Big Bang Theory : The Twins

The Peanut Reaction

Scene: The Cheesecake Factory. Raj and Sheldon are arm wrestling while playing tetris. There is a cacophony of cries such as "take him down" and "he's got you, Sheldon."

Penny: Hey, guys, guys, some of the other waitresses wanted me to ask you something.

Leonard: Oh, it's called trestling.

Howard: It combines the physical strength of arm wrestling with the mental agility of tetris into the ultimate sport.

Penny: Yeah, that's terrific, but what they wanted me to ask you was to cut it the hell out. (To someone off) Right come on guys, come on. (Singing while approaching another table) Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you...

Sheldon: We might as well stop, it's a stalemate. You're beating me in tetris, but you've got the upper body strength of a Keebler Elf.

Raj: Keebler Elf? I've got your Keebler Elf right here. (Strains to push Sheldon's arm down. Tries using both hands, still with no effect.) Okay, it's a stalemate.

Ariana: So Leonard, will we be seeing you on Saturday for your free birthday cheesecake?

Sheldon: He can't eat cheesecake, he's lactose intolerant.

Penny: Okay, he can have carrot cake.

Sheldon: What about the cream cheese frosting.

Ariana: he can scrape it off.

Leonard: Forget about the cake, how did you know that my birthday is Saturday?

Ariana: I did your horoscope, remember, I was going to do everybody's until Sheldon went on one of his typical psychotic rants.

Sheldon: For the record, that psychotic rant was a concise summation of the research of Bertram Forer, who in 1948 proved conclusively through meticulously designed experiments, that astrology is nothing but pseudo scientific hokum.

Ariana: Blah blah blah, a typical Taurus. So, seriously, are we going to see you Saturday?

Leonard: Oh, I don't think so.

Penny: Why not?

Leonard: I don't celebrate my birthday.

Ariana: Shuddup, yeah you do.

Leonard: No, it's no big deal, it's just the way I was raised. My parents focussed on celebrating achievements, and being expelled from a birth canal was not considered one of them.

Penny: Uh, that's so silly.

Sheldon: It's actually based on very sound theories, his mother published a paper on it.

Ariana: What was it called, "I hate my son and that's why he can't have cake?"

Sheldon: It was obviously effective, Leonard grew up to be an experimental physicist. Perhaps if she'd also denied him Christmas he'd be a little better at it.

Leonard: Thank you.

Howard: Well I love birthdays, waking up to Mom's special French Toast breakfast, wearing the birthday king crown, playing laser tag with all my friends.

Ariana: Yeah, see, that's what kids should have.

Howard: Actually that was last year.

Penny: So you've really never had a birthday party?

Leonard: No. But it was okay. I mean, when I was little I'd think maybe my parents would change their mind, and surprise me with a party, like this one birthday I came home from my Cello lesson, and I saw a lot of strange cars parked out front, and when I got to the door I could hear people whispering, and I could smell German chocolate cake, which is my favourite.