Fighting our demons together

Chapter 15

Carlos' caresses and the delicate kisses he was leaving on his cheek woke TK up and made him smile. He turned in bed and opened his eyes, he loved to wake up and meet Carlos' dark eyes, his smile, and those hands that always protected him.

He still shuddered remembering that not long ago he had thought he had died, he had believed that one day Carlos would wake up alone in that bed because the tumor had won the war.

But there they were, the two of them in his bed, in their shelter under the sheets, hugging, smiling, as if nothing had happened, or rather, seeing what had happened as a bad memory that was left behind.

TK reached up and caressed Carlos' cheek. The policeman's smile widened even more. He must have been dreaming because TK thought Carlos' face lit up.

"Good morning," Carlos whispered. "Ready to get back to your life?"

He had almost forgotten. They had marked it on the calendar and had been crossing off the days. It was time to get back to the barracks, back to work, back to being a paramedic.

But now that the day had come, TK wasn't sure he was ready for it. For weeks, he had felt like a glass figure that could shatter into a thousand pieces at a touch.

Everyone had treated him differently, had stopped by to visit him, and TK had noticed that they looked at him differently, talked to him differently. He wasn't the same TK then and now that the day had come to be, he wasn't sure if he was ready for it.

He sat up and hugged his legs.

"TK, are you all right? You know what the doctor said, if you feel nauseous or dizzy...we can go to the ER and get you checked out."
"I'm dizzy, yes, and I'm nauseous yes," Carlos tensed hearing that already ready to get up and grab the car keys to take her husband to the hospital. "But it's about... I'm scared to death, babe. I don't know if I can do it, I don't know if I can go back to that life, I don't know if I'm that person."
"Baby, I assure you, you're the strongest person I've ever met in my entire life. You have overcome a terrible tumor, you have recovered, the doctor has said you are completely out of danger and you can go back to your normal life."
"I just don't know what my normal life is anymore." TK sobbed and let himself be hugged tightly by Carlos. "It's silly I know, there are no sequels, the doctor has said I'm fully recovered and it's only been a few weeks. But a part of me is afraid to try to resume that life and hurt myself, realize that I can't and that I have to start from scratch."

Carlos kissed her on the head and stroked her arm.

"If you have to start from scratch, I'm going to be with you every step of the way, your father is going to be there, my parents, Judd, and the others... you can't start from scratch because you have too many people who are going to help you be and do what you want and need."
"You all expect me to go back to being TK the paramedic who..."

Carlos turned him around and forced him to look him in the eye while still smiling.

"No one is going to ask you for anything. I was only asking you to live and you have. I don't care about the rest and I assure you that your father will be happy with the decision you make today. He has a son who is alive, who has survived the unthinkable. My husband has survived a nightmare."

TK blushed and answered Carlos' words by kneeling on the bed and giving him a tender, long kiss on the lips.

"Have I told you lately that I love you?"

Carlos wrinkled his nose and looked thoughtful, TK burst out laughing and jumped on top of him to start tickling him.

"Don't be so mean, I know I tell you I love you every day."