I used to ask my mother how much paint we can layer on the walls of a room before the room starts to shrink. I thought that if we kept changing our minds, if we kept putting on new colors, then eventually we would have no room to move or—or breathe.
In the shower, before my stylist arrives, I think I'm going to be sick. I bend over and face the stone floor with my hands on my knees, taking deep breaths to calm the riot in my stomach. It's anxiety. The last thing I want is to be at a table with David, a Luna, and an Alpha that appears to rule a pack from the underworld.
I wonder if this is what David did at my old pack. Did he have dinner with my Alpha and Luna? Did he run the border and have meetings and—I know he attended a dinner party. When did he start to feel me? When was I close enough to trigger something inside of him? What did he think when he saw me standing there with my Luna? Was I truly what he's been waiting for? When I first saw him, I thought that he was the most handsome man I've ever seen. I thought that Alpha blood really must have something special to it to create such a being.
Even though I told myself not to, I admired him as he spoke to me in my Alpha's office. He looked as if he could end any competitor in a matter of seconds. He looked dangerous, and I wanted so badly to believe that I would be the one exception to his wrath. I wanted to believe that no matter what I did, he could never hurt me.
I shut the shower off and dry myself in time for the stylist to fix me. When she arrives, my job is simple. I sit in the seat at the vanity I haven't touched and watch as she blow-dries and rolls and lifts. She adds small touches to my face, little dusts of color and darkness to my eyes—places that threaten to bleed the black product everywhere, knowing my track record these past few days. And when she's done, I stare at myself.
"Is it alright?" She asks, nervous.
"Oh, yes. It's beautiful, thank you. You'll have to come back tomorrow. I have to be all pretty then too."
After she leaves, I slip on the black dress I chose earlier. It wraps around me and ties at the side of my waist. Something about it makes me feel like a proper woman. As I examine myself, I think it may be the sleeves or the respectful hemline, or most likely the pointed neckline that is harsh in shape but shows such delicate parts. I know Jeremy didn't want me to get a black dress. Paired with my hair, I risk appearing somewhat gothic, so I secure a necklace my mother gave me around my neck. It's a simple necklace with a small, blue gemstone pendant.
My mother would love to see me like this. She must have wanted to do this to me for all those years, but I suppose I am only willing to cave for David. I could never speak to him again, and I would still make the smallest decisions with him in mind. That is the power he has over me—the power that terrifies me.
I jump slightly when a knock comes to my door. It's the alarm. He knows. "Come in," I call and create distance between me and the mirror.
The door pushes open and David peers through. I try to look busy by fetching my shoes, and I glance to him as I do so. "Are they here?" I ask and sit on the bed. My hands secure each heel on each foot as I wait for him to speak. I've been waiting to hear his voice for what feels like days.
"No, not yet," he says. "I came to see if you're ready."
I stand. "I am. Unless you think—"
"You look perfect, Brigette. Now come on."
"Is everything alright?" I ask as we head downstairs together.
"I need you to be careful tonight, okay? Alpha Nicodra can be unpredictable, and the relationship between our packs has always been, well, fragile."
"So what? I just have to laugh at his jokes?"
David turns to me. I halt on the steps, for once the one looking down. "I need you to listen to me."
"I am, and I will," I assure him. "If you would prefer I sit this one out, then that's fine. Just say the word."
"No. He wants to meet you."
We resume our decent, and I can't help but ask, "Why?"
"I told him of my finding you. I'm sure he is curious, and it is always good to know when there is a new Alpha or Luna," he explains.
"And would you want me there even if he didn't say that?"
David turns to me again as I leave the last step. My fingers linger on the banister, sliding then helplessly falling by my side. "Yes," he says, "that is, if you can find it in yourself to believe me."
A firm knock sounds from down the hall where the foyer sits. David gives me one last look before going to let Alpha Nicodra and his Luna inside. I wait in my place at the stairs, unsure of how to present myself.
Soon enough, two figures come down the hall. I lean forward and look past them, but there is no womanly shadow lingering behind. I step into the center of the hall and smile, again scanning for Alpha Nicodra's Luna, but the only new addition is the Alpha and his sly look. The pair of Alphas halt at me like the roadblock I've become, and Alpha Nicodra says, "I apologize, Luna; I'm afraid my mate is unwell. She won't be joining us this evening, but she is looking forward to your lunch tomorrow."
In Alpha Nicodra's right hand is a sleek bottle of wine. "Oh, well, I hope she feels better," I say as my eyes linger on the dark, frosted glass. When my gaze finally lifts, I remember to add, "And please, call me Brigette."
The three of us take our seats at the dining table, and I watch as his Luna's place is quickly cleared. Simultaneously, Helena takes the bottle of wine and uncorks it. She pours one glass and another then looks to me. I shake my head, subtly refusing.
"I brought it for our dinner," Alpha Nicodra tells me. "Please, Brigette, try it. Maybe you will like it."
Alpha Nicodra sips from his glass as if showing me the bottle hasn't been tampered with. A soft blush comes to my face. My mother always told me to wait until I'm a little older before drinking. I assume being a Luna qualifies me in a sense. Besides having children, no other time in my life requires such a life-altering amount of responsibility.
I have tasted wine before, however. She let me steal a sip or two now and then, just to test it, to show me that I'm not missing anything particularly delicious. But I know she doesn't drink for the taste. My mother sits down on the couch after dinner and has her fix to relax. Something about relaxing in this exact moment makes me both thirsty and unsure.
I look to David before saying, "You've convinced me."
Alpha Nicodra pours me a glass himself and hands it over. He watches as I lift the delicate rim to my lips, as I sip the deep, crimson liquid. It coats my tongue and, despite the fact that I don't like wine, I set the glass down and nod. "It tastes like wine."
"It does, doesn't it?" The Alpha says with a smile.
"I'm sorry, Alpha, but I am not much of a wine connoisseur."
"What is your drink of choice if not wine?"
I shrug. "I'm not much of a drinker."
Alpha Nicodra nods. "Of course, you're still young."
I take my glass and give it a little lift in the air before saying, "To growing up." I have another sip, a longer one this time.
The Alpha laughs a little and says to David, "You've done well for yourself with this one." He then looks to me. "Will you be joining us tomorrow?"
"I'll be sitting in on the discussion, and I will be at tomorrow's dinner."
"I look forward to it," he tells me.
We enjoy our luxurious meals over the simple conversation. Alpha Nicodra asks me about my family and old pack, but every so often he and David will discuss something that is over my head. I chew my food, sip my rather harsh wine, and smile whenever someone checks in on me with a glance. I continuously stare at David's bread that he has seemingly forgotten about until he gives it to me while he elaborates on the importance of tradition in our culture. When I become too full to finish my steak, I hand him my plate.
"A young pairing with habits of a veteran couple," Alpha Nicodra comments.
I look to David and say, "He is just tolerant of my behavior. It really is a privilege to have the tolerance of an Alpha. I'm sure you are the same with your Luna."
"Indeed I am. We must be, mustn't we?"
David nods. "Of course."
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Thanks for reading!
I wanted to do a double update, but I'm just finishing up the next part. I didn't want to make you guys wait any longer, so I put this one out today and am hoping to get the next out tomorrow, maybe later today.