𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒎𝒆 - 𝑻𝒉𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒔 𝑹𝒂𝒈𝒈𝒊

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E L E N A

December 24th 2016

I'm spending Christmas eve with my Dad and Samantha. Something I'm not looking forward to. I just want to stay here, with my mom and family from her side. She makes my hair in a little bun while I look in the mirror. "Mom, Samantha hates me. I don't want to got there". I wear a mint green dress with glitter, but I feel like cotton candy. "Honey, she does not hate you, come on let's go".

"Wow Elena, you look... different, in a good way", my dad looks smiling at me, but I see in his brown eyes that he not likes it. The table is set with candles, who smell like wet dog, just like the house. The orange napkins totally not give off the Christmas vibe. "Diner is ready", Samantha the thin blond lady, is wearing a long black dress. I bet she wants to get barried in that thing, but for the first time in ages she doesn't look like a women with an eating disorder.

"You want extra sauce", Samantha looks at me, I nod friendly. A drop of dark red sauce lands on my plate. I really hate it here, the vibe is awkward. And from the first moment I got in this house in the first time, I knew it was a place I didn't like to come. But I'm a 16 years old girl, what can I do?

Thomas is making himself ready for the pre-listening party from MAMMAMIA. His eyes look beautiful with the make-up he is wearing, although his eyes are always beautiful. The other look as beautiful as Thomas, in a red theme. "You look hot", I wrap my arms around my boyfriend's neck and look at us in the mirror. "Elena my make-up!", he says after I place a kiss on his cheek. I do it again and he sighs annoyed, so I walk away.

I'm back stage, waiting for the band to perform MAMMAMIA. Giorgia and I watch waiting to our guys while the audience is yelling, Veronice seems a little unintressed and plays a game on her phone. I ignore it, she joined the band so many times when they were going to gigs, she has seen it all.

They performed, they performed MAMMAMIA for the very first time. And it was hot. It was hot as fucked. Even though Damiano sang it I could hear Thomas say those things to me in my head. They are now performing their songs 'ZITTI E BUONI' and 'I WANNA BE YOUR SLAVE'. Giorgia is searching through Damiano his stuff, looking for I have no idea.

An anonymous number is calling me. I raise my eyebrow and pick up. "Hello, it's Elena Colombo", I hear noise in the background. "Hello Elena", when I hear my dad his voice, it feels like my heart stops beating. "Dad, Thomas said that I don't want to talk to you anymore". He laughs, evil, but dumb.

"I just want to know why, I'm your father Elena, and I have the right to see you". "You seriously ask me why? Well maybe because you ruined my life. When you and mom broke up, you became a person I didn't know, and you still are. A cold person with no heart", tears come up in my eyes, but my anger pushes it away. "Dad, respect my choice, that is the only good thing you can do right now, leave me alone", before my dad says something I hang up.

With my hands I squeeze in the chair, to avoid crying. "Who was that?", Giorgia walks in the room. I sigh, deep. "My d-dad". My blood boils. "But I thought you didn't want to see him again". I nod the the girl in front of me. "I don't, but he just did what he wanted".

Talking to Giorgia about it felt good. I fly into Thomas his arms when I return to backstage. "I loved it so much baby", I wrap my legs around his waist and hug him tight. I just needed this hug right now. Thomas whispers in my ear, "tell me your limit and we will cross the line again". It gives me chills, I smile at my boyfriend.

On the way back to the hotel, I don't talk much. While everyone is busy talking about their new song, I quiety hum the song and stare out of the window of the little bus. I think about the conversation with my dad, his rude and disrespectful behavior. I just want him to leave me, and understand why I act this way.

"Baby what's wrong", Thomas turns his head my way and strokes my leg, while I stare straight to the road, avoiding the new tears. "Elena?", his lips touch my cheek and turn my head towards him. "My dad called". Thomas looks wide-eyed at me, squeezing my leg. "What the actual fuck. I'm gonna call him, this is not okay". He searches for his phone while Giorgia smiles at me.

The other stay quiet. They know about my dad, and they know I don't want to see him. "Thommy no, leave it", I pull his phone away. "No baby, he shouldn't be so disrespectful. I want to protect you, let me please help". "That is not gonna help, if you want to help, just don't talk about it anymore".

He disagrees with me, I see it in his eyes. He wants to help me, and I get it, he is worried. But helping means trouble, and I don't want my boyfriend and dad fight with each other. I have to let it go, maybe in a few months I'll be ready to have a normal conversation with my dad, like normal daughter and fathers have. But I don't really think the situation I'm in with my dad isn't normal at all.

"Guys, stop. It's all about me, again. Stop about it, let's talk about MAMMAMIA", I say and I see all the faces light up in a second. I make the moan noise that Damiano makes in the song. "Maybe we need a new singer", Ethan, who is driving finally says something. "Well thank u", Damiano gives the drummer the holy finger.  

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oh mama mammamia how sweet can he be?