The Outrageous Rants Of A Muslimah

January 18th - I'm Tired of "Explaining" Myself (Rant)

January 18, 2013

6th of Rabi Al-Awwal, A.H. 1434

I'm Tired of "Explaining" Myself

As an American Muslim, I can only attempt to speak in part of my fellow American Muslims when it comes to this subject. I think everyone knows about 9/11. It was a terrible tragedy that took the lives of more than a thousand Americans. It's a sensitive subject for me and definitely many others. 

On September 11, 2001, I had just turned 5. All I was worried about back then was barbie dolls and polly pocket, barely aware of what happened. Yet by the time I turned 8 or 9, I learned of the anger that some Americans seemed to harbor toward Muslims. I couldn't understand it. In my mind I was thinking, "I'm American, my parents are American, their parents are American, and so on and so forth. So why are they singling me out?"

At some point I realized it was because I was lucky enough to be raised on this amazing religion called Islam.

Were they jealous? No, that wasn't it.

It's all because the people who caused the deaths of all of those people were supposed to be "Muslim" and in many peoples eyes, they saw Muslims as some kind of threat to society.

It hurt my feelings, it stressed me out, and it made me wonder if there was something wrong with my religion.

Can you believe that?

Their hate made me doubt Islam and I was only a child, still learning. But my parents (may Allah bless them) have always made a point of not allowing us to blindly follow Islam.

They actually taught us why we love Allah and what Islam was down to the very core.

I never had a question that they couldn't find a proper answer to and all of my confusion that came at the hands of people was put aside.

That is something I'll be grateful for as long as I'm alive. My parents showed me a love that only Allah can give and although I make mistakes, Allah is All-Forgiving. It literally hurts me to see so many other teenagers, friends, and family that have fallen off of the deen because they let other people convince them that what they believed was wrong.

 Because of 9/11, today as Muslims we constantly feel the need to explain ourselves to people who think a certain way about us or have a certain mindset that they've invented in their heads toward us.

Well guess what....I'm done with that.

I'm cool with explaining my religion and who I am as a Muslim if someone asks me with a certain amount of respect. That's all unicorns and butterflies in my book.

On the other hand, if you have already decided in your mind that I'm a terrible person just because I'm Muslim, why the hell are you talking to me? Get out of my face with that shiz.

I've recently decided that I have no reason to argue with the people who hate me and my religion.

I will not let anyone make me feel bad because I don't fit their criterior of a free woman or a woman with a mind of her own.

How about you just have a seat and try that again.

I am 16 years old and I know what I want from life.

Being free is not sexualizing myself to fit this society's standards. Being free is not being able to drink alcohol when I turn 21. Being free is not doing drugs to ease the pain of being told that I'm not good enough. Being free is not perfecting the art of make up because of the way people will view me when I leave my home. Being free is not disrespecting my body and letting guys have their way with me at the sound of even the slightest compliment. And being free, my dear friends, is not following the words of men but the words of God.

And another thing...

I should not have to say that I'm not a terrorist.

Do we not realize that the more we feel the need to say stuff like that, the more people decide to associate "Islam" and "terrorism".  I'm not going to bring up terrorism in a common conversation. Why? Because that has absolutely NOTHING to do with me. You wanna talk about terrorism?

Then go find a real terrorist and educate yourself on that.

But my main point is I'm tired of apologizing. I feel terrible about the fact that so many lives were lost on 9/11 but I am in no way responsible for that incident, therefore why am I apologizing for the deeds of others?

If you want to talk about terrorism we can talk about how America has invaded (or let's use big words like 'terrorized') other countries....Or is that a little too much talk about terrorism for the day? -rolls eyes-

Yes, my family is American but being Muslim comes before everything else. And as a Muslim I am NOT proud of some of the things my coutry has done. Does that make me any less American? No, it does not. Do I hate America? No, it is where most of my ancestors were born. But it still hurts that my home country causes so much pain to others around the world yet pretends to be the victim all the time.

Another thing that hurts me is when people automatically look at bad people and blame their religion.

In 2012, a white man was the gunman to a shooting in a Colorado theater. He shot or otherwise injured 70 people.They didn't call him a terrorist.

Now be honest, if someone who had a "Muslim" name did the same thing, no matter what motives he may have had...they would have called him a terrorist.

Both are wrong and bad people! But why are they labeled differently according to race or religion?

The religion is not to be blamed. It is the evil in peoples hearts that should be held accountable.

Islam is perfect.

Muslims are not perfect but are people just like everyone else.

So the next time radical Muslims do some dumb sh--, don't call them Islamists. They are not "Islamists". They are Muslims who aren't following Islam correctly and try to manipulate the teachings of Islam to back their actions.

Do they even know what Islamist is supposed to mean? It's said to mean "A scholar who is knowledgable in Islamic studies"

So if you''re knowledgible when it comes to Islam, that makes you a radical nut job?

I'm so done with these people man...

~Jameelah L.