lana del rey imagines

ꨄ︎ wildfire ꨄ︎

i'll do my best never to turn into something
that burns, burns, burns

---

"Oh my gosh, mom, stop wanting to control my fucking life!"

"I don't want to control your life, Lana, I want you to see the bad decisions you're making!"

"And since when the hell do you care anyway!?"

A chill runs through your body when your girlfriend not only raises her voice but also hits the table with her hands. Your gaze travels to Rob, who has this sorry look on his face, like he's silently apologizing to you.

The arrival of spring made the idea of ​​meeting Lana's parents blossom and grow strongly with the passing days. But now you can't help but think that you should have let it wither.

Lunch was going well until her mother, Patricia, began asking questions about your relationship. They were things that every parent asks: how the two of you met, how long have you been together, things that you didn't mind answering. But then she brought up the subject of babies, pregnancies, family. You could tell how much Lana was holding back, but her patience ended when she began to be compared to her sister.

"When Chuck dated a woman you didn't say a damn thing! And now-"

"And now she's happily pregnant and you are not!" Her mother raises her voice too. "You're the oldest, you're supposed to have your own family by now! But instead, you keep making bad decisions, which doesn't surprise me, honestly."

There's this period of dead silence that not a single soul dares to break.

"What do you mean with that?" Lana asks harshly.

"You've made bad decisions your whole life. Drugs, alcohol, behaving like a rebellious girl who was just looking to get some attention."

"Jesus... A bad decision was to think that for a minute you were happy for me, but again I'm fucking wrong. And I'm fucking tired of this shit!"

Lana leaves the chair abruptly, grabbing her cigar box before disappearing from the dining room. Patty keeps eating like nothing happened at all, which completely baffles you. How can she look so nonchalant after such a tense and uncomfortable situation? And not only her, her husband as well.

"Excuse me." You say, leaving your seat.

"I think- I think she would like to be alone, Y/N," Rob comments.

"I'll be back in that case."

When you go out into the backyard, you walk slowly towards Lana, who's on her back, smoking.

"Babe? Are you okay?"

A wry giggle leaves her mouth and two seconds later she's turning around. There are tears in her pretty eyes and that makes your heart ache.

"Do I look fucking okay? Why do you ask such stupid things if you know the answer already!?"

Lana never talks to you like this, almost screaming, upset, taking her anger out on you. A part of you feels that you deserve it, after all it was your idea and only yours to do this. And another part knows that this is not your girlfriend talking but her pain, her anger, all the negative stuff that only God knows how long she has been dealing with.

That breaks your heart, knowing that there are things that she refuses to talk about or share with you - things that hurt her in silence.