-Katelyn-
I lay on my side, staring at the wall while I try to sleep. The last couple of weeks have been horrible. I want to be with Colby and have his arms around me again, but this is what we needed.
I place my hand right above my bellybutton, smiling to myself. Then, I feel a small hit, butterflies running through my stomach at the same time. My mouth open in shock. I feel it again, then time I lean up, laughing to myself. This whole time, I've been feeling the baby kick and I didn't even know. "Colby!" I yell, my voice slightly cracking from being tired. "Colby!" I yell again.
He runs into the room, his eyes wide, "what's wrong?!" He slightly yells.
"N-Nothing," I laugh, "come here." I lay back down and he walks towards me, sitting on my bed. I grab his hand and put on where I felt the kick. I feel her kick again and he smiles widely. "Was that?" He asks, looking down at his hand. I laugh and nod when he looks back to me. I feel my eyes water and I laugh again. His pokes around my stomach, putting his hand in another spot. She kicks again, this time harder. "Oh my god," he laughs. He leans down and kisses my stomach, whisper to it. "I love you so much." He says to her.
I smile at his as he lays his head on me. "Can I sleep in here?" He asks me quietly.
"Are you sure?" I ask him, my hands running through his hair.
He doesn't answer me, instead he lays down beside me, going under the blanket. I stay on my back, watching him. He faces me, his arms wrapping around my waist. "We should think of names." He tells me.
"I haven't even considered any." I laugh, lying completely. I fell in love with a name recently but I'm so scared he'll hate it.
"I have a couple," he smiles, "I was thinking Fae, either as a middle name or first name."
"I like it, why that?" I ask his curiously. Colby doesn't strike me as a guy who would actually come up with baby names. Even if he is having a baby.
"It's my birth mom's name." He tells me.
My eyebrows furrow and I turn to him, "Your birth mom?"
"Yeah, I want to honor her." His eyes shift back to my stomach.
"I thought you didn't know anything about her?"
"I do, it's just a sensitive subject and I don't like talking about what happened." He sighs. "But I want you to know what happened and why I want to name the baby after her." He looks back to me.
"O-okay," I nod, "Just when you're ready." I smile.
"When I was four, she died. I don't really remember it that well. But, I know that my dad walked out when she was pregnant. She was 16 when she had me." He shifts slightly and leans up, his elbow not supporting his body as he looks down at me. "My biological grandparents were really religious and didn't want anything to do with my mom after she got pregnant. She lived with her aunt and uncle for a couple years until she was 18. Anyways, one night she sat me down, telling me how much loved me. I barely remember it, barely, but this one thing has stuck with me. She told me that she loved me and that I was going to a better place. I didn't understand what was happening, but she got her phone, dialed a number and then grabbed a gun out of her dresser." His eyes begin to water as his face turns red. "She shut the door to her bedroom, me locked out of it. Then I heard a gunshot. She killed herself."
"Colby-"
"After that point I just remember being carried away, my moms door being opened by the police. I could see blood spattered on the wall, her hand just in my view." He takes another breath, his hand caresses my belly, "I was put into the foster system because none of my family could take me in. I bounced around for a while, but then my parents adopted me. I just remember being so incredibly happy. I was in a steady place, I had a sister and a brother, I was okay for the first time in my life."
"I'm so sorry," I turn over to face him. "I should of never pressured you to tell me. It's none of my business." I frown, my hand caressing his chest.
He sighs and lays back down, "It wasn't your fault. You should know. Like you said, we need to be completely honest."
"Yeah, but I wouldn't-" he cuts me off.
"It's okay," he smiles, kissing my head. "I want to name her Fae, or at least have it in her name."
I nod and smile, "Okay," I run my hands through his hair again, "I love it. And I think I know what to pair it with."
"Really? What?" He smiles.
"When I was thinking of them, I wanted something that reminded me of you. And the first thing that came to mind was your eyes. They remind me of the ocean and when I look at them, it somehow comforts me." He smiles bigger, his cheeks blushing. "So I google different names meaning ocean or sea. And I found that Lana in Hawaiian means calm waters. I thought it was perfect."
"It is perfect. Lana Fae." He whispers, "It's beautiful." He kisses my head again, "that's her name."