Calista awoke to the steady gait of someone walking.
Blinking heavy eyelids open, she yawned, fingers bumping against something fuzzy as she stretched.
"Wha—" She struggled for a second against the strong arms supporting her back and knees.
"Don't move... too much." Came the quiet plea from above her.
Ceasing her squirming, Calista gazed up at Shin-ah curiously as he walked away from their friends still sleeping underneath the trees. "Where are we going?"
He carried her through the forest to a destination she couldn't see. Her injured arm was draped carefully over her stomach, legs swinging as he strode through the trees. Sunlight peeking through the leaves dotted the grass under his feet in shimmering gold and a light breeze blew lazily through the woods.
The tranquility was almost enough to make her forget what happened yesterday.
Almost.
Her heart started to beat faster at how close the call was. How close she came to losing him. Weakly, she clung to his robe, needing the reassurance that he was still here.
Still breathing.
The trees thinned out as he started to slow and she faintly heard the bubbling of rushing water. Twisting her head around, she nearly fell out of Shin-ah's hold in her excitement, momentarily forgetting her wounds and thinking that they were about to go swimming. His arms tightened around her to keep her secure and she couldn't prevent the wide grin that split across her face.
"The river?!"
Even though his eyes were obscured from her vision by his mask, a small smile tipped up the edge of his mouth. "Yoon said... to keep it clean..."
At the mention of cleaning it in the freezing water, she stiffened, smile disappearing instantly. Shin-ah hushed her softly, nudging his nose against her temple comfortingly.
"... I'll be gentle." He murmured softly in her ear.
Calista managed a wobbly smile as he set her down on her feet. Her knees buckled when they hit the ground though, and she braced her good arm on the grass to keep steady.
Shin-ah tried to help her, but she pushed him away, gritting her teeth with pained effort as she awkwardly crawled toward the stream.
I can do this much... I don't want to be helpless.
She yelped as she dipped a hand in, but it was ice cold and she backpedaled so fast that she lost her balance. She would have fallen if the man behind her didn't catch her in time, and fully aware of that fact, she smiled up at him sheepishly.
He didn't say anything, but his shoulders were tense.
After examining her to ensure that she hadn't hurt herself further, he helped her right herself, now being met with no resistance.
Carefully, he maneuvered her so that she was sitting by the edge of the river. Deft but gentle fingers unwound Yoon's handiwork from last night to reveal the bloody wound oozing a disgusting mixture of blood and something else he couldn't identify.
He frowned deeply. He didn't know that there was such a thing as white blood.
"It looks like pus." Calista noted with a resigned sigh, sensing his confusion.
Seeing her wound for the first time in daylight made bile rise in her throat for reasons she couldn't fathom. She was no stranger to injury, on both the recipient end and she had witnessed fatal violence many times over. So she did not know why this was so jarring.
"It's a sign of infection."
She regretted it when he immediately moved to run in the opposite direction, most likely to get the pretty boy.
"Wahh!! Shin-ah, it's fine, it's fine!!" She scrambled forward clumsily, definitely not wanting to get scolded so early in the day. "Ack, wait!! It's just gotta be clean first, it's not that big of a deal!!"
Please don't leave me alone!! Huh, I'm being quite selfish, right? I'm sorry...
After a lot of convincing, he finally stopped fighting her and she breathed a sigh of relief.
She had slept with the sling last night, a bit reluctantly, so that she didn't jostle it too much and rip out the stitches. But the thing was unbelievably uncomfortable and she had the most difficult time falling asleep last night.
Calista shivered as the crisp morning air consumed her being, chilling her to the bone as Shin-ah carefully removed her clothes. The fabric wound around her chest was incredibly dirty and in desperate need of a wash, but the man across from her couldn't bring himself to remove it.
The bright red on his cheeks would have been hysterical if she had enough energy to laugh.
She winced as he gently dipped her arm into the crystal clear water.
He murmured apologies as she flinched when the frigid water made contact with her open wound. Gently, with the utmost care, he thoroughly cleaned the area. The river ran red as both dried and fresh blood were carried away by the stream.
Calista bit down on her lip to prevent her from crying out as the stinging sensation transformed into a full blown, crippling agony. She turned her face away from him, not wanting him to see her in such a state of vulnerability.
Tears slipped down her cheek with no regard to her wishes. But the warm palm that cradled her face urged her to look at him and she complied, eyes downcast in shame.
I'm so weak.
A thumb lifted to gently brush it away and she tearfully chuckled.
"You're being awfully careful with me, Shin-ah." She tried to tease but it came out more like a grimace.
It didn't matter how small the movements were, it still hurt like hell.
He gently lifted her arm out of the water. Fumbling with her satchel that he had brought along with them set down by his side, he pulled out some bandages, ointment and something that had her backing away instantly.
"No, no, no." She shook her head furiously as Shin-ah made no move to advance towards her, picking up on her distress. "Save it for the others."
In his hand were a couple small sprigs of the senjusou herb.
"Calista..." He started exasperatedly, pleas falling on deaf ears.
"No." She reiterated firmly. "I don't need it."
His brow furrowed in displeasure but otherwise didn't push her. Yet.
Setting it back in the bag, he scooted closer to her so that their legs were touching. He fiddled with the roll of cotton for a few seconds, unsure of where the end was and in his growing annoyance, he tore off the bandage covering his eyes.
Bringing the offending gauze impossibly close to his face to spot the elusive and frayed end somehow still escaping his enhanced sight, his mind went blank at the sound of giggles filling the air.
Calista sputtered as his usually emotionless face creased in frustration.
"You were beaten by cotton." She giggled childishly and his ears turned pink.
Her laughter faded away as he didn't share in her humor but she had no time to feel self-conscious about it before his face was a millimeter away from hers.
Squeaking in surprise, she automatically leaned back but he had anticipated that move.
While his right hand was planted firmly on the ground next to her hip to keep her from falling too far back, the other held onto her injured arm to prevent her from wounding it any further.
She stuttered out his name nervously, wondering why her heart was racing so fast and how to get her mind off of how his warm breath fanned out across her skin.
"You laughed..." He mumbled, but didn't move an inch.
He peered at her closely, unblinking.
Calista's silver eyes were wide open and she didn't have any control over her body. None of her limbs would obey her command but unlike their first introduction in the caves, she was not afraid of the man who held power over her.
She was nervous, but because of the way her heart fluttered when he was close to her. She thought that it would have faded with time, and yet...
It only seemed to grow stronger with each passing day.
A while ago, I would have considered my implicit trust a bad thing, but now, I do not think so...
His body heat shook her out of her thoughts. She glanced up to see that he had crowded in closer, her head almost knocking into his at the sheer proximity.
Shin-ah couldn't form the words he wanted to say so instead, his tongue spilled out what the dam had been holding in.
He blurted out, "I thought I would never hear that sound again."
All hints of her self-consciousness died in that instant as she saw sparkling drops of water fall from his eyes. Her nose scrunched up and her lower lip trembled. Tears streamed down her face, mirroring his.
"I'm sorry..." Her heart broke at his quiet cries and she wished now more than ever before that she had the ability to take his pain away. "I didn't mean to upset you but I don't regret what I did."
"... Why?" He asked her, voice breaking.
Why did you do it? I could have lost you...
He wouldn't meet her gaze and nervously, she brushed her hair that had fallen into her face behind her ear.
"Shin-ah..." She shook her head slightly, as if she knew he wouldn't like what she had to say. "I will always protect you."
"No!!" He protested through his tears, shaking his head furiously. "Not like this!!"
Not with your life!!
Calista's eyes were sympathetic and filled with an emotion he didn't understand.
His head fell into her neck, voice muffled. "I... I almost lost you. Again."
The defeat and helplessness made her shrink back but his arms wrapped around her waist and he pressed her close to him.
"Shin-ah, look at me." She stated firmly, leaning her forehead against his. "I will always do what's necessary to protect you. I couldn't bear it if I lost you."
He sniffled, golden eyes shiny with fresh tears as he cried harder, throwing himself down in her lap.
Her gaze softened and she stroked his hair, easing him through the distress.
"I don't want you to die..." Shin-ah whimpered, body trembling with sobs. "Please."
It was my job to keep you safe. I need you to be safe.
Rocking him back and forth, she comforted him as he released all the pent up emotion that had been building inside of him since that battle.
She thought about what to say.
It only pierced my arm.
I'm still alive, don't worry.
Rather me than you.
But nothing seemed right.
It was because she knew nothing was guaranteed on the battlefield. That no one was invincible and that life could be snuffed out in a second without giving anyone a chance to do anything about it.
Deep down, she couldn't promise him anything.
"It's alright..." She whispered softly. "I'm here, Shin-ah..."
She had lost track of how much time had passed but eventually his cries ceased and her tears dried up, leaving behind streak marks as evidence. He sat up, shuffling as close to her as he possibly could.
They both needed each other.
A bit calmer now, he moved purposefully but slowly to apply the ointment before wrapping a new bandage around her arm. It wasn't bleeding heavily, but he still wiped the blood that had budded from the neat stitching of Yoon's handiwork. No words were exchanged between the two of them, but she noticed that his breathing had evened out.
Although it seemed like he should've been knocking into her wounds left and right, his motions were fluid.
The shaking of his fingers was barely noticeable to her now.
"Were you hurt at all?" Calista asked him, arching an eyebrow in disbelief as he shook his head a little too fast for her liking. "Shin-ah."
He froze at the knowingness in her eye, corner of his mouth lifting upward in the most adorable lopsided smile she had ever seen, as if he could convince her to drop the subject.
It didn't work on her though.
"Let me see." She demanded, now that he was done treating her wounds.
Hesitantly, he undressed his upper half, revealing pale skin and toned muscles to her eyes.
Her knuckles turned white before she forced them to unfurl, raising it to trace the small slashes on his upper arm and chest that had already scarred over.
Hand snaking back to rub the back of his neck, she looked up at him worriedly. "Are you okay?"
He nodded, trying not to dwell on how her touch was lighting up his skin. Covering his hand over hers, he brought it around his head, lips brushing the inside of her wrist.
Calista swallowed hard, silver eyes flitting about as she attempted to hide her blush. "Are... Are y-you hurt anywhere else?"
He shook his head.
She narrowed her eyes at him. "Don't lie to me, Shin-ah."
Stubbornly, he lifted the wretched sling, holding it out to her.
Pushing out her bottom lip in the best pout she could muster, she rounded her eyes, blinking up at him through her lashes.
He faltered for a moment and she seized the opportunity to fling the horrendous thing far away. But he caught it swiftly and held it in front of her once again.
"Take it..." He implored her with steely eyes once she opened her mouth to protest and her eyes widened, not used to seeing such blatant resolve from him so openly. "And I will show you."
Reluctantly, she caved in and allowed him to strap it onto her shoulder, grimacing as he placed her arm in the restrictive sling. True to his word, he rolled up his left pant leg, revealing bruised markings and a faint scar on his ankle.
She leaned forward, brow knitting. "That's... not from yesterday, is it?"
To her surprise, he bowed his head and didn't say anything.
"Shin-ah...?"
He fixed his golden gaze on her, resting his elbows on his knees.
"You have to promise." He articulated, enunciating it clearly. "... To not blame yourself for it."
But even as she agreed, that didn't stop her expression from falling and her eyes welling up with tears once more.