feel dizzy sometimes. She told me that, if I did, I would have to tell someone and have some water. Yeah, right, I was going to tell someone...they'd call me a wimp and ignore me.

However, now I was feeling better, I could think clearly about everything that had happened. Alex had stopped talking to me, James had helped me, and neither of them had visited me. I felt hurt, and more alone than ever. I was grateful for James for helping me, but upset that he didn't visit.

But more than anything, I was upset about my predicament with Alex. What if we didn't make friends again? What if he hated me forever? The thought was too much to bear. I had to get him back, I had to. He was my best friend; my rock. Without him, I was lost.

And so I formulated a plan.

I had to convince myself I hated James so that nothing gave me away when I was apologizing to Alex. If I didn't truly hate him then Alex was sure to find out and things would backfire again. So now, I actually wanted him to be bipolar again, for the first time.

But first I wanted to say thank you to James. He had been so nice to me yesterday after I hit my head, and had said nothing about what Nicola told him, and for that I was grateful. So when I was allowed out of this blasted place, I would find him, say thanks, and then hope that he was bipolar again so I could apologize to Alex.

In theory, this would work, as James was always being bipolar. In practise, I knew there would be a lot of problems once I'd started. Like, how do I get either James or Alex by themselves? How did I know if Alex would even forgive me? What if I got really embarrassed when I was with James and cocked it up completely?