It'd be really nice if everyone else could take into account your inability to wake up on time.
The coffee shop was always busy, but this was something else. It was already 9:00 in the morning by the time you'd even placed your order and here you were at 9:08, still standing in the shop.
The baristas were working frantically behind the counter, scrambling to get all those orders ready. You'd tipped them extra because of it and knew they were stressed but hell, so were you.
Your usual barista headed to the pick up bar, setting a few drinks down and calling out names.
"Iced hazelnut latte for Zena!"
Your head snapped up.
Zena.
Why did that name sound familiar?
You watched as a woman - this Zena, presumably - walked to the counter and picked up her drink. She had bone straight, jet black hair that reached just below her jaw line. You noticed her deep red lipstick as she thanked the barista and picked up the cup.
She didn't look familiar though. And you certainly would've remembered a woman that looked like her.
So why was her name familiar? You'd heard it somewhere...
Hux. The night of the gala.
Zena.
She's been mentioned once and then you hadn't heard her name since. All you knew was that Kylo had some strange reaction to the mention of her name and Hux had used it to mess with him.
If that was Kylo's ex then you just gained about ten new insecurities in about ten seconds.
"Two iced vanilla lattes for Moe!"
Well, you'd put the order under 'Poe', but close enough.
You maneuvered through the crowded cafe and picked up the two lattes, barely managign to slither through the hoard of people without spilling.
It was a good thing your office was less than a block away. You made the familiar trek, quickly walking down the street and into the office, hopping into the elevator and heading to your desk.
"Ah, there's my favorite delivery woman," Poe chirped as you walked in.
"Yep, here she is only fifteen - no, seventeen minutes late," you replied.
You leaned over and handed Poe his drink which he eagerly took, raising it to his lips and taking a long sip. If there was anyone with a worse caffeine dependency than you, it was Poe.
Poe sighed and leaned back in his chair. "Nothing beats overpriced lattes." He was about to take another sip from his drink when he paused, narrowing his eyes at the cup. "Wait, who's Moe?"
"You." You placed your bag on the floor by your chair. "Who's Zena?"
Poe's eyebrow knit together. "You? Is that how this game works? Are we changing our names?"
You rolled your eyes and turned your computer on. "No, Moe is what they heard when I said Poe," you explained. "But do we know anyone named Zena?"
Poe's face creased in concentration. "Not that I know of."
You sighed and took a sip of your latte. Poe studied you from across the desk, twirling the straw with his finger. "Why do you ask?"
"Complicated but someone mentioned her name a while ago and I never found out who she was," you explained. "And I'm a nosy bitch so I want to find out who it is."
"Fair enough," Poe said.
It shouldn't be hard to find out who she was. Zena wasn't a common name as far as you knew. And odds are, she had something to do with real estate developemtnr, architecture, or design if shed attended the gala. Maybe even engineering. After all, the world desperately needed more women in STEM.
Sure enough, you found the woman you were looking for after a couple of different searches. Her full name was Zena Torr, owner and founder of Zena Torr Interiors, a major design firm in the city.
That certainly explained why she was invited to the gala. Odds are, her company has worked with the First Order on a lot of projects.
"You made that weird noise," Poe said. "Did you find it?"
"Yep." You turned the computer screen as Poe leaned over to take a look. "Zena Torr Interiors."
Poe's eyes scanned the screen for a moment before a smile broke out on his face. "Should've called it Interior Torr. Or like Interi-Torr."
He grinned like an idiot, you glared at him.
"If you keep saying shit like that I'm not even going to have to steal your husband," you taunted. "He's just going to leave your ass."
"No way, I have him way to whipped," Poe said with a laugh. "Trust me, he - what the hell is that?"
You pulled your eyes away from your screen to look at him. "What the hell is what?"
He pointed at you. "Oh, just the huge hickey on your neck."
Your eyes widened in horror and you reached for your bag, digging around for your compact mirror. And sure enough, you looked in the mirror to see the red mark that was no longer covered by concealer.
"Son of a bitch."
You fidgeted with your hair, sweeping it to one side to try and conceal the evidence. The office had a casual dress code but blatantly displayed hickeys was too far. Luckily, you were able to decently conceal the red mark with your hair.
"You're the bitch for not telling me you hooked up with someone," Poe said. "Who is this guy?"
As far as Poe knew, you hadn't seen or spoken to Kylo since the night of Finn's gala. He didn't know that Kylo had fucked you on the bathroom counter at said gala, but that was besides the point.
Poe was completely oblivious to the fact that you had more than just spoken to Kylo since that night. He had no idea about what happened at the gala or in Kylo's office or that drunken Friday or what occurred at your place just this past Friday night that left you with this red mark on your neck.
"Oh, just this guy in my building."
You were in too deep now. If Poe knew how much you'd kept from him, he just might spontaneously combust.
"Well that sounds interesting." Poe gave you a smile dripping in even more sarcasm than his words. "Was he good?"
You reached for you drink. "Yeah, great in bed," you replied. "Ten out of ten, would recommend to a friend."
Poe sighed and picked up a pen, twirling it in his fingers. You looked back to your computer but you could still feel his eyes boring into you like a damned laser.
"Are you going to tell me who actually left that mark or what?"
You just about choked on your drink. "What do you mean?"
Poe scoffed and shook his head. "You're such a bad liar," he said. "Who did you sleep with?"
You chewed at your lip snd scanned his face. You weren't sure why you felt incapable of just telling Poe. But you just couldn't.
"It's...complicated."
That was the understatement of the fucking year.
Poe hummed thoughtfully, dark eyes studying you. He certainly didn't look convinced snd you knew there was no way in hell he was going to let tnt go.
"Complicated," Poe repeated.
You nodded and tore your eyes away to look back at your screen. "Yep, very complicated," you said. "Know what else is complicated? This article on-
"Holy shit," Poe whisper-yelled. "It was Ren."
It was a good thing that you and Poe's desks were tucked in the corner snd not near a huge cluster of other people. Otherwise, you would've just reached over and strangled him for saying that out loud.
"For the love of all things good, keep your fucking voice down," you scolded him.
Poe was all riled up. "It's him, isn't it? You're not denying it," he rambled. "I'm right, you totally slept with him again. I knew-
"Yes, yes alright?" You groaned and placed your face in your hands. "You're right."
You stayed that way for a moment, eyes closed and palms pressing against your face. A much nicer view than facing Poe and the reality that no, you were not in fact over Ren. Far, far from it.
When you finally did look back up, Poe's face was all
business. "Drinks tonight," he said firmly. "And I don't want to hear a single excuse."
——
This was the alcohol's fault.
One and a half drinks in and you had emailed Zena Torr for an interview, throwing all logic snd ethics out the window and setting up a fake interview with this stranger.
The alcohol had worn off but the damage was done. You should've known better than to let your curiosity and need to know everything mingle with alcohol. That could never end well.
The damage wasn't technically done yet. The email you'd written was perfectly professional despite the alcohol on your system, but the damage would occur during this next part.
The email had been so professional that this woman had actually agreed to an interview. So here you were this midday on this Wednesday headed to meet the mysterious Zena Torr for coffee and an interview.
That's where the damage would be done. This inquisitive nature of yours had gotten you this career but now it seemed to be getting you into a seriously messy situation.
You took a deep breath and entered the agreed upon cafe, making a beeline for a table in the back corner. Treating this meeting like this was some high-stake espionage mission. You know, dramatic flare or whatever.
You had just sat down when the door to the café opened and in walked Zena, just as striking and intimidatingly beautiful as the first time you'd seen her.
You gestured to her, hoping she'd understand without you needed to get up and yell your name across the cafe.
Luckily, she saw you and smiled and made her way over.
Good, good, she seems nice. One point for me.
You stood up from your seat as she neared the table, smiling and extending a hand to her. "Thank you so much for coming."
"Of course," she replied. "I'm glad we could make this work."
You internally cringed. This woman seemed kind and genuine and you had pretty much tricked her into coming here. You just hoped she wasn't set on an interview and this hypothetical article you were writing about New York design firms.
A waitress approached the table just as Zena took a seat opposite of you. "Hello ladies," the girl chirped. "What can I get for you today?"
You gestured for Zena to order first, earning a warm smile from her.
"Hazelnut latte, please," she told the waiter.
Ah. Clear what her favorite drink was.
"And for you?"
"Vanilla latte."
The waitress scribbled down the orders and headed back to the kitchen, leaving just you and Zena. The latter spoke first, placing her elbows on the table and leaning forward.
"Your name seems familiar but I'm not sure why." She tilted her head. "Have we met before?"
"No, I don't think so."
She studied you for a second more before her face lit up. "Oh! I know how I know you," she exclaimed. "You wrote about my husband."
You were sure your heart completely stopped beating. Blood freezing in place, every ounce of air leaving your lungs.
Had Kylo been...married this whole time?
You swallowed and cleared your dry throat. "You're married to Ky- Mr. Ren?"
She laughed and shook her head. "Oh god no," she replied. "My husband is Tai."
It was a good thing jaws didn't make a sound when they fell open. You stared at the woman in shock, realizing that this was not at all how you thought this was going to go.
"I had no idea," you confessed, looking down to notice the ring on her left finger.
Wow. Excellent journalism skills on my part.
"You'd have no reason to," Zena replied. "I kept my last name when we got married. I love Tai to death but I'm the one that went to school and built my firm, not him."
She laughed lightly and you joined in, subconsciously relaxing your tense jaw and shoulders.
"He seems like a wonderful man," you said. "I only talked to him briefly but he seems like a great guy."
Zena was blushing like a school girl, visible pride for her husband in her smile. "He really is," she agreed. "Best man I know."
It simultaneously warned your heart and made you ache to see someone so visibly in love.
The waitress quickly returned with the lattes you'd ordered. You were grateful that you now had something to keep your hands occupied and stop you from fidgeting.
Zena took a sip of her latte, her deep red lipstick not smudging the slightest. You made a mental note to ask her what the hell brand she used that didn't immediately wipe off.
"So how did you come across Tai's accident? Finalizer did a pretty good job of preventing anyone else from knowing about it."
Shit.
You took a long sip from your latte before replying. "Someone else told me about what happened to Tai."
Zena looked surprised. "I can't even think of who would know about it," she said. "Who was it?"
You set your latte down and clasped your hands together. "Look, I'm just going to be honest," you said. "I'm not here because I'm writing an article. This is somewhat... off the record."
Zena didn't look angry at all. In fact, she looked concerned, her eyebrows knitting together as she waited for you to continue.
"I'm actually here to talk about Kylo Ren."
That got a reaction. Not a negative one though, much to your relief.
"I haven't spoken to him in years," she said. "Not since - wait, is he the one who told you about Tai's accident?"
You nodded. "He gave me a copy of the email that Tai sent," you explained. "That's what got me interested in your husband's injury."
Zena studied you, a thoughtful look on her face. You held your breath and waited for whatever she was about to say, still afraid that this would go south very soon.
"You also wrote that article about Kylo, right?"
You nodded again and Zena hummed. A small smile twitch on her lips. "He must trust you a lot then," she said. "He's not the type to give out such important information to jusy anyone."
Now it was your turn to blush. It felt like you were a teenager again getting confronted by a friend about a crush you had in a boy in your math class.
"I hope I'm not overstepping," Zena said, "but are you dating Kylo?"
You swallowed thickly. "Was dating."
She smiled at you, similar to the way Poe would smile at you when he'd figured something out. Like he always did.
"That makes a lot more sense," she said with a gentle laugh. "I knew you had to be special to him. I'm sorry to hear that it ended."
Yeah, join the club.
No time to get into that with a woman you just met. "I met him when I interviewed him for that article," you explained. "He told me about Tai a bit after that."
"But Kylo couldn't possibly know some of the information in your article," Zena remarked. "I'm assuming that was your work then?"
"Yeah, let's just say I'm not public relations office of Finalizer's favorite person," you said, laughing a bit. "Neither are all the executives I spoke to."
"Not surprising in the least," Zena replied. "Finalizer is a bunch of jackasses in suits. Which is why you need to be careful with them."
Zena's tone had grown more serious with that last sentence. You thought of those strange phone calls and wondered if that was connected to this. And you wondered why Kylo had seemed so interested in them.
"Would you mind telling me how you know Kylo?"
She nodded and licked the foam of her latte from her lips. "I've known him since college," she explained. "He's the reason I met Tai. Tai was his best friend."
Made sense. Why else would Kylo had gone through all the trouble to help you expose Finalizer? It was personal.
"Would you mind telling me how you knew that I know Kylo?"
You blushed in embarassment. "Hux mentioned your name when I went to the First Order gala with Kylo," you explained. "I don't want to hurt your feelings but when Hux mentioned your name at the gala and suggested he introduce us, Kylo just about strangled him."
She grinned. The woman had such a bright personality compared to her severe and intimidating appearance. "That doesn't surprise me. Those two have always been so dramatic."
That's certainly true.
Your brows pulled together. "I hope I'm not prying, but did something go wrong between you and Kylo? Or Hux?"
She sighed. "Well Hux doesn't really like anyone so that doesn't surprise me," she said, "but nothing bad happened between Kylo and I. Things were just different after his father died, obviously, but-."
"Wait, wait, wait. His father...died?"
She looked puzzled. "He didn't tell you?"
You shook your head. Up until a minute ago, you'd been under the impression that Han Solo was alive. After all, didn't Leia tell you that Han was the one to convince Kylo to halt the destruction of her office?
She sighed. "Figures," she said. "He shut down completely after that."
So that's why Kylo didn't want her to speak to Zena? All because he didn't want her to know that his father died?
"What...happened?"
A million awful scenarios ran through your mind.
Zena's frown deepened. "Plane crash."
You couldn't do anything but stare and let her words sink in. "Oh."
Zena shook her head, her raven hair swinging from the movement. "It's awful," she said. "I can barely think of a worse way to go out."
"And to make matters worse, Kylo didn't even let himself grieve," she continued. "He just blamed himself."
"Blamed himself?" Your eyebrows knit together. "Why would he do that?"
"He shouldn't have but he kept saying it was his fault," she replied. "His father was supposed to be leaving on another trip for the Resistance. But before he left, he visited Kylo and put his trip off by a few days."
She paused, shaking her head and taking another breath. "They got in a fight and Kylo told him to leave," she continued. "The next morning, his father took off on his trip and...
"The plane crashed," you said breathlessly.
She nodded solemnly. You sat there, stunned and heartbroken. To lose a parent was own thing, but to lose them this way was a whole other form of tragedy.
"He told Tai that if he hadn't kicked his father out then he would've delayed the trip and maybe it wouldn't have happened," she said.
The air was heavy. Your heart felt heavy, weighed down with a ridiculous amount of sadness for the man you still loved.
"And he told Tai that it should've been him," Zena continued. "Before his family situation went south, Kylo had every intention of taking over his father's position for the Resistance. That had been his plan since he was young."
Your eyes widened. "Kylo can fly a plane?"
"Oh absolutely," she said. "He took flying lessons from his father before he even got his driver's permit."
What else didn't you know about Kylo? You'd been with him a considerable amount of time and yet you clearly didn't know anything about him.
You sat their in a silence for a moment, letting everything sink in. That was a ridiculous amount of information to take in, especially when you had no idea it was coming.
"If you don't mind me asking, why aren't you still in contact with Kylo? I mean, you said that nothing bad happened."
"Same thing that happened with his father happened with Tai and I," she replied. "He blamed himself for Tai's accident because he'd helped him get the job at Finalizer."
"That's insane," you breathed. "That isn't his fault."
Zena nodded. "Tai and I both told him that, but he just wouldn't have it."
Another brief silence fell, heavy and almost suffocating.
"I know this is a lot," Zena said with a soft voice. "And I'm sure I shouldn't even be telling you all this but I am since it's clear that you care for him."
You gave her a weak smile and traced the rim of your mug with your finger. "I do."
"I'm glad Kylo knows you," Zena said. "He definitely needs people like you in his life."
You hated that you needed him too.