"I can't believe you said my breath smells like stale chewing gum, I also can't believe you know what that smell is to put a name like that on it."
Gabriel peered over the menu, I could see his stone cold eyes staring at me, before he raised both his eyebrows sighing, lowering the menu.
"Are you still going on about it?"
Perhaps I mentioned it a few times, on the way back from the hike, in the car to Fern and Gabriel and now at the restaurant where we were pretending to be on a date to make up for our fight or whatever concoction of a dumb story Fern was making up. Yes, I did go on about it for a bit, but I couldn't get over it so I was going to continue to go on about it.
I looked up, staring at him hard, "Of course I am, that was rude you know."
"It was a compliment..."
"I don't see how it is," I said as I looked back at the menu, there wasn't much on the menu but it was still taking us a long time to pick. I could see Fern from a table far away from us, he better be taking pictures quickly so we could leave.
Maybe I should order something small so I could scoff it and leave, I felt so out of place in this restaurant. Fern drove us home so we both could change into more appropriate clothing, so it looked like we were out on a different day.
Was a photo album really necessary for his satan of a grandmother? Surely some photoshopped pictures would do the job.
"I'm saying your breath was not bad."
"For some reason I feel like stale chewing gum...is a stinky smell."
Gabriel sighed, looking back at the menu instead, deciding that his answer was going to be silence. Probably a smart move because I was no where near dropping this.
"Change the subject."
"About what? What else can I talk about with my boss that's not work or stale chewing gum related?"
Gabriel looked up another weird look on his face as he regarded me, "You seem to be doing a lot of the talking anyway, so I'm sure you'll find something to talk about."
"Fine," I muttered looking at the menu for the tenth time, not being able to focus on what I wanted.
"So why did you need me, surely you have some other female acquaintances that you could rely on right?" I asked, when he didn't reply I leaned in, "Wait, you don't."
"I don't see how that's any of your business."
"Well it's this or stale chewing gum, take your topic."
Gabriel leaned back in his chair, his arms were on the table, either side of the plate, one hand's fingers taping agains the expensive white satin cloth.
"Not much of a range,"
"Okay I'll add a new one, so why are we pretending. Fern didn't tell me the whole story," I said.
Judging byt he look Gabriel had, it was another off the list topic.
"You're being very inquisitive into my personal life," Gabriel pointed out, rolling up the sleeves of his white shirt.
"Hey you got me involved remember, so spill the deets boss."
Gabriel looked uncomfortable as he shifted in his chair sitting upright, "No reason for you to know seeing as your my employee."
I rolled my eyes, "Are you even listening? I just said you got me involved in this mess in a non professional manner so the least you can do is tell me."
"Mouthy Rory, you're getting mouthy."
"I figured I might as well quit after this so I can be mouthy as I want," I shrugged.
"Quit?"
"Yeah well Fern said I can take as much money as I can, so I'll retire. Jokes...but seriously you expect me to work with a straight face after this? I'm leaving. Oh, can you count this conversation as my notice?"
Gabriel looked at me for a long moment, before nodding, "Sure."
"Really?" I asked.
"Well I can't force you to stay and it seems like a reasonable request after all I am the one being unreasonable."
"Exactly, my breath does not stink like stale chewing gum," I emphasised.
Just then the waiter came to take our superficial order, both of us ordering the same thing and waited till he left.
"So am I going to find out the story of why we're doing all this. Fern said that it was better you got the money than someone else who's the someone else and what is this inheritance war. It seems almost...movie like you know."
Gabriel's grey eyes almost rolled as he casted a look at Fern, probably wondering when this ordeal was over. Probably wishing the same as I was, to go back to our rooms and go to bed so we didn't have to pretend. I wondered if his grandmother had anyone following us, there was a guy on another table who hadn't stopped staring at me since we arrived. Maybe he was a spy.
Or maybe I was just reading too much into it.
"What are you going to do with the money?"
"Nothing big, just buy a house maybe, one with a big big backyard so I can get a dog, then I'll find myself a more relaxed job, i'll just take what I need. Fern keeps saying you don't need this money, so what are you going to do with it."
"I don't make plans before I get it. It's bad luck."
"Oh," I said, resting my chin on my hand and elbow on the table, Gabriel wasn't normally a superstitious man so that was a lie. The food arrived and I sat up again looking at the not so great lasagne in front of me.
I grabbed my fork, cutting of a big corner piece and placing it in my mouth, but when I saw Gabriel use his fork and knife, I was wondering if I was being a slob.
I mean it was lasagne, it was soft enough that you didn't need a knife. I shrugged it off, oh well, who cares there wasn't many people around us.
I cut into it again taking another big bite when something sharp against my teeth and gums made me pause, there was a crack.
"Oh my god," I murmured, and my throat tried gagging at the intrusion in my mouth, combined with the way too big piece of lasagne and saliva that was producing way too fast trying to get it out of my mouth.
Gabriel looked up, his grey eyes confused "Are you ok?"
I couldn't respond, without the risk of it all dribbling down my face and I looked around the table for the napkin that was on my lap before, where the hell did it go now?
"Rory?"
I leaned forward, spitting the entire contents of my mouth onto the plate, a disgusting site that Gabriel said nothing in respond to, thankfully, but I was positive that it would put him off his meal.
"Oh my god," I said looking at the massive ring on the plate, tears welling up in my eyes.
"Great, we got the perfect shot."
We both looked up at Fern, standing over us with the camera in my face.
"You're a good actor Rory."
"It's not acting you bloody fucking moron!" I snapped.
Both of them looked at me, Fern's smile dropped of his face looking confused.
I reached into the mushy half chewed lasagne on my plate, surrounded my liquid lasagne, did these idiots think the red was the sauce? I grabbed the piece next to the ring, the item they both forgot to look at and held it up.
"You broke my tooth!"
"Oh." Gabriel said as Fern's face of joy was suddenly drained.
"Your bloody ring broke my tooth."
"I didn't know there was a ring in there," Gabriel said, placing his fork down and looking at Fern who kept his blank stare at me.
"Uh oh," He winced, "You've got blood coming out of your mouth."
I lifted my hand placing it against my mouth, I wasn't sure if I should be glad that it was my third teeth that was broken, so it wasn't immediately noticeable, or to stab Fern with the knife cause it hurt so much.
"Maybe...we should take you to the doctor."
"You think?" I asked as I stood up. Gabriel handed me his napkin as I placed it against my mouth, "You could have warned us!"
"But I wanted it to be a natural shock!" Fern said in his defence.
"Oh, you got shock and tears for sure," I muttered.
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