hey.
It's currently 0:00 and everyone at home is asleep. I decided to wrap myself up in some warm clothes and go out to the balcony just to watch the night sky while listening to music.
I't's actually a pretty realxing thing to do. But I couldn't concentrate thinking about you.
I love you so much. I fell in love with every thing you do. And when I tell myself it's no big deal, then Monday comes and I clown myself when I see you. You really are a big deal, aren't you?
As I was saying, I was in the balcony admiring the night sky. I kept overthinking everything that has happened lately and I couldn't help but cry. Hard.
It's just- you are confusing me too much.
One day I feel like your soulmate and the other I feel like you like her.
I'm not blaming you, you are not doing anything wrong. It must be me who is wrong and nothing has really changed in your behaviour.
But I'm hurting inside. I can't even explain what I'm feeling. But I've been feeling alone since people in my family don't want to understand me for being a teenager who 'is always complaining about everything' and I can't help but feel left aside.
I used to find comfort in you and the rest of my friends but now I noticed a change of behaviour in her when she's
around you. She is supposed to be my best friend yet she keeps changing herself just when you are there and you don't seem to notice, but she's been really mean and even harsh to me.
I used to find comfort in you but now I... I feel the most alone I ever felt.
But don't worry, I don't understand myself either.
Right now I'm crying my heart out and overthinking every single thing that happens but maybe tomorrow I'll laugh with you at some stupid joke and go back home swooning over you.
I just... I need a signal.
I love you so much, see you on Monday🖤