Pretty Scars ║DNF

Chapter 1

The sun is almost setting behind the endless ocean. The colors slowly start to fill the sky. It has been a month since I moved here, but I never came to watch the sun set. In fact, I only came a few times to the beach.

I don't like to go outside very often, only to do groceries once a week. I have to admit that this is wonderful and mesmerizing. At the moment, I don't regret coming here: it feels very peaceful and relaxing. For a few moments, I leave my mind to travel as I take a deep breath like I am trying to fill my lungs with the most fresh air before going back to my apartment. I didn't think I was going to stay this long but here I am, sitting on a rock, admiring.

It is probably the prettiest sunset I ever watched. In London, it was very different. There was no sea and everything looked bland. I grew up and stayed there my whole life in the same small house. As soon as I could, I left to go live in an apartment. My family and I never really had the best relationship. They were loud and would always fight. He would often get screamed at which now makes me scared of loud noises. Despite everything, I knew that my parents still loved me. They never broke up because they wanted the best for me and my younger sister, but both of us knew that it wasn't the reason.

I grew up hiding my emotions a lot thinking that they weren't important. Anyway, nobody was there to listen to me. In fact, I didn't speak a lot but deep inside, I craved talking. The day I last talked to somebody feels so far away. I don't have the courage to even call my sister. As much as I care for her, I am scared of what she has to say to me. I feel like I left her alone with our shitty family situation even though she told me multiple times it was alright.

"You're 24 now George" she said "you can go don't worry about me, I will be fine"

"I will miss you"

"Me too" she said in between two tears "just call me every day"

And we left each other right there. Since then, I failed the only thing she asked me to do. I am much happier here, but I just feel like something is missing.

The waves smash on the rocks right below me making my eyes deviate slightly before going back to my contemplation. I truly miss London even if I am very happy here. The hot air brushes against my skin and all I can do is sit down and relax. I want to stay like this forever like nothing could ever happen.

The sun is almost completely down leaving me in the dark. I sight as it is starting to get cold. I am about to leave when something catches my eyes. Two men started to run directly into the ocean with their surf in their right hand. One is tall with wavy blonde hair. The other is much shorter with brown hair. I am far away from them, but I can still see the big smiles on their faces.

They look so unbelievably happy. Both of them are laughing uncontrollably as they take their shirts off before running into the deep ocean. I can't help but smile at how amazing they look. They seem so pure and joyous riding the waves in the distance. All I can do is stare. I probably look extremely creepy from another person's perspective, but I don't care. Plus, there are literally no other people here. I totally forget about going home and sit there, silently watching.

The cold brings me back to reality as I stand up, still watching the beautiful scene. As I am about to turn around, I swear I see the blonde man looking right in my direction. He rapidly goes back to his previous activities. I leave as quickly as possible without looking back. My heart starts speeding a little faster than usual. I don't go outside quite often and this kind of thing makes me really anxious. I've always been shy, not talking to anybody. Of course, I had few friends, but I could just never get along with them. I am simply too different.

Having to deal with human interactions everyday just feels like a nightmare. That is also the reason why I have a job from my home. I took coding classes after college and I also started streaming a few weeks before. I like it since it usually gets my mind off things.

My thoughts dissipate slowly as I arrive at my apartment. It is not the biggest. In fact, it is quite small, but that is all I could afford. Even if this place isn't the nicest, I promised myself I would make it feel like home. There are still a few boxes on the floor. What is left to open are mostly souvenirs and pictures. It is getting pretty late, but I am not tired. I stand there not knowing what to do. I should definitely go to the beach more often.

My mind goes back to the tall blonde man on the beach. Looking back on it feels awkward but so right at the same time. It was like I was watching a movie without action, but still extremely entertaining. A soft smile escapes my lips at the thought. I can't help it, it just made me so happy for some reason. I feel so pathetic smiling like an idiot in my apartment, but I can't help it.

Maybe human interaction is not that bad after all. I immediately push the thought away knowing that I am probably never gonna speak to him in my life. Without even noticing, my eyes start to shut. I walk straight to my bed, not even caring to change my clothes.