It's been six hours and still nothing.
The clock has just struck one in the afternoon, meaning it's been six hours since Avery was awoken by her mother's sweet, but tone deaf, rendition of 'Happy Birthday'. Six hours since Avery woke up a seventeen year old. Six hours of glancing down at the screen of her phone – hoping, wishing, desperately wanting it to light up with a call from her father. And if not a call, maybe a text. One single sentence would do. Six hours since she woke up. Nine hours since she actually turned seventeen.
Luke was the first to wish her a happy birthday, texting her an obnoxious text at the ungodly hour of four a.m at which she actually arrived into the world those seventeen years ago. Not shy to tell her how he hasn't known calm since the four months of peace he had on this earth before her.
Next was her mother with her song and their usual birthday pancake breakfast in the backyard.
Her grandparents had called during said pancake breakfast, wanting to hear about her day – which had only stretched on for an hour by then – so far. This despite the fact they're seeing her later in person tonight.
Callie, Lea and Nic soon followed with texts on their own. And as if that wasn't enough Avery had to endure another – much grander – performance of 'Happy Birthday' on a video call with her four friends while she'd been sat astride her bike outside the T.H Publishing offices this morning. Thankfully, she'd had her earphones plugged in, feeling equally mortified and fortunate over the group effort as she tried to choke down her laughter.
Upon arriving to the office – panting slightly from having run up the stairs – her colleagues had offered her their fair share of birthday congratulations before kicking off the weekly Wednesday morning editorial meeting.
From a few quick scrolls through the day she knows her dusty old Facebook page is filling up with birthday wishes too. The majority of them are from her fellow classmates at Acebridge West, the generic usual 'happy birthday!', some going as far as wishing her a great day or addressing her by name. There's another few too – family friends such as Tammy and Caia, Luke's mother and sister. The latest one was posted by Barbara, because apparently a phone call and having the next few days scheduled to spend together isn't enough. To be honest, Avery could have done without that last one from her grandmother – considering she included the most unflattering blurry – mid-cake eating – picture from her sweet sixteenth. Now free for all of her Facebook friends, future potential employers and the world to see.
Even Snapchat lit up her phone with a notification on this 'special day'.
It's been a good six hours, but they're clouded by the tiniest dark spot in the horizon. There's one more person she's waiting for.
A few strings of words from the person she wants it most. But they've yet to arrive and she doesn't know if they ever will. Like clockwork, she glances down at her phone where it lies with it's screen facing up next to the keyboard of her computer. Nothing.
Some years Robert is the very first to be in touch, often along with long stretched monologues of warmth and memories. Other years her waiting stretches on all through the day until, eventually, the evening hours crosses into night – and as the days come and gone, they finally arrive. Neatly packed up, in a box alongside an excuse or two, tied together with a ribbon on top. In vain, she attempts to swallow back the lump of disappointment growing in her throat, realizing this year will most probably fall under the category of the latter.
They've crossed onto the seventh hour – yet, nothing.
♡♡♡
Returning from the printer down the hall, a stack of papers in her hands Avery stops short at the sight of Ethan sat by her desk. Her lips pull into a faint smile as she leans her side against the wall, watching him spin in slow circles on the swivel chair. Her smile only widens as she spots the petite With Sprinkles on Top cakebox in his hands.
"Is that what I think it is?"
His spinning comes to a stop, feet planted firmly at the carpeted floor as he flickers his gaze from the box in his hand to where she's stood, lips cracking into a grin as she walks over to him.
"In case you find yourself on a deserted island," He says, handing her the box along with one of the simple Ikea forks from the office kitchenette. "Happy Birthday."
A silent laugh escapes her, biting down at her lip with a smile as she drops the stack of papers onto the tabletop before leaning against the desk. "Thank you."
She's about to break into the one portion box, already tugging at the mint colored ribbon as Anna comes around the corner from the hall. She lowers her phone from her ear, a small smile on her lips as she says, "Hold that thought. Take that with you, you're dismissed for the rest of the day."
Avery pauses with the fork in the air. "Really?"
"Really?"
"Really," Anna nods, listening with half an ear to whoever's on the call – her own mic obviously muted. "It's such a nice day. Get out of here and enjoy it."
"But–" Avery flickers her eyes to the stack of papers on the desk she hasn't even gotten to yet. "Are you sure?"
Her gaze travels over to her phone where it lies between the stack of papers and the keyboard of the computer, one simple nudge with her finger to the home button revealing a screen empty of notifications staring back up at her. The second thing that catches her attention is the time above today's date. There's still hours left of her work day and she won't be back here for another five days considering she's spending a long weekend at her grandparents'.
"You won't have another birthday for an entire year – have your fun. We'll see you Monday," As Avery still hesitates Anna raises a brow. "Am I going to have to physically kick you out?"
Avery's lips cross into a smirk as she turns her head to look at Ethan who's already rolling his eyes. "Yeah yeah, really funny. Could we forget about that already?"
"Go. I'll see you Monday."
♡♡♡
Ethan leaves as she does and Avery takes her eyes off the box of cake in her hands as they're out in the stairwell, shooting him a look. "You really didn't have to–"
"Yeah I did."
Her lips pull into a small smile, pads of her fingertips tapping lightly against the box. "So... it turns out I have a few hours to spare before I'm supposed to leave for the airport," She says. "But you probably already have plans."
"I'm sorry," Ethan's lips pull into a faint smirk as they reach the landing of the last set of stairs to the ground floor. "Was there a question in there?"
"Be nice," She warns. "It's my birthday."
"I'm always nice," He pushes the street door open with an exaggerated gesture of his arm, following behind as she steps out into the warm early afternoon. He walks with her around the corner, waiting as she unlocks her bike. "And no, I don't already have plans."
Straightening up, Avery drops her bag into the basket of her bike before placing the cakebox there too. She reaches over, stealing the sunglasses perched atop his head, her smile widening into a grin as he rolls his eyes.
"Good," She says, sliding them on. She nods for him to come along as she begins to lead her bike down the street. "Because cake's much better when you share it."
♡♡♡
"So, what's the verdict?" Ethan asks as he leans against the trunk of the tree they're sat by in the park. He lifts his orange Beans & Bagels paper cup to his lips. "Enjoying being a year older so far?"
Avery shrugs, resting the top of the fork against her lips as her eyes travel back to her phone where it lies in the grass. Besides a few texts in the group chat with her friends, the screen is blank as it stares back at her. "I guess."
His eyes flickers to the phone as well before he nudges her in the shoulder, scooting down to lie on his back.
"Remember when I said this cake's 'okay'?"
Her brows dip together slightly, lips cracking into a smile. "Are you trying to start a fight? On my birthday?"
The smile slipping onto his lips mirrors her, a pleased twinkle to his dark eyes as he looks up at her. "Nope."
She regards him, gaze flickering over his face as his lips twitches. "What?"
"Nothing," He reaches up, pointing his finger into her dimple and she rolls her eyes with a silent snort which only causes his smile to widen. "Want to cloud gaze?"
Moving the cakebox aside to keep it out of harm's way, she scoots down to lie next to him. Her lips twitches up in a wider smile as she gazes up at the greenery above. "Quite hard to cloud gaze when we're surrounded by trees."
"Let's crown gaze then," He turns his head to look at her, rolling his lips together. "You're so quiet today."
She keeps her eyes on the tree crown above, the blue of the sky peering out behind the green leaves. "I am?"
"Normally, you'd insulted me at least five times by now," He says. "Lost your spark?"
"That's not true!" She objects as she turns her head to meet his gaze. "Honestly, these past weeks I've been far too nice to you."
"So you have lost your spark?"
"God, you're annoying."
"No need to call me God."
A cross between a groan and a chortled sound escapes her, lips cracking into a toothed smile. "See? This is why we aren't friends."
His lips fall from their smirk into a faint satisfied smile as she turns her head back to the sky. He walks his fingers up her arm, tracing patterns over the sun bronzed skin as he scoots closer, pressing a brief peck to her shoulder. The small gesture of affection takes her by surprise, sending a flash of warmth through her veins, heartbeat seeming to still and pick up speed at once.
Despite having spend the better part of the past thirteen days together. Despite their nights at the beach and the car rides when he's taken her home. Despite the late night texts and the kisses that have become such a normal part of their routine she's lost count of how many there's been. Despite it all, it takes her by surprise. It's such a small thing, a gentle brush of lips over her shoulder. A gesture that – if one were to blink – could miss. It leaves her heart fluttering beneath her knitted tank top, the corners of her lips pulling into a soft smile, a funny feeling to her eyes – as if they're smiling too.
"I'm really glad we're not friends." She breathes, taking her gaze off the blur of green above as she turns her head to look at him only to find him already watching her – something observant to his dark eyes as the corner of his mouth lifts.
His gaze drops to her fingers as she slowly traces the lines of his palm, the way he usually does to hers. "I am too."
♡♡♡
It takes another five times of her checking her phone before Ethan leans his chin on her shoulder, glancing up at her through his dark eyelashes. "Everything okay?"
She locks her phone, tongue pressed to the roof of her mouth as she attempts to feign a smile. "Yeah."
His eyes dip to the phone clutched in her hand and she senses his hesitance even before it crosses his face. He regards her phone, then her, waiting another beat before he asks, "Are you sure?" His lips fall into the faintest purse, that crease between his eyes appearing as his brows knit together slightly. "You seem a little off."
Her own lips fall into a thrown. She thought she'd done a good job at concealing her... her what? What's the word for what she's feeling? Her uncertainties? She thought she'd done a good job not dampening the mood – apparently she was wrong.
She presses her teeth into her lip. A part of her wants to open her mouth, wants to let the words spill of her tongue but she doesn't know where to begin. And she doesn't want to dampen the mood in the short time they have together before she has to get going – even though she's seemingly already failed on that part.
What exactly is there to tell? She doesn't have a real reason to feel down. The day isn't over yet. Her father may just be very busy. Maybe he'll be in touch as soon as he gets off work. Maybe he's sat in his office right now, knowing he'll call her as soon as he gets into his car to drive home. Maybe he's been on a business trip, planning to call as soon as he gets off the plane. Maybe. Still. How long would it take to send one simple text? Something for her to smile about while she's waiting for the rest – if 'the rest' exists that is.
How does she put it into words? She's not used to put it into words – not with her friends, barely with her mother. How would she go about talking to Ethan Taylor about it?
She swallows, eyes squeezing shut for less than a second. Ethan Taylor. Ethan – who's dad isn't even here anymore. As the realization of the cruel reality dawns on her she knows she can't even begin to speak about what she's sat being sour about. For all she knows, that birthday wish may very well be on it's way.
She's brought out of her silence as the pads of his fingers lightly graze her jaw, gently cupping her chin to get her to look at him. She rolls her lips together, chest filling with warmth at the feel of his fingers on her skin, as she meets his inquiring eyes.
Making her decision with a small shake of her head, she says, "I'm just tired."
He regards her for a beat, again that flash of hesitance crossing his features. She sees his jaw clench as he carefully flickers his gaze over her face as to gauge her reaction when he says, "I don't believe you."
"What?"
"Something's wrong. I can tell."
Again, she shakes her head. "It's nothing."
"I know we're not friends, He nudges his knee against hers, causing her lips to automatically slip into a smile. "But you could tell me. If you want to."
Her eyes cast down to the small piece of cake left in the box as she picks up the fork where it lies next to it. She jabs it into the pastry, using the edge of the box to help scoop it up. "I'm just tired."
"Okay."
And though she sticks to her excuse and though he doesn't push it further she lets herself fall back into his embrace as he wraps his arms around her, his chin still resting in the dip between her neck and shoulder.
♡♡♡
Avery glances up from her phone as Ethan tucks a fallen strand of her hair behind her ear, lips twisting into a small smile. His brows are slightly knit together and she sees him cast a glance towards the locked screen – notifications still blinking empty – as well before letting his hand fall back to his side.
She should be going. Dropping her phone into her bag, she rests her palm on top the saddle of her bike as she looks at him, aware this is the last time she'll see him in days. She should go – she's already pushed time enough, knowing she'll have to pedal with all her force to make it home in time to leave for the airport at the hour she and her mother plan to. Still, she lingers behind.
"I'll see you in a few days?"
"Don't watch all of Brooklyn Nine-Nine without me."
Her cheeks tighten with her smile. "Don't have to worry about that – my grandparents are very pro non-screen activities. Think boardgames."
He takes a step closer and she bites down at her lip, chest heaving as her breath seems to still, as he gently brushes his thumb over her cheek. She tilts her head back ever so slightly, mouth pursing with a soft smile as his finger hooks beneath her chin.
"Bye Waters."
She loops her arms around his neck, squinting at the sun out of the corner of her eye. "Bye Taylor."
She smiles into the kiss. It's short, gentle – barely a brush of warm lips against her own. She should take a step back, let her arms slip back to her sides. She should swing her leg over her bike and get going. She should. Her eyes flickers over his face, pressing her lips together as she watches the slight rosy tint creep onto his cheeks beneath her gaze.
Lifting one of her hands from where her arms rest on his shoulders, she slowly lets her fingers sprawl through his hair, twisting one of the soft short brown curls around her finger. A silent snort escapes him and she raises her brows, knowing he's just as aware as her that she has to get going but he doesn't object as she continues by letting her fingers softy trace the lines of his jaw. She walks them over his cheek, letting her index finger run down the slope of his nose and his lips twitches with another silent snort.
"What are you doing?"
Her gaze flickers back to his as she lets her palm cup his cheek, eyes fluttering close as he brushes his thumb over her lips, running it along the curve of her mouth before letting her bring his lips to hers again.
She loops her arms closer around his neck, hands sprawling mindlessly through his hair as her chest curves into his. Her heart's hammering rapidly in her chest as if they've picked up pace, and maybe they have – she can't tell. Everything else fades away as time seems to both slow to a stop and go by in a blur at the very same instance. Their hands move around – fingers brushing over cheekbones, tracing jawlines, pushing through blonde waves, knotting in dark curls.
Her eyes flutter open as he retreats only to fall close a millisecond later as his lips brush against the skin of her neck before they're back on her lips.
As they pull apart she presses a short kiss to the corner of his mouth, a way to not have to let go – just not yet. An innocent brush of lips against his, and then – without meaning to – their breaths melt together once more.
She smiles as they pull apart, a slight panting to her breath matched with an airy tone to her somewhat hoarse voice as she lets the words slip off her tongue, "I have to go."
His hands drop to her waist as he nods, palms warm through the fabric of her skirt where they rest on her hips, holding her close. She smiles, cupping his face in her palms as she runs her thumbs slowly over his cheekbones, inching her head forward to press a kiss to his lips.
She bats her eyes open as she pulls back, resting her palms upon his chest where it rises and falls along his breath, the beat of his heart slow beneath her touch. She lets him intertwine their hands, lips in a faint smile as she tries to calm her heart – but it continues to race as her eyes gaze over his face.
"I really have to go."
He lets go of one of her hands, still holding onto the other as she forces herself to take a step back. And then another, the air suddenly seeming cold as she's no longer in his embrace. Their hands slowly slip from one another's grasp, fingertips brushing over palms before they let go of each other completely.
She swings her leg over her bike, kicking back the kickstand.
He smiles, pushing his hand through his hair. "Have fun."
She squints at the sun, smile mirroring his. "See you when I get back?"
"Yeah, see you Waters."
She pedals away down the street away from the city centre, already sensing the sea breeze as she rides towards it. Her smile twitches into a grin but soon falls into a flat line as she turns the corner to bicycle along the rows of B&Bs. Her tongue presses to the roof of her mouth as she does her best to keep her eyes set in front of her, focusing on her goal of getting home as soon as possible, willing the realization beginning to dawn on her to slip away. But it's there and once again her heart is hammering hard in her chest, palms clammy around the handles as she lets it dawn on her that maybe – just maybe – there's more to Ethan Taylor than a pretty boy who happens to be a good kisser.
♡♡♡
"May be quite an unusual birthday dinner but I'd say it was quite good."
Avery shoots a smile over her shoulder at her mother as they toss out their trash. "It was really good."
She grabs her drink from where it's stood on the table next to the trash station and hooks her arm in her mother's as they steer steps out of the Starbucks at Raleigh-Durham International Airport, heading for their gate and the plane that'll take them to JFK. That'll take them to her grandparents' welcoming arms.
Boarding's already in full swing as they reach the gate and Avery finishes the last of her chai, throwing it out before getting her boarding pass scanned with a smile from the gate agent. Before she knows it she steers her steps down the passenger boarding bridge, lips pulling into a small smile as her mother gives the plane a gentle pat before they step on board.
She sinks into her seat, taking one of the straps of gum from the package her mother extends her. Already scrolling through the few albums she has downloaded for offline mode on her phone, she pops the gum into her mouth and casts a final glance at the screen before putting the device in airplane mode. She even taps the little icon for messages to make sure there isn't anything hidden behind it that she's missed, swallowing back a small wave of nausea as she comes up empty-handed.
The small voice in the back of her head trying to remind her of what a great day she's had is soon drowned out by the disappointment leaving a bad taste as it catches in her throat, doing close to nothing to make her feel better. Plugging her earphones in, she holds her finger to the volume button – turning it up high as they roll out of the airport, glancing out the window as the plane slowly creeps towards the airstrip, pressing play.
. . .
hi friends! (we're all friends here, right?) just wanted to say I think you're the very best.
I hope you're all doing well <3
this is the part where I tell you to follow me here on wattpad and on socials (link in bio) to keep up with my ramblings and updates but if you're already tired of my ramblings on here maybe refrain from socials. or just come join the party. your choice!
much love, always yours – L.