You bolted for the entrance of the police station as soon as you got out of the car. Donghyuck was shocked to see you act so abrasively—at least not as elegantly as you have in the past—for the first time, and he was compelled to move with efficiency as well, getting out of the driver's seat and locking the doors shut on his way to catch up with you.
You could feel the sweat gather beneath your clothes, your anxiety riddled in your chest as you looked around the station lobby. People roamed by you, most of them middle-aged men dressed in casual attire instead of the blue uniform, and none of them seemed to have time for you as they waltzed past with papers and coffee cups in their hands.
"Okay, okay, where to first...where to?" You asked yourself quietly, your head shifting to look side to side as your concerned eyes darted everywhere for a friendly face you could settle down to as for help.
You couldn't even bring yourself to realize that you weren't acting like yourself. The calm and collected you have flown themselves out the window after knowing that your father has been arrested and taken to the police station.
This wasn't the first time he has caused a scene in public, except all the other times, it had been fed-up yet sympathetic neighbors who put him in his place. This was the first time he has been arrested, and you genuinely had no idea what to do.
Would you have to pay a fine? If so then could you afford the fine? Would they be put in jail, given that he crossed the line this time? The thoughts made you shiver.
"Hey, you okay?"
You didn't even notice it but Donghyuck had come up from behind you. He looked around, accessing the inside of a police station with fascination. He has never been in one before.
His parents have sheltered him so severely when he was younger that he never had a reason to get into trouble, whether the problem was caused voluntarily or involuntarily. And now that he was older, although very capable of causing much worse trouble than his younger self could, he had the incentive not to go too far in case his parents would cut his allowance or confiscate any of his resources
Now that he finally got a chance to take a look, he realized it wasn't much to look at. It was as plain and dull as a police station could get without any criminals present for his entertainment.
"Yeah, I just–I need to find–find someone to ask," you stuttered out, not looking at him. "My dad got arrested and they told me to come to get him, but I don't know where I am supposed to go."
Well, it seemed like this was your first time in a police station too.
Looking away from your agitated face, Donghyuck took it upon himself to search the lobby and find someone who he could stop for a consultation. He has never seen you this anxious before, and he wasn't sure if he liked to see you under so much stress, given it was under the circumstance where making a witty remark would be off-limits for him, and it was caused by an external factor that wasn't him.
Taking a look at your face once again, the intelligent gleam in your eyes long gone, he pursed his lips. No, he definitely does not like to see you uncomfortable at all.
His sharp eyes glanced scanned the place, disregarding the grim expressions on each man's face and only hoping to find a target he could advance toward, and he finally set his eyes on a shorter officer walking out of what seemed to be a cubicle office room, stacks of paperwork in his calloused hands and a distorted expression on his face.
"Come with me," Donghyuck said with a faint beckon of his hand, his feet already bringing him forward so he could stop abruptly before the police.
"What the hell do you think you're doing, kid?"
"Good noon, officer! I just have a quick question," Donghyuck replied with a smile, his tone so vaguely casual yet not disrespectful enough for the senior to deem him as ill-mannered without sounding like a stuck-up.
You followed him but kept yourself well-hidden away from the scrutinizing gaze of the policeman. Donghyuck, feeling your presence all timid and shrunken behind him, felt a surge of sudden protectiveness over your introvertism, and he gently reached a hand behind him to blindly look for your figure.
You gave him your hand, much to his surprise. Your fingers curled carefully around his wrist, almost as if you were looking for moral support despite not being the one asking for directions. He relaxed, letting his hand drop naturally as you continued to hold onto him, and he focused on the conversation he was having with the police officer.
His voice, soft yet solid, rang through your ears in murmurs. You couldn't make out what he was saying, you were tentatively blocking out the opportunity of having to join the conversation at all and leaving the job for Donghyuck to finish. But just the simple trace of reliability in his voice was enough to calm you down, and perhaps make you see him in a different perspective.
You looked up, his hunched back a sudden warming sight to see.
It has been a while since anybody did something on your behalf, and you could just wait until it's done instead of running around trying to fix a problem.
"Okay, thank you!" Donghyuck bowed with a giddy smile, one that people usually couldn't tell if he meant it or not, and he watched the police officer grumpily stomped away before he turned around to face you, his expression dropping into a sneer this time. "What kind of stick got stuck up his ass?"
You gasped under your breath, your eyes widening before you sent him a pointed look. When he shrugged at you, not a trace of guilt lingering on his face, you sighed. "Don't say that, maybe he got something very important to do?"
"Yeah, he does, the important thing is helping civilians," he retorted as-a-matter-of-factly, his hair bouncing at the way he seemed to energetically nodded along with his point.
"I mean more important things, like theft and murder," you clarified after a shake of your head, assuming Donghyuck didn't understand what you were trying to say. "The theft cases in this country were actually quite rampant last year. Our country's overall case toll went from a hundred thousand to a hundred and four thousand cases, which I think is a lot."
Donghyuck looked at you in utter disbelief. It was the rate of voice phishing cases last time, and this time it was theft. Where do you even find this information? Do you look them up for fun? Did you stumble upon it once and somehow decided you would remember it? But why would you do that? He couldn't even remember the last text he sent to someone important, let alone some statistical information about the news.
"Really? How horrible," he muttered. "What about the murder cases, do you know a thing or two about that?"
"Actually, our country has been very consistent with the murder rate ever since the year twenty-thirteen up until–"
"What do you do in your free time? Tell me right now," Donghyuck cut you off, looking at you with deadpan eyes instead of incredulity as he had expected he would. "Do you look at the news and memorize them?"
You pulled your face into a gentle frown, feeling a sense of disbelief that he interrupted your mini-lecture on the intriguing news you found a couple of weeks back on the news column of the search engine page, and obviously at his less-than-genuine question as well, but you answered his question nonetheless.
"No, actually. Although I do read the news when I can, I like to read fiction books more than what the political media has to offer."
He hummed knowingly, but he also gave you a faint, mocking smile that made it appear as if he didn't acknowledge your words. He had a sense that you would take his question seriously, but somehow, even with his prediction, he was still infuriated by how dense you could be.
"I was making fun of you," he told you.
You looked up at him, unfazed. The nervousness surrounding your trembling figure before was gone and the all-knowing gleam he loved so much had rushed back into your eyes. Giving him a nod, you said, "I know, Donghyuck. I always know when you're not being sincere with me. I just choose not to indulge in your antics, that's all."
Or maybe you weren't so dense after all.
He opened his mouth to speak but no words flow out. Now, why did you say it as if he was insincere to you ninety percent of the time? He knew he wasn't like that, but still, he's got to admit that his feelings were slightly hurt by what you said. Not because of you but because of his past actions of insincerity, he supposed—from him cutting you off when you wanted to speak more, to him laughing at your pro-con list, and now this.
It was all fun and games, he swore.
"You knew? Really?" He said, tilting his head. "Has my insincerity ever hurt your feelings?"
You blinked at him in thoughts, knowing your answer but not outrightly saying it yet. Your brain gears turned to figure out the best and cleanest way to tell him the truth, and Donghyuck maintained eye contact with you despite the torment of your contemplating mind. The fact that you had to think made him nervous, and suddenly he wasn't sure if he wanted to know or why he asked in the first place.
"Yes, about three times," you replied after a while, the nonchalance in your eyes more haunting than ever.
Before Donghyuck could even process what you said, you looked to the side and back at him, then you asked, "So where am I supposed to go? I need to find my dad."
"Oh–oh, uh... just, over there, over the glass doors," he said, pointing weakly toward a direction.
You gave him a thankful nod before leaving his side. His wrist slipped out of your grasp easily, and you simply left for the room he pointed toward. He knew that. He knew you weren't leaving him, technically. But something about the loss of your grip emptied a giant hole in his chest, especially after what you just told him.
"Yes, about three times."
Three times, three times, three times. The third time's the charm, the third time is enough.
When was it? What did he say, what did he do? Was it an eye-roll, or did he click his tongue once? Was his tone weird? You didn't seem like someone who would make a big deal out of a small drop of his voice, but then again, you were also extremely analytic so you might overthink the situation. What was it, what did he do—fuck.
He ran a hand through his hair, ruffling it as he pursed his lips in frustration. Goddamn it, Donghyuck, why couldn't you just be serious for once? Why do you make people upset? Why do you have to upset the one person you felt such strong infatuation with?
"Hey! Excuse me, sir! You cannot do that here!"
The authoritative yell snapped him out of his trance, giving him, and a lot of people, a nice startle. Looking up with blazing eyes, he furrowed his brows as his legs moved to take him toward where the noise came from. His hands clenched, realizing half-way that it was exactly where you had left off to, and despite the unlikely odds, he hoped you hadn't gotten yourself roped into any commotion in a police station.
Lord knows what kind of horrible people lurk around this place.
Quick steps led him across the lobby to the glass door. He could see rows of desks and chairs lined up to the side, with an even bigger, seemingly cubical space hiding behind the teller windows on the desks. After pushing himself through the doors, he looked around, watching out for the sight of you and trying to find the source of the commotion he just heard.
Placing the handkerchief an old lady kindly handed to you after your father drunkenly splashed the cup of water at your face, you tried to wipe the side of your head and face clean as you looked around to access the disturbance you have caused in this previously quiet room.
Not a good sight, you got everybody's eyes on you now. You weren't sure if it was because your father was a total embarrassment or because you just got publicly screamed at by your kin. Either way, you wanted those eyes off you at this instant, so you planned to grab your father and leave immediately.
Your eyes barely missed Donghyuck's figure when your father stumbled into view again, catching your attention away from the public.
You reached out quickly, forgetting the dripping water at the end of your hair, and you grabbed onto his arm to drag him to your side. Turning to the policeman standing to the side, looking extremely irritated at your father's actions, you panicked with a dip of your head.
"I apologize for the inconvenience, truly," you said. "I promise I will keep an eye on him next time."
"No, I mean–who gets drunk in public at this time of day? If you have the responsibility of taking care of your father then please do a better job at it," the older man scolded, putting a hand on his hip as he shifted his weight. "From what I heard, this is not the first time he has done this."
"Yes, I'm sorry, I will for sure keep an eye on him next time," you said patiently, your head lowered until you were sure the policeman has left the scene. When you stood up straight again, you turned to your father and you sighed, brows furrowed in pain at how miserable he looked. "Come on, dad, let's go."
Donghyuck took a step forward, questions flooding into his head about the wetness on the side of your face and the impatience of the police officer who walked past him. He could only get the gist of the situation: your father was arrested for drinking in broad daylight, possibly even causing trouble because of it, and now he was causing problems in the police station as well.
Everything else was a blur to him, but he needn't know of the situation to want to step up and help.
Yet, his quick steps came to an abrupt halt when your father pushed you away because of your continuous advances. The scene that followed up unfold before him slowly, but somehow the movements went by too quickly for him to properly process them. He saw everything—your dad yelling at you about not needing your help, and then very quickly, too quickly, a slap across the face.
Gasps erupted around him but nobody came forth to help. He couldn't blame them, though, he too was frozen solid on the ground. The invisible anger brimming behind his eyes burned a straight line down his chest, his hands clenching at his sides as he watched your father mutter something offensive before he spun and stumbled away.
He did nothing when the drunk man brushed past him to leave the room, but he sure was close to jumping at him with two flying fists when his eyes traveled up to see you breathing carefully. He counted with you—one, two, inhale. one, two, exhale. one, two, purse the lips. one, two, hold back the tears.
It was an awful sight. He didn't like seeing you upset, he really didn't. It made his insides churn, it made his skin burn, it made him feel dizzy and hefty. He wanted you to smile, he wanted you to always keep that honest humor of yours, that witty and careful demeanor he appreciated so much.
And then you turned your head, rolling your neck to face forward while your body created mild trembles. Sucking in a careful breath—any mishaps in breathing would lead to a flood of tears, and you would rather not do that in public—you bowed to everyone in the room as an apology for the disturbance.
You thought you have got your emotions under control until you looked up and met eyes with Donghyuck. You felt a shock to your body. How long has he been standing there? God, as if he didn't already think you were weird enough with the statistics, now he knew you have a terrible father too! See if he still wants to be your friend after that!
You felt scared, humiliated, and confused all at the same time. But most importantly, you felt wronged, annoyed, vexed beyond imagination. The way his eyes flashed with pity made you want to burst free with curses flowing freely out of your mouth. You hated it! You hated being pitied just because your father was an asshole, you hated the way people act as if you have it so bad.
You hated being pitied, that regretful look on people's face as if they could have helped you, yet they never do. You wanted to isolate yourself from it, from people. But you also knew, subconsciously, that when nobody reaches out to you, you'd only feel lonely and upset.
It is a two-edged sword, unfortunately. No matter what you do, no matter what others do, you always end up getting hurt anyway, so you'd rather leave the humiliation of being pitied and only take the pain of solitary instead. At least that way, you wouldn't have to explain to anybody.
Donghyuck unclenched his fists in faint relaxation when you started to walk toward him. He opened his mouth to ask a question, or at least he wanted to ask about your wellbeing, but you beat him to it by ignoring him completely and walking out of the room. He looked after you, bewildered, and he followed you out.
You headed out of the police station and went straight for the parking lot. He caught up with you after you stopped by the passenger seat of his car, waiting for him to unlock the door so you could get in and hide away from the outside. A flinch spread through his body when you slammed the door shut, his concern for you overwhelming his concern for the car door.
The water stilled dripped from your head, and he resisted the urge to wipe at it. You already got tissues in your hands. Also, you would not appreciate his antics at the moment, he knew. The way you were breathing when he got into the driver's sea told him to be careful with you; your chest heaved slowly and visible; in and out, in and out, slowly and surely to keep the emotions away.
"Can you drive me to work?" You asked, breaking the awkward silence and getting him to stop staring at you. "I will give you directions, just drive."
"O–oh, yeah, of course." Donghyuck nodded.
"Also, please forget everything you saw today," you said. "You did not see anything, and we will never talk about it."
What a harsh request. Surely, he could try and keep his mouth shut, but eventually, the suspense would kill him. Having to keep the sight of your father screaming at you and slapping you across the face unattended felt like torture to him, because all he wanted to do was ask about it, to understand why your father would do such horrible things to you, an honest person.
And he wondered how you felt. Obviously not the best, but he needed to know exactly how bad it was. Maybe he could help you out, maybe he could cheer you up, even just a little. He wanted to. Watching you hold back tears and cover up the damage your surroundings have done to you solved no questions of his, it just told him how good you were at keeping things to yourself.
"I..." he took in a deep breath, and he exhaled audibly with a nod, "not a problem."
"Thank you," you muttered quietly, your hands moving to your lap where they fumbled with each other. "Can you–" you choked out slightly but immediately covered it up with a cough, "–can you drive me to work now? I don't want to be late."
Oh, Donghyuck caught onto your slip-up just fine, and he felt his heart ache at it.
"Okay..." he said, starting up the car quietly as his mind scrambled to find something to lighten up the mood, something that would make you feel better. With a sniff, he huffed out a short laugh and he spoke, "Hey, maybe you can tell me about something interesting you found on the news lately?"
You turned to him for the first time, the furrowing of your brows expressing such genuine disbelief it made him shiver. Something told him that you thought he was making fun of you again, but he continued to hope that his low voice gave away how serious he was being.
Without saying anything, you simply shook your head and turned to look out the window.
"Why would I do that," you told him. "You don't care."
He felt his heart drop. This was the worst one yet.