Sunghoon p.o.v
That next day I received a call from my manager saying if I could do some run-through. I toss my phone back from my bed glancing at the wall clock that says 2PM
(yeah put yo' hands up put your hands up -p-p-p-p put ~~) yeah whatever, back to the story
I did some chores before I bid my mom goodbye, I was determined to see Jake again for the last time even if it meant putting my pride down
By exactly 3 I was there, it was Tuesday and I was positive he would be out by 5 so I had 1hr to spare and practice what I had to say
When I hear the final bell for extra-curricular, I felt my heart beating faster; my palms were all sweaty and I could feel a bit a lot of air from my chest. As I've noticed Jake from afar, I was expecting him to look this way, the usual place I always stand whenever I fetch him
But sadly he didn't spare one look
I cross the road putting my hands inside my coat before following them, when Niki acknowledge my presence Jake immediately followed his direction seeing me
His face was not puffy like mine; it's like he hasn't shed one tear at all
He wasn't mad
But one clear emotion I see,
Is sad
"Can we talk?" Jake looks at Niki for permission before Niki excused himself and left
I don't know why I did that maybe because old habits die hard, I suddenly reached out for Jake's backpack ---,
"Aniyo" when he flinches sideways away from me not wanting to be touched
"S-sorry" We walked from around the school to a nearby playground and settled in one of those swings
Silence engulfed that I had no memory of what I just practiced an hour ago. When I faced Jake his head just hung low that he can't stop staring at the hot beverage I just got him
I stood up, went to him before crouching down, I carefully held both of his hands before looking at him sadly, but before I can even start
Jake lets go of my hand before standing; turning his back against me
"You can talk without touching me" His voice was changed
The Jake I once knew who had a sweet loving voice, looks at me like I wasn't someone dear to him
"I-I'm sorry"
My voice cracked the moment I uttered those longed painful words I wanted to say to Jake. I tried composing myself again before looking straight at his affronted expression
Tears were visibly at the corner of his eyes; trying his best not to cry before I held both of his crossed arms as he yanked it away this time
"I- I just don't understand why you'd do that to me Sunghoon" --,
"You obviously know it's making me uncomfortable having Sunoo around and still you --"
Jake suddenly stopped, as he pressed the back of his hands against his nose to stop him from sniffing before I see fresh tears escaped his eyes
The prolonged tears I have to endure gushed down continuously; breaking down with Jake as I look away to conceal it from him. It was not helping to see him cry like this in front of me it makes everything so painful
We both break down at the same time, not knowing if this talk would solve everything or could worsen the situation
I turned around as more tears shed not wanting to let Jake see me like this so he can stop crying as well. When I was ready to talk again Jake held into his knees for support while he punches his chest lightly to breathe properly
"Oh my god Jake"
I immediately brought Jake to my back and rushed to the nearest hospital there is. Setting him down to one of the hospital beds and being taken to the emergency sets off another heartbreaking moment for me
"Are you a relative?" the nurse asked, as I gulped down my saliva shooking my head
For half an hour Jake's mom appeared as I stood up when she cupped my face setting off a reassuring smile
In my peripheral vision, another man rushed down running towards my direction, and before he clutches my collar harder
"WHAT THE HELL SUNGHOON?! DIDN'T I TELL YOU STAY AWAY?!" Jay shouted earning a couple of stares from the people around us as I stayed crumpled like I have no energy to fight off with him
"Jay stop it, any of this is isn't a good help for Jake"
He lets go harshly before the doctor got out of the emergency, I immediately rushed to him
"He's fine for now, it's just one of his Anxiety attacks, is there anything that keeps on bothering him? stressing him out?"
ME?
I thought, Jay looks at me as I stayed low guiltily
His mother doesn't want to pin this on me because she knows I am suffering too, I am hurting too, while she explains what Jake's recent activity
I rushed out f the place wanting to make a stop in all of this
When I arrived at Sunoo's place it was quiet, as usual. Until I heard his phone rang, I didn't even answer the call not wanting to intervene, as I continue to scan the place to look for Sunoo when the caller left a message
"Sunoo-ah how are you? I hope you're done pretending you're sick and come home, we miss you here. Okay uhh - give me a call when you get this"
I turned around to see Sunoo standing behind the staircase, maybe too late to hide his secret
"Is that true?"
"S-sunghoon-ah"
"ANSWER ME DAMN IT!!"
"Neh"
I closed my eyes in irritation sighing hard this time
"I had to do that okay? I had to ---"
"WAEYO UHH?! WHY SUNOO?!!"
"Because I still love you okay? --
I wet my lips; bending my head upwards to stop my self from beating a sick person
"I ALREADY HAVE JAKE, SUNOO!"
"That's my problem okay! I was too confident that you'd still be with me when I get back, But when I heard you already have someone I had to do everything just to get you back"
"Ugh!" I punched the wall in anger before looking back at Sunoo
"Do you even hear yourself?! you're delusion! I should've seen the red flags, then none of this would happen!"
I rushed outside slamming the door hard before running to my house.
After that encounter, I visited the hospital a couple of times but not before being block by Jay several times too. Until one afternoon while I was in practiced I heard my phone rang indicating a call from Jay saying that Jake would like to talk to me
I left in between my practice before rushing to the hospital, while I shrugged a couple of nervous sighs I turned the knob on seeing Jake on the bed looking plainly at the television in front of him, he turned to see me as I forced a simple smile
"I- uhh I got you these flowers"
He nods shortly before I sat down beside the bed. Jake was just looking at me with no single emotion I can call out
"H-how are you?"
"Fine, the doctor said I can leave tomorrow"
I felt a sudden rush of relieved and I started to smile again
This is it Sunghoon, let's make this happen.
Jake called you out here for a reason
Do it right this time
Apologized for everything and make things right this time
Okay, here we go
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"Let's break up Sunghoon"
"W-what?"
My heart starts racing upon hearing Jake said those words
"I've been thinking about it and I think it's the best way to solve it"
I scoffed nervously "Jake if this is about Sunoo it's fine I've dealt with it --"
"This is not just about Sunoo, it's about us and you" ---,
"Cause it seems like you don't know what you want"
"I KNOW WHAT I WANT JAKE, I WANT YOU, I WANT US!" tears gush down as I try to defend our sinking relationship
"so you're just throwing this relationship away?"
"I wasn't the one who made a mistake here"
"I know! that's why I'm apologizing, I'm making it right, I'm saving what's left in our relationship cause I still want to make this work!"
"YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND SUNGHOON! I'm the only one who's left holding onto a rope that is continuously hurting me, and the most painful thing I had to accept, is that you clearly see I am hurting, and yet you did nothing"
I was quite surprised when Jake suddenly held my hand; caressing it as if it was the most fragile thing he ever held
"I'm tired of fighting for something I know I can't win Sunghoon....First love is the hardest to compete with"
"But I don't want ---
"Even if you don't want to, I'm done fighting Sunghoon-ah"
"I'm Sorry"
I was about to talk when the nurse came in for his check-up, I stay still at the side seeing Jake laying flat on the hospital bed with a plain expression looking down the floor
I rushed out of the hospital; clicking harshly on the elevator button before it starts to stop. I felt myself burning inside, I can't explain the feeling but it continuously eating all my positive emotions inside
Swinging the door from the emergency exit, I look up and started at the couple turns of stairs before it leads to the rooftop. I felt fresh tears sliding down my cheeks before I harshly wipe them out; running fast on top
As I open the door the fresh breeze from the top view of Seoul welcomed me, I look from my left and run near the railings with beads of sweat and a bundle of fresh new tears
"AHHHHHHH!!!!"
I screamed in desperate cries before collapsing on the floor sobbing as I try to catch my breath
When I got home, my mother called me to give me the possible contests I'll be joining next week. Since I haven't been active on my training and been skipping run-through, but that didn't stop me. To clearly keep this pain away I had to dedicate it in my work
And just like that, I was back to the same Sunghoon
Practice, practice, and more practice. I even lost all of my weight for not eating and just sticking with bread and cocoa
I always practiced the whole day, it's like I rarely have time to go home. I did accept the offer for the semi-finals, and now I am facing a real challenge. The finals
It wasn't an easy drive for me, people say I was called in because our coach had a close grip with one of the panelists. That caught me off guard and had me questioned my skills considering I made a couple of mistakes compared with others and yet I still managed to beat them all
"Sunghoon-ah take a break you might hurt yourself"
"Ani, just a few practices I'll be fine"
"Well, Yohan here is going to judge your performance"
I smiled at Yohan sunbaenim before hugging him.
"Give them a hell of a performance" we both chuckled before I tying my shoelaces
After my run-through, Yohan hyung congratulated me as he records my performance, while I start packing my bag some of my best competitors arrived for their practiced run-through
One person who can always provoke me to life
He belongs to the group called ASTRO, they are all candidates for best performance but because of his god-given looks and ability, he gets more attention and luck.
He won every regional for 5 straight years, it's my third time this year if I lose against him again.
I don't know why I can't even tear my gaze at him, when his eyes meet mine, he did his signature smirk before approaching me
DEAR GOD HELP ME
"I heard you're competing against me this year," He said bending his neck further down to see my reaction
I faced straight when that happened before facing him with an i-don't-care- look
"You heard right"
"You sure you can beat me this time kid?"
"Beat you? I can crush you"
He laughed wryly
I looked at him ina most disappointed look, feeling a bit insult
"I don't think I was trying to be funny," I said in a serious tone
"Well, you were" He was about to swing his duffel bag to his shoulder when I beat him to it,
I pulled him from his bag before he hastily looks at me, a perfect shot for me to land my fist against his face. When he was down I got on top of him before clutching his collar continuing my punch as harder than before
People scram to help and control the situation before Yohan hyung himself limps towards me and pulls me out of the fight
I was reprimanded by the staff and was subjected to not be 5 meters near the group ASTRO.
"What the hell was that Sunghoon! You're a minor!"
"hyung that's fine, if I were him I'd beat the shit out of that guy's face too" Yohan defended as we both look at each other earning the same look of i-got-you-back always
"You're not helping right now Yohan"
Our manager paces back and forth in front of us before he stops to look at me in the eye,
"You want to beat that guy? Do it in the skating rink"
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HAPPY D-DAY MY LOVELY ENEGEN'S, I KNOW EM SO LATE MIANHEE ~~
JUST LOOKING AT OUR BOYS MAKES ME THINK THEY WERE BORN NATURALLY TO BE ON STAGE 😭😭❤️❤️❤️