I am scared
of losing this pain
that I am carrying with me right now
for I have nothing more
to hold onto
if I let it go
and I know
that will hurt more
✨
Author's Boring Life Update
So...I guess past few days haven't been very kind to me. I've been struggling, trying to find some ground to stand my feet on but I somehow end up falling more. The more I try to move forward, the more I get weighed down by things happening around me. I try being stronger than it, but at the end of the day, there's only so much I can take without letting it affect me mentally too. I really really don't want to mope around here right now, but I feel like talking too. It's a weird push and pull. Haha. Anyway, I've just been having a bit of hard time keeping up with things. Specially writing and Wattpad. And pretty much everything else. I want to work on it, I have these things on my list that I'd like to focus on but there are these other things, things I am so uncertain about that I can't seem to take a decision on them, that keep bothering me.
So even when I try to focus on good thoughts, on "positive" ones as they say, on things I like to do, on things that are healthier for me, things I can utilise my time on...I just end up getting bombarded with these thoughts that make me stop everything else that I'm trying to do.
It's just hard these days I guess. A lot of things are not working out and even when there's no good happening, bad always does.
Anyway, I just thought I'd write it here. Sometimes it helps to have a discussion. Even if it is a one-sided one. I don't want to worry anyone so you don't need to take this too seriously. I'll figure my way out sooner or later. I always do. I have to, right?
But if you're having a hard time, I'd say that it's best to talk it out. Knowing that even one more person knows of your struggle kind of helps a lot. In a way. So talk it out, don't try holding it in. Specially not for too long. I hope you're all going to be okay. Stay strong. For yourself.💜
PS sorry about irregular updates, it's really becoming harder and harder to sit down and even try to write these days. I have been struggling with writing for a while now but I can't seem to even give it time to practice these days. It's scary, not being able to write like before, but I'm trying. It's better than giving up.
Have a good day/night!
PPS I might delete this later. I feel like I've over shared.
💫