Regret//

1.

You are a trashy white girl with horrible parents and horrible education, that's because you and your boyfriend..Carl Gallagher..but everyone calls him white boy carl.  He and you have been doing crime like arson,stealing,fighting,drugs,underaged drinking,etc for a year now. You guys have been in Juvie constantly because of your crimes. You grew up with a mom and dad that did crime when they were teenagers so of course it's a gene. Carl just grew up with a alcoholic,drug addict dad and a mom that ran off. Of course of his dad frank he is the way he is. You practically live with All the Gallaghers because your dad or mom don't take care of you..all they do if abuse you. They have been sent to jail once for there actions towards you but that has not changed them. All they wanted to do was sex,drugs,and alcohol. They were literally sex addicts. They almost did it every night it felt so good to them. They would even drink and watch TV why doing it. You've seen it all. Every once a week you go back to your trashy front  yard house and pack some clean clothes and a few other things. You live at the Gallaghers 24/7. You already asked your dad and mom if Fiona could sign a paper to take you in but they said no even though Fiona was fine with it. You guys were practically addicted to stealing,drinking,and drugs. You did it every day and even some nights you would sneak out and steal something from some lady's purse that was walking down a alley at night. You and Carl surprisingly rarely had sex which was surprising since you both are literal criminals and criminals usually have sex when they get done with we're missing..right?. You were over at the Gallaghers. You were upstairs in the shared boys room smoking with Carl and blasting rap music why Fiona..carls biggest sister  that took care of everyone, Lip..carls big brother who was the smartest..and Ian..carls second older brother that was gay and was dating a Milkovich were all downstairs,watching there 1 nightly show. There was also Debbie..they teen mom lesbian..Liam, who seems to be the clearest and simplest in the family..and as you thought of it....Frank..the alcoholic,Drug addict dad who was almost  never around half of the time. He was either out doing drugs,hitting up older women,or in the hospital. They only time he ever cared for his children if was he wanted money off of them. He would bribe them and say things like ' I really love you' and ' I'll buy you anything you want'.

You were doing a joint. You were sitting besides Ian's bed as high as a kite. All you could see was  dizziness and colored twirly colors. All you smelt was weed. All that room smelt like was weed and it smelt so good to you. Carl was sitting against the wall by his bed on Cloud 9. You were starting to think he was higher than you. He was holding the joint in his fingers why he blew out the smoke. You breathed in the amazing smell of that smoke. You guys had some small talk off and on about what you guys were gonna do after smoking but otherwise you too just sat there smoking and blasting music.

Fiona,Lip, and Ian were all downstairs trying to watch there show peacefully but kept hearing the slight sound of the beating music echoing upstairs through the door and out the walls that lead downstairs. They all sat there silently trying to focus. Lip was staring at the TV thinking about if he should go up there and ask you guys to turn done the music. He got up and hopped over the couch quickly and hustled up the stairs. Fiona watched him walk down the hall quickly. You couldn't hear his loud footsteps come up the stairs because of the music and how high you were. You were barely focusing on life and how much you were losing it. Your eyes were closed as you thought real. You stayed thinking about Carl and the future you would have with him and how you too should stop crime but you could dream and dream about stopping, you wouldn't. You were on it feels like 100 roads at a time why you thought about the future. With Carl,stopping crime,having kids,buying a house,you and your parents getting sober,getting a new house with your parents,going back to school,getting a job. You were having small scenarios about it all in each second. You were having a good time until you were interrupted and startled by lip bashing in the room. You jerked awake and  barely saw lip standing at the door way holding the doorknob. You couldn't see him real well because of the dizziness and the colors but you could see his red,vainy face. You could tell he was angry.

" Jesus Christ please turn the music down" Lip said as he glanced at you and Carl. You slowly turned your head to look at Carl that was already looking at you. You smirked at him before looking back at lip slowly.

" Why" you asked softly as your eyes closed during the sentence.

" Because me and everyone are trying to watch something" Lip said as he stared at you. He stared at you like you were crazy.

" So" you said softly as you looked down slowly. Lip looked at Carl quickly. Carl looked at lip and stayed silent for a second. Lip was giving Carl that 'look'. He looked mad and annoyed at the same time. Carl stared at Lip with his head down a bit. All lip could see of his second little brother was red eyes and a ruined life.

" Fine" Carl said softly as he slowly got up. He could barely stand up,he couldn't see anything but twirly colors and a road leading to a hell life if it already isn't one. Carl hung on to the side of his bed why he reached over and clicked the small black button on the giant speaker that turned it down. He kept clicking it until he was satisfied with the volume. He looked at lip slowly after he stopped clicking it. He glanced at lip as he slowly sat down,hanging on to the side of his bed. He quickly slid down the wall. Lip looked at you both high as a kite motherfuckers In worry. He gave you one last stare before slowly closing the door. You stared intensely at the door waiting for the click sound. Once you heard the door click you immediately got up and walked over to the big Speaker and clicked the button Intensely until you were satisfied with how loud it was. You looked at Carl and laughed  as you knew lip would come back again to turn it off completely as he done before. Carl giggled as he drank his Vodka in his brown sweated wet bag. You laughed so hard that you bumped into carls dresser and fell onto Ian's bed. You laughed and started to sound like a old grandpa on life support as you held your stomach. Carl giggled as he held the Vodka in his hand as he stared at you. He smiled as he watched you laugh until you ran out of breath and stopped. In your brain and and eyes you we're having the best time of your life but if your 6 year old self saw you now..she would be disappointed in you and have what you become. You stared at the ceiling and started to think about the future again until you eventually fell asleep. Carl was already asleep before you. He fell over with the vodka in his hand and landed on the floor. The Vodka spilled all over the floor as he held it in his hand. Your highness took you into a twirly,colorful world that all had in it was everything you wanted. No  childhood trauma,friends,sober parents,good houses,dream job,a kid,and just a happy life with your boyfriend...Carl Fuckin Gallagher.