Turning Away Warm Bodies

Chapter Two: The Truth Hurts

(Photo: Jake Dolan)

  [Rose Amalia]

  "Get off the exit here." my father guides my mother through the high speeding traffic of the expressway.

  "Here?" she stumbles for the blinker, seeming to have forgotten everything about driving, exempt the majority of the basics.

  "Yes! Before you miss the—"

  A sudden jolt, just one mistake. It's never intended to mark the end of your life, but all too often does it happen. This reoccurring nightmare always has me waking up screaming, no matter how long it's been since it happened.

  "Rose!" my eyes would flash open to see Angela hovering over me, her entire expression twisted with pure terror.

  "Angela!" I'd almost shout, relieved to find myself awake, yet the nightmare still lingers in my head.

  Every night I'm brought back to that day, no matter how many years pass. It's as if my mind doesn't want me to forget it.

  "Was it-?"

  "Yeah..." my voice would always be soft, afraid to admit the bitter truth.

  She'd sigh heavily. "Why do you keep having these nightmares? I don't get it."

  "Neither do I." I'd lie.

  "I mean, it's been seven years, shouldn't you be over this by now?"

  I'd just shrug then curl up underneath the blankets. "Let's just drop it, okay?" I'd respond, closing my teary eyes to let the nightmare sink back into my vision.

  That's how it went back then. I'd wake up, screaming from the nightmares, she'd rush in the room, then I'd push her away. That was the last night I had that nightmare, for after she left, I finally came to realize the truth.

  I always thought that I was the cause of that accident, that if I hadn't been there, it would have never happened. I knew that if I hadn't been so stubborn, so set on being where I wanted to be, we wouldn't have been on that road at that time, and maybe, just maybe my parents could have lived to see another day. But people would always tell me that that wasn't true, that the event wasn't caused by me. I'd let their thoughts sink in, leaving me to believe that it wasn't my fault. It wasn't until that night that I realized that everything they were saying was complete bullshit.

  I have relived that day over and over again, every night for seven years. I know the story like the back of my hand, still it took me so long to realize that all of those comforting words were spoken just to make me feel better. Part of me feels remarkably stupid for taking so long to figure it out, for actually believing that fairy tale, that in all of the mess of that day, I was the only innocent figure.

  Two years ago, the truth finally came to me, and like that, the nightmares ceased to return, or so I'm led to believe.

~

  "Right here,"

  "Right where? I don't see anything!" I complain, confused.

  The girl groans. "Look where I'm pointing! Are you blind?!"

  I sigh heavily, trying not to blow up. "Stacey, how is insulting me going to help?"

  She's silent for a moment, taking in the thought. "You're right, sorry."

  "Apology accepted, now where is this mistake?"

  "You see this sentence right here?" I nod. "Well, the following sentence is the rest of the thought, but since the subject is not mentioned again-"