Colin managed the social media pages of Snapshot and today, for some unknown reason, the notifications were blowing up. He traced through the comments and mentions which kept popping up and eventually, he found the cause.
It was about some party that Dakota had been to, thereby the mentions. She was referred to as "an upcoming model whose rise to fame started from (at)Snapshot", this puzzled Colin and he decided to find out what the buzz was about even though he knew clearly that the business account wasn't meant for tracing gossip.
He followed the trail of tags and mentions and badly taken photos until he found a video he wished he hadn't seen.
All of a sudden Colin could feel a weight on his chest as his eyes took in the figures that moved about in the blurred recording. He couldn't identify the blond guy in the video-- the one wiping blood off his lips-- but he didn't even have to blink to tell that the other guy was Peter.
For one thing, the flannel shirt the skinny guy was donning was eerily similar to the one Peter had left the apartment in. For another, he could recognise the scowl that was plastered to his face-- he had seen that same expression so many times he could picture it in his sleep.
Colin's eyes couldn't take the sight in as the fight got even more serious, yet his eyes wouldn't budge from the screen. Peter was screaming with his eyes screwed shut, arms pulled behind him. The guy yelled out, blood-stained teeth bared.
"Bet you're a fucking fag too, huh? A faggot."
It was the pain which cut raw in his palm that made Colin realise he was holding onto the edge of the counter too hard. He had been such a fool playing with Peter's statement, brushing it off as mere play. This wasn't play.
Colin looked away when his roommate started his assault. But Peter's voice still blasted out of the phone.
"Say it again. Say. It. Again."
Static crackled as the video's focus shook, before it finally went black.
Colin's legs gave out and he found himself on the couch.
The video automatically replayed, the same words pulsing out.
Bet you're a fucking fag too. Say it again.
Over and over, he listened. Over and over, his hand gripped onto the arm of the couch, until the foam under the material covering compressed from the force.
Several moments passed before his legs carried him to Peter's door which hung open, as if inviting him in.
"Why didn't you call me?" The older boy stood with his arms crossed, eyes shooting daggers at Peter who sat in his bed with his guitar and a notebook.
"I have no idea what you're talking about. Is everything fine upstairs?" Peter's head remained bowed as he wrote something down, black hair framing his features like a curtain. It was the sound of his own voice, distorted and loud and filled with rage, that got him to look up. In Colin's hand was the device steadily revealing the events of the previous night.
"Why didn't Dakota call me, huh? Why did you keep quiet about this?" The video played and Colin saw Peter's body bend into itself as he cringed.
"I told Dakota you knew where we were going so she couldn't know you had no clue where we were." Peter shrugged, staring up at Colin through his long, dark lashes.
"Why would you do that? Do you know how worried I was about you?" The brown-haired boy's voice started to rise. "Do you have any idea how fucking scared I was?"
His question was left unanswered as the Asian only looked up from the notebook in his lap. The pen he was gripping onto like a lifeline was down, so was the headstock of the guitar.
"I woke up in the middle of the night to see you beat up again. I mean, who wouldn't get scared? Why do you keep letting this happen to you?" Colin's questions kept coming even though he had received an actual reply to only one of them. In his own ears, he sounded like a broken record repeating 'why' over and over again. Kind of like the video that was still running on autoplay. The brunet turned it off and took steps closer to the edge of the bed. "Do you get high off all these stupid fights? Do you get off on getting people worried?"
"This is why I didn't say anything." Peter scribbled in the notebook, the sound of pen on paper the only thing breaking through the silence that descended.
"This? That fact that I care about you?"
"No," he said firmly. "The fact that you're shoving yourself in my life. Everywhere I go, everywhere I turn, you're there."
Colin looked at him with disbelief, having to take a couple of seconds to process the information he heard. "Need I remind you that you're the one who asked to move in with me. And I'm pretty sure you wanted to work at Snapshot with me too. I'm not forcing myself on you, I never have. Sure, I voiced out some stuff which was inappropriate but-"
Peter interrupted with a stern look. "Well, I wish you would."
"You wish I would what?"
"Force yourself on me."
"Why would you want that?" Colin was on his knees now, looking up at his roommate, trying to understand what the boy was talking about. "Do you know what you're sayi- are you hearing yourself?"
"Yes! I'm totally aware of what I'm saying, okay? I want to hate you! I want you to do something that will make me hate you so I know what I'm feeling for you is nothing but hate. I've been a disappointment to my dad all my life and I'm not gonna add "Peter likes another guy" to that list."
"You like me?"
"He's gonna be so mad." Peter covered his face with his hands, bowing his head so far down his fingers almost brushed against his slightly bent knees. "He doesn't even know I've moved out, he doesn't know I don't live with Ivy anymore. God, to top it off, this. I'm applying for a job as a model, he hates models with a passion, you know?" Voice going low, the petite boy rambled on. "He always complained that they reveal too much skin, even the guys. What if you're right about me being an underwear model? Ah geez, I don't know what would be worse... him finding out my new roommate is a gay photographer or him knowing that I've kissed the said roommate or even the modelling half-naked thing."
"He likes me," Colin said, voice coming out in a whisper.
"Stop talking like I'm not even here."
Lips splitting into a smile, Colin crawled onto the bed. "You said you like me. Can you believe that?" His speech started to come with sporadic bursts of laughter. "Damn, weren't you... weren't you the same guy who- you said 'I could do so much better than you, Colin'" He started to laugh again, clutching his stomach. "Look at you now, Pikachu. You probably want to do me."
Peter's face reddened up to the tips of his ears. "I will punch the rest of your teeth back in if you don't shut up."
In response, Colin grinned widely as a taunt, letting his tongue run over the slant edge of his chipped tooth. "Pikachu, I don't think I can keep up with all of your kinks. But I'm willing to try."
The Asian shoved at Colin, making him laugh once again. "How did you know though?" Colin asked.
"I kissed Dakota, and I liked it... but not as much as when you and I, you know, did it. And I've-" the younger guy looked away, mumbling words under his breath and only letting his voice rise when he said, "-in the shower."
Colin tilted his head, eyes twinkling. "You say we 'did it' like we've, you know, done it."
Peter nudged Colin, whose head had started to creep obnoxiously close with that signature grin, away.
The grin disappeared when Colin asked, "And about your dad, he'll get mad if he knows?"
"He'll get more than mad. Unlike you, I don't have accepting parents. My dad hates my guts for even existing, do you think me telling him I caught feelings for a guy would help my case?"
"No," Colin admitted. "To be honest, I'm kinda in the same boat with you."
"Your dad hates you too?"
"Pfft," Colin laughed. "I'm his favorite, right now that is. If he knew I was gay I would be good as dead to him."
Peter's eyes widened, telling Colin that he never expected those words.
"Yeah, I know. The big bad gay guy is still somehow in the closet." Colin rolled his eyes. "It's only because he and my grandmother are very, very homophobic. They're the only ones that don't know. Amy and Michael do," he sighed.
The smile reappeared when Colin raked a hand through his hair. "But that, my dear Pikachu, is why I use the Christmas money my grandma sends to buy the gayest things I can find."
Peter gave him a small smile. "At least you still have some sort of connection to your dad."
"You don't talk to yours?"
"My father has hated me ever since I was born, I'm not even exaggerating." His laugh was dry, containing no traces of humor.
Colin lay on his side. "He told you that?"
"No," Peter breathed out, tucking his knees closer to him. "But I know it from the way he looks at me. My mother died when she was giving birth to me, and I think he blames me for it, he hasn't told me that but I know it's true."
"Oh..."
"Yeah. Plus, good old sibling arguments let me know that he never wanted another child after Ivy was born." Another dry laugh. "We were fighting over a TV remote, I think. And Ivy told me I was a brat and that was why our father never wanted me. That kind of made me understand why he showed Ivy more love than he did with me, you know?"
Colin hummed, eyes never leaving Peter's. He stared at the boy with wonder and a sense of curiosity, he didn't know Peter was carrying so much pain within him.
"I get him though. He never wanted me and when I came, I killed his wife. I was also the nuisance child that always got in trouble, I still am."
"You didn't kill his wife. Her death was out of your control, it wasn't your fault." Fingers holding onto the Asian's jaw, Colin brought Peter's face towards him. "You're also my nuisance now. You won't be getting into any trouble, not if I have a say."
Peter scrunched up his nose before the corners of his lips turned up. "Try and stop me."
~~
Whew, more twists and turns. At least Peter's finally admitted his feelings though :,)
Have any of you had problems coming out to your family or relate to Peter or Colin in any way? I hope things turn out all right for you. You are valued!
By the way, ya girl is writing a new book for NaNoWriMo 2020. If you don't know what that is, it's novel writing month which takes place in November every year. Authors have to write a novel- 50,000 words and above-- within 30 days.
I have decided to take part so guess what, a new book is up on my profile! It's called Shades of Ecstasy and if you're into superheroes, supervillains and everything in between that bunch feel free to check it out and support ya girl! It would mean so much to me :)♡
Special mentions: Thank you to new readers Maystory1, Eunice01 for binging and spamming my book with votes and also, frogconvert for the votes and hilarious comments. I value all of it!