I hate you

14

It's all coming together

Jack's pov

I had to cringe, it was a lot of years since I got a hug. But then, holding him, it was different than any other fake hugs I shared. I never felt this kind of fear when Arthur left. What the heck was that? I couldn't move to stop him. I was frozen. What if he didn't come back? What if he left?

I let go of him softly to look at him. He's so cute. He's so soft and sweet and he doesn't deserve any of what he's been through.

His face still read guilt. He felt like it was his fault and I didn't want him to think that. It's not his fault he wasn't ready. It's not his fault that we fought, it's mine.

"Cupcake." I stated, whispering.

"Yes?" He whispered back, looking up at me kind of shyly.

"I didn't mean to scream at you." I said and he rubbed his tears as we pulled away from the hug, both blushing.

Whoa. This was hell of a theater we shared.

Then I got an idea.

"Hey, I've got something to show you." I said. "It's special."

He smiled softly. I raised my hand, and he took mine, then we left. I had to show him this place, it was really special for me. After all, I used it to think about him when I was young.

Arthur's pov

Jack's apology made me feel warm. I was always the one apologizing for things. So, it was kinda new for me.

We left outside, hand in hand. I trusted him so I didn't really care where we were going.
______

We stopped at a place that looked quiet, abandoned, and beautiful. It was on a train tracks but I suggest the train is no longer running here. Right?

Jack sat in the middle of the tracks, and smiled at me.

Oh, his smile.

I sat next to him, not close, leaving space for both of us. We looked at the outlook of a field that was in front of us. Is was beautiful. Like..

Like Jack.

My cheeks heated up as I looked at him, his eyes were glued to the field, as if it really meant something to him.

"I used to run away from my house at night and watch stars here." He said, knowing that I was looking at him.

I gazed down, pulling my knees up my chest. Should I tell him the truth about my childhood? I think I should. Jack was with me when I was small, he thought I was abused. Only abused. He still thinks that. I don't want to bring it up but it feels wrong when Jack doesn't know. On the other side I always wanted to tell to someone. To cry it out. Not even the newspapers knew this...

"Jack." I said, looking at him.

He looked at me back. "Yes?"

"I lied to you... about my childhood" I took a deep breath, staring to the ground now.
"When I was small.. It wasn't only abuse."

"What do you mean, cupcake?" He placed his hand on top of mine, just like I did the first time when he shared his story. This means so much to me.

"From what I remember I was..." I felt fear to say it. "...sexually used by my mother's boyfriend. A lot, a lot of times." my voice was shaking.