harry doesn't know how he got here, but he's apparently at a party. he's drunk out of his mind, he sees a few familiar faces but he's not sure. someone passes him a cigarette, he's not usually a smoker but he smokes. another person gives him a pill, they said it would make him happy so he takes it.
he's throwing up in a strangers bathroom. his stomach doesn't feel good, this can't be normal. everything is hazy, he's dizzy. he manages to walk out of the bathroom, he washes his face to make him feel better. it doesn't.
he stumbles till he's back to the living room. he's so tired. he's so dizzy. but at least he can't think at his stage. his phone keeps ringing, he wonders who is calling him. he can't bring himself to answer, he's not sure if he can even use it.
he's being dragged away by someone he thinks he knows. he's being yelled at, he doesn't know who it is but their angry face is funny to him so he chuckles.
"you think this is funny?" the person asks.
he's taken away to a different room, and the next thing he knows he's being dunked on cold ice water in a bathtub. he screams.
"c-cold," he shivers.
"good," the person says. he doesn't seem to like him. harry frowns. he feels a slap on his face. "are you with me?"
harry nods. some things are beginning to make sense.
"you're the messiest person i've ever met," the person says. harry knows him. he knows him very well, but his brain is being a bit slow to process what his senses are seeing.
"do you get off by doing this shit? making everyone around you worry? making people fall in love with you only to treat them like they don't matter?" he asks. "like they never mattered?"
"you're like sugar. we know how unhealthy it is for us, but yet we still crave it. that's what you do harry, you make people crave you," he continues. harry's just trying to get his brain to resume working. "i know i can never have you. i don't know why i still do."
he's being taken back to the bedroom and led to lay down on the bed.
"i crave you. i truly do," he says. he leaves a kiss on the corner of harry's lips and tucks him in the bed. "you won't remember this when you wake up. you're so out of it."
"i'll call niall to come get you," he says. that's the last thing harry hears before he falls unconscious.
the next time he opens his eyes, he sees niall on the bed laying next to him. he notices when harry wakes up and smiles.
"hey, you're up," he says.
harry avoids eye contact with him, feeling insanely guilty.
"i'm sorry," he apologizes.
"it's okay. see, this is just a minor setback, we'll get right back on track. i'm still proud you came this far,"
"niall... please don't cuddle me," harry says.
"i'm not trying to," niall says, but the sad smile he gives harry let's him know otherwise.
"how'd you know to find me here?" he asks. he can barely remember what happened before niall came. he doesn't even know how he got to this room. but he can remember someone trying to help him.
"let's get you home," niall says, changing the subject.
"niall," harry says, wondering why niall doesn't want to tell him. "was zayn here? did he call you?"
"no, harry," he says.
harry frowns. "i remember someone else bringing me here."
"well i can say for sure that it wasn't zayn. and why would it be him anyway? are you guys talking again?"
harry whimpers at the question. the realization of what happened the previous day dawns on him. meeting his former step-brother again, bailing on his date with zayn. he wants to reach for a bottle again and get wasted till he forgets.
"we were going to get back together," harry says, tears gathering around the corner of his eyes. "but i messed up."
"harry, you need to forget about him," niall says. "he always makes you act like this. i know you're still in love with him, but he makes you spiral."
harry shakes his head. "zayn wasn't the reason i relapsed."
"then what was?"
harry doesn't respond. niall doesn't know about his past and zeke. he thinks that would be too much, he's so ashamed of it he can't handle other people knowing about it. he trusts niall with everything but not this.
niall sticks to his assumption about zayn having something to do with harry going back to drinking. it's the only thing that makes sense to him. harry was on the right path before whatever happened between them. zayn probably hurt him again. he's consoled his friend so many times in his relationship with zayn. he never liked the way zayn treated harry and harry never saw a problem with it too because he thought he deserved it because he cheated. the relationship wasn't healthy in niall's opinion, always breaking up and getting back together again is a sure sign of an unhealthy relationship.
niall is a good friend. he tries his best to console harry, meanwhile harry was just looking forward to him letting him be so he can drink again without judgement.
...
zayn spent his weekend doing nothing but listening to music and smoking weed. he feels like he just got his heart broken again. after the night harry bailed on their date, he's been too sad to do anything. he said he wasn't going to text or call harry again because it's clear that he's already made his choice and his choice is clearly not zayn but he couldn't help caving and calling him. but harry never answered his call.
now he understands how harry felt when he kept trying to get a hold of zayn after their relationship first ended. thinking too much is making him more upset so he decides to go for a walk and change his environment. he walks out of his apartment door but bumps into someone on his way out. he recognizes them.
"caleb?"
"hi zayn," caleb says.
"what are you doing here?" zayn asks.
"i wanted to see you. can i come in?" he asks.
zayn nods. so much for changing environment, he thinks as they walk back into his apartment. caleb sits on his couch.
"you never responded to my text," caleb says. "i was worried about you."
"i'm sorry. that was shitty of me," zayn says. "i didn't mean to make you worried."
"it's alright. i'm glad you're fine," caleb replies. "so..."
"caleb," zayn starts. "about your messages."
"stop. i already know where this is heading. you're going to reject me, aren't you?"
"i'm sorry. but you were right the first time. i'm still in love with harry," zayn admits. caleb clenches his fists together.
"why?" he asks. there's tear drops gathering around his eyes. "what does he have that i don't?"
"caleb... that's not how it works," zayn says, feeling guilty.
"is it because of sex? because we can't have it?" caleb says, trying to shift closer to him. zayn maintains the distance.
"no. of course not," zayn says. "caleb, you broke up with me. you must have already known deep down that we weren't going to work out."
"i broke up with you because i wanted you to try to win me back! i broke up with you because i thought you would want me more. you kept on wanting him after you broke up so i thought you would do the same for me," caleb says. "that was the biggest mistake i've made and i regret it. zayn, we're a perfect match. can't you see?"
"you deserve someone better than a guy who's still hung up on his ex. caleb, i used you as a distraction to stop thinking about him," zayn confesses.
"i don't care. i just want to be with you," he says. "keep using me."
"i'm not going to do that," zayn shakes his head.
caleb moves closer to him. "you had no problem doing it before."
"i didn't realize i was doing it back then,"
"i did," caleb says. "i still loved you regardless of that."
"caleb, you deserve better. that's not love,"
"then what is love? what you have with harry? zayn, he cheated on you repeatedly," caleb says. "you deserve better too so using your logic, that isn't love either."
"i slept with him," zayn admits. this could be the only way caleb could back off. "the day you sent me that text, i was with him."
caleb moves back, looking surprised. his expression quickly turns to one of sadness, he stares at his hands for a bit, they're shaking.
"and now? are you with him?" he asks.
"no," zayn says sadly.
"you said you didn't have a problem with me being celibate, but the moment we break up you go have sex with him,"
"we can have sex too," caleb adds. "i love you zayn. i'll do anything to keep you, even letting you take my virginity."
"no, caleb. stop it," zayn says.
caleb closes the distance between them and kisses zayn. zayn pulls away.
"this isn't you caleb. you're going to regret this," zayn says.
"okay," caleb says, with his face flushed. "okay. i'm going to accept that we're no longer together and i won't bother you anymore. but i want to have this."
"i always wanted my first time to be with someone i love," caleb adds.
"but you wanted to save yourself till marriage,"
"i was waiting for the right person. but it doesn't matter because i'm not going to love someone else like this," caleb says. "so please... zayn. let me just have this from you."
"what if you regret it?"
"i won't," caleb insists.
"give me some time to think about it," zayn says.
"what's there to think about? you've done this countless of times with harry, right?"
"i've never done something like this before. i don't want you to regret it too, so maybe we should both think about it," zayn says. he's sexually attracted to caleb of course, but he also doesn't want to have sex with him. he feels like it could over complicate things.
plus he's still hoping somehow things between him and harry would magically work out, even though that's very unlikely. harry won't reply his messages, so it's obvious he wants nothing to do with zayn again.
and it's frustrating because he doesn't understand what he did that got harry to act like this. they were getting along well, and it seemed like this time things were really going to be different between them. it was the first time he actually forgave harry for cheating on him, even though he's taken him back lots of times before.
"i won't regret it," caleb says. "just think about it."
he leaves after zayn doesn't say anything else. zayn opens his phone to see if he has any new messages from harry. he doesn't. he decides to text him again, but this time he makes his tone sound a bit different.
zayn: i'm worried. i thought something happened to you but justin told me he saw you at a party, i'm not sure if he's telling the truth or not. but i hope you're fine, please respond.
zayn: i'm sorry if i said anything to hurt you. and i'm sorry if you feel spammed by my continuous messages. just let me know you're okay. call me or text me.
...
harry gets to his apartment by himself. he convinced niall that he was going to be fine and he just wanted to sleep so he could be alone. niall left him alone with a frown.
he walks up his apartment, excited about opening a new bottle so he wouldn't have to think so much. specifically about zayn, and how guilty he feels for not showing up.
but it's for the best, he was only going to hurt zayn again. he opens the door to his apartment, walking in. he hears a sound, his television is on. someone is in his apartment. he walks into his living room, not even surprised to find zeke there.
"why're you still here?"
"did you think you could get rid of me that easily?" zeke responds. he walks over to harry, he's one of the few people that can tower over him. he's freakishly tall, and he hates to admit it but also attractive. too bad he's a dick.
"you wanted to see me suffer. you have, now leave me alone," harry says, walking away to his kitchen to get one of the drinks he bought the previous day. zeke follows him.
"what's going on with you?" zeke asks, actually looking concerned. he plays the role well but harry knows him well enough to know he doesn't care about anything but seeing harry in pain.
"i'm not as drunk as i want to," harry replies. he gets a cup to pour himself a glass but decides on it and just gulps it straight from the bottle.
"what are you? some type of alcoholic now?"
"yes," harry admits. "and i hope it eventually kills me."
"i don't like this," zeke says.
harry chuckles. "so you care about me now?"
"it's no longer fun to mess with you if you're like this. you've lost the fight in you," zeke says. "which is disappointing because i was looking forward to playing with you for longer."
"oh well. guess you should leave now," harry says.
"nah," zeke says. he pulls harry by his waist. "tell me what's bothering you."
harry pushes him away. "don't fucking touch me."
zeke smirks, cornering him. "that's more like it. resist me more, c'mon it turns me on."
harry's face turns red in anger. he pushes zeke away and runs to his room, locking the door behind him. zeke follows him, banging at the door.
"you can't stay in there forever," zeke says.
"sure i can. i've got everything i need in here," he says. he managed to run with the bottle, he's probably going to get drunk and then pass out after a couple of hours. zeke would get too bored and eventually leave, like he always does.
even though he hates his former step-brother's guts, he still finds a comfort in his presence. it reminds him of how things were a couple of years ago, when he still had his mom and a family, though non-functional. it makes him feel nostalgic at how familiar everything is.
zeke becomes quiet after a while, making harry believe that he's actually left. but he refuses to open the door just in case he's just faking it. after a while he hears footsteps.
"you left your phone here and it's unlocked," zeke says. "got a couple of messages from zayn. aww, sounds like he really likes you. he seems worried, if only he knew the true you he'll probably be disgusted and never want to speak to you again."
"shut up," harry says. he knows zeke is trying to use his phone as bait to get him out.
"i'm gonna respond since you apparently don't care," zeke says. harry can't resist it. he falls for the bait and opens the door.
"give me back my phone," he seethes.
"too late," zeke smirks. he hands harry back his phone. it's open on the message thread. "i sent it before i told you about the phone obviously, i'm not new to this."
harry: hey sorry i haven't responded. i've been busy getting gangbanged by monster cocks 👅🍆 unlike your 5 inch pecker that doesn't satisfy me 🤧🤧 also you're ugly and short and not my type 🙅🏻♂️🚫. i like huge men that aren't afraid to slap me around 🙇🏻👋 , choke me and tie me up. i've got a piss kink🥴 and i like to be fisted by at least four huge hands and you've got twigs so bye. ✌️😘 come talk to me when your dick grows twenty inches 😏🤧😈
"what the fuck?!" harry screams at the top of his lungs. he can't believe he resisted not talking to zayn for this long only for this to be the first message that zayn receives from him after he stood him up.
he pours out his anger unto the person that caused it in the first place and punches him.
"i can't believe i keep letting you ruin my life," he says, hitting him.
"hey, calm down. it's just a joke,"
"everything's a joke to you! this is my life! you've fucked up everything for me," harry starts to cry. his face is red with embarrassment and anger. "please get out. please."
zeke contemplates. he doesn't like the defeated look on harry's face even if that's what he wanted.
"i'll be back. learn to take a joke," zeke says, walking out the door.
harry sobs when he's alone. he gets a notification alert. he panics, he's scared to know zayn's response. he should just block him so he never has to see it.
or he could go to zayn's house to explain it.
but he could risk mentioning zeke. he has to come up with an explanation that makes sense.
i was drunk.
well that's semi-true, he is drunk. but it's also bullshit because zayn knows how he is when he's drunk and he definitely doesn't act like that.
or, he could destroy his phone. and tell zayn that it got stolen so he probably received a text message from the thief.
that seems more plausible.
he shakes his head, zayn is way too smart to fall for that. he takes a couple more shots from his bottle to kill his nerves.
he's going to go over to see zayn.
and things would hopefully turn out well.
even though it never does.
...
hope y'all are good!