"Grandma, I have feelings for a boy."
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"Grandma I've messed everything up." Jasper begins to confess, as his grandmother looks at him with kind eyes. "I'm hurting those around me and I'm hurting myself."
His grandmother takes her hand to her mask and pulls it down slightly so she is able to speak. "Tell me." She says, her voice weak, but still caring. His grandmother would always take the time to listen.
Jasper swallows hard, knowing that the next few words won't be able to be taken back, once spoken. "Grandma. I have feelings for a boy." He looks at her to see her reaction. A smile slowly spreads across her face.
She seems unbiased by this confession and only replies with the words, "Tell me about him."
Jasper looks a little into the distance recalling the man who had gotten him feeling this way. "He is a little older than me, a couple of years. He has dark brown hair and the most amazing eyes and his smile..." Jasper smiles to himself just thinking about it. "Grandma, he is fun to be around and so confident and I know he likes me too, but I've messed up."
His grandmother squeezes his hand tightly. "Tell him my love. Tell him you're sorry. All will be well." She ends the sentence with a coughing fit and Jasper hurriedly replaces the mask over her face, which alleviates it somewhat.
Jasper again sits next to his grandmother. "Thank you grandma. I love you." He leans over to kiss her on the cheek. She smiles through the mask before once again closing her eyes. Jasper sits back down, watching her for a time, before getting up and leaving the room. He sees his mother and uncle on the row of chairs in the corridor. "She's asleep." he says as he finally sits down on the chair next to his mother. He takes her hand and pulls her in for a hug. She wraps her arms around her son and they both cry on eachothers shoulders.
***
Thomas eventually awoke from his afternoon nap. He rolled onto his back, not really wanting to get up, but knew that he couldn't stay in bed all day. He drags himself off the bed and exits his room. His grandfather still sat in his easy chair "Finally showing your face?" He chides. Thomas chooses to let the comment pass. "I'm not your personal assistant!" His grandfather adds.
Thomas looks at the old man. "What do you mean grandpa?"
"Molly called from the farm a couple of hours ago. Something about Jim's mother being very sick.
Thomas' eyes widen. "What? Grandpa, why didn't you wake me?"
His grandfather just dismisses the comment. "They're not your family. What do you care? I'm your family!"
Thomas hurries to the door, pulling on his boots. "Where are you going boy?" The old man asks.
"To Mol's. You should have woken me grandpa." Thomas rushes out of the door and gets on his bike, which is resting by the wall. He begins to pedal as fast as he can to the farmhouse.
"Mol?" Thomas calls as he enters the kitchen through the side door. His sister is sitting at the long wooden table, the cordless house phone resting on the wooden surface in front of her.
She looks up to see her brother and stands up as they share a hug. "Thomas. Where have you been?" They both sit down next to each other on the bench.
"Sorry Mol. Grandpa only just told me you called! I was sleeping."
Molly looks at Thomas with a frown. "You weren't at the stables with Jasper. Why were you home in bed?"
Thomas looks down on himself. "We fought again and I left." He looks back at his sister.
"What was it this time?" She says with a sigh.
Thomas shakes his head when he thinks about their disagreement, now overshadowed by recent events "It's not important right now. Mol, what's going on?"
Molly looks at Thomas and he can see a few tears welling up in her eyes. "Jimmy's mother, Jasper's grandma. She is ill, I mean she has been for a while but it's taken a turn for the worse. They don't think she has long to live."
Thomas puts an arm around Molly's shoulder and holds her tight. "I'll stay and help with the farm Mol...until Jim gets back."
"Thank you." Molly replies, holding Thomas close by his shirt.
***
It's late evening and Thomas turns over in the spare room upstairs in Jim and his sister's farmhouse. He soon becomes aware of a noise downstairs. The sky outside is pitch dark. Thomas gets out of bed and makes his way to the door and quietly opens it. He can hear muffled talking and sobs coming from the kitchen. He quietly tiptoes down the stairs and peers through the small opening of the kitchen doorway. He sees Jim resting his head on Molly's shoulder and can hear his quiet sobs. Molly has her arms around him, rubbing soothing circles on his back. It doesn't take a genius to work out what was going on.
Thomas slowly leans into the kitchen. "Mol?"
Molly pulls away from Jim slightly. Her eyes also puffy from crying. "It's sad news Tom. She is gone."
Thomas bites his lips in. He knew what it felt like to lose a close family member. His own grandma was very special to him too. "I...I'm sorry Jim." Thomas says, still choosing to stay at the door. He then looks around the kitchen "Where's Jasper?"
"He's with his mother. I don't know if he's coming back." Jim says, wiping his eyes with the palms of his hands.
Thomas looks to the floor. He understood completely why Jasper would be with his mother right now, but still hated how they had ended their last meeting, with 'fuck you!' being the last words he said to him.
Jim approaches Thomas, clearing his throat. "So, I'm gonna have to be back and forth for a couple of weeks, you know, with the funeral arrangements and everything, so I wondered if you would help Molly around the farm whilst I'm away?"
Thomas nods. "Sure Jim."
Jim rests his hand on his shoulder. "Good lad." He then looks away slightly. "Actually there is something you could do for me now."
"What?" Thomas asks.
"Jasper left this morning without his personal belongings. I wondered if you could get everything together for him. I'm going back first thing.
"Yeah no problem." Thomas says and turns to leave the kitchen, but then turns back again. "Jim?"
"Mmm?" Jim replies wearily.
"When I've packed his stuff, can I come with you in the morning? I want to give it to him myself."
Jim sighs and looks at Molly. "Thomas I don't know. I don't want Molly to have to do everything by herself in the morning.
"I'll get up extra early then." Thomas offers. "Please?"
"I'll be fine Jimmy." Molly reassures. "Besides, Jasper might want someone his age to talk to about it. We lost our grandma when Thomas was around the same age, maybe a little younger."
"Ok then." Jim agrees. "I guess we should all get some rest."