Chapter 11
A cold reward
“We should head back.”
Jupiter slowly wakes me up from my slumber, but I don’t want to wake up just yet. The grass is so comfortable to lie on and I’m using his shoulder as my pillow. I dreamt about a million butterflies and they were so pretty. I want to run around and chase them, but that wouldn’t be possible. It was just a dream.
“Home,” I whisper. “Do you think I can get stronger? Will I be able to actually run with you in the forest one day?”
“If you eat well and train more,” Jupiter says gently. “This is the perfect pack to start in. Ask your mother or your Alpha.”
I get up into a sitting position. I feel deeply worried by my weakness. I know I never can be physically strong like the other wolves, but I can become as good as I want to be. I must try harder. I must eat more and focus a lot.
“I should start by walking back,” I decide and reach down to pick a few berries on a small bush. “Blueberries,” I whisper to myself and stuff them into my mouth. The great taste explodes in my mouth and it is fantastic how a small berry can hold such a rich flavour.
Jupiter grabs my hand and I hug his arm quickly before he starts dragging me out of the clearing and into the trees at a fast pace. It doesn’t take long before I start panting. My muscles are screaming from the fast movements and my head is slightly dizzy. I trip on an old branch that has fallen off a tree and I wonder why it is lying there.
*
A picture shows inside my head how a kid climbed the tree but fell off it when the branch snapped. He scrubbed his knees but he just laughed and jumped right up into it.
“Tom!” the girl in the same age yelled scared at him. “I don’t like it out here and Mother told us to be careful on our own.”
“Nothing is out here, Mary,” the boy said irritated by his sister’s worry. “Let’s have some fun!”
“I don’t want to ruin my uniform,” she pouted and looked longingly after her brother as he ran through the forest in search for a greater adventure.
*
The flash ends there and my tears start falling. They could have been eleven? What did I do when I was eleven? I was not climbing trees; that’s for sure.
“Jupiter, can we please slow down?” I beg and he looks down on my tearstained face with a frown. “The forest is showing me memories. A history was written and I wasn’t here.”
“Don’t give up so easily,” he pushes me. “I know you can do it a bit more. Think of the reward when we get back!”
“I want ice-cream,” I add longingly. “I haven’t had an ice-cream since I was five.”
“Lucky, I never had any ice-cream.”
I push every step to keep up with Jupiter, but I’m still slowing us down. I look around the forest and feel better when the Wolf Spirit’s assuring smiles make me stronger. I’m sweating and thankful for the cool air that’s blowing through the forest. I would never have been able to walk like this on Rosalea without dropping dead down onto the ground. The exercise is making me feel hungry and I welcome the gnawing feeling in my stomach.
Jupiter enters his spirit form when we are closing in to the village, but I can feel his spirit arms still holding me in a tight grip. I slow down a lot now that he can’t force me to follow his pace and I drag my feet behind me.
I’m starving and completely exhausted. I want to lie down on the grass and sleep for hours, but then I would miss out on my reward. The freezer is stocked with chocolate and vanilla ice-cream and I need it. First I’d like a glass of water for my dry throat.
“Kate, are you alright?” Adam wonders and runs up to me when I enter the garden. His sapphire eyes are glistering in the sun and I lose my ability to breathe for a second. He’s so beautiful!
“I took a fast walk, that is all,” I tell him and walk right past him into the house.
He follows me into the kitchen and stop abruptly when I see Mary’s herbs lying around the kitchen. I slap my forehead lightly for my stupidity and put my mouth under the tap and let the fresh cold water slide down into my mouth. Who needs a glass anyway?
No one would touch a single herb on Rosalea if I left them wide open for anyone to touch. What if any other than Mary thought it was ordinary tea and tried to drink them? Fear slides through me at the thought. One cup can’t kill, but it would make a healthy person feel ill.
How do I break the news to my family about Mary’s disease? I feel scared at the thought.
I look at Adam who seems to be inspecting me and I put my hand on his cheek. The touch makes his eyes glimmer with warmth. I lean in and he wraps his arms around me. His strength can be my strength.
“Why don’t you take a shower and change into a clean set of clothes?” Adam suggests. “Mary and I will make lunch.”
“I want ice cream first.”
“Take a shower first. Then you can have ice-cream and lunch, how about that?”
“Fine,” I groan and wonder how dirty I am for him to want me to shower so badly. I’m so used to my wild life and nightly bath that I feel quite filthy. “It will be a quick shower!”
I return to the kitchen fifteen minutes later and I feel quite jealous by the fact that Adam, Mary and Leanne are having fun without me. I glare at the tree of them when I enter the room and they fall quiet at my angry presence.
I am wearing a yellow sundress with white spots all over it and it feels luxurious to wear a new piece of clothing for the second day in a row.
“You two better not flirt with my mate,” I mutter and walk straight to the freezer and pull out the whole package of ice cream.
“Hello to you too!” Leanne laughs and runs up to me. “I love ice-cream!”
“Surprisingly,” I add dryly and give Adam a pointed look at the shelves where the bowls are.
Mary leaves the room while we set the table for dessert and comes back with a dry white towel. She walks up to me determinedly and put the towel on my head so she can dry my hair with it.
“You were dripping all over the place!” she says and I sit still until she’s satisfied with the result. “There.”
“It’s not a big deal,” I mutter. “It’s just water and I usually let my hair dry by itself.”
Adam fills my bowl with ice-cream and I quickly pick up the spoon and put a small piece of the white and brown coldness into my mouth. It melts on my tongue and I moan slightly. I close my eyes just to feel a pair of warm lips being pressed to mine. I open my mouth in surprise just to feel his tongue slip in. Hot sensations fill my body and I wrap myself closer to kiss Adam back.
“That’s disgusting!” Mary says from behind me.
“No, they are cute!” Leanne says with a sigh.
Adam pulls away to my disappointment and his eyes hold a mischievous glint. My heart is beating like mad and I can hear Adam’s beating just as hard.
I tilt my head to the side and give Leanne a thoughtful stare.
“I just don’t get it,” I say out loud. “Why aren’t you and Tom all over each other? How do you resist the pull?”
“What pull?” she says rolling her eyes. “There is no pull. I’ve known Tom all my life. Mates feel a huge attraction for each other so they won’t overlook their love. Tom and I don’t need that because we are neighbours. I have an ordinary crush and would only feel the mate bond if we were apart for a long time.” She looks blushing down into her own bowl.
“What about you, Kate?” Mary says hesitantly and takes a seat on the chair across me. “Father told us not to push you, but what happened while you were gone?”
I take another spoonful of ice-cream and feel lucky that I can eat it without problems.
“I was taken to an Island in the ocean world. They let me run around freely there. It wasn’t so bad.” I shrug, not in mood to upset Mary the slightest about the bad details. “I still felt like a prisoner and it took many years to find a way out of there. I am so happy to be home again. You can’t imagine how much I missed you all.”
“Were they nice to you?” Mary asks and tears starts piling up in her eyes.
“They were. John who took me saw me more as a prize and treated me well. The Wolf Spirits kept my hope alive during all the years. Otherwise I might have given up and let them brainwash me completely.”
“Don’t give the Wolf Spirits so much credit,” Mary growls unimpressed.
“Don’t comment about something you don’t know anything about,” I growl back at her and she looks up intimidated. “You might not like them, but they were my only friends out there.”
“How can you know for sure?” Mary sighs. “Why did they let you be taken to start with?”
“John wasn’t under influence of the Wolf Spirits when he attacked us. You can’t blame them for what happened. It is over and I am back now.”
“All the years we lost then?” Mary looks sadly at me.
“I didn’t waste all my time there,” I tell her softly. “I studied hard and got myself an expert education in medicine herbs. What did you do?”
“What I did?” she says impatiently and rubs her head. “I did what everyone expected me to and not a bit more. I trained the Ninjan ways in hope of finding the man who ruined our lives so I get to execute him.”
I look at Leanne and Adam who are sitting uncomfortable on their chairs, eating in silence. Adam is not from this pack and Leanne has this aura that tells me that she never could hurt another being.
I put two and two together with the faint memories from the Ninjan Pack and my mind is taken to the Ninjan training field. The prisoners I felt Tom with this morning are lined up on the grass, weak and gloomy. Mother is standing with her twelve year old students and I can feel the fear in the air.
“I will never kill another person,” I say out loud. “That goes against everything I was taught on Rosalea. The Ninjan Pack however seems to be teaching kids how to kill others. Did you do it, Mary?”
“Yes, I did,” she says without an ounce of guilt. “I pretended it was him. It felt good.”
“I want to see it,” I say quickly and rise from my chair.
My heart is beating fast by the hard truth and I have already forgotten about lunch. I always knew what happened in the Ninjan Pack, but I couldn’t grasp the truth in it. The smallest children are not allowed to see the brutal training sessions so I never came across it before. All three walk with me down to the training area where Mother is holding a lecture before the hunt begins.
I don’t actually want to see the prisoners get slaughtered, but this one time I need to. I could never take another life and look as confident about it as Mary does. Probably everyone I know are experts in killing. I would have been just like them if I wasn’t taken.
It makes me feel horrible. Killing is a crime no matter what the guilty person did. I wouldn’t mind to see John dead, but I would hate to be the reason of another person’s death. Death is what made John crazy to begin with and all the prisoner’s relatives might feel the same thing as my captivator did.
That makes me shudder even more.
We reach the arena where the training grounds are and it didn’t change much since I was here last time. A big field of grass is surrounded by the seven stone steps where people can sit. A handrail goes around it on top, made of darkened wood. I put my hand on it and let my real eyes take in the sight. Seven students are waiting to slay the seven prisoners. Their hands are tied behind their backs. Tom is keeping a watchful eye on the prisoners along with two other women.
“This is your first time performing real executions,” Mother tells them seriously. “I will not grade you for it today, but you aren’t leaving this course without killing yours. If you wish to leave the course, I ask you to do that now. That will be the end of your Ninjan specialized career.”
“I quit far before this stage,” Leanne snorts next to me. I look at her and her eyes rooms so much anger, anger I can relate to. “None of them will want to walk out. They are already in love with all of this.”
I feel sorry for Leanne and the dilemma she is in. She can’t leave the pack because she doesn’t want to leave her mate behind. I don’t actually think she wants to leave the pack; she’s just against the violent parts.
“You can choose to shift or not,” Mother continues when all the students remain at their spots. “Let the execution begin. Prisoners, please state your crime when I walk up to you.”
She walks up to the first prisoner and give him a stern glare. The man is shaking of fear. He’s quite thin and nothing special to look at. He must have done something horrible to end up with a death sentence, but I just can’t see it in him. He seems to be regretting his actions, but some actions are far from forgivable.
“My name is Pierce Thompson,” the man stutters. “I set my friend’s house on fire and all five in the household died. Please give me a fast kill. If I could go back in time I would have it undone!”
“Chicken,” the menacing looking man next to him says with a smug grin just to receive a rough kick from the female guard behind him. “Feisty aren’t we?” Mother walks up to him and he spits on the ground in front of her feet. She doesn’t even blink at his attitude. “I stabbed my mate’s sister and her three children. They deserved it for stealing what belonged to me!”
“Oh, I wonder why your mate left you,” the first guy says sarcastically, pushing his fear aside.
Mother just walk up to the third in the line, which is a red haired young woman. Tears are rolling down her cheeks, but not for regret. She has lived a hard life and suffered a lot from it. She seems to look at death with relief from a life in a Pack that wasn’t there for her.
“I stole whatever I could to survive and I killed many for it. It is time for me to pay.”
Adam puts his hand over mine and squeezes it tightly.
“I read her file,” he whispers to me. “You wouldn’t believe the things in it.” He shakes his head. “Poor girl.” He eyes the prisoners with sadness, knowing he can’t do anything to stop them from meeting their punishment. “They have been through a trial and were sentenced by The Werewolf Security Force.”
The rest of the prisoners state their illegal activities but only the first man seems to be plagued by his actions.
“We have now heard their crimes,” Mother says loudly. “You are allowed to run and meet death by our choice. It is all up to your executioner.” She bows to her students. “Let the hunt begin.”
Some of the prisoners starts running for their life, but two stands still. Two of them shifts and move quickly over the arena. My heart is beating fast as the small students are chasing down their chosen kill. I am trying to imagine Susan’s oldest son Sonny with them, but it is impossible. One boy and a girl shifts into their wolves and runs after the two men who shifted.
I watch the arena being turned into a fighting field. Wolves are fighting against wolves and humans against humans. The first one is killed quickly without a fight. I sense the spirit of that soul as it vanishes in the thin air after bowing to the Wolf Spirits. The children are smart and strictly trained. They are smaller and can easily dodge the hits and kicks. The prisoners are weak in both mind and body but a few of them put up a good fight and slam the students down to the ground more than once.
“Rise again!” Mother shout at them and keep a watching eye at the scenery.
She is not worried for her students, she trained them into good fighters and they move expertly around their targets. The prisoners doesn’t stand a chance, but it takes thirty minutes before the last one takes his last breath.
“Tend to your wounds!” Mother calls out. “Well done, everyone.” She then turns around and looks me directly into my eyes.
I take a step back at the challenge in them. There is no way that I will let her teach me to become a monster. There is blood all over the arena and Tom and the other two women starts cleaning up what’s left of the bodies.
“Kate, are you alright?” Leanne asks worriedly. “Was it too much for you?”
“I’m alright,” I tell her strongly. “Don’t worry about me, I’ve seen it before.”
I then give my sister a pointed look and all three of them look away from me. None of them can ever understand how it feels to watch someone they love be slaughtered like the ones we just saw die. If they did that they would be able to watch any kind of horror in the eye too.
“Let’s go back and eat lunch, shall we?” Adam suggests and puts his arm over my shoulder.
I’m not really hungry anymore, but I follow them back to the house without complain. I’m exhausted and wonder if I even will be able to stay awake long enough to eat something. Mary and Adam quickly pull out and set the table for a chicken salad they must have made while I was taking a shower.
A salad shouldn’t be too hard to get down. I close my eyes and reach my mind out to the spirits. I pray for them to make sure that the souls from the killed wolves went to rest peacefully.
“Are you tired,” Mary asks and fills my glass with lemon water.
“Yes, I didn’t sleep well last night,” I tell her honestly. “I’m not used to sleeping here. I like to hear the sounds from the ocean put me to sleep.”
I stop talking when a burn goes through my chest. Ocean and the familiar surroundings of Rosalea will always bring me mixed emotions. I loved the Island and I hate the reason I was kept there for.
“The ocean sounds fantastic,” Leanne says dreamingly.
“Yes, the sea world is very still,” I tell her and fill my plate with a small portion of food. “Nothing much happened there.” Nothing and everything.
I take a small bite from the grilled chicken and the taste of it… It tastes like home. A flavour I have long forgotten about. I chew on it for a long time just to save the taste. It disappears down my throat without bigger trouble and I spend the rest of the meal like this. The other three are quickly finished but Adam stays with me while I finish my lunch. Mary and Leanne continue their work in the garden and I don’t mind being alone with my mate.
I feel quite proud of myself for being able to eat all of it without throwing up. I feel so relieved that no one is watching my eating habits like a hawk. I think that was a big reason why I couldn’t eat. I am home, so I can finally relax.
I look around to notice that the herbs are still scattered around and I sigh deeply. It will take a few hours to prepare all those herbs for Mary.
“Adam, will you help me put away all the bags? I will take care of them later. I need to rest now. Will you rest with me?”
He nods and does what I asked him to do. He puts the bags in the small kitchen storage room. “Today, I’m all yours.”
He then pulls me up into his arms and carries me to mine and Mary’s room. There is so much I need to tell him and everyone. So much, but so little energy.