Lily's POV
"Lily" Harry spoke in a soft tone.
"Leave" I said sternly, looking at my lap, I was sobbing right now, but luckily my hair was perfectly covering my face. They can't see me like this.
I heard Harry sigh under his breath.
"Lily I'm-
"I said LEAVE" I shouted towards him. Soon enough I heard the door shut close and I began sobbing into my knees.
I cried. I cried for everything. I cried for ever being born. Why was I born? Why? Why was I created. Why do I have to live a life I hate. Why can't I just die?
I sobbed for a few more minutes until I needed to release the pain inside of me.
I quickly went into my bathroom and found my razors, picking one up and sitting myself on the floor.
And so here I am, a razor in my hand and my wrist exposed.
I closed my eyes as I slit my flesh open, remembering everything that has ever happened to me.
~flashback~
How long has it been? How long have I been in the little room, tied to a bed. No light. No food. No human to talk to. It was empty. As empty as my heart felt right now.
I shut my eyes in pain when my tummy rumbled begging for food. I haven't ate in days. I've been kept in here for too long, I just want to go home. I want to just leave this place.
"Why the hell are you crying you little bitch" My Dad growled besides me. As on command, I widened my eyes. Shivers crawling down my spine.
I saw him holding a long thick leather belt, a smirk dancing on his lips. I instantly began sobbing as I saw the glint on his eye. I tried to back away which was no use since I've been tied to a bed.
"You do NOT cry" He yelled at me before smacking the leather belt on my thighs. The sound echoing through out the small room.
I screamed in pain once he whipped me again, a burning sensation traveling through my legs.
"You do NOT disrespect me" He yelled again bringing the belt back and smacking it straight across my stomache. I screamed in agony as I felt my skin underneath my shirt opening up. Tears were now freely escaping my eyes.
"I TOLD YOU TO NOT FUCKING CRY" He yelled at me whipping me twice in the same spot, which happens to be my right hand. I screamed in agony once he kept whipping me constantly.
~Flashback ends~
I looked at my right hand, tracing the massive scar which was permanently graved onto my skin. I shivered once my fingertips felt the flesh that once was opened up. I could still feel the agony of that thick belt connecting with my skin.
I closed my eyes shut as I cut again, I was desperate to escape the pain that has built up inside of me. Today is when my worst fears come true, it was proves to me, that my Dad will never make me live in peace.
When the wedding day will come, then what comes after that? A constant pain and torment.
I honestly cant believe they would just yell at me like that. They seem to have hearts made of ice.
Harry yelled at me. Niall told Harry I was here. The boys just stood and watched. Mum yelled at me and Dad was being a right nob.
He once again made up a lie and everyone believed it.
I have never smoked. But I guess my WHOLE family thinks otherwise.
I have never failed maths. I have never snuk out. I have never ever stole any money. But who am I to talk? There all "lies".
I'm just a liar
----------------------------------------------------------------------
"I'm going to kill you!" My dad yelled holding his right hand which I just threw a knife at.
I shivered and looked for an escape. Panic rose throughout my body once again as he carelessly ripped the knife out of his skin pointing it at me.
A scream was stuck in my throat, my body paralyzed to the ground. I couldn't even move a muscle.
I watched as he neared me with a blood dropping knife...
***
I shot up while taking a deep breath.
I've just had another nightmare.
I quickly searched for my phone inside my pillow, and when my hand felt it, I yanked it out and pressed my unlock button.
5:49am
Monday 3rd November 2014.
My eyes widened as I breathed in a shaky breath.
It is School. Today.
I was dreading this day, since forever really, and now I have to face it. Face him.
Earth, why do you hate me this much? I thought as I dragged myself out of bed.
My feet scraping along the hardwood floor as I walked into my bathroom.
I sighted once I caught sight of myself in the mirror.
"Mirror, Mirror,
On the wall,
Why can't I be thin, pretty and tall?" I said remembering a quote I found the other night.
I just shook my head splashing cold water all over my flesh. Trying to wake myself up and clean these thoughts from my mind.
1 hour later
"You want a lift-
"NO!" I yelled to Harry as I shut the front door in his face.
And I'm back the square 1 with my relationship with Harry and the boys.
Well good. I was getting way to comfortable and close to them anyway.
I sighted as I put my earphones in listening to sleepwalking by bring me the horizon. Simple sentence; this song is me life.
Music is probably what's been keeping me going for the past few months.
When I think back to everything. It's all to eventful.
Harry came. We din't really talk. I got excluded from school cause I punched some slut who was asking for it, arguing with my mum, went to Dads, nearly got myself killed, Harry carried me out of the house, we got lost in some woods, found a house and to my fantastic luck, it obviously had to be Parkers house. And then it went downhill from their. Now my Mum and so called Dad, are getting re-married. I do wonder what other sh*t is gonna happen.
I looked up to already see my school. Which I wasen't really happy about.
I quickly checked my messages as I entered the school gates.
No new messages
I couldn't help but allow a wave of disappointment wash over my body. I was hoping James would text me. I guess he really doesn't care about me then.
That's a shame. I though there is someone in this world that cares about... me... guess not.
I took a deep breath once I opened my locker, took my English books, and headed of to class.
Once the bell rang a sea of students appeared.
There is no going back now.
***
"For your homework, explain the cycle of Nitrogen, minimum 150 words" My biology teacher said. I quickly wrote it in my planner, and packed everything away.
The bell rang and everyone started running out happy the first day of school is finished. I just stood there and zipped my coat up, I said bye to my Biology teacher and walked out.
By now there were only a few students lurking the halls.
"Hello Miss.Styles, I've been looking for you" I heard an all to familiar voice say.
I turned around to face him, but I stared at the ground. Everything is better than to look at his haunting eyes.
"I do believe we have an after school lesson booked" He said and I could hear the smirk in his voice. I already felt sick.
"Come on then" He said leaning close to my ear. I stopped breathing, scared if I do, an ear piercing scream will escape my mouth.
"Sweetheart" He whispered.
I stood there shocked as millions flash backs ran through my head, all tied to that one little word that makes my blood freeze cold.
He smirked obviously knowing the effect it had on me, he just turned around mentioning for me to follow him.
As much as I din't want to . I knew I had to.
He held the door open for me, but I couldn't help but stare at the big note covering the door.
GCSE mathematics practice.
Please DO NOT interrupt.
I stood there frozen, all the hope I had, was just drained out of me. Just like that in a second. I'm stood here with a man I have so much memories with. Memories that are my very realistic nightmares.
I was brought out of my thoughts as I heard the sound of a door being locked.
I quickly swiped my head forward seeing Adam standing there, his arms folded, muscles flexed, and last but least, a smirk I've grown to fond of dancing on his lips.
I gulped loudly staring wide eyed right ahead of me.
"Listen here Lily" He growled, all of a sudden appearing by my side, pinning me up against the wall, his body dangerously close to mine.
My heart started thumping against my chest, speeding up by the second.
"You sweetheart" He said getting closer to my face, making me shut my eyes tightly, hoping when I open them again, his face will not be centimeters away from my own.
"Will not tell anyone about this. Understood?" He quietly yelled, grabbing my chin.
"Y-yes" I muttered out.
Suddenly his hand connected to my face. I winced in pain, my body screaming at me to run away.
"Yes what" He yelled again, his hot breath spreading all over my face, making goose bumps of fear arise.
"Yes s-sir" I said quietly looking down. And unexpected tear fell down my cheek. I blinked rapidly, trying to stop the wall of tears forming on my eyes.
"Now sweetie I haven't seen you for a long timw" He said letting go of my chin. A wave of relief washed over me. He had a tight hold and I wouldn't be surprised if a bruise was already forming on my face.
I will need to wear a lot of foundation. Again.
"I missed seeing you like this"
"All scared and shaken up" He whispered into my ear making the hairs on the back of my next arise.
"But I also missed hearing the pain filled sound coming out of your mouth...
"Every time I did this" He whispered and before I could react, a fist connected with my stomach, making me huddle over in pain.
I tried to steady myself, but there was nothing to grab.
Another fist connected with my stomach and all the air was sucked out of me, leaving me gasping for air.
By now tears were freely falling out of my eyes, soaking my face.
"That's it" He said punching me once again in my stomach, I gave up and collapsed to the ground with a loud thud.
"Show me how much it hurts" He said staring to kick me anywhere possible. I covered my face with my hands, trying to protect myself from him.
"No One Love You" He said kicking me once again. I slowly was slipping away, hanging by a little piece of string.
"Your a worthless piece of shit. Everyone wants you dead" He yelled at me kicking once more before spitting on me and leaving the room.
I was just left here. Alone.
I tried to get up, but I failed miserably, m whole body ached, so I just gave up and stayed on the floor, waiting for my energy levels to charge up. Then I can get out of here.
I hate my family even more. This is their fault.
***
Hello. Sorry for not updating, I've been having a bad couple of weeks, and updating just seemed like the hardest thing possible then.
But I'm now better and will be updating on the usual Wednesday and the weekend (hopefully).
Thank you for reading. It means the world to me
Love yoh beautifuls for everything..
Ps. Cheers ma dears for voting etc.
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