It turns out that pink hair is not the only eccentric thing about Kim Seokjin. The penthouse is immaculately decorated, all floor to ceiling windows and silver accents with pristine marble flooring and sleek white furniture. For being so elegant, it is somehow also very homey. There are houseplants here and there that add splashes of green to the monochrome. A fire crackles in the hearth, and there are fluffy white blankets and throw pillows on the plush gray couch. A fat black cat drowses peacefully on the mantle. It's awkwardly hot in the house, a bit like a sauna but without the humidity.
"You were right about the decor." Yura says softly to fill the awkward silence that has ensued. Seokjin chuckles a little bit. Taehyung doesn't know how someone can be both humble and smug simultaneously, but Seokjin embodies the oxymoronic pairing perfectly.
"I know. Looks like I'm not the only one with impeccable taste." Seokjin says, but pauses with a dramatic flair. "Or maybe I just watch too much HGTV. Either way, make yourselves at home. I'll make us something to sip on, and then we'll begin." He gestures broadly to his living room, and dismisses himself to the kitchen. Taehyung finds himself gravitating towards the fireplace. He kneels down beside it, gloved hands outstretched towards it to seek warmth.
"You okay?" Yura asks, unsure of whether to sit on the couch or tend to Taehyung. She'd much rather do the latter, but the last thing they need is her having another overheating episode.
"Mhm." Taehyung hums. "Just a little chilly." He reassures her. Yura knows that that's the understatement of the year, but, nevertheless, she doesn't press further. She knows Taehyung would rather her not worry, but she can't help it. All she can do is pretend she doesn't see through the facade he puts on. She picks up one of Seokjin's blankets and walks over to the fireplace. Taehyung's broad shoulders melt into her hands as she drapes the blanket over them. He leans back, his head resting on her hip as he looks up at her. "Thanks." He says softly, a smile playing on his almost blue lips. "You didn't have to do that."
"I'd do anything for you." The painfully cheesy words slip out of her mouth before she can properly process them, her fingers gently brushing his dark locks off of his forehead. His smile only grows.
"I'm rubbing off on you, because that was rom-com worthy." He informs her, and she shuts him up by leaning down and pressing a kiss to his forehead, skin cold to the touch of her lips.
"Whoawhoawhoa, no. Stop that. The more you touch now, the more you'll regret it later."
Yura springs back from Taehyung when she hears Seokjin's scolding as he returns with a platter of drinks. Though his tone is sharp, his face doesn't match the energy. There's an oddly understanding look in his eyes, although he clearly means business. Something about his softening features and hardening tone of voice doesn't add up, but he continues before Taehyung can think too much about it.
"Good grief, no wonder your polar reactions are so intense. I'm gone for two minutes and you can't keep your hands to yourselves." He mutters, shaking his head. Yura blushes a bit and leaves Taehyung, opting for the couch. Seokjin walks over to the fire and places a cup of warm tea with lemon on the marble floor next to him. "Anyways, Jung Hoseok debriefed me on your situation over the phone. As much as I'd like to spare you from giving me an explanation, I'm afraid Mr. Jung's information wasn't nearly specific enough." He says, and hands Yura a glass of ice water with lemon. He clearly has been debriefed, as he gave them each a drink to soothe their respective problem. The two soulmates watch as the pink haired man takes a seat in an armchair, what looks like water but smells like vodka in his glass. "You'll have to start from the beginning."
"Oh, all right." Taehyung speaks up, taking the gilded silver handle of the teacup in one hand and holding the cup part in the other, using it to warm his palms. "Well, we met at the—"
"Oh, I'm sorry, I wasn't clear enough. I mean the very beginning. Back when you first experienced the taste. You don't need to tell me everything everything, but any notable events between then and you meeting, and then everything everything from after you met." Seokjin informs him, and tosses back a big gulp of the vodka as if it is in fact water. Taehyung speaks up first, knowing for a fact that he's got less of a traumatic past then Yura.When he gets to describing the time when Yura ate less and less, Seokjin stops him. He looks to Yura, who swallows dryly.
"Will you take it from here?" He asks quietly, lips pursed. His voice is gentle, but firm. "I know it's not easy to talk about, but if you really want me to mend your bond, I need to know it all. Even the tough stuff." As if sensing Yura's growing anxiety over what she needs to do, Seokjin's fat black cat meanders over to Yura and plops down in her lap. Her hands find purchase in its fur, and it begins to purr happily. "See? We're all here for you. Even Meatloaf."
"You named your cat Meatloaf?" Taehyung speaks up, raising an eyebrow but smiling nevertheless.
"Since he's built like a meatloaf. See the resemblance? He's very dense and wide." Seokjin explains, and Yura manages a smile then, breaking through her nerves like a ray of sunlight through the clouds.
"I can attest to that." She says, having to actually put in effort to situate the heavy cat on her lap comfortably. When the room goes silent, she looks around at her audience. Though it's only two people, and one of the two is the man who fate bound her to and the other wants to help her, it's still daunting. She has never talked about this with anyone, afraid it would make her seem weak and pitiful. Her eyes connect with Taehyung's espresso colored ones, and she submerges herself in the comforting pools of warm brown. Although he knows, she has never told him the story from her own point of view. While the logical side of her knows that he would never judge her, the illogical side urges her to keep quiet and shut him out, shut them both out.
Taehyung's lips turn up into an encouraging grin, and he nods at her, a vote of confidence. The smile alone pries the door she had been trying to keep shut wide open. The story spills out, the dam that had kept it bottled up inside her for all these years breaking.
"When I was young, my parents...I had a good childhood, on the surface. We never struggled financially. I always had a roof over my head, a shirt on my back and food to, uh, eat. My dad was a personal trainer for the Samsung Lions, y'know, the baseball team. So, he made the money, and my mom stayed home with me. I was an only child, since my mom had debilitating endometriosis; it made her infertile. I was a miracle." Yura says, but the way she practically spits out the last word brings the bitterness she normally holds deep in her heart to the forefront of her tone.
"She called me her little miracle until I was older, anyway. Once I hit puberty, and started to have wider hips, stretch marks on my thighs and my ribs..." She trails off, breaking Taehyung's gaze as if she's embarrassed of those things. He longs to grab her by her chin and force her to look at him, make her see that she should never feel embarrassed of naturally occurring, beautiful parts of herself, especially not in front of him. He sits on his hands to contain himself. Seokjin, as if noticing Taehyung's urge, reaches over and pats Yura's knee comfortingly. "She didn't treat me like I was miraculous anymore. She told my dad, and he got me to work out. She put me on this crazy diet, but nothing worked. I was growing up, my hormones were too unstable for me to lose weight. I researched it, found out that that's why. But they didn't listen. They stopped bringing me to my dad's events, couldn't risk me ruining their image of fitness. I felt so alone. I just wanted my parents to love me again, so, I..."
"You stopped eating." Seokjin murmurs, sighing softly. Yura nods, biting her lip and stroking Meatloaf to keep from fidgeting anxiously.
"Yeah. It didn't feel like it, sometimes. Taehyungie noticed that he wasn't tasting as much, and he tasted all my favorite foods for me." Yura says, glancing to Taehyung again, who smiles sadly at her. Imagining young Yura going through such mental abuse makes his heart break. "It only ever really felt like a bad thing when I started fainting. Most of the time I was on my own, and I'd wake up a while later, but then, finally, I got skinny enough for my parents to take me to an event. I was emaciated, malnourished, but they didn't care. It was good enough for them. I passed out at the event, and my heart stopped. They had to jumpstart my heart with a defibrillator, but I was dead for fifteen minutes." She explains, sighing with finality, and a bit of pride for having spoken about that for the first time in years.
"I see. Well, firstly, that's fucked up. Your parents are kind of the worst." Seokjin deadpans, and takes a drink of his water. Yura manages a small smile. "No offense." Seokjin adds, almost as an afterthought.
"None taken." She assures him.
"Secondly, Taehyung, did you experience her death? Were you eating?" Seokjin questions. Taehyung nods, pressing his lips into a thin line.
"Yeah, dinner. I took a bite, and...nothing. It was genuinely...God, I don't even have a word to describe how awful it was. It was so scary." He says, and, suddenly, Seokjin lets out an anticlimactic chuckle, a knowing smile on his face. He clears his throat when Yura and Taehyung look at him in confusion.
"Sorry, sorry. Not funny. Definitely not funny." He apologized, but the smile persists. Yura and Taehyung share a look. Seokjin isn't telling them something. "I digress. So, that was it. That's the moment of disconnection. The moment your soul bonds got lost. Half of the equation solved. Now, Yura, do you know if your current soulmate had a near-death experience."
"Yeah, he did. Wonho's father used to beat him up pretty bad." She says, and Taehyung rolls his eyes.
"How ironic." He mutters under his breath.
"Once, he had to get emergency surgery to fix internal bleeding, and he died on the table for a few minutes." Yura says.
"Alright, well, that part was easy. We have the disconnection and reconnection figured out. Now, tell me about after you met." Seokjin instructs, and the two launch into it, sharing every detail with the pink-haired man who listens so intently.
"Are you fucking kidding me?" He exclaims, once they reach the part where they kissed. This comment follows ones like "Wow, I feel like I'm hearing the plot line of a drama right now," and, "Jesus, why isn't my life this exciting?" But this time, there is no humor behind his words. Seokjin's previously lighthearted demeanor has been wiped away by pure annoyance and resignation. He sighs, downs the rest of his water like it's alcohol, and stands up, wiping his hands on his thighs in defeat. "You kissed? Three times?"
"Um, yes. We didn't know not to. Hoseok didn't tell you?" Taehyung asks awkwardly, biting his lip.
"No, of course he didn't. He's smarter than that, that son of a bitch. He didn't tell me, because he knew I wouldn't help you if I knew." Seokjin says, and is met with dropped jaws and silence. "Well, it's unfortunate you made such a long trip for nothing, but, there's nothing I can do. You can see yourselves out." He says, and walks into the kitchen casually. Yura and Taehyung sit still, dumbfounded for a moment before scrambling to their feet and running after Seokjin.
"Wait, wait, Seokjin, hold on!" Yura exclaims as she and Taehyung barrel into Seokjin's kitchen, where he stands pouring vodka into his glass at the bar cart. He sighs, maintaining his back to them.
"My house is certainly not big enough for you two to get lost on the way to the door and end up here." He says, and Taehyung puts his hand on his shoulder, turning him around. Seokjin clenches his jaw at the desperation in his eyes.
"Seokjin, why can't you help us?" Taehyung asks, ignoring the elder's comment.
"Because there's nothing I can do. Tamashi No Mezame is a complex procedure, and I cannot perform it if the steps are done out of order. You're too far gone, I'm sorry." He says, and Taehyung's face falls, and he lets his hand drop, feeling guilty for ever kissing Yura in the first place.
"No, don't lie to us." Yura speaks up.
"Excuse me?" Seokjin asks, brows raised.
"You're lying. Hoseok said there's still a way. He said it's harder if the steps aren't done chronologically, but it's still possible." She says, and Seokjin's angry expression breaks into a sardonic smile. He laughs again, that same emotionless laugh and brings his glass to his lips, taking slow, long drinks until the glass is empty. He doesn't wince at the burning that must be in the back of his throat once.
"Jung Hoseok is really too smart for his own good, isn't he?" He mutters, setting the glass down on the bar cart with a thud.
"What can we do, Seokjin? What are our options?" Taehyung asks, and Seokjin sighs, dragging a hand over his face in exasperation.
"There's only one option. And I've only ever done it one time, and not successfully." He says quietly, his voice raw and emotional for the first time, not hidden behind his eccentric facade he put on the moment he answered the door. "It really is beyond my pay grade—"
"Seokjin. Please." Yura stops his last attempt to get out of telling them. He finally looks up at them from the spot on the floor he had been drilling into with his eyes. "What do we have to do?"
"I need to bring you to the brink of death, Yura. I need to slow your heart rate and your brain waves down enough to put you into a state in between life and death. I need to walk you through the netherworld while you're in that partially conscious state, and I need to instruct you on how to tether your souls together again." He says, and then there's dead silence. Yura nods slowly.
"Okay...that doesn't sound so bad. Not as bad as I thought." She says, and Seokjin raises his eyebrows.
"Really? You think?" He asks, his eyes cold. "Let me tell you, you're right. It isn't as bad as you thought. Because it's worse. It's a million times worse than you thought, since worst case scenario, you both die. Slightly better case scenario, one of you dies, and the other loses taste, but is in a constant state of negative polar bond reaction. Take it from someone who knows firsthand." Seokjin says, pointing to himself. That's when it all clicks—Seokjin's drinking vodka like it's water, his raging fire in the hearth that makes the house much too hot. His soulmate died from this option, and left him like this for the rest of his life. "It's terrible. Wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy."
"Oh, Seokjin. We're so, so sorry—" Yura says, and Seokjin rolls his eyes.
"Save your sorries. I don't need your pity. I need you to know that this procedure is the exact opposite of what I advise. Many couples go about their lives in their polar states, many of them are happy. They all live through it. That's what's most important, isn't it? Having the time to grow old together? Isn't that the goal?" Seokjin asks, and that's all Taehyung needs.
"You're right. That is the goal." He turns to Yura. He thinks about growing old with her, getting married and having children somehow, naming them not after his family chickens and watching them grow up. He thinks about spending his life with her, and he doesn't think that any amount of physical pain could make him want to risk losing that. "Right, Yura?" He says, when she doesn't speak up for a few seconds.
"I want the procedure, Seokjin." She says, and Taehyung's haw drops, panic setting in.
"Yura, no." Taehyung says firmly, but she doesn't look at him, keeps her eyes solely on Seokjin.
"Let's do it, I want it. When can we start?" She asks. Seokjin's gaze flicks between her and Taehyung, who continues to protest.
"Yura...are you sure?" Seokjin asks softly. "I really don't think this is a good idea—"
"When can we start?" Yura snaps, almost venomously, silencing both Taehyung and Seokjin. Taehyung feels tears threatening to fall, and Yura still doesn't look at him. Seokjin sighs, rolling his shoulders and squaring them in acceptance of her decision.
"No time like the present. Let's get this shit show on the road."
heyyyy everyone it's been a while! sorry, i've been so busy, but consider this a holiday present! i hope that whatever you celebrate was relaxing, fun, and safe!
let me know your thoughts!!!
love,
r