Unable to let go, unable to run away | Kagehina Angst

Overtime we will grow

*~Author's note*~

⚠TW: there will be mentions of physical abuse in this chapter, you've been warned!⚠

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*~No one's point of view (POV) *~

Hinata's a very cheerful person, every time he walks into a room, everyone looks at him, he's like a sun! He makes everyone's worries go away and just laugh. Hinata never had to deal with anything big in his life. Obviously he got into fights with his sister and mother but nothing that could affect his life so much and change him completely. You could call him the "perfect kid". That doesn't mean he has no empathy towards anyone, it's actually the opposite. He tends to always help everyone, he always felt like he had the responsibility to solve everyone's problems and always have a smile on his face, but sometimes, like every normal person, it was hard on him to keep a smile and act all happy. He like everyone else has his bad days, where all he wants to do is lay in bed.. But due to his personality he does the opposite, he tries to act even happier, he fakes a smile. He's gotten quite good at doing that. But he likes being the sun in everyone's life, it makes him happy. But... After what he saw... Even he doesn't know how to act... This wasn't one of Kenma's games, this was real life.

*~Play "Before You Sleep" by "Matt Tondut, Antarctic Westelands" - Hinata's point of view (POV)*~

It was too hard for me to handle, I ran.. I just ran and ran and ran unable to look back at the scene that looked like it was taken from a horror movie. In the small unclean window he looked from he saw: Kageyama, his setter, his best friend... Being beaten harshly by an older nastly looking man, who resembled Kageyama a little. The older man kicked him with no empathy or remorse. Kageyama's body looked weak, don't get me wrong, Kageyama didn't lose weight he looked normal. But his body language was screaming that he was in pain. I started seeing blood coming out. I couldn't look any longer, I closed my eyes... The man's face was pale, he was overweight, and his face... I wish I could forget his face... It looked angry, sad, and a little out of it. He's probably drunk, as there were alcohol bottles all over Kageyama's living room floor, half of them were broken, but all of them were empty, I assume he drinks a lot. My stomach wasn't doing well either, I felt like throwing up, but nothing came out... My sight started to get blurry, I was crying. Tears falling from my eyes like there's no tomorrow, I couldn't help it.. I felt so many emotions at that moment, anger: "WHY didn't he tell me?! I am his friend, his partner! How could he?!" I thought to myself, "but I mostly felt pain, no one deserves to go through something like that, NO ONE" I thought as tears kept falling down my face uncontrollably... The run felt like forever, but finally I was home. "I was so worried about you! Practice was supposed to end an hour ago! Where were you?" I heard my mom's angry voice yell. My voice didn't want to come out, I tried so hard but it just didn't want to.. I gave up on that idea and instead bowed down. My mom let out a sigh and told me to get changed as my clothes are very wet and that I would catch a cold. I did as she said and went up stairs to my room to change. But all I could think of was Kageyama.. What am I supposed to do after seeing something like that! Do I tell him that I know? No.. He might freak out and run away, the last thing I want to do is make him uncomfortable... I felt myself start to cry again, I wanted to scream... Yell at the top of my lungs for help but nothing came out, just tears.. So many of them it was quite exhausting.

I woke up on my bed, it was so soft... It felt so peaceful because for a second, I forgot about all my problems, about Kageyama, about everything. But that didn't last for long, as I remembered what happened last night.. "I must have fallen asleep on the floor, so my mom moved me to the bed" I thought as I woke up turning my alarm off and checking the time, it was 6:00 AM. There was warm light coming out of the window above my bed, that's how I woke up every morning, it felt nice.. I changed my clothes and went down stairs to the kitchen as I saw my mom cooking breakfast, it smelled so good! If I had to take a guess, then she was cooking bacon and eggs. She noticed me and told me to take a seat and that food was almost ready. I did as she said and went back to thinking about Kageyama, I kept thinking about how I'm going to see him again, what am I gonna say?? How am I supposed to act after seeing what I saw yesterday?! My thoughts were interrupted by the delicious smell of the food my mom cooked.

*~Time skip to after Hinata ate breakfast*~

As always, I was on my way to school. I heard my phone turn on. So I took it out of my pocket slowly, my phone was still a little wet from yesterday, but I didn't mind, "there were more important things to deal with right now, like what the hell I'm supposed to do about Kageyama!" I thought to myself as I looked at the lock screen of my phone, and there was a message on the screen.. I obviously first looked who it was from, my hands started shaking... It was from Kageyama.. I was too afraid to look at what it said, but I had to.. I took a deep breath as I read to myself what he sent me..

-Kageyama: I know you saw me yesterday, Hinata.

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Author's note:

I enjoy making long chapter so be ready for that, since I always have a lot to say. I hope you like the story so far, because I really enjoy writing it... I took inspiration for this story from a little scene from "The Goldfinch" If you've seen the movie, it isn't anime by the way. But I am also taking A LOT of inspiration from "Erased" As I REALLY loved the anime and thought it made an incredible job at the characters and the plot. So be ready to see a lot of ✨ pain ✨. My goal is to make y'all cry 😉 I hope I'll succeed to do just that in the future, anyways, cya!