March 27th
Billie's POV:
We landed in New York late last night, and today I'm proposing. I'm so scared, but a good scared. I don't think she's going to say no, I'm just nervous.
Everyone that's in New York with us knows the plan, and everyone has a role in this. And if they all didn't come then I wouldn't be able to pull this off.
I was nervous before, but now that today's the day, I am so scared. I've rehearsed this with everyone, so everyone knows their role. I'm praying that everything goes to plan.
It's just about 9 in the morning, I slept on the plane but Maddie didn't. So I didn't sleep that much last night, but Maddie's slumped.
Our day doesn't really start until about 11, I have her going to brunch with Claudia and then I go with Kenzie and Finneas to set everything up and then Holden comes in later.
Kenzie and Holden weren't supposed to come out here, but I needed them to. So I was able to convince them to lie to Maddie about why they're really here.
I've been waiting for this day for so long, but now that it's here. I mean I want to marry her, but I don't want to do it today. Because I'm nervous, but I'm still going to do it.
Maddie started to move, and she nuzzled closer to me. I started running my hand through her hair.
Billie: "Good morning shorty."
Maddie: "I don't wanna get up." She whined and hid her face in my arm.
Billie: "But you have to, this is the last day we have before tour."
Maddie: "Exactly, today's the last day before tour. So that's exactly why we should sleep in."
Billie: "I'm not gonna win this am I?"
Maddie: "Probably not." She smiled and rested her head on my chest.
...
About an hour later.
Maddie's POV:
I only fell asleep for another 30 minutes or so, I was just enjoying Billie's company. And the way she was scratching my back also felt really good.
I'm kinda nervous for today, I know nothing that's going on today because Billie has everything planned down to the last little detail. She wants today to be perfect.
I don't know what her plan is, or anything like that. I know she's been planing this for a minute though because her lies aren't the best. She'd say that she had a meeting or something like that, but her meetings have been over.
I'm not mad about it though, I appreciate her effort.
I started lightly stroking Billie's hip lightly, and she moved her hand up to my face to move a strand of my hair.
I opened my eyes, and she didn't say anything. She looked down and smiled at me. I smiled back at her, she moved down so she could give me a kiss.
Maddie: "What are we doing today?"
Billie: "First, you're going to lunch with Claudia while Kenzie, Holden, and I set up."
Maddie: "All three of you have to set up?"
Billie: "Yeah, it's going to take a minute. Then I need Claudia to stall for like 2 hours, and then you and I will grab lunch. Then after that, there's more."
Maddie: "How long have you had this planned?"
Billie: "I can't tell you that." She smiled.
I sat up and checked my phone, Billie did the same. It was just about to be 11. I'm not even that jet-lagged because I've been waking up early anyway.
I got up and walked to the bathroom, it didn't take me long to get ready since I showered last night.
I was about done getting ready, all I had to do was brush my hair. But Billie came in and took the brush from me, she started brushing my hair.
I was watching her in the mirror as she ran the brush through my hair. It was cute how focused she was, trying not to hurt me by pulling on the tangles. And it was cute how careful she was around my ears cause she didn't wanna mess with any of my piercings.
She put the brush down and rested her head on my shoulder, and her hands were connected in front of me. I leaned into her and placed my hands on top of hers.
She was now watching us in the mirror, a big smile on her face. I turned around so I was facing her.
Maddie: "I love you."
Billie: "I love you." She placed a series of short kisses on my lips.
...
Claudia and I decided just to get boba cause we're not really that hungry. And now we're parked in this lookout area, overall. It's really pretty.
Claudia: "So how are you?"
Maddie: "I'm so good."
Claudia: "Tour is literally tomorrow."
Maddie: "I know. I can't believe it. I can't believe I'm going either."
Claudia: "Why?"
Maddie: "I was under the impression that I was going to London for so long, so I just thought that something was going to come up and stop me from going. And now tour is in less than 24 hours."
Claudia: "I'm so happy that you're going because you really help Billie with touring. And Billie helps you. You guys work really well together."
Maddie: "How do you and Finneas maintain your relationship if you don't go on tour?"
Claudia: "We talk and I typically fly out to a few shows and stay, but we both have our own careers and I can't just drop everything to go on tour even though I'd love to."
Maddie: "I wanna go on every tour, but I know I can't. I love the break it gives me, but like there are other things I can do for a break. But I'm scared for my career if I drop everything to go on every tour."
Claudia: "I mean the last 2 times, you've planned around Billie's tour. Trying to make sure you could go, and London was just an example of something you couldn't do because of Billie's tour. You could do it if you really wanted to, that's not what I meant. But maybe next time, don't plan your career around Billie's tour. Plan it on your time. Billie's not going to forget about you, or move on. She loves too much."
Maddie: "I know, it's like her family is my family now cause I don't have a family. And like they all go on tour so I'm just stuck in L.A. by myself."
Claudia: "I'll make a deal with you."
Maddie: "What?"
Claudia: "Next tour, whenever that'll be, I'll stay in L.A. with you and you and I can come out with some type of collaboration, and then we'll fly out for certain shows."
Maddie: "You'd do that?"
Claudia: "Of course, I love you. And the first tour that I didn't go on, I was scared too. So I want you to be as comfortable as possible."
Maddie: "I love you." I leaned over in the car to give her a hug.
Claudia: "Aww, I love you too." She hugged me back.
...
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Liked by: billieeilish, finneas, and 6,141,846 others.
madisonvoyage: i've missed new york.
billieeilish: so pretty
photosbyholden: 😎
Claudia and I shopped for awhile, we went to a bookstore as a joke and I spent way too much fucking money there. At my house, I don't use my filming room like at all. I don't know why I thought that was a good idea. I wanna renovate it to like a library or something, or a reading room. But that's an activity for after tour.
I'mma give everything I bought today to Kenzie so she can take it back to my house and it'll be there for me when I get back.
Babygirl❤️
meet me at *location* whenever you're ready.
do i have time to go back and change my outfit😂
ofc
Read at 1:41P.M.
Billie's POV:
Today can go one to two ways, it can go how I want it to. Or it can go the opposite way, I kinda wish Maddie already knew what was going on because this shit is stressing me out.
I'm relying on Kenzie, Holden, and Finneas to have everything set up by the time Maddie and I get there. I hope they can do it.
So far everything has gone smoothly, but there's still a chance shit can go wrong.
Maddie and I are getting lunch at one of her favorite places here. When she came on the last tour, She talked about this place for so long. She has not been here since we've been here. She asked to come here last night, but I convinced her to eat something else.
Maddie said she wants to go back to the hotel to change, and I need to stall for as long as possible. So she's just helping me out at this point.
I was probably at the restaurant for about fifteen minutes before Maddie showed up, and she looked fire of course.
Via Instagram:
Liked by: madisonvoyage, finneas, 9,314,140 others.
billieeilish: cute lil lunch date.
madisonvoyage: ur cuter
billieeilish: @madisonvoyage not possible
Billie: "How was breakfast with Claudia?"
Maddie: "I didn't know how much I needed that."
Billie: "What do you mean?"
Maddie: "I don't know, we just talked about the future and what would happen."
Billie: "Are you sad that Claudia isn't going on this tour? I know you guys are hella close."
Maddie: "She and I had good times on the last tour, I'll miss goofing off with her every day while you and Finneas did soundcheck. But she'll fly out to certain shows, and I'll see her."
Billie: "What are you not telling me?" I took a drink of my water.
Maddie: "Claudia said that next tour, she'll stay in L.A. with me, and we'll drop some kind of collection."
Billie: "So you're not going on the next tour?"
Maddie: "I don't know, it depends on the time, and how long. I'll fly out to certain shows and things like that. Are you okay with that?"
Billie: "Of course. Tomorrow, I'm starting a tour that's going to last 8 months and you're gonna be there with me. The next tour probably isn't going to be until next year, and that's completely fine. And I want you to do what's best for your career."
Maddie just looked at me and smiled.
Billie: "What?" I smiled back at her.
Maddie: "I just love how understanding you are."
Billie: "Shorty, I already know that you can't go on every tour and I told you that months ago. Of course, I want you to go on tour with me because you make it so much better. But I also want your career to do good, and tour probably isn't the best idea for your career."
Maddie: "I know I make it better for you, but with my career, I just feel like I held back and planned for tour. So I couldn't do hella big projects that were possible this year."
Billie: "Yeah, but you still accomplished a lot."
Maddie: "I know, I'm proud of what I did."
Billie: "And you should be."
She smiled at me, and the waiter walked over to our table and took our order.
Billie: "What did you and Claudia buy while you were shopping?"
Maddie: "We ended up at some book store, and then I decided when we get back, that I'm going to remodel my filming room because I don't use it. So I'm going to turn in to some type of library type thing."
Billie: "Why did you make a filming room if you weren't gonna use it?" I smiled at her.
Maddie: "Because in my head, I was like 'I film so many sit down videos' and I don't. I can't remember the last sit down video I filmed."
Billie: "Did you bring your camera?"
Maddie: "Yeah, I'm gonna bring it on tour too. Might film something a little spicy, but I don't plan on posting it. I want it just to look back on."
Billie: "That's cute."
Maddie smiled at me and my phone dinged.
Claudia
when do you want me to pick you guys up?
everything's set up?
will be within like the next 20 minutes?
pick us up in like an hour?
okay.
Read at 2:53 P.M.
Maddie: "What time is the flight tomorrow?"
Billie: "It's early in the morning. I think it's like 7? I'd have to ask my mom."
Maddie: "You have everything planned perfectly?"
Billie: "For tour?"
Maddie: "What else would you be planning?" She smiled at me.
Billie: "Right, um yeah. The setlist and visuals are fire. So I hope everything goes smoothly."
...
Claudia picked us up and the next step is literally the proposal. I am terrified.
Claudia parked at the start of the trail that Maddie and I have to walk down, Holden and Kenzie should already be down there. Holden is literally hiding in a bush, and I feel terrible about it. But I don't want Maddie to put the pieces together.
Billie: "Wait Claudia, can I talk to you for a second?"
Claudia: "Sure."
Billie: "Stay here." I looked at Maddie.
Maddie: "Okay?"
Claudia and I get out of the car and walk far enough away so Maddie couldn't hear us. I also had my back turned towards the car, because I feel like Maddie can read my lips.
Claudia: "What's up?"
Billie: "I can't do this. What if she says no?"
Claudia: "You're right, what if she does say no? But what if she says yes?"
I just looked at Claudia, she has a point.
Claudia: "And besides, why would she say no?"
Billie: "I don't know, I'm just doubting myself I guess."
Claudia: "The talks her and I have had, trust me, Billie. She loves you way too much to say no to you."
I let out a breath I didn't know that I was holding, Claudia walked closer to me and gave me a hug.
Billie: "Thank you."
Claudia: "Of course, now go propose to the love of your life."
Billie: "Okay."
I smiled at Claudia and then opened Maddie's car door.
Maddie: "I thought you were gonna keep me in there forever."
Billie: "I would never."
She took my hand and helped herself out of the car, she closed the door behind her and we made our way down the trail. We're headed to the same place I gave her the promise ring, but since the last time we were here, they planted some trees. They're not fully grown.
Maddie: "Why is your hand sweaty?"
Billie: "Because I'm nervous."
Maddie: "Aw, babygirl why are you nervous?"
Billie: "Because you're intimidating." I smiled at her.
Maddie: "We don't need to lie." She laughed.
We finished walking down the trail and the dock was revealed, Maddie didn't look surprised. I assume she knew where we were.
Billie: "You knew where we were?"
Maddie: "You think I have shitty memory or something?"
Billie: "Sometimes, its little questionable."
I can see her roll her eyes out of the corner of my eye, but I can also see her big ass smile.
Claudia was right, Maddie has literally no reason to say no. And I know she's in love with me. So it's fine.
We need up on the dock and the sun was just setting, low-key blinding me. But it's worth it. Maddie has her left hand blocking the sun from her eyes, so she can see me.
Billie: "So I brought you here today." I said in a funny voice and we both laughed.
Billie: "Sorry, I just can't take myself serious right now." I chuckled to myself.
Maddie: "I don't know what you're doing, but take your time."
Billie: "Okay um, what happened last time we were in this spot?"
Maddie: "You gave me a promise ring."
Billie: "Today we're doing the same thing." I made eye contact with her, and she had her eyebrows laced together. And then her eyes went wide.
Maddie: "Stop fucking with me." She smiled and playfully pushed me back.
Billie: "But I'm not fucking with you." I can see the tears in Maddie's eyes. "God damn, I'm nervous."
Maddie: "Why are you nervous?"
Billie: "Because this is a lot, and I want it to be perfect." I exhaled. "I really don't wanna sound corny, but it's going to. Since the day I met you, I knew you were special and I knew I wanted you in my life forever. No matter what we were, I'm grateful that I get to call you my girlfriend. but if would be a blessing to call you my future wife."
I let go of her hand and got the ring out of my pocket. I got down on one knee, my heart is beating so fucking fast.
Billie: "Maddie, will you marry me?"
Maddie: "Of course." She whispered.
I lightly took her hand and placed the ring around her finger, it fits perfectly. Maddie locked her hand with mine and I stood up.
Billie: "You're mine forever." I kissed her forehead.
Maddie: "You're mine forever."
------------------------
hiii!
november has been the hardest month of my life but i got through it, im doing okay now. deadass since october my life has been strange and idk. just things that i never thought would happen have happened, and yeah. but im cool now.
and thank you guys for being patient with me ily.
i think there's gonna be one more chapter, just because i wanna wrap everything up, and if i end it here, its very quick. so expect that in another 2 months. im joking, kinda.
thanks ily lots.
words: 2967.