Meet Me in the Middle

Chapter 5

10 January 2016

I wrap my jacket tightly around myself as I rub my hands. It's early January and the weather here is chilly as shit. I try to cover my ears from the wind but it's futile. So much for shampooing my hair in the morning. As I make the familiar turn towards the Topper building, the thing that bothers me the most is the lack of green t-shirts around. Is it Sunday today? I don't even know what day it is.

The past two months have been... rough. That's one way to put it. I didn't leave my room for a whole week after what happened. Didn't even go to the mess. I faked illness and stayed in. It was quite believable too. I always had red eyes and dark circles. I was drastically losing weight. I threw away all of my sleeping pills because I felt like I didn't deserve to sleep like that. And without the pills, it was almost impossible to sleep. The next two weeks were more of the same. I started going out a bit. But never for longer than an hour. I always kept my phones close and started checking it every couple of minutes. There were barely any notifications. I didn't talk to anyone other than my mom. She kept me feeling that maybe I wasn't the only one so lonely.

I broke up with Abhi. Today was the day I was finally coming to Saturday doubt class after more than 2 months. I had a lot of apologizing to do to my faculties. Which is why I decided to carry a whole bag of books instead of a single pen and cleaned up a bit. But seeing this quiet here, I'm compelled to think I made a mistake. I see Rajesh sir about to get into his car near the gate and holler while quickly walking towards him.

"Good Morning sir! Didn't we have classes today?"

"Morning! Didn't you get the SMS alert? It was sent out two weeks ago!"

"What alert? My phone number isn't in the system. I have already put in a request but they told me it was a time-taking process."

"Oh... nobody told you? You could've asked anyone from your hostel..."

"I don't talk to anyone sir. What's happening?" He laughs at my response. Dude, I meant that.

"Victory celebration. Back at the main building. Buses left 30 minutes ago. Why don't you come with me? We'll go there and you can join your friends again." Ha. Friends.

Nevertheless, I get into his car and we drive up to the main building where he occasionally asks me about my exam prep and upcoming plans. As soon as we reach, he asks me to go inside and get seated as he parks the car. I quickly scan the hall. The stage is decorated and all the four old founders are sitting in comfy looking chairs. A table is set in front of them and some medals, flower bouquets and certificates are on top of them. The room is fully packed with students and faculties. Boys on the left side of the room and girls on the right. But at the backward seats, some boys and girls are sitting together. I spot Karthik waving at me, indicating to the empty seat next to him and I start walking in that direction. But suddenly my phone starts ringing. I see that Gauri ma'am is calling me. I answer it and greet her. She ignores that completely and speaks in a hurried voice.

"Where are you, Ayesha!? You weren't there in the bus! I've been looking for you!"

"I was late, ma'am. I came with Rajesh sir. I'm sitting in the back row." I raise my hand so she can spot me in the swarm of hooligans. She looks around and finally sees me and visibly breathes in relief.

"What nonsense! Come sit at the front. Don't sit there with the degenerates." Whoa. Savage. So glad I didn't answer this call on speaker mode.

"Ma'am it's all packed. I couldn't find an empty seat."

"You can find an empty seat! Find one and sit at the front!"

"Okay... I'll try."

I wander through a couple of rows and find that even if a seat is empty, it's 'reserved'. I finally find one in the fourth row, next to the quietest girl of my class and sit there. I engage in a bit of small talk with her as the proceedings start. I barely pay attention to the stage as they reward the toppers for slagging their asses off the whole year. I send a quick text to mom letting her know that I'm at the victory celebration and not to worry if I don't pick up the phone. I'm sure that I'm going to die of boredom till the time they come to my grade. At which point, The Quiet Girl (I don't know her name and even if I did, I've forgotten it) is getting really excited and practically bouncing in her seat.