Petunia Dursley was a very respectable woman, thank you very much. Renounced all things magical and lived like there was nothing at all odd about her family. In fact, she did so to the extreme that she pretended her nephew Harry, didn't exist.
She knew what his name meant of course, knew his story and the cause that his parents died for. How couldn't she after that blasted letter all those years ago. Really, what was that ridiculous man thinking of? You defeat one dark wizard as a baby and suddenly you're incapable of obtaining pneumonia or being kidnapped.
It wasn't that she hated the freak, she resented him. She adored Lilly, her baby sister. Harry represented everything she lost, the love in his eyes when he once called her mummy. She'd pretended she didn't hear him of course, he was too young to understand the feelings that he evoked in her. Of course the little brat took that as a justifiable reason to called Vernon, "daddy."
**
"Daddy, why cants I sits on your lap too?" A small Harry Potter whispered to his increasingly red faced uncle, face tucked behind a broken teddy of Dudleys, thumb tucked securely in his mouth.
Vernon glared down at the boy, fury evident in his face.
"You want to sit on my lap too then do you Potter?" He spat. He placed the content child on his lap and allowed him to get comfortable, before standing up quickly and deliberately, causing the sleepy Harry to fall from the height his uncle had been holding him at to the floor.
"Whoops," Vernon whispered, a steely glint in his eyes. "Come boy," he spat through clenched teeth before throwing the shaking toddler into the back of the cupboard under the stairs.
**
She remembered that day all too well. The scared child screaming in anguish in the cupboard.
**
She hovered outside the boys cupboard hearings his hiccups and sobs, knowing tears would be falling down his face soundlessly, like every time Harry cried. He wasn't a bad kid really, he made no noise and did what he was told, but he got Lilly killed. Petunia would have found it easier to love the child had he been boisterous and disobedient and had come from Vernon's sister, at least Lilly would be alive, her sister may have been there with her at that very moment had things worked out differently.
She undid the locks on the cupboard, not knowing wether to regret her actions or not. Vernon had taken Dudley out for the day after that mornings episode with Harry, before "they both got contaminated with the freaks freakish business."
Harry lay there sobbing, arms around the rippled teddy bear crying mercilessly into his hands. Petunias heart yearned to pick him up and console him like she knew Lilly would do if Dudley had been in Harry's position, but the couldn't bring herself to do it. Instead the lifted the child gingerly out of the cupboard, before setting him down outside the bathroom. She wiped the never ending stream of tears away from his face and let the boy compose himself.
She stared at the teddy with disdain before going into Dudley's room and collecting one of his mass of teddies before handing it to Harry. "This must stay in your cupboard," she whispered. Harry nodded happily, overjoyed at the prospect of a new friend.
She lifted the ratty old teddy out of Harry's arms, seeing the protest and fight in his tiny green eyes she picked him up also before explaining she was merely fixing the shabby bear. And so she did.
As for Harry, he had the most wonderful day. He was fed twice, allowed to play with Dudleys toys, had his bear fixed and gained a new friend.
'Perhaps Aunt 'tunia could really be my new mummy,' he pondered,' but Uncle Vernon can't be daddy, not ever, ever ever."
**
Vernon knew of course, when he saw the happy face on the child and the lack of cries.
"Some people, pet," he explained, " do more good being dead than being alive." She understood the hidden message of course, he was just trying to help Harry back into the fate that he had not long survived. After all, muggles were just as good at killing than any wizard.
She wouldn't let herself get close to the child after that, looked after him barely. She couldn't bear to see another relation of hers dead at the hands of magic so she renounced the small boy with the green eyes and the curiosity for everything and the ever prominent spark of life. She left him to fade and be broken, left him to a fate worse than any killing curse. She left him to the hands of Vernon Dursley, who hated all things abnormal vehemently.
She never forgave herself for killing the boys sparkle and hope in the world. She could have saved him, protected him. She had failed her only sisters little boy, perhaps she was the greater evil in the family, Petunia thought miserably. She could have saved Harry but no one listened to the little boy when he told of the abuse, no one hugged him when he screamed at night and no one consoled him after a punishment.
Petunia Dursley, hated herself thank you very much, for breaking a small child named Harry Potter.