*
The tale of Lyra James and the Second Wizarding War was never supposed to be a happy one. It wasn't supposed to be one in sorrow either, or of excitement, or pain. It is one of hope, love and ultimately, loss.
The seer had lost too much. It took an hour alone for her to realise who's fault it was. All in one night her dignity, her hopes at a settled, quiet future and her family had disappeared into thin air, much quicker than it had appeared. Her heart ached, writhing and squirming in her chest in a clueless attempt to keep afloat in the sea that Lyra had drowned it in - her brindled tears built into something destructive. She didn't deserve to be in Gryffindor house, she didn't deserved that title anymore - she wasn't brave or smart or cunning or kind. Lyra felt as though she was dumb, stupid and plain and she didn't deserve a single thing in the world.
The seer had been sat all alone at the Hufflepuff Table of the Great Hall, in a quiet that was essentially her wollowing in her own self pity. The tattoo on her forearm burned, serving a reminder to what she sacrificed and what she had become to keep one person safe while Harry saved hundreds, thousands and if not billions from Tom Riddle. Dylan was sitting with Oliver at the Gryffindor Table, their foreheads touching like they both ignored the plate of food in front of them and the looks of disgust from a few members of the resistance and focused on one another, occasionally talking but just enjoying one another's presence. The Weasley's were only a few metres away from them, a close knit group, closer than the rest with Anna about to arrive to sit with them and mourn Fred Weasley. Sirius Black, Neville Longbottom, Pavarti Patel and the incredibly injured but insanely strong Lavender Brown were all speaking about one thing or another - distracting themselves. On the Ravenclaw, Cho Chang, Michael Corner, Blaise Zabini and Andrea sat with Kingsley Shacklebolt, all discussing something with a mixture of grave intent and hysterics. Harry was nowhere to be seen, neither were Ron or Hermione. Lyra felt a thousand miles away from all of them. She was alone, they were together. They were all alive, she had never felt so dead. But still she lived.
Lyra stood, just as Regulus had walked towards her and was about to sit. "Lyra, can I speak to you?"
"I'd rather be alone if you don't mind."
"Course I don't." She gave a swift nod before turning around and going the long way to her destination, which was the area in which the bodies had been set.
Remus Lupin was no longer mocking - he looked peaceful for once and his scars only heightened the torment that she felt but Death didn't suit him. He was too important to die but he did it anyway. She pressed a hand into her own and leaned down, whispering something into his ear that she wasn't sure would survive to tell the tale (but she had a feeling and her feelings were usually right). With a small kiss pressed to his cheek, she hesitated to stand again, attentive to not stumble and embarrass herself. She loved him. She loved him and he was dead, everyone she loved was dead.
She moved on, going towards Ethan Dolohov, eyes fixed on his red converses for a second and moving on to his curled brown hair and cold ivory skin. All he ever wanted was to go against his father, to see him dead or locked up in Askaban but he didn't even get to see it. She leaned down, whispering something else into his ear, shaking hands against numbness of her own chest.
Fred Weasley was next, crystal eyes hidden by his eyelids. Bright orange hair jeered at her pain, the ghost of the smile remaining while she kneeled down beside his body. "We changed the world, Freddie." she told him, biting back tears. No, no, there were 47 more to talk to, she had to leave a message, a letter before she would do what she was planning on doing and what she had always been planning on doing. "Moldy Voldy's dead...." she hesitated before continuing, speaking to herself, "but you're dead too." Tears brimmed and she finally let them pass through, shuddering to even speak, "You've...you've brought me so much happiness, Freddie and I love you so much. T-T—J-ust know that I will always miss you, Fred.." Lyra pressed a kiss against over her best friend's cheek and smiled briefly when she pulled away and echo of his stupid voice still playing on repeat in her head. "Look after Anna, okay? If you hurt my cousin I'll kill you again."
Lyra stood. One by one, she left a message for every single one of the people whether she knew them properly or not. She glanced down at a fallen centaur fawn, not protected by Harry's charm and the last of the fallen. She placed a hand delicately on their cheek and whispered something for him to wake up to.
"James?"
Lyra turned and stood, Firenze towering over her protectively, "I didn't do anything, I just left a message." she responded at him, hands raised on defence. The centaurs bowed his head for a moment in peace, Lyra's eyebrows furrowing together.
The centaur trotted uncomfortably as he led Lyra to somewhere they could sit and speak alone, a conversation necessary considering the prophecy that still stood. They reached the courtyard, Lyra sitting herself on a broken pillar as she looked down at the castle grounds so they were finally level. "I do not believe you mean any harm." he told her. "The opposite, I believe you wish to help—"
"I know what I have to do." she whispered back, "it might just be the thing to kill me but I need to do it nevertheless." Firenze smiled, for the first time she'd ever seen from him but Lyra couldn't quite reciprocate. She knew what was left for her and she also knew she couldn't stay after she walked into the Forbidden Forest and practically became a Death Eater. "It's not over for me, is it?"
"I'm afraid not."
"It'll catch up, all of it but I think a break is needed. What do you think?"
"I think you should do as your heart desires."
A chuckle left her lips. Freedom to do as she pleased, as an adult in both the Wizarding World and in the muggle one - it was so bittersweet she could barely taste the seeet. Her eyes raised, looking over at the broken architecture, dust and stone littering every part of the castle. "I think you give much better personal advice than Dumbledore." Her eyes moved over to the white marble tomb by the Black Lake, "He would've just told me to do what was best for everyone else, to stay despite everything that happened."
"It wasn't your fault, Lyra," his silky voice reassured, "you did what you needed to do to guarantee your brother's life—"
"One wrong move and I could've killed him and myself, could've revealed everything I know and damned us all forever. It's a miracle we even got here—"
"Lyra." Firenze stated firmly, grasping her attention with both hands, "not everything is your fault. The world has asked too much of you—we have all asked too much of you and of Potter. It is time for you to liberate yourself," Lyra listened but couldn't believe it. Her eyes moved to the black lake for a second, her heart aching. "Do you understand?"
Lyra turned to face the centaur and nodded slowly, "Yes, but can you do me a favour?" She spoke as she stood, in a brief moment of confidence, "Tell Andrea, like really pretty girl, shoulder length brown hair," Lyra demonstrated with her own before Firenze nodded, "Tell her to come to the Black Lake in about an hour and to bring drinking water, I need some time before I bring all these people back to life."
"Are you sure? James! Lyra?" he attempted but Lyra had already ran off deep into the castle, past the Great Hall and into the nearest classroom which just so happened to be a Transfiguration classroom. Sprinting to the teachers desk, Lyra pulled several pieces of paper and a Quill from its cabinet and sat down as she wrote several notes to whoever still cared anymore. It took almost twenty minutes, some contained a simple word, some contained instructions and prophecies and some contained genuine heartfelt messages towards her friends. She sprinted back inside the Great Hall, towards the separate area in the back where the bodies were lay and placed one in the pockets of Ethan Dolohov, Fred Weasley, Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks and just before she left, the seer went back to the body of Fred Weasley. "Told you I'd bring you back, stupidhead." she spoke to him before pressing a kiss to his cheek and walking.
Another twenty minutes later and she had successfully hidden the notes in places around the castle she knew only the recipient would find. Moving on felt freeing but how long it would last made her fearful. Everything was temporary.
The Black Lake greeted her well, as an old friend, like it had done time and time again when she was in crisis.
She remembered the first, after the Department of Mysteries and she thought Sirius Black was gone forever, Remus came to comfort her. The second, after she had watched Dumbledore die, Remus had come to comfort her and in the looong days that followed it was Fred that checked up on her, making sure she was eating and looking after herself. She had no one now. She'd corrupted it all.
The warm bright sun had fully risen up on the side of the lake, the rolling green hills reflecting from the surface and painting a picture through the ripples. She was cast in orange light, the sand underneath her as she sat was warming. There wasn't a single person, centaur or creature about, all of them had either fled, gone home, to the castle or returned to the Forbidden Forest which ruffled brightly against the May sun. A year before she would've longed to be within the peace and quiet but now it was bittersweet. Hogwarts was not her home any longer.
Lyra James had come to the realisation in the hour or so while she had been sitting in that one spot that she relied too much on other people. She wouldn't be feeling as much if she just ignored everyone, remained quiet and didn't love. Her brother's capture wouldn't have forced her to walk into that forest if she had just kept her distence. If she knew no one, loved no one then she would be safe again.
Lyra's heart had been shattered into thousands of pieces, breaking apart little by little throughout the course of day. It left a hole, empty and cold. She felt nothing. She wanted nothing. She had no hope, no ambition, no happiness, no joy, no laughter. She was merely a shell of what a human being was supposed to be, covered in scars and tattoos which wasn't her.
Loving people was the problem and Lyra needed to be rid of it.
The tide hadn't washed over yet but eventually, she'd feel the same wave of sadness as she had in July of 1996, only more. She hadn't lost just herself this time, she lost members of her family and that was something that couldn't be replaced... only restored.
Her half of the Resurrection stone was within the palm of her hand, debating whether she should speak to them again - just one last time until she leaves forever. It turned thrice in her hand. The milky-white shadows of Adam and Marie James appeared in front of her.
"You really have to throw that out so you don't get tempted, you heard what happened to the second brother in the tale." Marie spoke, sitting cross legged in front of her daughter while Adam sat beside her, looking out onto the rolling hills and greenery, not exactly paying attention to it all but not either.
"I just wanted to be with you before I do anything—" Lyra responded.
"Lyra, we're always with you, you don't need some stupid rock to feel that." Adam told her, the seer smiling affectionately back. Marie and Adam seemed to be having a silent conversation, the seer pretending not to see but seeing it all and glancing to her dad as he began, "Dylan looks... happy with Oliver."
"Oh, yeah, forgot to say, your son is incredibly, very unapologetically gay."
Marie laughed for a few seconds by Lyra's forthrightness. "As song as he's happy. Adam?"
"Hmm, yeah, he is what he is, it's not like we can change anything and we wouldn't want to." he dismissed, eyes focused on the squid which paid them a visit from the depths of the lake, Lyra smiled at it delicately while a flash of concern appeared on her mother's face, sharing it with her husband. "Are you sure about what you're going to do? Both of your choices?"
"Too late to back out anyway, people must've already began seeing the notes."
"It could kill you..." Marie warned carefully, "bringing back fifty people is a lot. Last time it was only one and another was an accident and it took you a week to heal, this one is big. I don't think you know how big it is."
"I can make everything better—"
Marie's hand reached for Lyra's, passing through immediately which made the two woman stop for a second. "That's not your responsibility to do. You've done enough—"
"I would've done anything to save Dylan." Lyra mumbled which silenced both, adults into looking at her as she pulled her knees closer to her chest and rested her chin on it while her arms hugged it tightly, "Voldemort knew that, he knew I would do anything for people I consider family— Ma, he made me watch Harry die because he knew that about me. He knew it would break me. I love him so much and he made me watch him die and it fucking hurts so much— I-I keep on seeing his body drop and Ethan's shoes and Fred's bloody blue eyes and I want it to stop and I know how and I'm going to do it. I...It's the only way it can go away, I know, I just never—I don't want to live like this—"
"I know, I know, I know and it's so normal to feel like this but you can't just risk your life—"
"If I do this, people won't think of me of that girl that who turned herself in, I'd be the girl who brought fifty people back from the dead—"
"And that would put you in so much danger, you'll be exposing yourself and everyone to what you can do and what it can bring. Lyra there is always a cost, a punishment for this—"
"And I'd happily take it if Teddy gets to see his mum and dad... alive and parenting and being the parents you could've been. Mum, Dad, I know I'll be almost killing myself by doing this but this is my family, the one I have chosen. I can't just let the die and pass knowing I could postpone it just a little, just so Teddy can see his parent - so Ethan and Colin can have a life... so Fred could have one too— So will you help me and be with me while I do it... even if you find me completely stupid for doing it?"
Adam and Marie shared a fearful look and for a moment she was sure that they'd leave her all lone in this. "Always, you don't even have to ask." Adam's voice ran like silk over her, hand reaching to grasp hers and hovering over as she smiled, appretiaing the sentiment despite his incapability. "Right, are we doing this or not?"
"I'll do it in a few minutes," Lyra whispered to herself, the horizon not seeming to imprint itself into her brain. Lyra's entire body rested gently over the river bank, stones and dirt clinging to her skin and hair but the girl being indifferent to it all. All she needed was a moment to breath.
*
With a small gasp, the echo of a whisper woke Remus Lupin from the strangest dream he had been having. He dreamed he'd died, that everything happy in the world had been taken from him and for a second he was sure it had actually happened. Staggered shaking rasps took its place in his lungs, the werewolf having nothing else to do aside from coughing it all out, sitting up to do so.
Nymphadora Tonks was dead beside him, completely still as one of those statues you'd find in museums, depicting great loves and pure beauty but with a sudden breath in, she shot up into a seating position and began violently coughing as he'd done and was still doing.
"Lyra." he rasped, whisper still bouncing through his skull awkwardly, the man trying to piece it together bit by bit.
Remus Lupin was incredibly confused, as Sirius Black had been when he entered the small chamber they were being kept on. The man stilled, glaring as tears glazed his eyes, not yet connecting the dots as to why he was awake. "R-R—"
Remus stood and melted into Sirius' arms, his legs still frozen cold from death, warmth wrapping over them instead. "L-L-L—"
"Shh, it's—"
"N-N-o, Lyra, s-she—"
Sirius Black understood, eyes widening in realisation but not knowing it was too late to stop her from doing what they knew was going to happen, what they wished they had done to cope with the first war all those years ago - run and hide away.
An hour had already passed since Lyra James woke up to a pack of centaurs and Andrea hovering over her, all worried out of their minds. The centaurs offered quick remedies while Andrea offered company, knowing she was no use otherwise.
Half an hour had passed since Lyra James finally stood on shaking legs, hugging Andrea briefly in goodbye and thanking the centaurs for their hospitality. She walked from the forest one last time, Andrea's arm linked around her waist to support her and ensure she didn't fall.
Twenty five had passed since Regulus had found Lyra at the edge of the forbidden forest, simply sitting at her side as she watched the sky. Walking had gotten too tiring for her to continue without a break. "They've woke up... the fallen fifty." He glanced to where she was smiling slightly, before it fell considerably, placing her head on his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Lyra."
"Why?" she whispered back.
"I just am. Is that okay?"
"More than."
They sat in silence for a few moments before Lyra stood up again, Regulus using his arm to support her forwards. "Look, I'm not stupid," he announced suddenly, "I know you're not staying, but I just want you to know that you always have a friend in me. You can contact me at any time and I will come. It doesn't matter how far away to you are."
She stopped in her tracks, before embracing him as tight as she could. She tucked her mouth to her chin, closing her eyes as a wave of pain burst it's way through her body. She held her breath for a moment, before letting it all go. The last thing she saw of Regulus Black was his sympathetic smile.
Fifteen minutes had passed since Lyra had limped up to the castle, packed up the stuff she had left in Hermione's bag and visited Gryffindor Tower one last time to say goodbye to Nox and make sure she was well looked after as when Lyra was gone. The cat knew what she was about to do, purring non stop and practically refusing to leave Lyra - the seer was in tears again but she knew Ethan would look after Nox so much better than Lyra could ever. Dylan found her just as she was walking back, taking him sister into a bear-hug when he'd figured it out by her face, making sure he put every single unspoken emotion into it. Goodbyes weren't dared to be said, it wasn't goodbye forever and they both knew it - they knew that somehow, somewhere, they'd be a way for them to be brother and sister again in a healthier way. Lyra pulled away, sniffling as their eyes met, both nodding apprehensively and placing a small box containing her half of the resurrection stone into his hand and making him promise to keep it safe.
"B-B—But—" Dylan had stuttered to her, "I-I can't have this, this isn't—Dumbledore give whatever this is to you."
"Does it matter anymore what Dumbledore gave to me? He's dead and since he gave it to me, I have the right to give it to another. I-I can't be trusted with this, I need you to have it and promise me you'll keep it safe until I get back—"
"Where are you even going to go? Have you thought this through?"
"No but... whenever I plan things it usually just goes to shit anyway. I'll use the mirror when I'm okay and safe so you don't have to worry, just take the box."
Lyra thrusted it into his hands once again, Dylan's eyes looking down to it before nodding, promising to protect it with his life despite the fact that it was incredibly over dramatic which did manage to make her laugh. The brother pressed a soft kiss to his sisters temple as she brought him into another gentle hug. Lyra walked away first, hearing a sob from her brother as she left and stopping in her tracks to turn back towards him.
"Hey, Dylan." She had called as he turned to look at her, "You're my favourite person, you know—"
"Oh, fuck off, you melodramatic twat." he yelled from the other side of the hallway, wiping his tears as Lyra laughed, "Go on, live your life, don't let anyone stop you." Lyra gave him one last smile before going about her way.
Only ten minutes had passed since Lyra James was face to face with Harry Potter, explaining everything to him. He understood. He knew. He felt the same but he wished things could be different between them. Lyra released him of any obligation he may have had to her while he kept hold of it secretly, she'd always have his heart and it didn't matter whether they were together or not. Harry kissed her one last time, nose pressed against her cheek while her hands were planted on either side of his cheeks, savouring the temporary safety she felt in his presence. Tears filled her eyes as she pulled away before she walked away from them and from herself.
"Hey, love?" Harry called just as she had picked up her backpack. Lyra turned, "I love you."
Bumblebees swarmed in her stomach as she smiled sadly back, "I love you more, Potter. I'll see you around."
It had only been five minutes when Lyra James, backpack on back, strode down the beige gravel passage towards the front gates of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and turned her back on the Wizarding World, damning it forever for what it did to her.
It was a new beginning and she was going to do exactly that. Lyra Marie James was going to begin again.
*
END OF PART THREE
*
title based on this scene in le mis