“Sorry dude, I just can’t let it go,” my friend Ronnie howled as we speed walked out of our last class together. It was a World History class and a Friday afternoon.The hallways were already packed with students, even though the last bell rang a couple of seconds earlier.
I unintentionally fell asleep during Ms.Dion’s important lectures on the Civil War and that drove her insane. Just as she was about to war on me about sleeping in her class, the bell rang and I was the first one out. Ronnie is finding it very amusing. He finds the littlest things amusing.
“...She is so going to make the test harder, just so you can fail. Just for you bud. You’re very special my friend.” he told me as he patted my back.We dodged book bags and getting elbowed by other students. It happens a lot in the West Chester's High’s halls.
Ronnie just couldn't believe I fell asleep in Ms.Dion’s class. You don’t know her, but if you haven't slept in 72 hours and you have to go in her class for an 80-minute rant on history, you will indeed stay awake. She yells when she teaches, and it’s the kind of annoying whining voice that makes you consider downing down bleach.
“Dude, shut up about it. I didn’t get that much sleep last night. I was finishing this stupid chem assignment-”
“You ran like a b!tch out her class!” he laughed.
We both reached the main entrance to the huge building and walked out. The summer weather was slowly fading away the closer October ended. I only wore my sweatshirt hoodie, and I was still warm. I took my cars keys out of my hoodie pockets.
As Ronnie continued to giggle to himself we reached my old car in the student parking lot. You can easily spot her out (yes my car has a gender) for she isn’t the prettiest convertible. It’s my uncles old car. He moved to Europe last summer and gave me Hagrid (yes I named her too) because he couldn’t afford to bring her with him. She breaks down plenty, but I’m not the one to complain. Ron’s always there to fix her up whenever.
Speaking of Ron let me share a little about him to you. He’s my best friend here. Here being West Chester High, the high school I attend. I as in me as in my name is Graham Toth. The most nicest guy you’ll ever meet here. But I guess that’s pretty bias considering no one's really said that about me. Oh, and I have ADHD. And I was just going to tell you about Ronnie my best friend, so maybe I am also conceited.
Okay, back to Ronnie. The co-captain of the robotics team, the animator for the school's website, the captain of the soccer team, a volunteer worker at the local pet shelter. Ronnie. If you were to look at Ronnie, and you label people for a living, you probably wouldn’t know what box to place him in. He wears glasses like a stereotypical nerd would, but he has no braces, excessive pimples, or weird facial hair problems like a stereotypical nerd would have. He’s fit and tall and has this nice hair that no matter the weather seems to always be in place. The girls love that, by the way. And to think that I would be friends with Ronnie. Who would've guessed?
I had no friends freshman year. All my best bros from 8th grade either moved or went mute on me. I met Ronnie one day at the school and we had to work on an assignment. He looked like a stereotypical nerd then, and I thought he was lame based on his bad B.O. I was currently failing the class we had to do the project in, and Ronnie helped me out a bunch. Turns out, we had a lot in common and even after the project was done, (We earned an A+) he even helped me out with my other classes. After freshman year, we were inseparable. He helped me out with so much and his B.O improved, thank God.
“Oh yeah,” Ronnie said as he closed his side of the car’s door. “I told Dani I was gonna be at her lacrosse practice today,” he told me.
I put my seatbelt on.
“Okay, what a nice boyfriend you are” I replied putting my cold keys in the ignition.
“I don’t need you to tell me that,” He informed me as he remembered to put the seat belt on as well. “I’m telling you because I want you to drive me there. Actually she offered that you can stay too,” he explained.
“No, she invited me because you guys would need a ride back home. I’m not stupid Ron.”
“I will veto that.” He laughed.
I pulled out of the parking lot.
“Hey Ron!” a senior girl waved from outside of the car. Ronnie waved and smiled back. Once we were out the parking lot, he continued talking again.
“Well, the plan is that we watch her practice, and afterward we go to the new burger place down by the gas station. And so you won’t be the third wheel, she’s inviting her friend Alice. Remember her, from that beach party” Ron wiggled his eyebrows at me.
“I was drunk and so was she,” I said.
It’s a long story, what happened between me and Alice, but I’ll summarize it. It’s true, I was drunk, so I don’t remember every detail, but there was this big end of the summer party hosted by last year 's juniors, and almost everyone from West Chester came. Alice is Dani’s teammate on the women lacrosse team for West Chester. Ronnie told me that Dani told him that Alice had this huge crush on me so at the party, me and Alice ended up alone, then suddenly making out, then her ex shows up and beats the drunk out of me. Let’s just say he messed me up real bad. So bad I stayed a week at Ronnie’s house so I could recover from my two black eyes. Last time I came home wrecked, my mom called the cops. She just didn’t believe the story I told her which was the truth, I did, in fact, fall from a ledge trying to pull this skate trick.That’s another story.
But anyways, during the last days before school Alice kept assuring me that her ex was long gone, but I didn’t even have feelings for her, so I didn’t get in touch. Now it seems like I have no choice.
“Come on Graham, I already said it’s a date.” He begged.
“Wait, wouldn’t they be coming from lacrosse practice, all sweaty and stinky?”
“Oh yeah, one more thing,” He laughed “ You will also be driving the two girls to Dani’s house to take a quick shower and then they’ll change. After that’s all sorted we will then head to the restaurant.”
“Dude are you crazy? You guys are definitely paying for gas AND the dinner!” I grunted.
“Sure thing, we already sorted it out.” He smiled. “ We are the ones with the jobs.” he chuckled.
“Shut up, I’m working on it.”
We reached our football field that was around the school. You’d think we could've walked to the field but that’s how big West Chester is, or that’s how lazy I am. I pulled into another parking lot and you could hear the gravel being crushed as Hagrid rolled over them. Up ahead you could already tell the practice started. The girls ran up and down the field, while the coach yelled at the girls who couldn’t keep up.
“I hope Alice doesn’t think I’ll be cheering for her.” I said to Ronnie as I turned the car off.
“If you distract them, the coach will yell at you, I learned the hard way.” He laughed as he jumped out of the car.
“Well if that’s the case, I’ll be sleeping in the car. Wake me up when practice ends.” I told him as I yawned.
“Suit yourself, and if you need the bathroom, it’s over there” he pointed to the back of the school. “See ya,” and with that, he started for the bleachers.
I have to admit, it’s pretty hard to go to sleep with a whistle being blown every second. I decided to go to the bathroom to tidy myself up for this unexpected ‘date’ if you’d call it that.
To be honest I kinda forgotten about Alice. Even though it’s been about a month since the party I really forgot she existed. She’s even in one of my classes. Have I been that focused on the girl with the glitter nail polish. I just realized, I’ve never told you her name. It’s Tia by the way. I just recently learned it. A shame how worked up I am about her when girls like Alice (who by the way is extremely beautiful) are crushing over me. Just as I passed this huge tree, I stand amongst a mini play ground. I never knew my school had any of these.
The sun’s beginning to set and the sky’s horizon is a fiery orange. A breeze passes by and the tree I stand by dances. This playground isn’t deserted though. Far away from the entrance I see a swing set and someone's on it. As if I’m in a movie the person begins to swing and their short black hair floats with the wind, and her ear piercings shine by the reflection of the sunset the sun. It’s her.
This is my chance. We’re alone and this is my chance to speak with her. The girl I unconsciously have a crush on is right ahead of me. I slowly walk towards her careful not to startle her either. She’s wearing a skirt with only knee high socks, and it’s almost October and here I am wearing a sweatshirt, and I’m freezing my balls off. She doesn’t even look cold. She doesn’t even seem to shiver.
“Hey,” I reluctantly said. She stopped swinging and didn’t even turn to face me as she calmly said, “Take a seat Graham.”
This startled me, she knew my name. I walked around the swing set that seriously need some oil and sat down beside her. She stared forward like she always did, but this time she was smiling. I followed her gaze to see a plain field of just grass. I believe we were on a hill because all you saw was the beautiful sunset. The sky was on fire.
She smiled and fell back on the swings, her long arms grasping the link metal to not fall. Her short hair didn’t touch the ground and if the wind picked up her skirt would have flew up but that didn’t happen. Wait, I sound like such a perv.
She got back up and I stopped staring. Gosh she was so beautiful. Did she know that.
“It’s lovely. The sky, it keeps me warm,” she told me still smiling at it.
Was she on drugs? I had no clue.
“Yeah, it is something. You uh, you come here often?” I asked not sure of how to talk to her without seeming like the stalker I was.
She closed her eyes humming to the sound of the wind. Atleast the rumor of her never blinking is false. Once she was done with whatever she was doing, she opened them again. “Yeah, I love playgrounds. They are supposed to be happy places for kids. Even though I’m 16 I still feel like a kid, who needs a little happiness in her life.”
“You’re not happy, why not?
“Don’t seem soo interested” she taunted. “No one cares,I even didn’t for a while, but I realized that not caring is not healthy, so I’m trying this new thing called ‘fuck everyone and be me’” As she talked she used her hands and her black hair bounced around.
“I like it. Very self expressed, and I actually care believe it or not.”
She looked at me finally, and gave me this despised stare. Then she rolled her eyes and sighed.
“You don’t even know my name Graham, don’t try to play a hero.”
“I’m definitely not a hero but I definitely am good with names.”
“Good for you.” she replied flatly.
“Hey, I was wondering,” I said. “ What happened to you during the 3rd week of school. You weren’t here for a while, and I was-”
“What, worried?” she interrupted sounding amused. “Please save it. If you’re only talking to me to get laid, you're gonna have to catch me on another day.”
“What? No, let me finish. I don’t know if you know, but I’m in your homeroom and I just didn’t see you in a few. Then out of nowhere you return.. different? And you’re like- well, you look-”
“Dead?”
“Huh?”
“Yeah, I’m well aware, my mom keeps reminding me. She hates that I dyed and cut my once virgin hair. She freaking freaked man. Gosh, I’ve never seen her cry so much…”
“Whoa, sounds like she was pretty pissed.”
“Pissed would be one word to describe it. Before I returned home I snooped outside her book club’s building that day, and she looked so happy. She looked brighter and more alive. I don't know about you, but if my daughter was to suddenly disappear without my notice I wouldn’t look so.. upbeat. Anyways I came home and when she arrived she screamed. The neighbors even came to see if everything was alright. My mom threatened to send me to a mental hospital because of my sudden change in appearance, but she finally came to her senses. She went bat shit crazy.I just couldn’t take it being her ‘flawless’ daughter. I just wasn’t me.”
“But damn, she was going to send you away?”
“She doesn’t care. No one does. It’s like I’m temporary. Like I was put on this earth for just a certain amount of time. I can sense my end nearing…”
“Whoa, chill out...”
“Haha what, too dark for you?”
“No it’s just. I-I don’t know.”
“The truth is, no matter what, we all are temporary.”
She said it so happily, like she wasn’t alone. And she wasn’t. It’s obvious that she’s been through so much, but how can I ask her. But she was speaking the truth, we’re all going to die one day.
“Are you okay Tia?” I asked her, making sure I said her name.
“Oh wow, you are good with names.”
“I never lie.”
“But that’s a lie, everyone lies” she laughed.
I waited till she was done laughing to repeat my question. “Are you okay, really?”
I looked her straight in the eye. My father does that with his psychology patients.
She avoided my eye contact and just looked down at the grass beneath her, brushing her hair behind her ears.
“No, no one is really okay. Not even the happiest person that walks the earth. If everyone was okay the world wouldn’t be so amazing, so please don’t freak because I’m not okay. People like me make the world amazing...”
“Please, for once can you not be poetic and just answer truthfully.”
Tia looked at me with disgust.
“Why are you talking to me Graham? You never do.”
“I always wanted to.” I truthfully answered. Once it came out my mouth I didn’t believe I said it, looking at her from the corner of my eye for a reaction. She just stared at the sky like she was waiting for something to pick her up and take her away.
“You always wanted to talk to me? Why havent you? I don’t bite.” she mused.
“You just never talked. So I never did to you either.”
“Why would you want to talk to me?”
Since I was in the truth telling mood, I just decided to answer with certainty once again.
“Well because you were… beautiful. You just were different and I like that about you…”
“Are you flirting with me Graham?” she asked me.
The wind picks up and I put my hands that were once on the swing’s metal link into my gray sweat-shirt pocket.
“No Tia, I’m just being truthful.”
“Bullshit. I thought you said you never lied.”
It was silent, and we both just stared ahead.
Did I just get rejected?
My mind was blank for a few and I couldn’t remember where I was for those 5 silent minutes. To disturb the peace, my phone beeps and I pull it out. A text from Ronnie, the girls just finished practice. I got up from the swingset that squeaked abruptly and started to walk towards the field again.
“Graham.” Tia says. I turn around to face her, and she’s standing up this time.
“Tia.” I say.
She rolls her eyes and says “You said ‘were beautiful’. Am I still beautiful?”
“You’ll always be beautiful Tia.”
To save the awkward silence I was sure would come, I turned back around and walked towards the field. I have to admit that last saying was pretty cheesy but it had to be said.