Hard to Love (Bucky Barnes fa...

By Hoe4BuckyBarnes

1.5M 32.4K 40.9K

A/N: first few chapters are a bit 'cringy' with spelling errors (I write this on my phone) but if you can get... More

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Chapter 40
Chapter 41
Chapter 42
Chapter 43
Chapter 44
Chapter 45
Chapter 46
Chapter 47
Chapter 48
Chapter 49
Chapter 50
Chapter 51
Chapter 52
Chapter 53
Chapter 54
Chapter 55
Chapter 56
Chapter 57
Chapter 58
Chapter 59
Chapter 60
Chapter 61
Chapter 62
Chapter 63
Chapter 64
Chapter 65
Chapter 66
Chapter 67
Chapter 68
Chapter 69
Chapter 70
Chapter 71
Chapter 72
Chapter 73
Chapter 74
Chapter 75
Chapter 76
Chapter 77
Chapter 78
Chapter 79
Chapter 80
Chapter 81
Chapter 82
Authors Note...
Chapter 83
Chapter 84
Chapter 85
Chapter 86
Chapter 87 (FINALE)

Chapter 14

25.7K 519 533
By Hoe4BuckyBarnes


"Again." Bruce's voice echoes into the chamber I'm in. He was above me in a safety box watching my analytics on his monitors

I groan in mild frustration. We've been going at this for well over two hours. A little robot assistant brings me an object, Bruce tells me to start, I turn myself and the item invisible, then he watches his screens and jots down results

I'm almost afraid to tell him I'm expanding my force field abilities. I recently found out, by trial and error, that I can use my energy to send out consistent waves and basically fly, among other things. Well, right now it's just floating a few inches off the ground but hey, progress is progress

A small table rolls up to me, but this time it didn't have anything on it for me to pick up. I look up to where Banner was in confusion

"We already tested electronic devices." I shout up to him

"This time don't grab it. We're seeing if you can shift light for objects without physically touching them." I groan louder this time

"Does that mean I have to go through everything AGAIN? We've been at this forever, can I take a break please?"

Bruce doesn't respond, too busy reading over some charts instead. I make a small ball of energy in my hand and casually throw it like I would a baseball at the security glass between us

It rattles the thick resistance glass, causing him to jump. He looks down at me with a frightened expression. I raise my arms as if to say 'well?' He removes his glasses and pinches the bridge of his nose

"Fine, we'll do this later when Tony gets here." He finally speaks into the microphone. I slump my shoulders and exit the room, relief washing over me. Using my ability consistently like that started to drain me

I need some brain food or something

I head straight for the main kitchen as my phone chimes, indicating a text. I pull it out of my back pocket and can't help but to smile

B: how's testing going?

A: Taking a break for now, needed a snack

I get to the kitchen and grab a banana from the fruit basket. I quickly peel it and take a bite. My phone chimes again

B: care to join me on a walk then?

A walk?

I almost want to deny his offer but it is a gorgeous day out. I'd be an idiot if I didn't go out and enjoy it, even for a little bit. I take another bite of my banana, staring at my screen, fiddling with what to respond

I go to take another bite when the sound of someone clearing their throat startles me. I drop my phone on the countertop and look up to find Bucky leaning against the doorframe, watching me intently. He smirks at the banana against my lip

"That should be me." Bucky teases with a playful wink, pointing at the banana as he approaches the island countertop. He leans against it, directly across from me with his arms crossed in front of him

"Could've been this morning." I push a large amount of the fruit in my mouth until it hits the back of my throat earning myself a smirk from him as his cheeks tint a light pink. I get a sense of accomplishment that I can make The Winter Soldier blush and frazzled

Bucky watches with an intense gaze, his eyes darkening. He runs his bottom lip through his teeth as I wrap my lips around the fruit, breaking off the piece that was in my mouth and swallowing it whole

"So about that walk?" I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand. He exhaled deeply composing himself as I threw away the peel

"Right, Yeah, I thought we could walk the trails nearby. Steve says it's gorgeous." Bucky stands straight as I round the corner to be next to him

"I guess I'll tag along. Someones gotta be there incase you fall and break your hip, old man." I chuckle. He huffs in amusement

"Funny. Try to keep up." He turns and walks out the door

I follow close behind, getting a nice view of his ass in thin dark grey jogger style pants the entire walk to the outside security fences. He scans his hand and punches in the security code, allowing the gate to slide open and we exit the perimeter. We walk a bit down the paved road in comfortable silence until we reach a small, almost hidden path

I loved the feel of the sun on me, warming my skin. A gentle breeze kept us cool enough to not start sweating. Or at least to keep me from sweating. It's hard to describe the scent of nature but it was almost intoxicating to me. It was earthy and delicious. The faintest scent of water would reach me every so often in the wind. We walk down the half created path as birds flew over our heads above the trees and small critters scampered in the brush every so often

"So what did you and Romanoff actually talk about this morning?" He asks, slowing down just enough to walk next to me. I hesitate, thinking on how to word my response but decide to just be blunt and straight to the point

"She caught us this morning outside your room," he stiffens at my words. "So she confronted me. I told her near everything, spare the more... intimate subjects." I chuckle

"Is she gonna tell Tony?" He sounds nervous. As he should be if I'm quite honest. We're playing a dangerous game here

"Nope. Because I confronted her about Banner. She's not saying a thing as long as I do the same." I look up at him, squinting as the sun bore down on us. Engulfing our bodies in its blinding rays and seeming to make Bucky shine like a biblical deity, halo and all. He gives me a quick nod, looking back out ahead of him, seeming to not notice my staring

And that was the end of that conversation. We continued walking for a while and Steve was right, the trail was gorgeous. Everything was so lush and alive. The sound of water rushing could be heard nearby. The branches above rustled in the breeze. I felt a hand brush against the back of mine, followed by large fingers curling into my palm before entwining them with my tiny ones. I glance up to see a small smirk on Buckys perfect lips and can't help but to mimic it, also feeling my stomach flutter and my cheeks tinge with heat. And it wasn't from the sun

After a bit of walking, we end up closer to the river. I loved the sounds of the babbling brook, slowing my pace to relish in the noises. Something about water running over pebbles making that trickle and bubble sound always made me feel at peace. The trees opened up around the stream, allowing sunlight to hit us head on as we neared it

"Need a break?" Bucky asks

"Yes please." I sigh, thankful that he offered to stop even though I know he's able to keep going for quiet a while. I on the other hand was getting more and more exhausted and so desperately just wanted to sit down for a few minutes

I sit on one of the larger rocks lining the river and lean back on my hands. Bucky takes the rock next to me, picking up a small stone and skipping it down stream. I watch as it disappears a good distance from us and smirk

"So, tell me more about you." He chimes up after a couple of minutes in silence. I shrug, relaxing more and more as I listen to the gentle rushing of water

"What do you want to know? I'm an open book." I know, I know. Cliché answer but it's true, ask me anything and I'll tell ya

Bucky glances at me, tossing another stone while thinking of what to ask. "Alright then, favorite color?"

"Easy, black." I tilt my head to look at him, waiting for more

"Favorite food or dish?" He skips a stone

"I don't really have a #1 food item or dish. I enjoy most foods all the same." I grab a stone from his hand and skip it. He cracks a smile at my answer

"Alright, alright. Favorite hobby?"

"Don't have one really. All I do is eat, sleep, train and repeat." You might think I'm joking but that's seriously what I do. With an occasional reading of a book that is. I never picked up a hobby, until recently trying to learn Russian. Maybe I should find one now that realize just how boring I must sound

He raises a brow at my answer. "What's your go to movie?" I pause to ponder my answer but come up short

"Can it be a genre of movie or a does it have to be a specific movie?" I grab another stone from him. He shrugs

"Genre."

"Hmmm, it's a tie between Sci-fi and mystery dramas." I toss my last stone, turning to look at him fully. "What's with the 20 questions all of a sudden?" I smile, bumping him with my shoulder. He gives me a shy smirk

"Maybe I want to learn who you really are. Can't exactly get to know someone only by their lips," He looks to my mouth which makes my pulse quicken. I purse my lips together in a tight line as he skips another stone, never looking away from me

"You know so much about me already, figured I should know about you." He continues. I nod in agreement, rubbing my hands up and down my thighs anxiously

He's got a point

"Fair enough. Let's see," I trail off, wondering how far back I should start. "I was born August 17th, 1995. My mom raised me on her own until I was 6. She uh... she died of cancer. She didn't have any family to take me in when she passed so I got put in the foster care system." I sigh at the miserable memories. Images of the orphanage flashing across my mind. Bucky senses my change in attitude and grabs my hand, giving it an attentive squeeze to which I'm thankful for

"I was adopted several times but nobody wanted to keep me. I was too difficult believe it or not," I breathe out a pitiful chuckle. "I found out about my ability by age 13 when some girls were bullying me in the locker room at school. Scared the shit out of them." Bucky and I share a small chuckle

"By 16 I had a handful of odd jobs. 18 I got taken out of the system and was on my own. I lived with a coworker for a while until I could afford a single room apartment. God it was such a shit hole," I chuckle again at the memory

"But, it was my shit hole. With all my jobs and busy schedule, I never had time for relationships. After a while of just barely making payments, I started to pick pocket just turn around and pawn whatever I got to use towards food. Got really good at it too. Till I got caught by Tony. He gave me a chance at a better life and here we are now." I pat my knee, finally mustering up the courage to meet Buckys gaze

He looked at me with so much wonder and compassion that it threw me off guard. I thought he'd pity me but I don't see anything even remotely close to that in his features. Which I'm thankful for. Anyone else who hears my life story always looks at me with so much pity and sympathy it makes me sick

"Sorry, I didn't mean to dampen the mood." I run my fingers through my hair nervously. He shakes his head with a small smile

"Don't apologize. I think it's admirable what you've overcame on your own. No wonder you're such a hard ass." He teases, causing me to laugh and instantly eases the tense air

"You know I can easily toss you in that water right?" I laugh lightheartedly pointing at the stream a few feet from us

He tightens his grip on my hand, "I can say the same thing to you babydoll." There he goes again with the pet name. But I'll never admit to him that I actually love it

"That a challenge?" I joke, raising a brow at him

"That's a promise sweetheart." In one fell swoop, he drops my hand and picks me up, throwing me over his shoulder. I gasp at his quick movement, stunned by how fluid and fast he was with his motions

"James Buchanan put me d-!" Before I can finish my sentence, I'm pushed off his shoulder and in the air

I let out a squeal before hitting the water, the cool liquid enveloping me. It wasn't cold enough to shock my system but definitely enough to wake me up. I push my now matted hair out of my face as I emerge from the water to find a snickering Bucky

"Oh you're gonna get it now!" I call out to him with a laugh, slowly making my way to where he was

As I emerged from the water, my clothes practically suctioned to my skin. Bucky stops laughing and watches me as I approach him. A lustrous look growing in his eyes. Confused, I look down at myself

My white shirt clung to my soaked body, exposing my black bra underneath. My jean shorts now weighted down by the water, hung almost dangerously low on my hips

I look back up at him and roll my eyes with an evil smirk. In one quick motion, I lift my hand and flick my wrist. Bucky gets shot into the water behind me, spraying me with droplets as he falls

"Horn dog." I mumble to myself with a smirk as I exit the river, leaving a chuckling Bucky behind.

.

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