Chapter Twenty-Three.
"I swear Noah, you cannot laugh at me when I fall on my butt," I repeat for the thousandth time. Ice skating. Where does Noah come off on taking me ice skating? It's like he picks the most random things, that he knows I'm going to fail at. Bowling-that was a complete fail. Now ice skating will be an epic fail.
"I won't let you fall," Noah smiles, grabbing my hand and dragging me onto the ice.
I have to admit though, Noah picked a good place. This is cute; an outdoor ice skating rink, with lights all around. He picked a good night too, because not a lot of people are here; which is better because than means less witnesses to see me fall on my butt like a moron.
Noah guides my waist as we slowly glide along the ice. "I think that this is another scam to touch me," I tell him.
He chuckles. "I think your right," he teases. "See? It's not so bad."
I smile. "Yeah, until you let go."
Noah kisses me on the cheek. "I won't."
At least fifteen minutes goes by and I think that I finally have the hang of this. Not that I don't love being in Noah's arms, but I want to try it by myself. I start skating by myself, only using Noah for support if I start to lose balance.
"Aren't most first dates supposed to be at the movies?" I question, being careful not to fall.
Noah shrugs. "I have a theory about the movies when it comes to first dates," Noah admits.
I roll my eyes. "Here we go..."
He laughs. "No, I think you're going to like this," Noah says. "If you want to hook up with a girl, you take her to the movies; because what else are you going to do in the dark for an hour and a half?" I start laughing. "I'm serious. If you want to be with a girl, you take her to a place where you can just...hang out and talk," he explains.
How is it that all of the things that I thought I knew about Noah, he proves wrong? Making me feel like I don't know him even more. "So I'm not just a hook up to take up space on a long list of girls?" I check.
Noah laughs. "Define hook-up."
I roll my eyes again. "You know what I'm getting at Noah, how many girls have you slept with?"
"How many girls do you think I've slept with?" he asks.
I shrug. "I don't know, how many girls are there in the school, minus me?"
"You seriously believe that I've slept with every girl in school, besides you?"
Why is he answering my questions, with questions? "Well, not every girl, but you've been with a lot of girls, haven't you? I mean, the only time you weren't screwing around was when you were with Natalie," I point out.
"Mily..." Noah tails off. "Do we have to talk about this? I mean, the girls in my past aren't important."
I nod. "It's important to me. I mean, if the situation were flipped and I had slept with other people, wouldn't you want to know how many?"
"To be honest with you, no, I wouldn't want to know, because then I would get a mental image, so spare me, please," he states.
I sigh. "Well, I want to know."
Noah shakes his head. "You wouldn't believe me even if I told you."
I stop skating and look at him. "Is it really that many?" I ask quietly.
"Why do you assume many?" Noah asks.
I narrow my eyes at him. "I'm not stupid, Noah, I know that you've been with other girls, you might as well just tell me and get it over-"
"Natalie'stheonlygirlthatI'vesleptwith," Noah blurts out really fast, stopping me from finishing my sentence.
"What was that? You said it really fast," I laugh.
"I said," Noah pauses, getting closer to me, "Natalie is the only girl that I've slept with," he says slowly, but very quiet, so that I'm able to make it out.
I wait for him to start laughing, as a sign that he's lying, but he's not. "You've really only slept with one girl? I'm supposed to believe that?" I smile.
"I'm not saying that I haven't fooled around with a lot of girls; because I have. I'm saying that Natalie was the only girl that I went...all the way with," he explains quietly.
That's a lie. That has to be a lie. "Why don't I believe you...?"
Noah looks away, avoiding my eyes, like there's something else he's hiding; something he wants to tell me, but is afraid it's going to hurt me. "Okay, maybe that's a lie. Natalie was the first-for a lot of things, but when I found out that she was cheating on me, that's when I started screwing around. I liked Natalie, a lot, but she messed me up," he smiles half-heartedly. "I would never do that do you though. I mean, the only reason I did it in the first place, was to get back at her," Noah explains.
I nod along, accepting the fact that he's being honest-which, apparently is rare when it comes to the Fletchers boys. I just can't believe that he thought I'd buy that whole bit about Natalie being the only girl. I wish that were true. "Did you love her?" I ask quietly.
"Loved, as in past tense? Yes, I did, or at least I thought I did," he replies. "I think I felt more for her than she did for me, otherwise, she wouldn't have cheated on me."
"Would you say that she was your first love?"
"If you have to label it," he chuckles.
"So, if Natalie was your...first," I pause, "how am I supposed to compete with that?" I question nervously.
Noah laughs. "Is that what you're worried about? Why would you even want compare yourself to a girl like Natalie, you two are completely different," he states.
"Yeah, but I can't compete with the fact that you'll always remember your first," I explain.
He nods in agreement, leaning in really close. "Yeah, that's true, I guess I will always remember my first," he pauses, "but only until I have my second," he finishes, allowing me to feel his warm breath on my cheek. Instead of kissing me on the lips, like he leads me to think, he sweetly kisses my cheek.
Does Noah have a comeback for everything? I mean, everything I say to talk myself out of this...relationship, he has something to say to make it seem...not important.
"So, are we done talking about this?" Noah asks. "Because it's a total buzz-kill."
I nod and smile while slipping my fingers in the empty spaces between Noah's.
While walking to take off our skates, I completely trip and fall, landing on my butt. Noah fights a smile and helps me up. How embarrassing? At least if I would've fallen on the ice I had a reason, but falling right when I get off; that's embarrassing.
"Mily, did you just fall?" Noah questions, stating the obvious.
I shake my head. "No, I... I attacked the ground," I correct.
Noah narrows his eyes at me. "Backwards?" He chuckles.
I shrug, smiling. "What can I say, I'm talented," I explain.
He laughs and snakes one of his arms around my waist. "We can't have you falling again," he grins.
That's exactly why I couldn't believe that Natalie was the only girl Noah slept with. I guess Natalie was the one to screw him up and I just never noticed. I never noticed a lot of things about Noah, because I was too busy noticing Matt.
Shit. Matt...
I shouldn't have lied to him, he doesn't deserve it. He's my best friend and keeping secrets from him, is a big no-no. Now, I feel even more guilty for being with Noah.
As Noah and I are walking down the sidewalk, almost home, I slow my pace because this is the end of the date.
The first thing in my mind is the goodnight kiss, is it bad that I want him to kiss me already? We don't even have to say good bye, he can just kiss me and this night will end amazingly perfect.
Instead of Noah stopping, he keeps walking, pulling me along because out fingers are intertwined. "Noah, wha-"
"Are you eager to get away from me, Mily?" Noah teases.
"You mean, there's more?" I question. "But I thought that was the date."
Noah answers with a smile. "Maybe I'm not ready to take you home, yet."
"Then where are we going?" I ask, curiously.
Noah shrugs. "Nowhere too special, except that you and I will be there, of course," he replies.
Noah can be such a jerk sometimes, but when he says sweet things, it's like his jerk moments never even happened.
The whole way to this 'not too special' place, Noah and I keep a conversation going, about pretty much everything. Everything, except things about him. He's either really good at not answering, or I'm really good at talking about myself. I hope it's not the second one. Oh my gosh, now he probably thinks I'm conceited.
Suddenly Noah covers my eyes with his hands, as we make it through a bunch of trees. "Oh my god, Noah is this where you kill me?" I joke, hearing fallen leaves crunch under my shoes.
He chuckles against the back of my neck. "No, but you have to promise that you won't make fun of me," he whispers into my ear.
I nod. "I promise."
After a few more steps, Noah drops his hands, allowing me to see a bus parked on an empty, deserted road. There aren't any trees surrounding it, just the open sky. I didn't even know that places like this existed in New York, considering the only part I've seen is the city. "Y-you actually d-did this?" I stutter in shock. "H-how? Why?"
"Tom drives a bus, remember? Why do you sound so shocked?" Noah asks, as we walk closer.
I shrug. "When we first talked about this date, I for sure thought that you would take me to go throw things at hobos, destroy something, get drunk, maybe set something on fire," I pause, searching for what I'm about to say next. "But, to be honest though, I'm glad that you didn't," I finish, smiling.
"That's a good thing, because I seriously debated whether or not I should take you to a gay bar. Then, I thought about getting you really drunk and taking you to tattoo shop and let you wake you up with a clown tattooed on your ass," Noah replies, clearly joking. "But, I decided that I couldn't ever sleep with somebody that has a clown on their ass, so I wanted to keep my bets open, just in case," he winks at me.
I shouldn't laugh at that, but I do anyways. That laugh was my ticket to hell, guaranteed. "What makes you think that I would ever sleep with you? From what I hear, you don't actually have that much experience," I tease.
That comment doesn't even stump Noah. He quickly replies with, "well, we can practice, they say that it makes perfect."
I roll my eyes, I set myself up for that one. I think that we've talked about sex too much tonight. I mean, if I'm thinking about it, then he's thinking about it, and the next thing you know, we'll be doing it- that thought was SO uncalled for. Sometimes I wish that I could just shake my head, like an Etch-a-Sketch and have my thoughts go away. After all, my thoughts are what get me in trouble.
Noah and I walk onto the bus and the first thing I notice is that there are three candles in the back, brightening up the area. Then I notice that the whole back area of seats have been taken out, which is why there's a big blanket put down. The last thing I notice is a bag of clear Gummy Bears. What can I say, the guy knows my weakness.
I can honestly say that I am surprised at how much thought Noah put into this. I would've been perfectly impressed by the ice skating, but this is...amazing. There isn't one thing that I would correct.
Within an hours time, the emergency exit door on the roof of the bus is open and we're laying on the blanket, staring at the stars. This would be totally and completely cliché, if we weren't in a bus, eating clear gummy bears. But I guess that we're starting our own cliché.
Both of the Fletcher brother make everything with them anything, but a cliché.
While laying with my head resting on Noah's chest, I notice that same ring on a chain around his neck. As much as I've opened up to him, I wish that he would open up with me. Whatever it is, I'm sure that it's nothing that could shock me at this point. I just don't like being left in the closet, not knowing the personal side of him.
"Noah," I start, preparing myself for a question. "Did you tell Natalie about the story behind this ring you're wearing?" I ask, quietly.
Noah responds by shaking his head. "She never asked."
"Would you have told her, if she did?" Maybe I'm pushing my luck, but I can't stop thinking about it.
He shrugs. "I don't know, maybe. If she hadn't cheated on me."
I prop my upper body up with an arm to look at him. "I'm not cheating on you, so why won't you tell me?"
"Technically we aren't together because you're already with my brother, gay or not," he states.
I sigh, knowing that he's right. That's my hint to break up with Matt, but I can't. As long as Matt's in the closet; keeping his secrets, I guess I'll be in there too; not knowing Noah's secrets.
*****
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