If anyone wanted to leave school in the middle of the day, they would have to have a parent or guardian pick them up. However, with Ace, I knew it would be easy for him to persuade the principle considering she already had a soft spot for him. An orphan living with his stepmother, working after school and practically raising his half-sister- Ace knew the principle wouldn't try to stop him.
In a way, perhaps he was flouting their sympathy.
I, on the other hand, was stuck till the last period when I finally stepped out of the building into the now chilly late afternoon. I spotted Burnwood with his friends standing a little further from me and turned around immediately. Apart from an apology, he hadn't talked to me after the rave party. And neither had I told him anything. I was completely fine with taking that incident with me to my grave.
I decided to walk just so I wouldn't have to take the bus, as a result of which it took me more than half an hour to reach Ace's place. He might be at work, but seeing the state he was in, I was sure he wouldn't be able to.
I rang the doorbell and a few seconds later, the door opened to reveal Allie who grinned up at me. "Miles! Hi!"
She had a paintbrush in her hand, some green paint at the tip of her nose and her hair in a scraggly ponytail.
"Been painting have you, Allie?" I asked, smiling back at her.
She stepped back and nodded. "Yes! I'm making a misterpiece!"
I laughed. "Masterpiece I suppose."
She scrunched up her nose as if contemplating my words before she bolted away and towards the end of the corridor, where her room was located. As soon as I entered, I became aware of the soft sound of the television playing from the living room to my left. I opened the door and stepped into the living room, relief flooding through me when I saw Ace lying on the couch, leaning against the armrest. He was covered in a thick blanket, the bright colour of the television screen reflecting off his brilliant irises before his eyes finally met mine.
"Milo," he spoke with a soft smile. "Hey."
"Hey," I said. I walked over to him and glanced at the television to see that he was watching Shrek. The first part, since Fiona was still a human. "How're you feeling?"
"Fucking trash," he whispered hoarsely before straightening up. "You can sit."
I bit my lip and nodded before sitting on the couch beside him. "Do you have a fever?" I asked gently. He shook his head and sighed.
"Are you hungry?" I glanced at the half-eaten plate of nachos on the table. "I can make some real food if you want."
He chuckled softly. "No."
I wanted to comfort him somehow, but I didn't know how to. Before I could offer anything else, however, he spoke, "Just stay quiet. Be with me."
I nodded, more than happy to just be with him. Much to my surprise, he leaned into me, placing his arms around and burying his face in my chest. He pulled the blanket onto us so I was enveloped by its warmth as well. My heart hammered rapidly and I was sure he would hear it.
"A-Ace?" I stuttered, wondering if he was drunk again.
"Is this okay?" he whispered as I stiffened up in nervousness. "Milo?"
"Y-yeah. It is," I whispered back, placing my chin on top of his head and pulling him closer. I held him in my arms, our warmth melting into each other. When he spoke, his voice was adorably muffled against my chest.
"I've never hugged anyone apart from my mom. And...she died. So...I've never held anyone like this. Kinda..forgot how comforting...it can be."
He sounded so weak. So vulnerable. Like he was truly letting his guard down. I stroked his back, my heart brimming with emotions and my chest felt fit to burst.
"No one?" I asked, slightly surprised. "How come?"
"I don't...trust anyone." It almost sounded like he was whining.
"Really?" I asked, glad of the feeling of his beating heart next to mine.
"Yeah. People are trash. And I'm the trashiest of them all," he explained.
"No, you're not, Ace," I said softly.
"But you're so nice, Milo," he rambled on as if he hadn't heard me. "You're so...pure and...soft and...warm and-" he sighed deeply, "-smell so good."
I chuckled nervously as my stomach clenched. "Y-you smell nice too."
"I know," he said modestly before laughing. "Thanks."
He breathed deeply against me before I stuttered, "Are-are you drunk again?"
He giggled in an extremely Non-Ace way. "Just a little."
I sighed but didn't say anything. I was relieved that apart from being tipsy, he seemed to be alright, even if he still had the perpetually exhausted look about him.
We lapsed into a comfortable silence. Or at least, as comfortable as it could be with worms writhing in my belly. It wasn't often that Ace ever let his guard down. A rare event, but one that I loved anyway. And never before had he held me like this. It felt almost like cuddling. Although my lack of practical experience made confirming the fact much harder.
"You won't...ask me what happened? Why I left?" he asked softly after a while. I didn't say anything, my unseeing gaze fixed on the screen. I sighed and stroked his back.
"Not unless you want to tell me," I answered. "And...even if I do ask you might just ask me to drop it."
He sighed, "I...will tell you," he said. "Just...not...now."
"Okay," I nodded, grateful that he was at least entertaining the idea of telling me.
He was quiet after that. I didn't dare move, afraid that he would think I was uncomfortable and shift away. I loved his scent, his warmth, the feeling of his assuring body so close to mine. I was glad he wasn't making any move to shift either.
I was so engrossed in him. Up close, I could feel each of his breaths as his chest fell and rose, I could feel the gentle beating of his heart, a far cry from my rampaging one. Contrasting rhythms that somehow seemed harmonious. Or perhaps it was merely my illusion. I could smell the secret, wondrous scent that I had come to recognize as his. My heart jolted into my throat and I felt suddenly overwhelmed. It all felt so perfect. Surreal.
What the fuck was wrong with me? Was I falling in love with him? Or had I always been in love with him, but only just now coming to realize it?
There was no fucking way it was normal. The way I felt about him. The way I always wanted to protect him. The way I knew him. And most of all, the way he always somehow made me feel much better about myself than I truly was. Just little actions that made me feel special.
Was it going to be the classic falling for your childhood best friend trope, but without the involvement of vaginas?
A second thought formed in my head.
Am I gay?
I sighed and immediately became heady from his characteristic scent. My stomach clenched tightly in a manner that answered all my questions in an iota of a second.
Well, fuck.
I was so entranced by him that it took me a while to realize that he had fallen asleep. His breathing was uniform, gentle, and he wasn't moving whatsoever. His arms were still wrapped around me, although a little lax in his subconscious. I remained still for a while, my chest filling with warmth before I moved slowly. I tried to extricate myself from him so he could be more comfortable. As I tried to, however, he lifted his head and gazed at me with drowsy eyes.
"Where're you goin'?"
My stomach leapt into my chest. It almost sounded like he was whining. How the fuck was he so adorable?
"Er, if you're gonna sleep you should probably sleep in your room? You'd be more comfortable there," I said. Not to mention the extremely high activity for my heart in the past few minutes was probably not good for it.
He didn't say anything. I hoped he wasn't getting the wrong idea about me slipping away. He sat up straight and rubbed his eyes. "Actually, I've not been this comfortable for a long time."
I bit my lip and glanced at him, wondering if I was reading to much into everything. His face remained impassive; if a little exhausted; and he sighed, "Okay. Let's go upstairs."
I nodded and rose to my feet. He did the same, pulling the blanket close around his frame as we started slowly making our way to the staircase. With one of his arms still around me and the thick blanket around him, our progress was slow, but I didn't rush him. Slowly, we started making our way up the staircase. He walked slowly, too slow. As if he was overthinking each step.
I firmly placed a hand on his back to try to usher him forward. I wasn't sure what happened, but he seemed to misplace a step and groaned as he crumpled down. Before I could hold him, he fell. Backwards.
"Ace!"
We had only gone up a few stairs and I was relieved that he wouldn't be hurt. He had managed to fall backwards and onto his butt, entangled in the blanket.
"Ace?" I walked over to him, my heart hammering. "Ac-"
I sucked in a sharp breath when I saw his face clearly. His eyes were wide, his face ghostly pale. He shook his head and quickly got to his feet.
"Ace, are y-"
"Go away," he said. I was surprised by his words, but the way he spoke them was so strange. He didn't sound angry, or even annoyed. It merely seemed like a plea. "Miles...go...away."
"Ace, what-"
Before I could anything else, he threw the blanket onto the floor and bolted up the stairs, leaving me confused yet again. I stood at the foot of the staircase for a while, wondering if I should approach him. I supposed he was simply embarrassed to be acting so clumsy around me. Before I could quite come to a decision about following him, however, I heard the front doorbell ring and a few moments later, Misses Wilde appeared at the doorway. I turned towards her and gave her a small nod. "Good evening, Misses Wilde."
She still looked as exhausted as the last time I had seen her but smiled. "Miles. How are you, honey?"
"Just came to see Archer," I explained wondering if she would know about his behaviour. "I think he's sick."
"Oh," A dark shadow passed across her face and she sighed. "I think it's just his symptoms acting up again. If he would just listen-"
My blood ran cold, the floor giving way underneath me. "S-symptoms? Of what?"
"The Stargardt's honey. He doesn't really take car-" she stopped talking at once, her eyes wide. "Oh. He didn't tell you?"
"N-no. Nothing."
I stood still for a while, my head buzzing with a million thoughts. It made sense now. The way he would squint his eyes. The way he would flinch suddenly. The way he would drive his car into people's gardens. The way he left class in the middle.
I placed a hand on the wall, my chest breaking at the revelation. He was losing his central vision. And although I had no way of knowing the extent of his condition, I couldn't believe he had decided to take on something like that all on his own.
"H-how? W-when-?" I stuttered to a stop when I heard shuffling footsteps behind me. Misses Wilde's eyes seemed to pop out of her head and I turned around to see Ace slowly making his way downstairs, his eyebrows slightly furrowed in question.
I was too stunned to do anything except stare at him. How could he not tell me? Did he think I would treat him differently? This was what he was hiding so diligently?
"How come I never knew, Ace?" I said, gaping at him and shaking my head in bewilderment. I felt like the air around me was suddenly too thick to breathe in. "You have Stargardt's?"
He seemed to stiffen up at once and the temperature in the room dropped into negative. He glared at Misses Wilde', whose face had somehow gone even paler than her stepson's.
"You told him?" he asked. He slowly made his way downstairs with a death glare. The way he sounded made my heart wrench in my chest. "You told him?" he repeated as if in disbelief.
"Ace, why wouldn't you tell m-" I tried to get him to talk to me instead of his clearly terrified stepmom, however, he seemed the least bit interested and shoved me away with a bit too much force.
"Who the fuck are you, who the fuck gave you the damn right to tell him?"
I shrunk slightly at the at he sounded. His voice trembled in anger. Each of his words laced with destructive, venomous wrath.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, her lower lip quivering. "I didn't know that you hadn't told him."
He balled his fist, his entire form trembling.
"Ace, why would you hide-" Before I could finish my sentence, Ace left. He didn't look back as he stomped toward the main door, opening it so that it banged violently against the wall. I sprinted over to him, "Ace-"
He didn't say anything, sprinting over to the driveway and sliding into his car. I watched as he drove away and disappeared into the obscure shadows of the darkest of nights.
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This book is something new for me. I debated a lot with the major plot point of this story, and even now, I will maintain that it remains to be Ace and Milo's friendship/love rather than Ace's condition.
Many of you guys have expressed concerns about the emotional pain that might entail, but let me assure you that this won't be something that will rip your heart out. I don't intend to make it into a sad sobfest. This, however, is something heavier than what I usually write so I hope you guys will give it a chance and trust your friendly asocial birb enough to know they won't hurt the readers too much <3
Thank you!
PS: As a compensation, I will upload two chapters today :D And in the next one, one of my favourite 'scenes' will occur.