ELARA FELT AS IF THE ENTIRE WORLD RESTED ON HER SHOULDERS.
But it was just Draco's - and somehow, that was everything.
She knew if she brushed him off now, he'd crumble. He'd retreat inwards and lock himself up in that cage of ice and indifference and never show himself to her again.
But she didn't want to even think about what would happen if she told him the truth.
How much she thought about him. How much she wanted him. How everything he'd just said had awakened something in her that she'd been forcing down since that cold night in Hogsmeade.
The fact that she may be falling for him.
But she couldn't tell him that - even when he'd been so open and so vulnerabe with her.
Half of her was sure he'd backtrack immediately, laugh in her face once she admitted it, call her a whore again -
So instead, she said, "It wasn't Harry."
Draco blinked, his hand slowly unfurling from the fist it'd been in. He flexed his knuckles, as if realising for the first time that they were bruised and bloody. "What?"
"It wasn't Harry in the..." She swallowed hard, shivered as the breeze drifted by. "Corridor. You know, kissing -"
"I really don't need to be reminded," Draco cut her off, dryly. "Then who the fuck was it?"
Elara flushed pink. "Paul - Paul Flint."
Draco stared at her. "You were going to fuck the Head Boy of my house?"
"I didn't even know he was Head Boy!" Elara protested, indignantly. "Also - is he even any good?"
Draco made a strangled sound in the back of his throat and Elara smiled. "I'm kidding."
She cleared her throat, wondering what to say. She didn't think she would be able to get the words out, even if she tried.
Draco seemed to see her dilemma. "You don't have to say anything," he said, softly, and she marveled at how much strength that must have taken for him. For him to be so vulnerable and not expect anything back.
Elara nodded, slowly, wrapping her arms around herself and Draco's eyes dimmed. He looked ready to leave.
Elara didn't want him to. She'd always thought he'd been the one terrible at expressing his feelings but here she was, unable to get a serious word out, after he had launched into a whole monologue about her.
"Draco," she started, dropping her arms away from herself and stepping towards him, carefully.
"Why are you not at the Ball?" He was retreating into his shell again - all emotion wiped from his face.
Elara's stomach sank. "Why don't you take a guess?" she asked, gently, moving another step forward. "Why am I here, freezing my arse off in the cold, instead of back in the ballroom, warm and drinking punch and dancing?"
He didn't answer; only looked at her, warily.
"What could be here that I want that isn't at the Ball?" she pressed on, coming to a stop in front of him and tilting her head back to look at him.
Draco's eyes flicked between hers and he released a shaky breath. "I don't remember being a 'what'."
Elara shook her head and when he tried to look away, cupped his face and brought his gaze back to hers. "Draco - what I - what I feel for you -" She hesitated, felt him inhale, sharply. "What I feel for you is complicated and confusing and -"
"I know," he breathed, looking at her with suddenly bright eyes. "Trust me, I know."
"But it's not because of your father or your last name or your house."
It was a simple phrase but she could tell it had hit him straight in the chest; it was written in the twitch of the muscle in his jaw, the spasm of his fingers.
She knew it meant everything to him.
"Everything that goes on here," she went on, softly, not tearing her eyes from his, "is because of you and I. Nothing else comes into play. Okay?"
Upon seeing the look on his face, she clarified. "Although I would love to have your last name one day, it's not something I judge you by today."
As soon as the words rolled off her tongue, she wished she'd never said them. It wasn't the time to joke - he'd snap at her, shove her away. Draco and jokes about marriage didn't seem to mix well.
It had only been a joke -
"Elara Malfoy." His voice was lower now, a rough edge to it that made Elara burn. "Sounds nice."
Elara's anxiety slipped away. "You taking a joke? That's new."
She stepped back just as he said, "Must be the dress." He looked her up and down again, a slow gaze that set her alight, his eyes burning into her. "Is there a reason you're wearing Slytherin colours?"
Elara breathed out a laugh, her mind still reeling from everything that had just occurred. "Let's just say I was trying to impress someone."
Draco scoffed with a roll of his eyes. "Someone? You impressed half the fucking ballroom."
Elara sent him a sideway glance, hearing the possessiveness creep into his tone. "But the real question is," she purred, "did I impress you?"
Draco's eyes searched her face as she continued, "You're the only one I'm trying to impress."
His tongue darted out, wet his lips, and he reached for her.
She let him rest his hand on her cheek, dragging his thumb across her cheekbone. She sighed, something in her chest expanding and warming her to the bone.
"Consider me," he murmured, brushing aside a strand of her hair. "Thoroughly impressed." The corner of his lips quirked up. "Although I would like to see what you look like with it off."
Elara rolled her eyes but was unable to keep the smile off her face. "You're insufferable."
Her pulse was still pounding from Draco's speech and the butterflies in her stomach wouldn't stop fluttering. She didn't think she'd ever get tired of the feeling he gave her.
She brushed past him, rested her forearms on the railing, looking out over the grounds.
He joined her. "I have something for you."
Elara's eyebrows shot up and she turned to look at him as he snapped his fingers, a small, emerald green pouch appearing inside his palm.
Elara's eyebrows furrowed as she took it from him, feeling the soft, velvet material under her fingertips. She glanced up at him. "Draco, there was no need for a -"
He grasped her face in his hands, smoothed out the frown on her face before stepping back. "Just open it."
The blood rushed in her ears as she loosened the opening of the pouch and tipped the ring out into her hand.
Her breath caught in her throat, her knees weakening, as she looked down at the silver snake ring with emeralds for eyes. The same one she'd complimented when she'd gone to see Draco in the infirmary.
"It's the counterpart of mine," Draco said, quietly, lifting his hand to show her his, wrapped around his index. "My mother used to wear the one you have when I was younger but she stopped a long time ago."
Elara couldn't seem to form words, her pulse beating hard in her neck. "No - I can't - This is your family heirloom -"
"And I want you to have it," Draco interrupted, looking down at her. His eyes were unreadable.
Elara struggled to speak. "But - But your father will -"
"He won't miss it," Draco replied, easily. He flexed his hand again, wincing, slightly, as he looked down at his split knuckles. "It's not really a Malfoy heirloom. It comes from my mother's side - the Blacks."
Elara's stomach somersaulted as she turned the glittering ring over in her fingers before sliding it onto her right index finger - right where Draco had his. "It's - It's so beautiful."
She met his eyes, reaching a tentative hand out to take his good one. "You really didn't have to."
He shrugged, casually, as if he'd just given her a pen and not a heirloom that had been in his family for centuries. "I realised I never got you a Christmas present," he said, lightly, before looking down at their intertwined hands. He dragged his thumb across her knuckles and the feeling made Elara melt.
He let go of her hand, turning to lean on the railing again, forearms pressed against it.
But Elara didn't turn - she just kept looking at his side profile, the straight nose, sharp jaw and messy hair. And pink, pink lips.
Elara would never be able to explain the giddy, bubbling feeling that rose in her chest, that spread outwards and made all of her tingle. It was a sensation only Draco could give her and Merlin, was it addicting.
She stepped forward, chest brushing his shoulder and he looked over at her, questioningly, before she grasped the sides of his face and kissed him.
He was caught off guard but responded almost instantly, his mouth fitting against hers like they were made for each other.
His lips were warm and soft - she didn't know how when they were out in the cold - but it was intoxicating and she felt tendrils of electricity fizzle down to her core.
He didn't move off the railing, keeping his arms over it, his hands loosely clasped together but kissed her with such intensity she felt she was floating.
It had been so long since they'd kissed - he hadn't kissed her the night in his bedroom and they hadn't even talked for the two months before that.
Draco finally lifted his hand furthest from her and brought it to her cheek, sliding his tongue into her mouth.
Elara sighed in bliss and he pushed off the railing, turning to face her at last, raising his other hand so he was cradling her face now.
The rings on his fingers were cold and Elara dragged the one he'd given her down his jaw.
Rings. How she loved rings.
Suddenly, she gasped, pulling back. "Wait - wait -"
Draco pulled away, immediately, looking at her with dark eyes, confused.
"I have something for you too," Elara breathed, catching her breath. "But it's in - it's in the common room."
"Later," he said and was moving to kiss her again. She let him give her one last lingering kiss before she pulled away again, his mouth straining to be near hers.
"Now," she told him, looking up at him with bright eyes. "Come on, you'll love it."
He rolled his eyes but the good-natured glimmer was not lost on Elara. "Fine."
|
The castle was empty - everyone was at the Ball - so it was relatively easy to get to the Ravenclaw Tower without being seen.
"How exactly are you going to sneak me in?" Draco had asked as she'd pulled him along through the deserted corridors of the castle.
"I don't need to," Elara said, cheerfully. "The first, second and third years will all be asleep in their beds - they always are at this time - and everybody else is at the Ball. And we don't have the Fat Lady to tell on us if we sneak someone in - our eagle knocker only asks riddles and if you get it right - "
Draco had pushed her into an alcove to kiss her then, his hands gripping her waist, and she keened into him, a weak protest, as his mouth slanted against hers.
"Forget I asked," he breathed, kissing her jaw before stepping back again.
She linked their hands again, not wanting to be far from him for long, and set off again.
"You can break me easily without touching me or seeing me. What am I?"
Elara stared at the eagle knocker, struggling to concentrate when Draco's thumb was dragging over the back of hers and his lips were brushing against her neck.
He'd barely been able to keep his hands off her the whole way here and it had made Elara's brain slow and murky.
"Elara Jacobs," Draco murmured, answering the riddle as he pressed his mouth harder against the spot where her jaw joined her neck. "Just the thought of me is enough to bring her to her knees."
He smelled intoxicatingly like cologne and green apples and it caused something to curl in Elara's stomach. She rolled her eyes at his answer anyway. "Very funny," she huffed, shoving him away so she could think.
"Oh, come on," Draco said, straightening, his hands still resting on her hips. "It's easy. A promise."
The door swung open, instantly.
"Really, and you call yourself a Ravenclaw?" Draco taunted, kissing the shell of her ear. She sent him a murderous glare and dragged him into the common room. "Bloody hell - what's with the stars?"
Elara blinked at the stars on the ceiling, small supernovas exploding and showering them with tiny specks of starlight. "I prefer this over your dungeon chic."
Draco chuckled, breathlessly, following her up the spiral staircase and falling silent as they passed the dorms where the younger students would be sleeping.
Elara pushed open the door of her dorm, still clutching Draco's hand and pulled him in.
He kicked the door shut and had her pressed against it in a second, his lips coming down on hers, roughly.
She threw her arms around his neck, allowing herself to kiss him for just a moment, before she wrenched away and shoved him back.
He groaned low in his throat, surveying her with dark eyes as she hurried over to her bedside table and opened the drawer.
"The only thing I want to do right now is kiss you and possibly fuck you against the door and all you want to do is -"
Elara's core tightened at his words and she turned around to face him, clutching a small box.
"Keep your hormones under control," she quipped, approaching him.
"Then you better change out of that dress and into something a lot less appealing," he shot back, raising an eyebrow as his eyes took her in again, gliding down her body, resting on the exposed skin of her thigh. "Even though Merlin knows, I'd still want to fuck you."
"Hush," she chided, trying to gather herself together. His words were threatening to send her spiralling off the edge and she knew she'd never be able to stop herself if it got to that point. "Here."
He eyed the box, uncertainly. "You sure it isn't jinxed?"
Elara exhaled, loudly, at his teasing tone. "Keep talking and you won't get me or the gift."
He laughed, quietly, reaching out to take the box from her hands, hair falling onto his forehead as he looked down at it.
She watched his slender fingers trace the edges and then slide it open.
His hands froze and she saw something shift in his eyes.
"Do you like it?" she inquired, twisting her hands together, nervously.
Draco didn't respond for so long she thought she'd messed it all up. She never should've given him anything -
"It's a dragon," he said, slowly, pulling the ring out of the box and turning it over in his fingers.
"Yeah." Elara's voice was a whisper in the tensed atmosphere. "Yeah, I - I got it when we went to Hogsmeade for New Year's but - but I never got around to giving it to you."
He didn't look at her, just kept staring at the ring she'd got him. It was a dragon's head, mouth wide open as if it was in the middle of roaring fire.
Elara saw Draco's jaw clench and in her haste to speak, almost tripped over her words. "I saw a snake one but you - you already had that -" She glanced down at the ring he'd given her, wondering if he'd ask for it back. "And there was one with the letter M engraved on it but I - I didn't want to get you that because I didn't want you to think - more than you already do - that Malfoy defines you and there was this dragon and Draco means dragon and that's what really means something - "
Draco crossed the distance between them in three, long strides, tossing the empty box onto the bed and sliding the ring onto his finger as he did so.
Elara's breath left her in a gasp as he dropped his mouth to hers, fingers digging into the skin behind her ear.
She nearly fell to her knees in relief.
He was saying thank you.
[the next chapter is purelyyyy smut i apologise (no i don't). thoughts?]