Chapter 15: Before You Go

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I stood there awestruck, as I stood frozen were I was. I started calling his name but there was no response. I had already called the nurses from a remote thingy. 3 nurses, one of them nurse Jones, came in rushing as they put on the heart monitor and it was beating slow. I went into extreme shock.

One of them came and gave him oxygen, the other unbuttoned his shirt as she gave him CPR and nurse Jones seemed to call someone, probably Julie and then he asked me.

"I know its traumatizing what happened but can you tell me what happened?" he asked me.

"One second we were having fun the next he told me he wasn't feeling well and he collapsed. Is he alright? Tell me he's alright." I begged him now tears strolling down my face.

"He's waking up again but you only have one hour until.." and she stopped there looking down. I took my shaking hands infront of my face as I stepped out of the room crying not knowing why.

Why did I step out of the room? I had to be there. Would he wake up. And at that moment I bumped into Dr. Peters coming in rushing. She looked at me half heartidly as she continued walking and I went right after her. And as I arrived there I saw him, dark bags under his eyes, eyes red, skin whiter than Edward Cullen's..... I quickly dried my tears away to give him courage

"Hey Lucas" Dr. Peters said as she went to check some things

"Hey" he said smiling and I was surprised by his reaction. He didn't seem at all scared. Not one bit. He seemed happy.

"You only have approximatley 40 minutes before total blackout. You will still be aware of your surroundings just not able to see. I'm sorry Lucas" with that I'm sorry I turned away clutching my stomach feeling naesous.

"Can you give us some time alone" he muttered to the nurses as one by one they filed out.

"Hey Lovebird" he called out "Stay please. I want you here" he patted the side of the bed that he left for me. I went running to that side of the bed as I hugged him close

"You can't leave me, you understand? I can't live without you. Please. Just hold on ok? You'll be ok in a few minutes. Just-" i stopped there unable to continue.

"Lovebird, I can't. I won't leave you though." He said as he stroked my hair and kissed me. "I will never leave you.  You have to promise me that when I'm gonna you look in the cupboard next to your bedside table."

"Please don't talk like that" I pleaded unable to cry anymore. I rested my head on his chest, keeping my ear pressed to his chest just so I could make sure his heart was beating.

Lucas than took off a locket from around his neck and as he opened my palm he handed it to me, closed my fingers again and kissed my knuckles.

"Take this. Just a reminder when I'm gone that our story is not over. It's only getting started." Now his smile grew wider as he smiled at me drying my tears with his thumb.

"No I don't want it. Give it to me when you're 80 and are too old to stay alive" I said unaware of what was happening and what I was saying. He then without thinking, in my shock, took it from my hand but after some time put it on me.

"You know I love you right?" He said looking at the locket happily

"Yeah I know. I love you too and I don't know what I'm gonna do without you. I can never love again and I won't even try" I said unable to hold more tears back.

At that moment Julie and Nurse Jones entered the room. And gestured towards him, he nodded and after some time I understood what they meant and I said.

"Probably Alex and Brooke arrived by now. I'll go check on them" and I kissed him on the forehead as I left the room. There, next to the door, stood Brooke and Alex wearing their prom dresses which made me aware of my own. Before they could ask a question I said

"I'm fine, you guys"

"No, stop that. No, you're not fine, ok? The love of your life is dying before your eyes. Don't act like you are cause you're not. But we're here. And we will help you now and forever"

And with that I hugged them both and with a chocked voice muttered

"I don't know what I'll do without him"

"I know" Alex muttered kissing my head

Julie's face appeared in front of me, miserable

"He closed his eyes. You can go in"

My heart skipped a beat as I walled in feeling like a ghost.

"Will he hear me?" I asked nurse Jones who was on a chair, holding his hands as he looked down. He nodded silently as he left the room.

The room was dull now, light coming only from the window and the now faint green line coming from the heart monitor.

"Hey, Walker." I said moving next to him on the bed, as I grabbed his colourless hand and smiled to myself as I looked at it.

"You know the thing that I admired most about you. I remember I would tell Alex and Brooke everyday about your hands. And imagine our wedding and kids and memories we would have as a family" -- I stopped to dry a tear-- "And all I wanted was for that to happen. For your lips to never leave mine or your touch or your face cause honestly, Walker I don't know what I'm gonna do without you. I need you. I love you. Anyway I guess its time for a goodbye."

I felt a small pressure on my hand. It was like he squeezed my hand

"Goodbye, Walker. Say hi to my nan" and a tear dropped on his hand and I swiped it away with my thumb. And right at that moment a long sound, was heard. I turned to the heart monitor only to find that both our hearts had stopped beating.

I burst out into a fit of shouting his name waiting for a response that would never ever come back to me. I lay on his lifeless body my heart pressed on his chest unable to hear the heart that once beat for me now silent.

Everyone came in as the doctors all cried. Nurse Jones tried to help me up but I fought back. I didn't want to leave him alone I just couldn't.

"Ana, he's gone" he assured me drying tears from his own face.

"No, no he is not. He's just asleep." I turned around "Why aren't the nurses giving him shocks or CPR? Go on get to it" I yelled at the nurses

"Ana?" my sister came in tears streaming uncontrorably

"Ana he wouldn't want you like this. Come on" she gestured to me handing out her hand to mine.

"He can't go. Not now. I need him please"

I pleaded almost no voice coming out and then got out of the chair as I hugged my sister, every memory with him appearing in my mind: the first day I saw him, our first kiss, our first date, our first dance..... and than it dawned on me..... he was gone.... for real this time.....

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