𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐃 || 𝐊𝐃𝐆

𝟏||

"So, Kentrell, why don't you introduce yourself to everybody?"

The dude side-eyed Ms. Mayweather and smacked his lips, mumbling something under his breath before finally looking down and saying "I 'on like talkin'."

I rolled my eyes. Here we go. Another fucking lost cause.

Ms. Mayweather wasn't going for the bullshit though. "I'm sure no one here likes to talk about their problems but you all are here for a reason..." She paused hoping that might encourage him, but all he did was stare back with low eyes. "Very well, have a seat Kentrell."

Smirking, the guy licked his lips and walked to the nearby chair that was diagonally behind me. I watched him as he sat down and was about to look away until his low cat eyes landed on me. There was something inexplicable about the way we stared at each other; it sent chills down my spine. Maybe he was all right.

I was about to offer a small smile before he started smirking again, making a kiss face towards me. I frowned before turning away, shaking my head in disgust. Hell no, bitch, stay clear from this crazy ass nigga.

I felt eyes on me but decided not to look back to meet them again. I tried my hardest to pay attention to what Ms. Mayweather was saying – rambling on about the importance of today's exercise – and continued to pop the rubber band against my wrist. My anxiety was starting to be triggered for some reason.

"...I think I'm going to dismiss you all early, today, but before you go, I want you all to list three goals that you hope to accomplish – they can be about anything, short-term or long-term – and put them on my desk before you leave. We'll pick things back up next Wednesday." She clapped her hands and allowed everyone to write down their goals. I stared at my pen and paper for a very long time, not really knowing what to write down. Suddenly, two ideas popped up in my head and I started writing...

1. Get the FUCK outta BR! ASAP!

2. Dance and/or sing and song-write

And...

I scrunched my face up. I didn't know what my third goal was. Fuck, bitch, can you just write some shit so you can go? Rico is waiting outside! You can probably catch her before she pulls off!

I dared to turn around to look at the new group member and saw him crumple up his piece of paper and place it on the desk. I watched him bowleg his way towards the door before he turned to look back at me one more time, his eyes holding my face before they cut forward and he disappeared.

"Honestly, I don't know about that one..." Ms. Mayweather mumbled to herself before she gathered everyone's papers. She didn't even look at his paper before tossing it in the trash next to the desk. She turned to me with a sad smile and I smiled back before looking down and scribbling some bullshit on my paper.

3. Survive this class.

I got up and handed her my paper before she left the classroom, leaving me alone by myself. I headed towards the door but stopped and turned back to the trashcan.

Did he even write anything down? Wait, a minute, bitch, why do you even care?

I let out a sigh and dug my hand in the trash, picking up the wad of paper that Ms. Mayweather threw away. Opening it up, I was surprised. He had written something down.

1. Rap about my pain

2. Be happy and rich as FUCK!

3. Find sumbody to luv me for me...

Well, damn, maybe he really is all right. I shushed my thoughts and folded the piece of paper before slipping it in to my notebook. I'd return it to him if I ever see him again. He didn't seem very interested in group therapy (or plain therapy for that matter) but it was just his first day. I was already three sessions ahead and I was still adjusting. I hate talking about shit.

I walked out of the building and saw my best friend's Pontiac G6 parked in front. I got in and heard her blasting "Smack a Bitch" by Rico Nasty. Morgan loved her sugar-trap. She had an ear for music and listened to everything. She would be a great Head of A&R at somebody's label if she actually took herself seriously.

"Damn, girl, that was fast. You weren't in there long today, huh?" She asked as I buckled up and she drove off.

"Nah, Mayweather, seemed like she was in a pissy mood. I think the new nigga pissed her off." I told her, rolling the window down as we passed by Baton Rouge Community College. "We going to Bellue's right?"

"Shit'chea." She told me turning on her AC. "Girl, why Ben talking about this party today? He says its gone go dumb! We should go." She told me, smoking her hookah pen.

"Party? Bitch, what's there to celebrate?" I asked her, running my fingers through my hair. It was hot as fuck outside, but that's not surprising. Humidity in Baton Rouge is always on some sauna shit. "Ain't too much going on." I mumbled.

"Um, yeah, girl, his best friend just got home. He been down in the jail but they finally freed him." Morgan was bobbing her head to the new song that was playing on the radio. I rolled my eyes. Every time there's a party going on it's because someone came home from jail and for the most part, those parties DON'T end well.

"I'll think about it." I mumbled but Morgan smacked her lips. "Man, Rico, leave me alone na." I told her, getting her to giggle.

"Girl you going. Calae and Kee gone be there, too, so you'll have plenty of people to talk to. Ben, Three, and Joe gone be there too. Kentrell is like their brother." She said and my eyes got wide.

"Kentrell? That's his name?" I asked. Damn, ole boy was Ben and them friend? He's the one I've been hearing about? That nigga is REAL LIFE CRAY! I looked at Morgan and she nodded her head. She gave me a confused glance like she was mentally asking me what was wrong. "Nothing, I just remember Ben talking about him. Nigga acting like that's his boyfriend or something." I said, and then both of us started laughing. We began clowning Ben and his friendship with "Kentrell" but in the back of my mind, I kept thinking back to the Kentrell that was in group therapy today.

He had marks on his forehead, probably from some childhood trauma or some shit and he had this big ass grill in his mouth that he flashed when he smirked at me. My heart started racing just picturing his eyes on me. I almost didn't catch Morgan asking me what I wanted from Bellue's.

"The usual." I told her. I dug in my bag to pull out my cash, my ballet shoes falling out. "Shit." I muttered when I couldn't find my wallet.

"Nad, don't worry about it. I got you."

"You sure?" I hated when I leave things at home. Always be prepared. I guess you not on your shit today, huh?

"Yeah suh, I'm sure. This is me paying you back for last time." She grinned before flipping her hair over shoulders and turning into the parking lot. "And this means you definitely coming to the party." She smirked at me and I sighed before smiling and nodding my head.

"Whatever, when we get back to my house, you can tell me what I need to wear." I said before we hopped out the car.

Morgan and I finished eating and were back on my street in no time. She only lived a couple of streets up from meand decided to drop me off before getting ready at her place. I grabbed my bag and jogged up the steps to open the door. I walked in and it smelled like pies and peach cobbler. No doubt, my mama was in the kitchen with a couple of her friends laughing and talking like a couple of hens.

"Mama, I'm home." I called into the kitchen, putting my bag down and taking off my jacket. I took my hair tie that was around my wrist and put my hair up in a bun. Being in the humidity, it was frizzy.

"Mon chéri, come here, che." She called me and I walked into the kitchen to see my mom and two godmothers sitting with her. She had just taken her pie-crusted cobbler out of the oven and there was a big tub of Bluebell's Homemade Vanilla ice cream on the counter. "You wanna slice?" She asked me.

"No thank you. I was actually going to head upstairs to get dressed. Rico and I are going to a party." I told her, smiling. I was 18 and my mom told me she would let me go off and do my own thing, but I still wanted to check with her. Such a good little girl.

"Where you goin'?" She asked me not bothering to look up from cutting her pie. "You going over by 38th street?" She asked me. I gulped. Here we go.

I looked at her before smiling. "No ma'am." I lied. I knew that the party was going to be in Ben's and Kentrell's neighborhood and I knew that meant that it was going to be on 38th street (it was apparently a "neighborhood party for Kentrell") "It's at Southern." I continued with the lie.

"Oh, well, in that case...have some fun. Come home around 1:30. Be responsible even though you don't need a reminder." She told me, finally looking up at me. I could feel my godmothers' eyes staring at me. They knew I was lying but decided not to say anything for some reason.

"Yes ma'am. Love you...love y'all." I said quickly before hurrying upstairs. I shut the door quickly before flopping on my bed. I pulled my notebook from under my pillow and began flipping through the filled pages before I landed on a bookmarked page. July 27, 2017.

I briefly paused my search for a blank page and decided to unfold the obituary pamphlet. I became unaware of everything around me as I stared at my father's face on the book. Renaud Landry. Sunrise: July 4, 1974. Sunset: July 27, 2017.

I felt my eyes begin to sting as I remembered his bright and shining smile. His laugh echoed in my ears while flipping through the pamphlet, looking all of the pictures and kind words that were left by loved ones and friends.

One particular line stood out: I will always love my husband for being the man that he was to you all and being the amazing father that he was to Ranada and Reyna.

Mama's words were so beautiful that day but that was the last time I felt love and warmth from her as my mother. Sure, Reyna was good. She was going to start middle school soon and Mama made sure she kept her busy and showed her love. She was still very young and Daddy's death was difficult for her to understand.

It was difficult for you, too. But what does she know? I shook away my thoughts as I folded the pamphlet and put it back in its place before I flipped my journal to a blank page.

May 30, 2018

Mayweather was somewhat flighty today. A super bitch for no reason. She didn't even bother to read "Kentrell's" goals.

Speaking of "Kentrell," I wonder if he is the same person that this welcome home party is for. Probably is because how many "Kentrells" do I know? Well...I don't even know this one or the one Ben talks about...all the DAMN time. I guess I'll find out tonight. If they are the same person, I think I'll give him his note back.

Closing my journal, I FaceTimed Morgan to see if she was getting ready. When she answered, she had a towel wrapped around her body. "Hey, bitch, I'm just about ready."

I laughed. "I didn't even get started yet." I told her, holding the phone and walking to my closet to find something to wear. I pulled out my distressed denim jacket and a black graphic t-shirt with Devin the Dude's "Just Tryin' Ta Live" album cover on the front. I also grabbed some black biker shorts and then put everything on my bed. "Should I wear my Docs or white high tops?" I asked, holding a shoe of each pair.

She looked in the camera and scrunched up her face. "The Vans." She said, choosing the high tops. I nodded and decided to put on some music to get ready and we started running it over the phone. Before you know it, I was dressed and she was on the way to pick me up. I decided to do a quick wash-n-go, letting my natural curls fall around my shoulders.

I heard Morgan knock at the door and ran past Reyna to answer the door. "Bye! See you both later. Love you." I called out opening the door and grabbing Morgan's hand to rush to the car.

"Damn, girl, what's the rush?! I thought you didn't want to go to this party." She asked me raising her eyebrows.

I rolled my eyes at her, buckling my seat belt. "I still don't. I just want to get the fuck outta that house." I told her, lighting the blunt that I had grabbed from my purse.

"You still faking like everything is okay with her?" She asked, turning the song on her phone.

"You mean, "Is she still faking like everything is okay?" Yes, she is." I told her and Morgan disagreed.

"Ranada, you need to cut Mommy Vanessa some slack." She said and I frowned. Here we go with the Mommy Vanessa shit. "Na, look, you know you my bitch and I cut for you every time, BUT you have to think about how hard everything's been for her...and Reyna too! She's just tryna play Super Woman."

"I don't need Super Woman or whatever front she's putting on for everybody. Neither does Reyna, shit." I said, taking a couple of puffs before I continued, "We need our mom."

I saw Morgan nod out the corner of my eye. Passing the blunt to her, she turned down the street and started flicking her lights. Another car that was parked on the street flicked their lights back. I shook my head. We're here.

Once we turned on Chippewa, I sucked my teeth as I saw all the cars parked along the street. "Damn, they pulled out the welcome wagon for this nigga." I heard Morgan say. How many people did this dude know? It felt like the entire Northside was here. "Let me go park in Ms. Boudreaux's driveway."

I scrunched up my face. "Don't she get people shit towed?" Morgan laughed and nodded.

"Shit'chea but she knows me and loves me. Plus, I get Ben to cut her grass anytime she needs, so I'm really her plug." She told me and I laughed.

"Oh shit na, not the lawn mower plug!" I responded and we both started laughing. "Shit, I feel like I haven't seen Ben's ass in a minute. None of these niggas really. I guess because they all got their own stuff they're dealing with."

"Mmhm, we all do hell. Especially you, Miss Mamas." She grinned towards me and I gave her a look. "Girl, stop, you know you're excited about starting school in New York City...away from this muthafucking place."

"Whew, chile, that's not until January or so." I said, not really wanting to get into it.  It was only May and everything seemed like such a long way.  I had so much to do and get prepared for.

"Still, you're about to go into something you've been preparing your whole life for.  Don't take that shit for granted."

"Mmm...my admission is preliminary.  I still have to do my recital."

"Okay and you gone fuck it up, regardless.  Stop doubting yourself." Rico spoke, looking at me.

I sighed, snapping the rubber band against my wrist. I could feel myself getting worked up, mentally.  Rico must have noticed because she grabbed my hand, stopping me from snapping the rubber band against my wrist again. I looked at her and she offered a smile. "You're right. I'm ready to get the fuck outta Baton Rouge."

"That's what I like to hear. You gotta let yourself enjoy things. Don't be so anxious. You about to fuck up the world and become a famous bitch."

I smiled, feeling my cheeks warm up. We had parked and I could hear the music a couple of houses down. It was dark outside and people were walking up and down the street, high fiving, doing handshakes, and hugging. Loudness and laughter were heard. Sometimes, in moments like this, Baton Rouge was good. Family was here. Love was here. The Northside felt like a community; a family. I guess I would miss that.

We both got out of the car and watched the scene before us. People were grouped up laughing and joking, and some people were walking up towards the music. Morgan and I started walking, passing up different scenarios. There was one in particular that wasn't too pleasing.

"Slime shit! All day er'day! My nigga Lil Top free! The streets ain't safe no moe!" Somebody spoke into another person's camera, most likely posting on Instagram or Snapchat. He was toting a large gun with a green bandana wrapped around his neck. Well, definitely won't miss that shit.

"Say, Rico! Suuweeeeet!" Somebody called up ahead and Morgan got the biggest smile on her face. Ben came running down the street to pick her up and place a kiss on her lips. I rubbed the side of my face. This shit is so ghetto and cute. He finally put her down and looked towards me. "What's up ole big head ass lil guh?" He asked me giving me a hug.

"Boy shut yo big nose ass up!" I said back and we both laughed. "Yall got everybody from BR here, huh?" I asked pulling away and we all looked around at the shenanigans going on.

"Fuck no! Just the Nawf! Southside niggas can stay where they at or get done up!" He said, brandishing his gun. I smiled but shook my head. Hood culture had earned a permanent stay in Baton Rouge since before I was born, but sometimes it was sad to think of how it messed up many families and took many lives. I just want my friends to be okay. "Kee and Calae here. Yall need to head up to the crib so they can have someone to talk to other than Three and Baby Joe asses."

I rolled my eyes. Lord, Kee and Baby Joe were something else. They were fucking but they argued like a damn married couple it's funny until it's not. Their arguments can get real ratchet. Both of them give zero fucks when it comes to getting angry. They were both psycho, a match made in Hell.

Calae was a bit of a savage and Three was lowkey simping over her, but that's only because Calae was protecting herself. Working at the strip club, she came across a lot of ain't shit dudes. Also, personal shit went on that led her to not trusting dudes. To be honest, we ALL had fucking trust issues.

"You guys can go off and do your own thing. I'll go find them and break up the bullshit." I offered, seeing how in the moment Ben was with Morgan. They nodded at me and then started walking off towards another group of people to talk. I watched them, smiling, but my mind started racing.

They were a decent match. They had their moments too, but for the most part, Ben was solid with Morgan and vice versa. She keeps him grounded and he motivates her to pursue a career in the music industry. Sometimes, though, I can't help but feel that Morgan doesn't want to leave Ben behind. She's gotten some offers from some record labels to start working and talent scouting, but she hasn't accepted one offer. They were all in Atlanta or California, which is far away from Ben and due to him having a case pending; he wasn't able to leave Baton Rouge.

Don't get me wrong. I have some smart friends, I just feel like life's circumstances may have made them prioritize differently. For instance, Morgan's dad has been in prison for most of her life and will probably be in prison until he dies. She didn't really have that male role model when she started getting interested in boys. Ben had always been around and was a friend to us, but when they started to notice each other, she had no direction on how to go about things. She only had his signals and her emotions. That's all she ever knew. Ben was all she ever knew.

I just hope she puts herself first one day and realizes that Ben is rooting for her. He's cool with her leveling up (we've had our talks). He knows she's got potential but so does he. They were meant to be in the industry together, but the street life caught up with Ben and now he's facing time and stuck in this hell hole.

"Okay, snap out of it, Nad." I mumbled to myself before turning to walk towards Ben's house. I passed up a few more scenes of people doing different things – from kissing and dancing to arguing to banging and talking about "Lil Top" – before I finally made it to Ben's house. His folks were out of town for the weekend, so I know the house was free game for Ben's shenanigans. I walked through the door and heard the music booming, but I also heard Kee's and Baby Joe's voices arguing in the kitchen.

"Nigga, you can't stack 5 cards on top like that!" She shouted. I walked in to see Kee, Calae, Baby Joe, and Three and some other dudes gathered around the table. From the looks of things, they were playing Uno.

"Uh, why da fuck not?! We playing "triples and doubles" right?!" He asked, showing his confused stance. I laughed. This was one of their small arguments.

"Duh, nigga! "Triples and doubles" not "quadruples and quintuplets"!" She yelled getting everybody to laugh. "Yo ass stay cheating, Joseph!" She said, throwing a couple of his cards back at him.

"Nah, that's yo ass, Jatayvia!" He said, throwing the same cards back. "I ain't gone start with you! You making up dumb stupid rules!" He told her.

"Nigga, did yo high school drop out ass just call me stupid?!" She yelled. Calae and Three started laughing because they knew the drama was about to start. I decided to make my presence known and ease the tension, so I walked forward getting everybody to notice me.

"Hey bitch!" Kee yelled, motioning for me to come over. "Where Rico?" She asked as I sat down by her after Baby Joe side hugged me.

"Out there socializing with Ben." I told her, neatly stacking the cards that were already thrown down. "Y'all in here arguing, per usual. But what's new?" I asked.

Baby Joe sucked his teeth. "Nah, we arguing because ya guh hea' creating new rules out ha' ass like she don't know how to play Uno." Calae and Three started laughing and I smiled.

Kee wasn't going though. She loved to argue. "Nah, that's you, Joseph! You think you slick! I knew you was on some bullshit when you tried to stack that 'Draw 4' card on top with that 'Wild' card!"

"You do the same thing, shit! Pick a color!"

"Nah, nigga, they don't hold the same weight! Just pickin' a color ain't the same as making somebody draw four cards and you picking a color! Like, the fuck?!"

Everyone was laughing as they continued to bicker. I finally calmed myself down before I interrupted. "Y'all it's not that serious. Yall gone turn it in to something else or leave the table and somebody gone find yall in one of these rooms messing around. Just move on." I told them and Calae agreed. Kee looked at me and nodded.

"You got a point there, Nad."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, when is Top getting here?! I'm ready for the party ta start!" Baby Joe said.

"Hell yeah." Three agreed, quietly. He and Calae looked super high. I needed to be what they were on, but I decided to focus on the subject.

"Who the fuck is "Top"?" I asked.

Baby Joe looked at me with wide eyes, then changed his expression. "That's right, you don't know my nigga. Trell is Top. Shit, honestly, that nigga got multiple names."

"Shit'chea." Three agreed, laughing.

Calae looked at me. "You never met Kentrell?"

I shook my head. Kee interjected. "That's because Mama Vanessa had that ass in them AP classes and extracurriculars." She said, heavily enunciating her 'r's, getting everyone, including me, to laugh. "Every day, my bitch would go to that special dance school that's in Prairieville or whateva. Shit that hard work paid off!"

"Sho' the fuck did! She's going to fucking Julliard!" Baby Joe said, enunciating his 'r's too and pronouncing "Julliard" as if he was one of those white girls down at LSU. That made everyone but Kee laugh.

"You always copy my shit." She said, rolling her eyes, making him suck his teeth.

"You love when I copy yo shit." He told her, kissing her cheek. She scrunched her face up but we all know she liked it.

It was starting to get loud outside, but we continued to run it up with each other before we heard the door open and close. "Say bitch! My nigga is in the fucking building! Hide ya hoes!" Ben's voice boomed as he and Morgan walked in with their arms wrapped around each other. I noticed that another person was behind them and they moved so that I could see the person.

Sure enough, like I had suspected, I found myself staring in those same low cat eyes that caught my attention early today in my group therapy session. They were glued to my face and red as fuck indicating that he was high. His eyes shined a bright brown around the redness and his grilled teeth were flashing at me and everyone at the table.

"Say Top! Fuck is going on, mane?!" Baby Joe hopped up, doing the handshake I've seen him do with Ben and Three to "Top." I guess I could associate him with the Kentrell to Ben's stories now, too.

"Nun, I been home for bout a week na. Just been coolin. Say, 3, whaddup?!" Kentrell called to Three and Three got up from underneath Calae to get up and perform the ritual handshake. "Mane, my niggas, my family. Damn, it's good to be home. I'm shocked I ain't find yall two in hea' arguin' an shit." Kentrell motioned between Baby Joe and Kee.

Kee waved him off. "Don't start him up, Kentrell. We at a good moment right na." She told him.

"Yes ma'am." He joked, like she was his mama or something. He turned back to me and stared at me before opening his mouth. "Say, who is you, shawty?" He asked me.

Ben piped in. "That's Nad. You neva met her before because yo ass was always in trouble and she was always off dancin' somewhere." Ben told him.

Kentrell turned to him before looking at me with a grin. His stare was sending shivers down my spine. "She strip, too?" He asked, talking about me as if I'm not here. Baby Joe started laughing but I didn't see shit funny.

"'Scuse me?" I asked him, folding my arms. Kentrell looked at me before smirking again.

"I asked if you a stripper like Calae." He repeated himself and Calae give Kentrell a weird look.

"Nigga, I'm not a stripper and neither is Nad." Calae said. Kentrell flicked his eyes towards her.

"My bad, Red, you know I'm jus' fuckin' off." He said before turning back to me. "Say, guh, how that chocolate taste? Y'all know I love me some chocolate." He nodded his head up at me.

"Aww, how impressive?" I said sarcastically. Did this nigga just imply that he wants to eat me?! "This is what the world was missing?" I asked, turning my head and hearing him chuckle.

"Oh, you a saddity bitch with a smart mouth, huh? I ain't tell from earlier. You was quiet as the fuck." He said from behind, getting me to snap my head in his direction. This nigga don't even know my full name and he's already comfortable with calling you a bitch?! Girl, fuck are you doing?!

"Nigga_"

"Y'all met earlier?" Ben interrupted me. My glare on Kentrell changed to a surprised expression towards Ben. Morgan looked between Kentrell, putting it all together in her head, and me. She knew that no one else knew about my group therapy so she quickly spoke up.

"Uh..yeah! Bae, they saw each other at the music store today." She lied, nudging Kentrell. He stared at her with a confused face then looked at my pleading eyes. This nigga may be rude as fuck; let's not add 'stupid' to the list.

He must have caught on because he started laughing. "Yeah." He went along with it. "I saw that ass first." He said, licking his lips, earning an eye roll from me. "Say, Ten, where the food at?!" He said loudly, changing the subject. Ben went off to find out who was barbecuing with Kentrell, Baby Joe, and Three following him. That left all of us girls alone.

"Damn, Kentrell, sniffing you out girl!" Kee said, grinning at me. "You know word has it that he's good at eating and other shit if you know what I mean. You should let him eat, bitch." She told me, making me frown.

"Fuck no, not my type. That nigga just called me a whole 'bitch'." I told her.

Calae chimed in. "Kentrell's like that. He's rough; sometimes you gotta roll with it. He didn't mean too much harm by it."

Um...I still don't think it's cool to call someone you don't know a 'bitch' but whatever. I didn't feel like arguing with anyone about it so I just dropped it. We continued to talk about other stuff for a long time before we all heard commotion outside, followed by a couple of gunshots. See what I mean? These parties don't ever end on a good note.

Ben ran back into the house. "Say, yall need to come on! They about to call the cops! We need to get the fuck outta hea'!" He shouted to us and on cue, we all rushed up. Ben started putting his weed stashes under the baseboards of his house and hid his large gun under the couch. "We taking the party to the park down the street." He told us as we ran outside into the mayhem.

Police sirens blared in the distance and people were running all over the place trying to hop fences or get in their cars. I was staring long enough that I almost didn't hear Morgan shout for me to follow her. I ultimately lost her in the crowd. I started running up the street where her car was parked but could see police lights flashing close by. I also saw that Morgan wasn't even in her car. She probably had ran off with Ben somewhere.

Out of nowhere, a brand new Dodge SRT pulled up beside me. The window rolled down and I met Kentrell's eyes from the driver side. "Come on, guh!" He told me. Without thinking, I hopped in the passenger side and within an instant, we were racing down the street, away from the sirens.

Inside Kentrell's car, it was dark. He had tinted windows and it smelled like pine, weed, and his cologne. The smell was actually nice. He had his playlist on a low volume. We actually rode in silence until I saw that we were on I-110 south, heading towards LSU.

"Where are we going?" I asked him, finally breaking the silence. He looked at me out of the corner of his eyes, taking puffs of his blunt.

"I'm hungry and I ain' get no barbecue." He told me. "We going to Canes."

I looked at the time and my eyes instantly bugged out. His clock read 2:00. I was in a fuck load of trouble. "Shit." I mumbled and I heard him chuckle.

"You might as well get sum to eat. You goin' home to a ass-whoopin'" He laughed, handing the blunt to me. That irritated me.

"Nah, I'm good." I declined his offer and he looked at me.

"Saddity ass." He said. "You too good fa' loud. What you be doin'? That white people shit?" He asked me and I frowned at him.

"I smoke weed. I just don't want any from you." I told him. I saw him smirk at me.

"Tell me sum, Chocolate," He started...

"It's Ranada." I corrected him.

"Right, so, Chocolate," He looked at me with this 'I said what the fuck I said' look on his face before he continued, "why I ain' neva met you?"

I looked at him as he continued to drive. He had so many tattoo on his neck and arms. He had his ears pierced and his hair was starting to dread out. I was trying not to stare at him but I couldn't help it. Ooh, girl, he is so damn..."Fine." I spoke out loud. His head snapped in my direction.

"What?" He asked, confused. "Say, shawty what'chu said?" He asked.

My cheeks were on fire. Bitch, you are embarrassing. "Um...I don't know." I said quietly as we pulled up to the Raising Canes. I grabbed my bag and handed him my credit card as we pulled up in the drive-thru line. It was long as hell.

"I got it." He told me, not even looking in my direction. I was confused. Didn't this nigga just get out of jail? What type of money does he have? "I'm tryna figure out why I ain' neva seen you befo'" He started, making an expression like he was thinking it over in his head.

I shrugged. "Maybe we just don't remember each other like that."

"Nah, I would've remembered yo' face." He told me, truthfully, with a grin. "And 'pending on what would'a went down, you would'a remembered me, fa' sho." He smirked.

At this point, I was full blown scowling at him. "I doubt we've ever met then. I would've remembered these whack ass attempts of you trying to flirt me." I folded my arms over my chest.

"See that's ya problem, na. I ain' even tryin' and I already know you fuckin' wit it." He said, his grill gleaming.

"Is that so?" I questioned. This nigga delusional as fuck...but sis, he's fine as fuck, too. "You are so charming." I said, dryly.

He chuckled lowly. "You playin' right na, but you gone see for real. I actually am a charming ass nigga." Kentrell was bragging and smiling like it was true. It may have been but I didn't know him.

"I wouldn't call a guy who calls me "bitch" without us knowing each other "charming"." I responded.

"Mane, Chocolate, you mean as fuck. You needa chill. It was used as an expression." What the fuck?! "You so uptight. When's the last time you had some dick?"

"First off, Kentrell," because he really had me fucked up, "it's Ranada. Not fucking 'Chocolate'." Seriously, what's with the calling me everything but my government name? "Second, you don't need to be concerned with whether I'm getting dick or not. I already have a daddy, I don't need another one." I told him. "Besides, just because a girl isn't jumping up and down for you to talk to them doesn't mean they haven't had sex."

That must have pissed him off. "Say, guh, you need to watch yo fuckin' mouth. Who the fuck you talking to like that? I ain' no hoe ass nigga. I'm just tryna talk to you but you actin' like a pure bitch." He seethed while glaring at me. His jaw clenched. Oh, girl, he got big mad and looks good as fuck.

Any other time, knowing me, I would've pushed him to the limit to see what he was really about, but I didn't feel like arguing with him in that moment so I just decided not to say anything. We sat in silence for a while before we finally pulled up to the intercom speaker.

"Hey, hey, hey, want some chicken today?" The girl spoke in the intercom.

"Uh...yeah." He said. He ordered his food and I felt him tap my thigh. "What'chu want?" He asked

"Nothing." I said, not in the mood to deal with him. He smacked his lips and turned back to the intercom.

"Get me a three-finger combo with a lemonade." He called out a second order. Oh, so he's a deaf nigga? The woman gave him his total and he pulled forward. "You hungry, you just mad at me. I ain' did shit to you. This really me bein' friendly right na." He said to me. Bitch, he's not lying.

I continued to let him talk his shit as we got closer and closer to the front of the line. By the time we had got the window the girl looked at him and started panting. "Oh my god! It's Youngboy!" She shouted and he started laughing.

"Say, chill, mama. How you doin?" He said. You could hear him smiling. I turned and gave a confused look. Youngboy? Where have I heard that name before?

They continued to chat while he was waiting on our food. She talked about how she was a fan of his and how she couldn't wait for him to come out with another project since he was out of jail. She then motioned towards me and asked a question. "Oh, you with your girlfriend?" She asked, sounding a little upset. I rolled my eyes inwardly, with my arms folded. Girl, you can have him. We are NOT together. I didn't say anything though.

"Yeah, she mad at me right now, but hopefully these chicken fingers work some magic." He told her winking at me. I shook my head but started smiling. That actually was somewhat cute.

He smiled and told her to keep the change once he gave her a $100 bill. Then he grabbed our food and left. We drove to a nearby park and sat in the car with the radio volume low. I looked at my bag of food, my stomach grumbling...but because I was being stubborn, I didn't grab it.

"Say, guh, why you ain' eatin'? I know you hungry. I hea' ya loud ass stomach." He spoke, talking with his mouth full of food. He eats with his grill in his mouth? Yikes. His teeth can't be that ugly.

I looked at the bag of food that was for me and then up at him. He took a big bite out of the self-made chicken sandwich and nodded at me. Unable to refuse my appetite, I pulled my bag towards me and started eating my food. "I'll pay you back." I told him after swallowing my first bite. Fuck, Canes is so good.

"Mane, I already told you, it's on me." He told me taking another bite before looking back at me. "You ain' gone live to pay me back anyway. Ya moms is probably heated right na." He laughed and I scowled at him. "You gone be alright, Chocolate." He said.

I was super annoyed with him and my new nickname that he had given me, but my mind drifted back to earlier today. I dug into my bag and pulled out the notebook that had his paper on it. "I, uh, found this in the trash." I told him.

Kentrell looked down at the folded paper then back up at me. "You read it?" He asked, quirking an eyebrow up at me. I nodded, unable to lie to him. Even if I did, something about his gaze told me that he would know. He chuckled. "You weird as fuck. You be reading a stranger's shit?"

Damn, that actually kind of hurt. I wanted to slap the shit out of myself for displaying my hurt feelings, but I couldn't help it. He has been doing nothing but judging, name-calling, and implying the worst shit possible. "I was just trying to...I don't know, never mind. She didn't even read the paper." I said, referring to Mayweather and her horrible attitude towards him. "It was a good list." I said truthfully.

"How?"

I shrugged. "It was you being open, I guess. Like you said, you're a stranger so what do I know?"

I could feel Kentrell's eyes on me; most likely sizing me up or thinking about something. Then, threw his trash out of the window and started up his car. Well, I guess the conversation is over.

He was speeding down I-110 and I was lowkey terrified. I was thankful that there weren't too many cars on the freeway and that the police were nowhere to be found. When I saw the exit that led towards our side of town, I started preparing for whatever punishment my mom was going to give me.

"Where you live?" He asked me, quietly over the music that was playing. I gave him my address and within the next 10-15 minutes, we were pulling up to my house. He parked out in front of the small gate that was around my house and looked at me. "You dead." He told me, snickering like a little kid. I rolled my eyes before gathering my things.

"Thanks for the notice." I told him before opening passenger door and getting out. I had opened and closed the gate behind me, ready to walk up to the door when I heard his car door open and shut.

"Chocolate." He called. I turned back towards him, cursing myself out in my head. Bitch, when are you gonna learn to not answer to anything else but your name? He nodded towards me, signaling me to come over to where he was. We stood opposite of each other at my gate, he was just staring down at me. "You forgot this." He told me, handing me his note from earlier today.

"You want me to give this to Mayweather or something?" I asked. Bitch, you sound stupid as fuck. He started laughing at me, shaking his head.

"Nah. She ain' want it, so you keep it." He told me walking back over to the driver side of his car. "Get'cho ass up in that house before ya mama come out hea' wit' ha' belt." Kentrell offered a smirk before he disappeared inside the car. Within an instant, he was zooming down the street, leaving me to look stupid and confused.

"What am I supposed to do with this?" I asked before deciding to reopen it. I saw the small list of goals that he had wrote down, but saw that he had written something at the bottom of the page with a number below it:

Say, I'm justa nigga tryna get ta know u, Chocolate. My bad...Ranada. Call me sumtime. We can run it up about these pain songs. –Kentrell

Oooh, bitch, he is feeling you, for real. I smiled inwardly before folding the paper back up and putting it in my bag. I turned and saw that my porch light was now on, indicating that my mother knew I was home and that I was about to be in a shit load of trouble. I gulped, getting nervous. I knew that my mom wasn't going to put hands on me, but she carried herself in a way that made me feel shameful whenever I got in trouble. She had a "big bitch" demeanor and no one wanted to be on the receiving end.

I breathed a long sigh before walking up the steps and into the house. "Ranada Simone Landry..." I heard my mother's voice from the living room. Fuck. I closed my eyes, braving for the lecture and shame I was about to receive.

I guess I'll call Kentrell if I survive the night.

Been sitting with this idea in my head for a while.  I hope you all like it.  Comments and feedback are greatly appreciated.