[AN:
Songs: "Poison" by Brent Faiyaz, "Pacify her" by Melanie Martinez]
LEVI'S POV (from the night before)
I tried to slow down my breathing. I was panting.
"C'mon captain, it's time to go to sleep, right?" she whispered softly, like she was trying to reassure me. I could sense her eyes traveling all over me, but I couldn't even dare to look at her, so I continued staring at the door's handle beside her right arm. Then I saw her raising her hand to her chin, massaging slowly all the way to her jaw and cheek too. Did I hurt you? I hurt you. Why did I react like that? What got into me all of a sudden?
I grabbed her hand. It was my fault. I shouldn't have acted like that. I'm sorry. Daphne, I'm sorry.
While I stopped her right hand with mine, I slowly raised the other one, cupping her cheek. Her skin felt so smooth... so silky under my touch. Did I hurt you? Then, I placed my palm on her neck, moving slowly my thumb on her jaw. Does it hurt? Tell me where it hurts. Daphne, I'm sorry.
I wanted to tell her, to tell her how sorry I was but my pride silenced me. I only stared at her.
Her eyes trembled. As far as I could tell she wasn't sad or even afraid, she rather looked... embarrassed? Her cheeks got suddenly red. Maybe I am actually making her uncomfortable. I should stop. I should just let her be. And so I did.
I sighed soundly and after stroking her cheek once more I left, without saying a word. What a coward. I really was.
I quickly rushed into my room, shutting the door behind me with all my strength.
What got into me? What was I thinking? Conflicted thoughts populated my mind. I'm sorry.
I know I should be suspicious of her. We still can't fully trust her. Even though... She is actually behaving herself. Since we arrested her, she didn't anything wrong. She's always neat, her uniform tidy, and her scent, her scent it's making me going crazy these days. She smells really good, like something sweet and warm. Anyway...she's never late or rude to anyone – well except for those who deserve it... and me. I quite deserved it too. I wasn't the nicest to her either.
She did well at her training sessions, during the assembly and then she even helped Hange and Eren. The way that night she apologized for Farlan and Isabel, what kind of criminal do such a thing? She's probably a decent human being.
And yet, I needed to make all this up, act bossy all the time with her to test her, to test her loyalty. I should just continue like this, after all, I am the captain and I should be impassive with her. I cannot make exceptions. I cannot, even if she smells good. Even if she comes from the underground, just like me. Even if she worked as a prostitute, just like my mum. How could I possibly forget what she told me last time? I'm the only one who can actually imagine the pain she's been through.
And yet, I acted like a dick all the time. That being said, I can't even treat her better just because I pity her or else... Even though, I don't think is pity what I feel for her... However, four-eyes is right for once, I should just cut her some slack. If I want her to trust us, I firstly should trust her.
First thing in the morning I picked Eren up and we went to the cafeteria. This time, as I was preparing Daphne's breakfast, I foolishly thought about getting her a bigger plate, full of everything I could have found there before that flock of brats came. What am I even doing? I'm glad Eren didn't ask me anything about it. He was still too afraid of me to stick his nose in my business... and to be honest, I didn't even know what I could have ever answered if he'd asked. What am I even doing?
However, she was already there. On-time, as always. So, I handed her the plate and the cup I had prepared.
She definitely noticed the difference. She smiled at me, giving me a better look at her face, illuminated by a ray of sunlight, coming from behind me. I checked over her face and neck to see if there was any sign of yesterday. She noticed me checking her too. She looks fine. She even looks tranquil. I'm glad.
Nevertheless, I discharged both of them soon after and went outside to meet the rest of the squad. I informed them that both Eren and Daphne would have traveled with us to the castle.
"Tch, really? That girl is coming with us?" I heard. I knew it was Oruo.
"Exactly. And you better watch your mouth this time or that will be your last words. Understood?" I spat.
"Y-yes, sir"
"You are a boor sometimes, Oruo" said Petra.
Once Eren and Daphne had joined us, we departed. During the trip Petra tried her best to interact with Daphne, asking her pretty general questions. They look so different and yet so similar. I observed them the whole time. At some point, we arrived and the castle looked worse than I expected. It was a mess.
"Listen up everybody. I want this place spotless" I commanded "Let's start from the inside. Eld, Gunther you two will take care of the towers and the last floor. Petra, Oruo, the dorms and rooms on the second floor. Eren, Daphne, on the first floor. Then we'll proceed with the rest of the building when the other soldiers will join us"
"Yessir" They shouted in chorus.
DAPHNE'S POV
I patted Eren on the back "Let's go, buddy". In response, he only snorted.
The captain provided us with all the essentials for cleaning, therefore we started straight away.
"So, captain Levi is a clean-freak... I thought it was just a rumor" said a quite annoyed Eren.
"Well, how could you blame him? This place looks like a dump" I replied.
"It's not only about cleaning..." Interrupted us Petra entering the room "He wants everything spotless, to the point where he can see his reflection on the surface" she lightly laughed.
"Oh, Eren try not to look so discouraged" she then continued "You Daphne, on the other hand, you don't seem that much bothered by it"
"Cleaning is not a big deal. The satisfaction after it is the reward, I suppose"
"Oh no, she's one of them!" playfully shouted Eren.
I laughed, he looked so silly "When I was younger, I was the one in charge of the housekeeping – If you could call that a houseI thought - among my... - sisters?- sisters, so I'm kind of used to these things"
"Oh, so you have sisters! Are you the oldest?" cheered Petra.
"Not really, but I've always acted like I was-"
"More cleaning, less speaking" said Levi entering the room. He started sifting through the whole room, passing his index on each surface. Though we did work hard, so he couldn't complain much.
"Since you're almost done here, Daphne you'll go downstairs and start cleaning there. Eren when you'll be done with those curtains, you'll help her out down there. Understood?"
"Yessir" we answered in sync.
And so I did. When I passed beside Levi to leave the room, he looked at me with a glimpse of satisfaction.
Once there, I could smell something strong, which was almost intoxicating me "I better get to work... This place looks more like a basement rather than a prison. I wonder how low it goes...".
A little curiosity sparked in me. This is an old military base. This place goes a couple of levels under the ground. What if this place could hide some passage? Could that be possible? When I was looking for secret passages to get my sisters out of there, I remember reading about the undisclosed routes used by soldiers to get a faster way to the underground. Could I-?
Completely distracted by my own thoughts, I tripped into something. What the heck- a handle? Could it be a... trapdoor? To the underground?
I wasn't overthinking it too much and I promptly opened it. Dark, I can't see a damn thing...Well, now or never, let's go. The descent was very difficult since I couldn't see much, but I tried my best to follow the walls of the pipe. At some point I suddenly fell into a hole, hitting hard on my spine. That must have been a dozen meters.The pain got even worse when I realized how dirty it was. I was completely covered with mud and dust. Once I had recovered a little, I tried to look around me. My eyes already got used to the dark and I could see a couple of corridors in front of me, one of them more illuminated than the other. Here goes nothingI thought getting closer to that corridor.
The light was feeble and it came from a couple of manholes on the ground. Oh my...And then I saw it. The underground. Right there. Its pungent smell. Its lifeless colors. Its desolation.
Damn, how high am I right now? I could never make it from here... unless... unless I could use my 3d maneuver gear. I could use it. I could and I will. Maybe tonight or tomorrow night, if Levi doesn't follow me. There's no other way. I don't know the surface. I would never make it to the underground traveling around the districts up there. I don't know where to find a gate to the underground. Instead, this passage will take me right where I want to go. This is my only chance to escape. I'll think about it, but now I really have to go before they realize I'm gone.
Going back, I heard some noises coming from above.
I rushed back but I found myself stuck in the middle of the corridors where I had fallen before. The hole was too high and the place too dark.
"Oi, are you there?" I heard coming from above. Is that Levi? Oh no... oh no... ok, don't panic. Don't panic.
"Captain?? Is that you??" I tried to scream like I was scared or else.
"Take this rope" he shouted.
"Ok, I'm coming up"
I started to climb, but the mud on my hands made me slipped twice. I eventually made it almost to the end of the rope, but still I couldn't see anything. I suddenly felt a hand under my forearm and another one behind my back.
"C'mon you're almost there" I heard Levi saying, pretty close to me.
He caught me off guard with that move and I almost fell. But in that position, he was able to catch me. I practically collapsed on him as we ended up on the ground, in a sort of weird embrace.
"Are you ok?" asked Levi, only a couple of inches from my face.
"Y-yes. T-thank you for rescuing me..." I stuttered.
"Eren, couldn't find you, so I rushed here..." Did he rush here? To find me? Oh yeah. What if I escaped, right? What if your dear prisoner made it out of here?
"What the fuck were you doing down here?" He continued, getting up. His tone had suddenly changed. Maybe he had realized that I could have actually escaped down there.
"I was cleaning and I suddenly fell in the trapdoor...C'mon, let's go back" I promptly replied.
He didn't say anything and just followed me. Once out of there, some curious scouts were waiting for me in the hallways, mumbling and whispering behind my back, as I passed between them completely covered by dirt.
Once close to the dormitory hall, Levi started to talk again "What were you actually doing down there?"
"I've already told you. I fell" I replied.
"You fell onto the trapdoor... and then walked all the way to that hole? Did you roll or something?"
"Funny. Very funny. No, I just couldn't see anything, I was so confused and then-" My fake excuse was providentially interrupted.
"Daphne! What happened- Oh, captain Levi, I didn't see you there" said Eren, running towards us.
"Ehi kid, don't worry. I'm fine. I just fell" I said eyeing Levi.
"Ok, that's good to hear. See you at the cafeteria then..." and so he left.
"If you excuse me, captain, I'll go and take a shower now. You should do as well" I said entering my room, once again next to his.
"Tch" I heard coming from him and nothing else.
Another close call...I thought. I hope he won't mind too much. But I know, he will.
It was time for me to head to the cafeteria. Leaving my room, I saw Levi coming out of his. What a coincidence, lucky me.
"Captain" I said. But again, nothing. He stayed silent, glaring at me. Then, he gestured me to follow him. I'm this close to punch him, but now I'm not in the position to make him even angrier with me. Calm down, Daphne, calm down.
When we entered the cafeteria, everyone was looking in my direction, again. Don't get anxious, don't get anxious. Maybe they are looking at Levi.
I was following Levi to his squad's table when I heard someone calling my name. It was Eren.
"Daphne, the guys wanted to ask you if you'd like to join us for lunch..."
"Ehm, I don't know if I'm allowed to..." I eyed Levi like I was asking for his permission. He left without saying a word, so I followed Eren to his table, where Mikasa, Armin, Sasha, Jean and Connie were.
They were all pretty nice to me, I must admit. We spoke about everything and anything.
"I was wondering how old are you Daphne?" said Eren at some point.
Jean immediately hit him on the back of his head "Don't you know you don't ask a woman's age".
"No biggie, your question is totally fair. I'm definitely older than you. I'm 24".
They were all impressed by my answer. "I'd have bet you were 19 or 20. However, you look younger than you are" said Connie.
"Thanks, I take it as a compliment, Connie" I softly smiled. I'm still not used to receive compliments or things like that.
Soon after Mikasa, who was right in front of me, spoke "I wanted to thank you Daphne... for the other day, at the sentence. I could have made it worse if you didn't stop me..."
"Oh, don't mention it. I was as confused as you were, but I kept my faith in captain Levi's actions" I replied straight away. She shyly smiled in response.
"Talking about the captain..." started Sasha, next to me "Isn't he staring at you?".
"No, he's probably surveillingme" I said without overthinking it. On second thought, he was actually staring at me. I sensed his eyes from the opposite side of the room. He was looking at me so fiercely, I could feel his eyes directly into my soul.
Without looking away from me, he continued eating and drinking. I couldn't tell how much time passed. "Well, if you call that surveilling..." said Sasha, like she was hinting at something else.
What the fuck does Levi want from me?
"If you don't mind me asking... But, what kind of relationship do you have with the captain?" I don't know who asked me that, probably it was Sasha again, but I was still focused on Levi. He wouldn't stop staring at me. And I felt like I couldn't look away from his grey eyes, like the first night we met, they were haunting me even from a distance.
"None..." I mumbled still staring at him "He's just plotting my death, I guess. If you can call it a relationship..." I added sarcastically, now facing the others. They all laughed and we turned our attention back to the food.
"Cadets" I heard someone saying. It was Levi. When did he arrive? "Today you'll train with the adults. Don't be late" He eyed me once more and then left.
"Yessir" we all answered in chorus.
When our lunch was over, we all headed together to a big room where the training was held. A big soft carpet was right in the center of the room, almost covering the whole pavement.
"Well, make yourself comfortable. You can stay with your t-shirt or tank top, bare chest, whatever it's fine. Then choose your partner for today. Please, try with someone you've never paired, so that you can challenge yourself a little more, alright?" said Nanaba, a veteran member of the corps, as far as I knew.
I was looking around me, thinking about my possible partner. Mikasa would be a great opponent or maybe I could ask Gunther, he seems a strong soldier.
Pondering the situation, I sensed again Levi's gaze from the other side of the room. He was sitting behind a desk with another squad leader. I was so pissed off by his staring, so I said only moving my lips "What are you looking at?".He rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to the others.
I saw some other girls taking their shirts off, staying only with their sports bra or tank tops. I still wasn't that confident to show my body to them, but on second thought that was just a training session, so I had to be as comfortable as possible. When I finished unbuttoning my shirt, I was wearing my sports bra only and I caught Levi out of the corner of my eye, once again staring at me.
So, I turned around completely to face him and I gestured him to close his mouth. He was so pissed off I could see his jaw clenching from a distance.
However, I had caught someone else attention too. Jean coughed behind my back and then said "Ehi Daphne, may I ask you if you want to train with me? You seemed pretty skilled last time..."
"Sure" I answered unfazed.
"Oh great, ah ah, perfect, perfect" he started mumbling "So let's get started, ok?"
"Ok" I said. Before he could do much, I knock him out, making him fall to the carpet.
"Ouch, that was... Ok, let me try again. Let's start again from the beginning" he said getting up and positioning like he knew what he was doing. Thus, I waited for him to attack me. I crossed my arms and stared at him.
"Oh, it's my turn. Ok, so..." and then he started to get closer to me, throwing a punch in the air. I promptly caught it, twisted his arm and made him fall to the ground. Again.
He hit the ground pretty bad, so I decided to help him out. I offered him a hand and he grabbed it straight away. Once up, he didn't want to leave my hand and he started whispering "Wow, Daphne, we need to set up a couple of sessions together. You have to teach me those moves..."
"You just need to talk less and practice more, Jean, but not with me" I whispered back.
At that exact moment, that little gag was interrupted by the one and only Levi, who was now wearing only his white tank top.
"If you want to practice, at least choose a decent opponent" he said looking at me, then he turned facing Jean "Cadet, go wash your face. Once you are back, find someone at your level. Leave her to me". Jean only nodded and run off.
"Bring it on, captain" I said, bowing. We positioned ourselves, as everybody turned around to watch us.
As I slightly moved my feet, he promptly moved towards me. I started to throw some punches but he caught them all. I was able to parry his kicks and punches too, but he was definitely stronger than me. I turned around to avoid another punch, leaving him space to attack me from behind. He locked my neck with his right arm as I tried to grab it with all my strength.
Even though I was almost suffocating, I managed to say "Us like this... It brings me back to some lovely memories captain, don't you agree?"
He groaned. I soon got out of his grip, escaping from the free side of my neck, whipping a leg back just to distract him, but he promptly grabbed it, making me lose my balance. While I was trying to not fall, I grabbed his top to steady myself, instead I just dragged him with me down to the floor. Here we were again, one on the other in the most awkward position ever, while the other scouts were watching us.
Levi seemed caught completely off guard by what happened and he just stared at me with his mouth open, breathing heavily. I didn't overthink it too much and I rapidly threw him away, switching our positions. Now that I was on top of him, I could have punched him better, but he promptly grabbed my hand again, pushing me aside and switching our position again.
"This is your punishment for lying to me this morning" he whispered, leaning closer to my ear. I was still struggling to escape from his grip.
"Captain, what are you talking about? I would never lie to you, sir" I said sarcastically, managing to push him again onto the floor.
We continued rolling all over the carpet trying to knock out the other one, until a voice interrupted that little show of ours.
"Oh, c'mon you two, get a room! There are minors here too!" said Hange laughing "Levi, spare that poor girl. I need her for my experiment tonight. Are you down for it, Daphne?"
"Y-yeah, sure" I answered. Levi was still on top of me, blocking both of my hands with one of his, over my head. So, I coughed and then said "If you could kindly take off of me, sir..."
He eyed me fiercely, then stood up and went back to his desk. Everyone also got back to their business as I followed Hange out of the room.
"So tonight, after dinner, come to the courtyard of the castle. I can't wait to introduce you to my two little children: Sawney and Bean" she said.
"Two little children?" I started asking her, with a puzzled expression painted on my face.
"Yeah, the two little titans we captured last time! Don't worry, we'll have so much fun together! See you there!" and so she left.
Still confused, I felt a couple of pats on my back "You did pretty well against the captain! You know they call him humanity's strongest soldier?" said Sasha enthusiastically.
Soon after, all the other soldiers joined us, as we walked to the dorm's hallway. I was about to turn left to my room when Petra approached me: "You stood up to Levi".
"Barely, the captain is very... strong" I replied.
"Yeah, Levi is the best" she said, underlining again the captain's name "I'm totally in awe whenever I see him fighting".
"Indeed, he is the best. I have a lot to learn from him" I said trying to cut that awkward conversation and get back on my way. What the fuck is she trying to hint?
"Well, I'm always in awe when it comes to Levi. A girl is allowed to dream, right? I think you can understand me..."
"No, actually I'm not following you Petra" I replied.
"Oh dear, I see the way you look at him. I used to fantasize about him the same way..."
"I'm not looking at him in any way!" I interrupted her, but she didn't pay that much attention to me.
"But don't dream too much" she continued "he's not interested in anything other than fighting titans. I know what you're trying to do, but it won't work" she then added, while I had already turned my back to her. This bitch...
"I think you totally misunderstood the whole situation, Petra. I don't know what you're hinting at" I said, trying my best to not lose my cool.
"A word to the wise is enough..." she said and then smiled at me. I bit my tongue and smiled back. We stared at each other like we were silently fighting. Soon after she left me there wondering what the fuck she was actually about. Maybe she's just jealous. However, I hate it when people jump to conclusions. I hate it with my whole soul.
I sighed and got back to my room. Fuck, I need another shower.
Closing my eyes under the comforting flow of hot water I couldn't stop thinking about Petra's words. And immediately his face appeared on the back of my eyelids. Levi, right on top of me, sweating and panting just a couple of inches from me. His bare forearms extended over my head to prevent himself from collapsing completely on me. His eyes trembling and going back and forth from my eyes to my mouth.
I groaned so loudly I echoed in the whole bathroom. What am I doing? Am I feeling aroused just by the thought of him? What the fuck is happening to me? I must be going insane.
I rushed out of the shower, trying to keep my mind busy, eluding the image of Levi... of Levi swinging his wet hair over my face, almost brushing my forehead. Stop. I said stop. Stop thinking about him.
I practically shoved my dinner down my throat, avoiding almost everyone in the cafeteria. I successfully made it and then headed to where Hange was waiting for me.
Once arrived I realized what I had signed for. Hange had mounted two big tents under which her "two children" were catching some sleep. Or at least were trying to.
"Daphne, welcome!" she whispered waving at me.
I waved back at her, getting closer suspiciously.
"Oh, don't be afraid. Tonight, we're going to have some fun!" She smiled widely, but I still looked quite concerned. "So, as I've already announced you, under here we have Sawney and Bean. We need to monitor their resistance in the dark, are you following me?"
"Sure" I answered straight away.
"Excellent. The first has just fallen asleep, so we need to keep up only with this one and see how he behaves"
"Sounds like a plan" I smiled at her.
"That's the spirit! Anyway, this is Lauda, one of the members of my squad and, today, my assistant" Lauda shyly shook my hand and bowed her head.
"I'm Daphne, nice to meet you Lauda" I said.
Then we entered the tent where the titan was held. It was rather annoyed by our arrival.
"Calm down, big boy, a long night awaits us" said Hange sarcastically.
"So, how long do you think it will take?" I asked her.
"The first one collapsed not long after the sunlight faded, only a couple of minutes before you came. But with this one I can't tell. However..."
"Good evening" I could recognize this voice among millions. Levi, I thought.
I didn't even dare to look at him.
"Oh Levi, I'm glad you joined us, but I don't recollect inviting you" said Hange.
"You didn't. I wanted to see what kind of freakshow you are up to" replied Levi, with his usual unfazed tone. Yeah sure, that's the reason why you came. Sure. You're not here to keep an eye on me.
He sat down on a sort of pillow next to Lauda, who was right at my left, but slightly rotated in my direction.
"Cadets" he said, greeting us. "Captain Levi" Lauda replied immediately.
On the other hand, I felt like my words were trapped in my throat. Still not looking at him, I whispered "C-captain".
It's really going to be a long night.