Previously... David and Sarah consummated their relationship. 😏
Then Davey said the LBOMB and we were all like GASP... 😯
If this doesn't sound familiar read the previous chapter!
I wake up to David's soft snoring in my ear, his head fits perfectly in my nape. His hot breath fans down my neck. I revel in the way his warm body molds to mine perfectly. Intertwining my hand in his, I bring him closer to me. He instantly tightens his grip on me. I look behind my shoulder and see he's still sleeping.
A smile spreads across my face as I remember everything that happened last night.
He loves me.
I thought that it would freak me out, but it didn't. I didn't say it back, though. Not because I don't feel it. In fact, I think I've known for awhile. I just try my best to show it through everything we do together. I just don't think I am ready to say it.
We haven't even talked about it yet. After my intense orgasms last night, it was like I lost all ability to function. My legs were noodles, my thoughts were jumbled, and I felt high off of us. I was so wrapped around what happened, I didn't even put clothes back on. I closed my eyes and fell asleep fully sated.
The phone on my side table rings loudly, startling me from my thoughts. I quickly grab it and answer in the hopes that David doesn't wake up.
"Hello." I whisper into the phone.
"I'm sorry, did I wake you?" My mom asks through the phone.
"No." I answer softly in the phone. "I was up, but David is sleeping."
"Ooo a sleep over?" My mom teases through the phone.
Cue eye roll.
She laughs into the phone. "I'm just calling to check in. It's about 7 in the morning right now. JJ and I are going to go out for breakfast in an hour, so I'll drop him off around 9:00. Does that work?"
I wipe my face trying to wake myself up. "Yeah, that will work. The zoo doesn't open until 10:00 anyway. Thanks mom."
"Of course, sweetie!" She cheers. "Enjoy the rest of the morning. See you soon." She says before hanging up.
I stretch to put my phone back on the side table causing my lower half to push into David. I give a little yelp at the morning wood poking into me.
I hear a light chuckle and I turn to see David with a smirk on his face, but his eyes still closed.
I turn fully toward him, our noses touching.
"Are you awake?" I ask him.
"No." He answers still not opening his eyes. "I'm sleeping, leave me alone." He teases.
"Oh, my bad." I sit up, "I guess I'll just put my clothes back on and let you sleep."
His eyes shot open. "I'm awake!" He surrenders as he pulls me back down into his chest. His arms tighten around me causing my face to squish against his warm chest as he kisses the top of my head.
A giggle escapes me at his dramatics.
I try and wiggle out of his strong hold only a little bit, so that I can see his handsome face. "Last night was amazing." I say looking up at him.
"It really was." He says smiling down at me.
We fall in a comfortable silence for a little bit as I trace circles on his chest.
"So..." I say hesitantly. "Are we going to talk about what you said last night?" I ask as I watch the goosebumps form on him as a result of my touch.
His breath hitches at my question. "You heard that?"
I bite my lip. "It was hard not to."
He takes a deep breath. "I just got caught up in the moment." He confesses.
My heart falls. Do I believe him? I don't know. Do I wish he meant it? Absolutely.
"Oh." I say softly.
He taps my chin to look up at him.
"Can we just pretend it didn't happen?" He asks.
I can't hide the hurt on my face... and he sees it.
"That's not what I meant." He tries to clarify. "It's just—" he drags his hands down his face. "It's a big thing to say, and it's embarrassing that it was said for the first time mid climax."
I nod my head, still not satisfied with his answer. But that's the feeling of rejection.
"Sarah," he says giving me a kiss. "It's hard to describe how much I feel for you." He rubs my cheeks with the pad of his thumb, as he tries to think of what to say. "it's just not how I imagined saying it to you. Can we just not talk about it until we're both ready to say it?"
His words only calmed me a little, but it was the honesty in his eyes and his gentle touch that put me at ease.
I lay my head back down on his chest as he begins to run his fingers up and down my spine. Each lap he moves further down. When he finally makes it the dimples right above my butt, I can't hold back anymore. He's teasing me.
I look up and see a devilish grin on his face.
"Okay, let's not talk." I say before kissing him fervently.
His hands wrap into my hair and he pulls lightly causing me to moan.
An image of me riding him pops into my head. There's no turning back now.
I pull away slowly. "You know what really I want to do?" I say with a sly smile before straddling him. I touch his ear with my mouth and whisper, "something I haven't done in so long." I put his ear in between my teeth and give him a light nibble. I can feel his hardness against me and I instinctively grind myself against him.
A soft cry leaves my lips at the sensation.
"I think I may have an idea." He struggles to say because of the friction between my wetness and his stiffness.
I am so glad we're both naked.
"You got to be on top last night." I whisper against his lips. "Now it's my turn." I add before crashing my lips against his. My tongue slides into his mouth and meets his and if I wasn't already turned on, this would have done that.
His penis puts a delicious amount of force against my clit causing me to moan and my hips jerk. The feeling makes me ache more with need.
"I need more." I whine before my hands find his hair and begin to tug. His mouth opens with a grunt and my tongue finds his with greed.
I can't control the rolling of my hips as his hard member slides against my clit with more force and a faster pace.
His hands lightly scratch up and down my back as we continue to assault each other with our mouths.
After heavy groping, rubbing, and breathtaking kisses, I lift my hips and hover just above him. His tip teasing my entrance. Not being able to restrain myself anymore, I sink down onto him and allow him to slide deep inside me.
A soft hum comes from my throat as the overwhelming feeling of him inside me at this angle. I look down at David and see him looking back at me.
"Do I feel good inside of you, Sarah?" He groans.
My eyes roll back as I begin to roll my hips. "Uh huh." I whine in response.
His hands find my ass as he pushes me into him even deeper.
My lips find his again and I moan into his lips as his tongue dives into my mouth.
He thrusts up matching my rhythm as I feel myself tingle around him and feel my pleasure build.
My mouth finds his shoulder as I try to quiet my moans just a little, slightly embarrassed on how loud I'm getting. My mouth is open wide and my teeth slightly dig into him as I let my euphoric wail out.
He weaves his fingers through my hair and lightly pulls my head so we are eye to eye.
"Don't quiet yourself for me." He grunts. "I need to hear you, Sarah." He says as our pace begins to quicken even more.
"David!" I moan. "Tell me your all in this." I beg. "I need you to show me."
"Whatever it takes." He says as he brings my face to his for one last mind blowing kiss that brings us both to bliss as it works in harmony with our movements and emotions.
We both moan into each other's mouths and stare at each other, both our eyes open. We want to see what we do to each other. What we mean to each other.
Even after we finish, we don't disconnect yet. We enjoy the connection we still maintain even without the need to finish again; we relish in the closeness.
:::
Piercing crying.
That's what I'm woken up to again.
I could not have been sleeping that long, right? I mean there is no way.
Looking at the clock, my prediction is confirmed.
3:30 am.
I was only sleeping for 30 minutes.
I get up from bed and sluggishly make my way to the bassinet where my once precious baby is screaming his head off.
"What could you possibly need?" I ask desperately before picking him up in my arms. "You're not dirty and you couldn't actually be hungry, I just fed-" before I could even finish he's rooting around trying to find something to feed his belly... the belly that should be full considering I fed him the last time he was awake. Aren't 2 week old babies supposed to have small stomachs?
I bring him to the rocking chair at the corner of my room and as soon as the boob is out, he quickly latches.
Thank goodness.
Let's just hope these boobs of mine actually give him enough. I look down at him sucking and I can't fight this feeling that I'm letting him down in someway.
My boobs hate me. I am breaking my butt trying to produce enough milk for him. And it's just not good enough. I mean isn't this reason why we have these monstrosities? I've even had to supplement formula to make sure he is getting enough nutrients and that breaks me.
It's been so hard for me to stay positive. I mean not only am I doing this by myself but my body is betraying me.
I can't do this alone. Why did I think I could do this without him?
Tears fall from my eyes at the thought.
James missed everything... and he will continue to miss everything.
JJ is never going to know what it's like to have a father figure in his life. Sure, he has his grandpa, but it's not the same.
James would always talk about spending time with his children. He had so many ideas it was hard to keep track. All of those dreams were ripped from him. He'll never see JJ smile, hear him laugh, and hug him. They'll never play catch, go fishing, and watch sports together. All of which, I can do with him, but would mean so much more to him if his dad was there. Let's just add that to the list of things I can't give my son.
I know what James would be saying to me right now. That it's okay. JJ will have a great life regardless of if he is in it or not, but I don't believe it. Right now, I can't believe it.
I look down at the little baby in my arms and all I can think about is loss.
:::
"Yayyy! We're here!" JJ yells from the backseat as I pull into the parking space.
After David and I spent some alone time together this morning, I fell back asleep and didn't wake up until JJ returned home. I woke up to the rambunctious toddler jumping on my bed yelling, "MOMMY, TIME TO GET UP!" My usual wake up call, so why would I expect anything less from my little prince.
"That's right, buddy." David says as he unbuckles his seat belt and turns around to look back at JJ, "what are you most excited to see?"
"I'm gonna see the zebras, monkeys!" he begins to list off excitedly. "Oo and the lions and tigers and bears!"
"Oh my!" David chimes in cheekily.
A smirk falls on my face as I quickly glance at him, "you did not just do that." I chuckle.
He turns back forward, but keeps his eyes on me and an adorable smirk spread across his face. "I couldn't resist." he shrugs innocently.
"Oh, my! Oh, my! Oh, my!" JJ continues to yell in the back seat followed by uncontrollable giggles.
I lightly hit his side "See what you started!" I shut the car off and unbuckle my seatbelt before making my way to the trunk to get the stroller.
David get JJ out of his car seat and holds his hand as they walk toward me.
"You sure we need that?" David asks.
I roll my eyes and chuckle. "He's 3. Believe me, there is no way he can walk the whole zoo and I'm not carrying him the whole time." I say as I open up the stroller.
"I wanna walk!" JJ says adamantly.
I kneel down to meet him. "That's fine, sweetie, but I'm still going to bring this just incase you change your mind. Okay?" I reassure him.
I give him 20 minutes and then he'll be asking to be in the stroller.
We paid admission and made it past the bears before JJ's feet get tired. "Hold me, mommy." He looks up at me and asks with his big blue eyes.
Before I can protest, David chimes in. "I'll hold you, buddy." He says grabbing JJ and placing the excited toddler on his shoulders.
"Look, mommy." JJ says. "I'm like a monkey." He laughs while making a silly face. "I climb on David!"
I laugh at the sight of JJ rocking back and forth on David's shoulders while making monkey noises. David is being extra careful not to hurt him.
They walk ahead of me and I take in the sight. No, not just David's fine ass. But the way he interacts with JJ, doing things with him I know James would have loved to do. And instead of feeling sadness, I feel joy. Because now, JJ has one more person to have experiences with. And I have a feeling James is watching over us somehow and feeling the same.
We continue through the zoo and I'm surprised by David's endurance. JJ has been on his shoulders for 20 minutes. I'd be dying after 3.
"I'm going to need a massage after today." David says as he winks at me.
I laugh as I shake my head. "Not my problem!" I quip back, "I warned you!"
We find a spot on a bench to sit down for a little bit for a light lunch, followed by a quick bathroom break, before continuing through the zoo. David some how convinced JJ to get back into the stroller so neither of us had to carry him.
As soon as we reach the zebras, thunder strikes and it begins to rain.
"Where did that come from?!" I ask surprised as the rain falls. "The sun was just in the sky." I grunt in frustration. "I even checked the weather like 6 times." I complain.
"Let's not worry about it." David says as he puts his arm around me and places a kiss on head. "JJ looks like he's about to pass out anyway." He laughs as he looks at a tired JJ. "We can go back to my place for a nap time." David offers. He does live pretty close to the zoo.
"Sounds great."
:::
We arrive at David's and the rain has finally slowed down. David takes a sleeping JJ in his arms and we make our way to his apartment.
As we approach I see a tall slender man pacing back and forth in front of David's door.
He spots us and starts stalking toward us before David notices.
"Where the hell have you been?!" The man snaps.
Shock appears on David's face instantly, followed immediately by anger. "What are you doing here?" David heatedly asks before blocking me behind him and covering up JJ protectively.
"Obviously getting my ass wet in the rain." He snaps back. "Because you don't have the decency to check on your mother."
"You need to leave." David says through gritted teeth, without reacting to what the man said.
I place my left hand on David's shoulder as a way to try and provide comfort. I haven't seen him this upset before; he's tense and anxious, his nostrils flaring.
The man's eyes find my engagement ring and wedding bands, I have yet to take off my left hand. "Oh, isn't this lovely." The man chuckles humorlessly. "Sarah, I'm guessing?" He looks at me with cold eyes.
I nod my head not sure how to respond.
"Well isn't that nice." The man barks. "You're playing house?!" He accuses David. "With your dead best friend's fiancé?!" He asks shaking his head with disbelief.
David's rigid face falls and morphs into what I can only describe as guilt. Like he got caught stealing something.
"Excuse me?" I ask chiming in suddenly wanting to protect David from this man. "I am pretty sure David asked you to leave." I snap.
He laughs again, this time I think he's actually laughing at me. "Do you really think this could actually work between you two."
David is silent. He's holding onto JJ for dear life.
"I mean he's the reason your precious James is dead, and you two are fucking!" He yells as he wags a finger between the two of us. "James is probably watching you and is disgusted."
I am seeing red.
"Excuse me?!" I yell. "Who in the hell are you? You do not get to come here and attack us. I don't care who you are, you don't know me and I will not defend my actions to you, because I know what's right. So again, you were asked to leave."
The man looks at David with disbelief in his eyes and an evil smile on his face.
David refuses to make eye contact.
"I know more than you think, darling." He snaps back at me before looking at David menacingly, "And I'm a little offended, son." The man says before looking at me. "Surely, lover boy would have told you about me... his father."
💭 Thoughts?
🧐 Predictions?
Thank you to those still reading after almost 2 months of no update.
~JW