The locker room buzzes with anticipation. Half of the team is hyping each other up with pep talks and songs, and the other sits quietly and watches. Nathan watches his teammates get ready. Almost everyone is there.
Oliver leans in and asks, "Where's Josh?"
"I don't know," Nathan admits. "I haven't heard from him since this morning."
"If he doesn't show up before the coach gets here, he's going to be in so much trouble."
Nathan sighs. "Don't you think I know that?" he asks. "I've tried texting him, he's not even looking at my messages. What if something's happened? Maybe we should ask Stephens about it?"
He's barely finished the sentence when the coach walks into the room. "Settle down, guys. I know you're excited, but the game's out there, not in here." He smiles at the team as he looks around to make sure everyone's there.
Just as Nathan's about to explain that one of them is missing, Josh walks in through the door. He's already dressed in the school's colors, and he takes the seat closest to the door.
"You boys are more than ready for this," Stephen says. "If you perform as well as you do during practice, this should be a cakewalk, but don't underestimate the other team. They want to win just as much as you do."
There's a speech prepared that Nathan doesn't listen to. He glances over to Josh - who's staring at the floor - but nothing he does seems to gain Josh's attention. If anything, it looks like Josh is trying really hard to ignore him.
"So go out there and get them! Oh, and have fun too, but remember. This isn't a practice game. This is real. Go kick this season off!"
Nathan gets up along with the rest of the team, which lets out some cheerful whoops before making their way out towards the gym. Oliver glances between Nathan and Josh. "Don't worry, I'll talk to him," Nathan says. "You go on with the rest."
Josh attempts to slip out with the rest, blending into the crowd of players as Nathan tries to reach him.
"Hey," Nathan puts a hand on Josh's shoulder to stop him. "You alright?"
Huffing, Josh shrugs the hand away before taking off into a jog to join the players at the front.
It's unusual for Josh to ignore Nathan. Nathan frowns as he watches his friend dip out of sight, purposely avoiding him. The only time Josh has outright avoided Nathan is when something serious has happened.
Nathan instantly begins to worry. What could have happened that was serious enough to make Josh sulk? On a game day, nonetheless!
They jog a few laps around the court to warm up, the opposing team does the same before respective teams gather on each side of the court to talk with their coaches. Stephens doesn't have much more to say but to wish the boys good luck, and when he pats Nathan on the shoulder, the team splits up to take their positions on the court and bench.
The bleachers are filled with onlookers. They cheer when the players line up, and the referee calls the two team captains up for a quick chat.
Nathan listens carefully after shaking hands with the other captain, but he can't help but glance over the crowd to see if he can spot Jonathan. He smiles when he spots Jonathan seated at the very edge to his left. Jonathan waves at him to let him know that he sees him.
Then the game starts, and Nathan puts up the defense with his team backing him up. Their defense has always been good, but it's in the offense that they shine. They can handle what the other team throws at them, and it doesn't take long for them to snatch the ball for themselves and begin the race across the court.
The crowd whoops and cheers on one side and shouts encouragement on the other. Both sides urge their team to do their best.
Everything seems to be working out perfectly - until Josh picks up the ball.
It looks as if he's suddenly forgotten what he's supposed to do, and where he is. He stands still, with the ball in his hands, looking at it as if he's never seen anything like it before.
"Davis!" Coach Stephens shouts from the sidelines. "Do something!"
Josh blinks and deftly avoids a player that's trying to steal the ball from him. He looks up to see where his teammates are. Nathan is the only one within reach for a pass.
Nathan sees this and readies himself, quickly stepping away to get away from the other team's defense.
But Josh does not pass him the ball and turns to pass it the other way. Since there's no one in any good position on that side, the opposing team wins back the ball, and all the players rush back to the other side of the gym.
"What are you doing?!" Stephens shouts. "Look on your left, Davis! Your left!"
Everything goes downhill from there. It's nearly impossible to get back to - and stay - in the offense, and Nathan can feel that the rest of his teammates are growing frustrated. Coach Stephens looks like he's about to start tearing his hair out. He risks hopping a few feet closer to Josh. "What are you doing?" he calls. "Pull yourself together! We're losing!"
"Shut up!" Josh hisses back, turning to glare at him. He's never looked at Nathan like that. His eyes narrowed into slits, and his lips pulled into a snarl. "Stop what you're doing and leave me alone."
"What did I do?" Nathan asks. He quickly steps back into place, barely blocking the ball from breaching their defense.
"You know damn well!" Josh pushes forward, running ahead and stealing the ball.
The coach is yelling something that they can't hear, but Nathan follows Josh across the court with the rest of the players behind them. Josh scores, and the crowd cheers.
"I have no idea what you're talking about," Nathan says when they jog back. It's hard to concentrate on the game, but he can't focus for as long as Josh isn't cooperating. He doesn't care about the game as much as he cares about Josh.
Josh stops as they're running back to their defensive positions, and when Nathan gets close enough, he shoves him hard in the chest. "You're full of shit, Nate," he hisses. "Wendy told me about the flirting, and all the shit you've been talking," he growls. "You thought I wouldn't find out?"
Something short circuits in Nathan's head, and suddenly the game is all but forgotten. "Wendy said what?" He asks. "I've barely spoken to her. You know we don't get along."
"Bullshit."
"It's not bullshit!" Nathan cries.
"It is! You've both been sneaking around. There is no other explanation! You disappear, and you come back and tell some half-assed lie about where you've been and what you've done! I'm not stupid, Nathan! I know you're not telling the truth!"
Nathan doesn't know if the game around has stopped or if it's still going on, but he and Josh are standing completely still by now. "I'm not-" Nathan isn't sure what to say to that. "She's lying to you. I haven't flirted with her. I haven't hit on her. I don't even speak to her if I can help it!" He shakes his head. "You knew what kind of girl she was when you asked her out." Nathan knows he's gone too far the moment those words fall out of his mouth.
Josh darts forward, and Nathan isn't quick enough to pull his hands and arms up to defend himself when Josh throws a punch.
The punch hits Nathan in the face, and for a moment, he loses both balance and vision as he stumbles back, clutching his nose. Josh shoves him again, and it's hard enough to knock Nathan to the ground.
"What the hell?!" Nathan shouts, glaring up at Josh.
A whistle is blown somewhere, and there are shouts of protest from both the crowd and the coach jogs toward, to try and break them up. But someone else gets there before him.
"What the hell are you doing?!" It's Jonathan. He stands between Nathan and Josh, and when he's sure that Josh won't be throwing any more punches, he turns to Nathan. "Are you okay?" His face is twisted with concern, and he holds out a hand for Nathan to take.
"Who the hell are you?" Josh asks.
Nathan blinks up at Jonathan. "Get the hell off the court. We're in the middle of a game."
"Are you delusional?" Jonathan looks like he's about to start yelling. "You're out here getting your teeth knocked in!"
"I'm fine!" Nathan yells.
"You three!" The coach comes running. "Off the court. All of you!"
"I'm not leaving! We can still win this!" Josh argues.
"You're the one that's disrupting everything!" Jonathan yells, turning back to glare up at Josh. "Who the hell punches their teammates during a goddamn game?!"
Josh's brows sink even further down into an angry scowl, and he balls his hands up into fists. "What? You want some too? Get off the court!" He reaches out and shoves Jonathan back.
Rage floods Nathan. It feels like he's about to burn up. He jumps back up on his feet, reaching out to grab Josh by the shirt. "Touch him, and I'll kick the shit out of you," he growls.
"Guys!" The coach leaps forward and tries to pry the two boys apart. "Stop this right now, or you'll be in detention until you graduate!" His words don't have much impact, but he manages to push the two boys apart.
They continue to glare at one another. The other players on the court watch on and the crowd is murmuring as the fight continues.
Nathan stabs a finger towards Josh. "Listen, jackass. I don't want anything to do with your stupid girlfriend. Never wanted anything to do with her!" He hisses.
"Nathan..." Jonathan says behind him.
Nathan steps closer to his friend, and when the coach looks like he's about to stop him, Nathan stops. "I'm gay," he hisses. "I don't give a shit about Wendy."
"Nathan," Jonathan says. He's more forceful this time.
"I'm getting out of here," Nathan says. "Screw this game." He turns and grabs Jonathan's hand. He holds it as tight as he dares when he pulls Jonathan along, off the court and out of the gym. His bag, clothes, and phone are still in his gym locker, but he doesn't care about those.
Jonathan follows him for a while, and when they're almost at the school cafeteria, he starts to struggle. "Nathan, you're bleeding," he says. "Let's get you cleaned up." He tugs at Nathan's arm, pointing at the nearest restroom.
Neither of them says anything when they linger in the bathroom. Jonathan watches silently as Nathan washes his face. The water is dirty with blood, but it quickly turns pinks and then clear again.
"I can't believe you just did that," Jonathan mumbles when Nathan dries up with a handful of paper towels.
"Mess up the game?"
"Among other things," Jonathan says. He stands with his arms crossed over his chest, leaning against one of the stalls. He flashes Nathan a weak smile. "Well... depending on how many just heard what you said out there... I'd say we're pretty found out."
Nathan nods. "I'm sorry," he says. He grabs another paper towel and rips it up, rolling up the remains to try and plug up his bleeding nose. "I didn't think straight. I got so angry, and I..."
"It's okay," Jonathan says. He walks up to Nathan and puts a hand on his arm. "I'm not mad. I'm sorry about the game and about Josh. But I'm glad that you're okay. What's done is done."
"I didn't mean for it to turn out like that."
"I know," Jonathan assures him. "Don't worry about it. I doubt the crowd on the bleachers heard what you actually said, but... they probably know." He watches Nathan stuff the rolled-up paper in his nostril and chuckles. "You look like such a dork like that."
"Beat up?"
"With your nose stuffed with paper," Jonathan says. "You kind of look like a snail with hose little paper rolls sticking out like that."
Nathan can't help but let out a huff of air. It's not a full-laugh. He's too tired for a real laugh. "A snail? That's the weirdest thing I've been called." He smiles. "Do I really, though?"
"A big, sad nail with two paper tentacles," Jonathan says with a nod.
Nathan sighs. "I love you," he says. "Do you want to get out of here?"
They quickly finish up, and Nathan makes his way back to the locker room to grab his things. Thankfully, he manages to do that without being noticed, and he exits through the back door and meets up with Jonathan by the car.
When the shock has settled, and the realization of what just happened starts to sink in, they're almost halfway to Willot. A mix of dread, anxiety, and nausea settles in Nathan's stomach, and his face falls into a frown as he drives.
"Do you think I made a mistake?" He asks. "Did I screw up?"
"You didn't do anything wrong," Jonathan tells him, reaching over to lay a hand on his arm. "You didn't start that fight, and you defended yourself."
Nathan shakes his head. "No, I mean what I said. It felt... that didn't feel right. That's not how I wanted it to go. That's not how I wanted him to find out."
Jonathan lets his hand fall back down into his lap. "It happened," he mumbles. "There's not really much to do about it now. Actually, there's absolutely nothing we can do about it."
"Doesn't that freak you out?"
"Oh, don't worry. I'm sufficiently freaked out. I'm just really good at hiding it because I know that there's only room for one of us to freak out. I'm waiting to see if that's going to be you or me."
Nathan sighs, sinking slightly deeper into the seat. He slows down slightly, taking a left turn and continuing down the next street. "That's so thoughtful of you."
They're both quiet for a while. Jonathan keeps casting glances over at the driver, and then he finally speaks up. "If your friends care about you as much as they seem to, and as much as you say, then this shouldn't be a problem, Nate," he says. "At least not for them. If Josh is your best friend, he'll get over it."
"What makes you think so?" Nathan asks.
Jonathan rolls his eyes. "Because the two of you have fought before, and you've made up before. Even when things look really nasty."
Nathan thinks about it for a moment before he shakes his head again. "Can we change the topic? I don't want to talk about it anymore."
"I've got some ice cream in the freezer, and they are only running reality show reruns today," Jonathan says, without missing a beat. "You want to hole up and sit through that with me?"
"I'd love to," Nathan says.